《Letters to Inmate 29901》Chapter 71
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I just got my ass kicked by a guy that didn't deserve it.
The humiliation from it still stung, not just my bruised jaw and ego.
Seeing Lillie again knocked me out. Literally!
And with her, old emotions were brought back that were buried deep. Her face drowned out the sea of faces around her, blocking everything out. Only she had that effect on me and still has, obviously.
I was baffled by the thought of Lillie here in New York City. Questions swarmed through my mind.
Was I supposed to approach her?
Talk to her?
Did she want me to talk to her?
Why was she and Sassi hanging out with Kyle?
How the hell did that even happen? Did I miss something?
We hadn't spoken in so long; I didn't know where I stood with her and wasn't sure what steps to take.
It honestly surprised me to see Lillie in the club when I walked in. She looked breathtaking. I never seen her look like this. She had a tight dress on revealing her slender legs, crossed tight together, as if she was getting cold. Her brown curls hung over her delicate shoulders.
Her hazel eyes snapped to me, but she looked quickly away.
It stung.
I couldn't blame her. Our meeting like this was very unexpected, curtesy of Kyle. And not to mention the two women seated at each side of me. It wasn't a good look. I regretted allowing them to enter the VIP section. Lillie probably thought low of me. Fuck, she probably hated me now.
I stared at her all evening, ignoring the women's conversation. It's not like they were here for me, anyway. Lillie looked uncomfortable, and I somewhat felt uncomfortable for her. She had a glimpse of my world, and I knew she didn't belong.
It bothered me she was in eyeshot with people I didn't want around her. I turned and glanced at Big Ben, Roxanne huddled near him, and I scowled. Shit, I didn't want the bastard even snatching a glance at Lillie.
My heart constricted.
Lillie got up and walked down the stairs, clutching herself with her arms around her. I watched her leave.
Should I go after her?
Would she want me to?
Did I want to?
Fuck yes, I did!
I shook my head hard, feeling like the world's biggest jerk. I couldn't leave Lillie like this, like we were strangers. It felt fucking wrong!
I sprang to my feet and followed her out of the VIP section. She walked across the dancefloor to the entrance, and I wasn't far behind. I found her outside, away from the crowd of people. I walked up to her carefully. She turned around abruptly and fell into my chest. I grabbed her arms to steady her, and I almost forgot how soft her skin felt.
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My eyes connected to her pretty hazel ones I fell in love with months and months ago. Filled with emotions I couldn't place... sadness, regret, disappointment... anger. Damn, I forgot how fucking beautiful she was. A burst of warm, familiar emotions rippling through within seconds. She pulled her hand out of my tight grip and brushed past me to continue to walk back to the club.
I stopped her by grabbing her wrist.
"Lillie..." I began softly. "Can we talk?"
"No! we can't." She said, not looking at me.
"Please... Please Lillie." I begged and let go of her wrist.
She stood still and hugged herself. "What is it?" she said, still avoiding my gaze.
"Please look at me." I pleaded. I moved slightly back, giving her some space.
Lillie looked to the left and right side of her, and finally looked at me breathing out. She looked cold from the chilled night, and I wanted to reach out and hold her. I felt it by instinct. She looked at me and shrugged while biting her bottom lip.
Suddenly, I felt extremely nervous.
"How have you been doing?" I asked.
She gave a tight smile. "Fine... and you?"
I nodded. "Okay, I guess, but could be better." I said, rubbing my head.
Shit, this felt awkward.
"So, what have you been up to these days?" I asked hesitantly.
Lillie snapped her eyes at me and gave me a pointed look. "Like you care!"
Hell. She looked angry. I've never seen Lillie upset before, now that I come to think of it. Her hair was slightly disheveled and her eyes bright with heat. I don't know why, but it made me feel a certain way. I tried to conceal the smile etched up the corner of my mouth.
Lillie looked stunned. "You think this is funny?!" she shouted, her arms flaring to her sides.
