Chapter Twenty-Nine

For a second, I was afraid it wouldn't work. Ellie's body tensed as I pushed him up against a tree. He seemed shocked and out of it as our lips collided, my hands balling the fabric of his shirt. I did this to save those children, but I'd be lying if I said that's the only reason why.

My heart was racing, and I couldn't breathe, and I was okay with that. Everything right now is okay.

Ellie's hands were plastered onto the tree behind him as if he didn't know what to do with them. It wasn't until he realized what was happening that he started to kiss back. Slowly one of his hands ventured over to my arm. To my neck.

God, I'm going to have a heart attack.

His hand was now in my hair as I pulled myself closer to him. He was taller than me, I was on my toes until he wasn't satisfied with our position. Willingly he leaned down, pulling me closer, which caught me off guard.

He likes it. He likes this.

My heart. My heart. My heart.

The warmth of his breath was everything I couldn't get enough. Even the smell of him was oddly comforting and I wanted to be this close to him for eternity.

I reluctantly pulled away only because if I didn't get some air into my lungs I was sure I was going to pass out at his feet at any second.

We were silent for a moment, panting, not wanting to address this, not yet.

I dared myself to look up at him, to meet his eyes. He was staring at me, with an expression I've never seen him have before. I wasn't sure how I looked to him, but it probably wasn't nearly as good as he looked considering he seemed to look good no matter what he did.

I, on the other hand, just walked for 6 hours straight and was a sweating mess.

He blinked, the black in his eyes gone, his veins now a faint grey. "Ripley-" He paused, his eyes no longer looking as he watched his own hand trail slowly up my arm. His fingertips gently touching my skin made me shiver and I didn't stop him. Finally, he continued, "We should not do that." His voice was lower now, hesitant.

My heart dropped, and suddenly, I was aware of everything. Our surroundings, our bodies pressed together, the children who could still be heard screaming and laughing way down the road.

"You didn't like it." I said it more as a statement to myself than a question to him.

I could see him falter, suddenly gripping my arm, not allowing me to move away even when I tried. "No that's not what I was saying."

"Then why? Why shouldn't we?" I hadn't realized I had risen my voice, "We're forced to spend all our damn time together, neither of us can have a normal life, so Ellie, why can't we? Why do you insist on living without any feelings for anything or anyone at all?" I pulled out of his grasp, even though I didn't want to, I stepped away from him. We were now feet apart and I hated it.

He was gaping at me wide-eyed, as if he couldn't believe what I was saying. "I feel things too, I am not a machine." He said the word like it was repulsive to even speak. He clenched his fists, "I am not a machine, Ripley."

"Then act like a human being for me and show me that you care for something, God Ellie, anything!"

We watched each other for what seemed like forever. Finally, unable to look at him any longer without crying in the process, I shook my head, scoffed, and looked away. "Whatever, if you want to live alone, that's your choice. I'm tired of trying to understand you." I started to walk away, angry at myself for acting like such a child. I was prepared to accept that I'll be stuck with Ellie for the rest of my life without ever being close to him again.

And then he grabbed my arm, pulled me back to him until our bodies were against each other yet again, and this time, he forced his lips onto mine. I could hardly believe his actions and yet I didn't protest.

This time I took advantage of it. I immediately wrapped my arms around his neck, there was no way he was going to pull away first.

There were more children shouting on the road and yet Ellie didn't even seem like it bothered as he dug his fingernails into my back and pulled me closer until I was sure I'd go right through him.

I had no idea how he knew how to kiss like this, but I didn't care. I didn't care about anything. Not about our current situation on the run, or the black toxicity in his body, or the fact that my father made him in a lab.

I don't care.

My hand trailed down his back, feeling every muscle and every bone. I wanted to physically memorize the structure of his body, just for this moment.

I broke the kiss first, and he leaned his head on my shoulder. His breath on my neck. I was about to say something, but he beat me to it. "Ripley?" He asked, his grip still tight around my body.

"Hmm?"

"Do you love me?"

For an odd reason, I couldn't even hesitate, "Yes."

"No." He said, quieter, "Do you love me, like you love John Lennon?"

I laughed, unable to hide my amusement, "I think I may like you even more than John Lennon."

He pulled back, and for the first time ever, he grinned, a genuine smile that I couldn't help but mimic. "Ellie?" It was my turned to ask him.

"Yes?"

"Do you love me?"

He blinked at me, hesitating, "I don't know what love feels like." He said honestly, "I don't know what feeling is what." The smile faded from his lips, "I am confused, Ripley."

I swallowed and nodded, I'd be lying if I said I wasn't expecting an answer like that. "Then I guess I'll have to do better teaching you." I grabbed his arm, "But let's keep walking before the day runs out, okay?"

He nodded once, "Okay."