scarlet's pov :

I sat there staring at Kristian as he finished telling me his heart breaking past. I always felt bad about mine but right now my past seems like a walk in the park versus his , my heart ached as a tear slipped past Kristian's eye and sorrow filled his ashen face. I didn't know what to do. I wanted to comfort him but I didn't know how !

"I am so sorry you had to go through that , neither you or your family deserved this kind of life " I embraced kristian tightly as he snuggled his face in the crock of my shoulder , after a couple of minutes of us being quite i felt kristian push himself of off me as he smiled apologetically

"I never knew that you were in the mafia " i knew that this topic could have waited for a better time but I couldn't get it out of my mind and it was bothering me

"I never knew that you were in the mafia " i knew that this topic could have waited for a better time but i couldn't get it out of my mind and it was bothering me

"I didn't mean to hide it from you , I just didn't want to scare you " kristian said as he looked into my eyes with hesitation

"I am not scared , something like this won't scare me away , but i would like to know more about it , i don't want us to have any secrets kristian "

"Alright , when i was young , i think i was 17 , i joined the mafia or more accurately i built my own gang . at first it was a small thing with just close friends , our motto was to never hurt the weak and to help those who need the help , and support our families from behind the scenes , but with time it become so much more , we managed to become one of the strongest gangs in our country and in Italy and Spain and so many places . even though we never used the knight's family name as a support , we were able to back up our families without anyone knowing about it. At 19 or 20 my father asked me to leave the gang so I could focus on business , he didn't want me to be tangled in that side of the world for any longer. He and my mother were worried that I might never be able to leave it and it might cause me harm some day . but really i didn't mind leavin' since i knew that no matter what happens i will have the old gang to back me up , and when the time came for me to leave , i took mateo with me and left mason responsible for taking care of the gang . "

"Wait, are you saying Mason , my manager mason? The gentle , calm , arrogant man , is the head of your old mafia? " i asked with bewilderment all over my face

Kristian laughed at my strange face expression and pushed a stranded hair behind my ear

" he was until he decided that he wanted to work in the show business , so now we have five heads to the mafia but we all work in the shadows no one knows the real names or who we are "

"We??"

" me , mateo , mason , Adam , and jack. Us five are supporting the organization from behind the scenes " kristian stopped talking as he stared at me with worries in his eyes , i knew that my face was no better since all i could feel at this moment was panic , everything i just heard was sinking in , my boyfriend , the man that i love and all his family that i consider my own were in the mafia? what kind of a life is this , i am merely a simple girl who just started realizing her dreams ...

"Principessa , are you alright ? you look pale ?" Kristian's hand was on my cold cheek " and you're really cold ! are you okay scarlet ?" i nodded my head to calm him down

"I -- i am okay , just a bit shocked , everything you told me just started sinking in and i realized how much danger you are in ,and Noah and mateo , i mean i know i haven't known you guys for long but you guys are already my family ..." at this point i was already blabbering , and my breathing was haggard and i was having hard time to breath as i imagined every bad outcome in life

"Hey scar, shit , you need to calm down , everything is alright , you just need to breath baby " kristian stood up and sat me down on the bed as he caressed my back gently

"I... i , can't brea...th "

"Shit , where is the inhaler ?" kristian was searching frantically in the room as my panic attack had finally caused me to have hard time breathing , after a second kristian came back with the inhaler running as he screamed Mateo's name really loud , he sat by my side and helped my use the inhaler to get my breath back , after a couple of second a dishevelled mateo came running and banged the door open

" what the?? What happened ?" mateo came forward and helped me lay down in a position where i can breathe more freely , the attack had already passed and i was regaining my composure . i opened my eyes to see both guys staring at me with worry , kristian was clearly in shock

"I am sorry..." cough " i don't know what happened !"

"How are you feeling ? any pain ? " mateo asked as he measured my heart beat in his other hand

"No, i feel fine , just a bit out of focus "

"That's normal , give it a minute or two and you will be fine " mateo smiled as he stood up and took a step back

"Thanks, do you mind checking on Noah? , right now our voices were really loud "

"Uhm, no problem, you rest for now " mateo said as he patted Kristian's shoulder and left the room , closing the door behind him , Kristian continued standing beside my bed with a gloomy expression . i pushed myself up and held his hand pulling him closer to the bed

"Babe??"

"I am sorry " kristian whispered as he sat beside me and held my hands in his with his head bent down hiding his face

"For what ? it was my fault for panicking like that for no reason " i pushed Kristian's face with my hand so he can meet my eyes

"You have every right to panic , i just threw on you a whole load of shit that you didn't sign for " i laughed out loud at his weird usage of words

"That's not it !"

"Ha? What do you mean ?"

"I didn't panic because of that ?"

"Then ?"

"I got worried I guess , my mind started thinking of all the bad things that can happen in mafia world and thinking about you and my friends and mateo getting hurt made me panic " sadness took over my body as i relived those thoughts but this time more calmly .

"scar , nothing well ever happen to us , we all have each other's back , i will never let anyone else get hurt on my watch , but--- i want you to promise to never leave me , you are my life now my evrything ..." kristian stopped talking as sadness took over his ocean eyes , i held his hand and sat closer to him to reassure him that I am here and that i am not going anywhere

" I apologize for acting this weak , ever since I met you I have been more vulnerable and emotional , you broke my walls scarlet , you made me the gentle person I was before all this chaos started , thank you " I smiled gently as i held Kristian's face in my hands and pulled him closer to kiss him gently on his red lips , as usual our kiss was gentle and full of tenderness but slowly that gentleness turned into so much more , hunger , thirst and anticipation for what comes next .

I felt my body being thrown violently into the bed and kristian straddling me , the ashen of his face was replaced by a hungry look , full of lust and love , a hint of gentleness laid in his aggressive eyes

" we should stop " he whispered beside my ear , my body shivered as i pulled him closer

"no we shouldn't "

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to be continued

A\N

don't hate me guys , remember i love you all

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