Cold fingers tingle up my back, edged with numbness. But I don't move. I keep sitting up against her door, waiting to hear if she needs me.

While my mum didn't exactly say to do this, she did say to stay close to her tonight in case she needs me following a nightmare or waking to a strange room. I honestly think it would scare anyone, but especially someone with her trauma.

I just don't want her to wake up confused or frightened. Watching her talk to my mum whilst one hand stroked Liam's little head and the other held onto her belly almost broke me. I was about another minute from dropping to my knees and asking her to be mine.

I just know she's made to be mine.

She already is, in my head. But I know it would be cruel and manipulative to ask her to be mine right now. She'd see it as payment for staying with me, for the food, for the clothes.

Mum told me this herself- I'm not an idiot, I had already worked that one out. Though I don't often speak my thoughts, that doesn't make me an idiot.

My phone buzzes in my pocket and I pull it out, wondering who it could be at this time. My brother's name appears on the screen and my confusion only deepens. We never talk, let alone text.

Hey bror

Could do with a favour. Got a bit of a situation going on down here- could you send me a few men?

Ignoring his message, I make a mental note to call him tomorrow with dad. It's always best to have a witness when it comes to my brother.

I switch off my phone screen and let my head hang back against the door. Closing my eyes I try to keep my thoughts busy. I shouldn't sleep, I need to stay awake for Astrid.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

A scream jolts me awake.

Shit! Shit! I must've fallen asleep. Stumbling to my feet, I open her door. My eyes take a second to adjust from sleep as I crash towards the bed.

Astrid is sitting bolt upright in bed, her eyes staring sightlessly forward, mouth open in a silent scream.

"Astrid." I exclaim as sit directly in front of her vision. "Astrid baby I'm here. Baby you're safe. You're safe."

I repeat it over and over again as I pull her into my arms. Her sobs are audible now as she hides in my chest. I rub a hand soothingly up and down her back in long strokes while rocking her slowly.

After a few minutes her tears slow and she begins to hiccup and whimper. Her little face turns up to look at me and I gaze down at her. She's still in my arms. I hope they make her feel safe.

I'm taking the fact that she hasn't pulled away as a good sign. However I don't want to over step my boundaries here or her's for that matter, she was frightened.

That's all. That's all. I tell myself over and over again.

I go to retreat, I begin to remove my arms from around her. Immediately she begins to burrow into my chest again, wrapping her arms around me and whimpering.

Shock takes over me but I don't want to upset her further so I carefully spin myself around. I'm now leaning against the headboard and Astrid is curled up in my lap, face pressed into my hoody material, little fingers turning white as they grip onto me.

"You want to talk about it?" I murmur into her hair.

"H-he found me." She chokes out. I shush her softly and rock her from side to side.

"He will always find me."

"No Astrid, he will never find you again. He will never hurt you or Liam. But when I find him... I will make him plead for the blessed mercy of death, because anything will be better than living with my revenge."

After I've spoken my words I fear I've been too aggressive, too frightening. Instead of fear, her tear stained face turns up to look at me. Grey eyes staring me down, pouty lips trembling.

"P-promise?"

"With all my heart baby. With all my heart."