Chapter Forty-Four

I walk for an hour, maybe two, I'm unsure. I use the time alone to think. I contemplate my future, and whether I should stay with Riley. Ellie doesn't want me to leave, him and I certainly don't want to leave him either, but what if it is what's best, despite what we want?

Riley and Ellie seem to get along for the most part, which is not something I ever expected. I know that Ellie is still uncomfortable around other people, but he's doing better. I can see he's trying and when he's nervous he ends up taking time to himself, by moving to the shed, alone.

Many times I have though about talking to him. I tried to last night, but he was preoccupied with the cut on his arm, that I decided it wasn't the best time to discuss our relationship, and the fact that I don't care if I'm risking my life by touching him, I would gladly do so were it not for his stubbornness.

I know that he cares about me, which is why I'm starting to wonder if us being together is a good thing. Riley knows him, well, he knows his body, the way he works. I know Ellie in a different way. I know his personality. I know what he likes, and what he is uncomfortable with. I know that he would do anything for me, and I would do anything for him.

I sigh, and look up at the sky, there are clouds rolling in, dark ones. I'm not exactly sure where I'm at in the neighborhood; all the houses look the same, and I wasn't really paying attention to where I was going anyway.

I turn around, and begin to walk back the way I came, sure that eventually I'll find Riley's house again.

Twenty minutes later, I'm running. I feel the beginning of a storm start sprinkling all around me, and the last thing I want to get caught up in it.

I see Riley's house up ahead, but something stops me, though the rain is now hitting more and more against my skin, I have a strange feeling in my chest. It is as if something is urging me to be cautious; something isn't right.

My mind immediately thinks of Ellie, and I run faster than I ever have in my life.

I run through the house calling for Riley or Joy but to my horror, I don't receive an answer.

I move to the shed, and the latch is open. I hear screaming coming from below, and Riley shouting, and though I'm already moving quickly, I can't seem to move quick enough.

This can't be happening again. Ellie was doing better, he was controlling it. He can't be losing control again.

I'm underneath the shed in an instant, and I take in the sight before me.

Ellie was backed against a wall, his eyes black, but his hands were shaking. Riley was on the ground, though I don't see any blood.

Joy isn't here, I don't recall seeing her car in the driveway, but I also was too much in a hurry to notice.

I don't know what is going on, but I know I have to stop this.

"Ellie." I speak up, and as if he didn't realize I was here, his head turned to me, and I swear I see his body slightly relax.

"He's going to kill himself." Riley says to me, slowly get up off the floor. "I was trying to stop him."

I feel myself falter, "He what?" I look from Riley to Ellie, "Is that true?"

"No." Ellie spits out, he looks frantic, he looks like he can barley control himself and I don't know what made him act like this. "No, no. I can not die I do not exist."

"What are you talking about?"

"I am not human, I am a carrier, I am a plague." That is when I see just how dark his nails had got. His veins grew darker and darker and he spoke, "I am Three Eleven Thirteen." That was the first time I have ever heard him call himself by his number. He made sure I always called him Ellie, and now he is refuting it.

I turn to Riley, "What happened?"

"I came down to check on him," He explains, "I saw him take a scalpel, he was going to kill himself with it."

"No!" Ellie interjects, "You don't understand." He moves over and pulls out a box from under the table. I recognized it as one of the boxes that was in the attic. When he opened it, we looked inside.

A squirrel, how he even caught it I was sure, was twitching, black oozed from hit's eyes, like it was overflowing with blood. It was horrific.

"This doesn't make sense." I tell him, "This, it's not, I mean you've tested animals before they were fine."

"I am doing this." His voice is low, and the only thing separating us is the metal table. He looks down at the squirrel, and the darker his veins got, the more the squirrel twitched. The more it bled. The worse the blood overtook it.

I couldn't believe it.

"I could infect everything, Ripley." He's staring at me now, so intently, that I have to force myself to stare back. "If I can not control it, then they suffer too. If I infect you, I can not fathom," He doesn't not finish his sentence, and I don't want him to.

I realize Riley hasn't said anything in a while, and I look back at him. He's the one that has studied the blood, he should know more about it. His eyes are trained on the squirrel, but his focus seems to be somewhere else. Slowly his head nods, "This makes sense."

I was hoping he'd disagree with Ellie, not agree. He continues, "Like we stated earlier, he isn't entirely human, which means he has better leverage on controlling the blood. With Rosie and Icah, Icah was controlling the blood flowing through Rosie which means, in a simple explanation, Ellie is similar to Icah." Riley is already rummaging through a drawer pulling out some rubber gloves, he tugs them on, and moves towards Ellie. He grabs his arm, even though his veins are as black as shadows, and lifts it to examine. His eagerness in science and discovery was overriding his caution to be anywhere near Ellie when he is in a state like this, "Your blood," He says to him, "Because you do not function like a human, is entirely yours. It can try to control you, but it fails because you are also in control of it. So if you were to infect someone else, were you in complete control, you could dictate whether it engulfs them like it did to many of our patience at the lab, or settles like it did in Rosie." He shook his head in awe, "Absolutely remarkable."

"So because he wasn't used to the blood, that is why it overtook my father?" I ask, and Riley nods.

"I believe so."

"I do not want this any longer." Ellie quiets the both of us, "I do not want it in me."

"Ellie all you have to do is learn to control it. It will take time."

"Time can murderer someone." He says it like he has already made up his mind. He takes another scalpel from the tray on the table. "I will die, and then it will seize." He looks at me, "And Ripley you will not be infected."

So, this is what he's been thinking about all these hours alone. I wonder just how long it has corrupted his mind. All I know is that I can't possibly let him go through with it. If he dies, then I might as well too.

He begins to cut his arm, black dampens the blade as I do not think. I run over, and I think I am shouting, when I grab the sharp edge of the blade, and yank it out of his hand.

My hand bleeds from my grasp on it, and Ellie's blood that is sticking to the knife, buries itself in my cut. Ellie and I both watch in horror as the veins in my hand grow dark.