Her face turned a shade of red as she lunged at me. I didn't expect it. I felt a burn on my left cheek where Lillie had slapped me hard. She started hitting me in the chest. Her punches were soft, but I could feel her anger in them. It shocked me she unleashed this way.
Shit! I really messed up this time.
"You think this is a joke, Dimitri?!" she shouted, her voice slightly breaking. "You don't care about me or my feelings!"
We earned a few stares from the crowd, but they were too drunk to fully care, thinking it's just another lover's quarrel. Lillie started tearing up and that broke me. I didn't expect to make her this upset. Something raw stirred inside and watching Lillie this aggressive did something to me. I grabbed her arms, stopping her from doing anything further.
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I didn't stop the next thing I did.
I pushed my lips against hers in a desperate plea. The kiss was deep and hard. Lillie was reluctant at first, but I dominated my tongue against hers as I consumed her. I grabbed her waist and pulled her warm, soft body against mine. She let out a tiny moan as she lightly touched my chest. Her tears dripped from her cheeks and were salty on my tongue. I didn't care who was looking at that point. I wanted this woman. I wanted Lillie... now!
"What the hell is going on here!?"
Lillie broke our kiss, turned around and shoved me off her. Our love bubble burst wide open. I turned around to see Sassi looking between us, her hands on her hips and looking wild.
She looked at Lillie, her mouth agape. "I went to the bathroom, thinking you were there. I checked and no Lillie. I even looked under each stall! I looked all over the club and I couldn't find you. Do you know how freaked out I was?" She placed a hand over her chest in a dramatic gesture. "I walk outside the club looking for my best friend and here you are sucking face with DIMITRI!" she shouted.
Lillie brushed past me and headed to Sassi, saying something I couldn't hear.
"Let's just go, please." Lillie said, wiping the tears from her face.
Sassi noticed she had been crying. And drew her attention to me, daggers in her eyes.
"What did you do to her now, huh?" Sassi seethed. "I should've fucking knew this was a mistake!"
I walked up to Lillie, grabbing her hand. "Can we please talk?" I asked.
She pulled her hand and shook her head. "There's nothing to talk about, Dimitri."
"Why?" I said.
Lillie stopped and looked at me, Sassi staggering hot on her heels.
"Why?" she began. "You up and left me without an explanation. You left me confused and hurt. You didn't say where you're going and never bothered to contact me again, to check up on me. You didn't care, you threw everything away what we had together without talking to me. You hurt me Dimitri... you broke my heart!" she cried, tears streaming down again.
I flinched at her words as it pierced through me, especially the last part... I broke her heart. I felt like complete shit. I gulped, a lump in my throat forming, her words hitting me hard.
Sassi placed her arm across Lillie's shoulders and ushered her in the cab that stopped in front of them. I walked towards the cab to get to Lillie. Sassi pointed at me. "Don't you dare come closer Dimitri, you hurt her enough!" Sassi glowered.
They both entered the cab, and I stopped the door from closing, blocking it.
"Lillie... please... I didn't mean to hurt you... let me explain... you can't leave like this." I stuttered, desperate to rectify this fucked up situation.
Sassi tried to close the door in her tipsy state.
"No- No- No, let go, she cried enough over you Dimitri, Lillie's moved on!" Sassi shouted.
Moved on? What the fuck was that supposed to mean?
I looked at Lillie, blinking hard. She didn't look at me and looked outside the cab's window. An arm gripped around me, pulling me back from the cab. I turned sharply, annoyed that somebody had the balls to draw me away, but saw Kyle grinning at me. I was determined not to let Lillie leave in this state.
He came up to my ear. "Don't worry man, I know where they at. Sassi told me, I got you, bro."
I took in Kyle's words and accepted this. I moved away slowly from the cab's door as Sassi slammed it shut. The cab drove away, and my heart sunk with it.
I hated myself for doing this to Lillie, being the one responsible for her heartache. I had to explain myself and make it right with her. She couldn't have moved on. The thought of losing her to someone else riled me up and shook me to my core.
I'll fucking win her back if that's the last thing I do. Realizing how I could've let her go in the first place.
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