《First one》Twenty-Two: have you seen his ass?

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In the morning I woke up, my mind still groggy with sleep and my eyes swollen from crying. I found myself waking up in a cozy bubble, warm and safe. My legs were tangled into a mess of sheets I didn't know how to get out of. My head was snuggled into a hard pillow that smelled like wood mixed with spices. Mmmm that smell, wait I know that smell. As soon as the familiar scent filled my nostrils my eyes shot open wide and my head was instantly fully awake. I wasn't lying on a pillow; my head was resting on Lukas's rock-hard chest and my legs were tangled with his, not with comfortable sheets. Shit.

I know I wanted him to be my friend but somehow last night when I couldn't sleep, I went to seek his comfort. It's impossible to stay away from him and that's why being friends with him was the better alternative than completely staying away. We must have fallen asleep and somehow got tangled. I have to get out of here before Lukas wakes up and especially before Mia gets home. Gently I tried to free my legs and each time our skin grazed I felt a jolt of electricity raging through me and a tingly feeling at the pit of my stomach. Friends, Bella, friends and Jesus how knocked out asleep can someone be...

When I was finally free, I stared at him for a second. He was laying on his back with his head cocked to the side. He looked so peaceful when he was asleep, so calm. Even without sight of his grey eyes his face was more than perfect. His full brows impeccable and his lips beyond kissable. You want to kiss them, I get it, but you can't!My mind reminded me of the deal I made with myself... don't jump into something you might not be ready for. Why do I always make it so difficult for myself?

I closed the door behind me, taking one last look at Lukas sleeping, which made me melt like chocolate in the sun. When I walked into the empty street and the wind hit my face memories of Drew came flooding through my head like a tsunami, crashing everything in its path. I couldn't fight back the tears and I was thankful nobody is this crazy to be up at this hour on a Sunday. I could let my tears spill onto the pavement I'm the first one to walk today, I could wipe away the tears on my cheeks clearing the path for others to come. I didn't have to pretend not being able to breathe and I could let go of everything letting the cold wind take away the guilt.

By the time I arrive at my apartment there weren't any tears left. Before entering I sighed out loud, relief coating my voice and my eyes briefly closed. I put my bag down onto the floor and pushed my shoes into a corner of my bedroom. The soft duvet on my bed was calling my name, I was exhausted and emotionally drained. So, the entire Sunday I crawled underneath the comfort of a warm blanket turning off my phone and every other thing that could attach me to the real world, giving my body and my thoughts some peace.

The next day my message box was lit up with countless messages. So, when I got out of the shower and went to blow-dry my hair, I took a look, because blow-drying your hair is such a waste of time anyway, at least I could dry my hair while doing something other than stand in front of the mirror. The last message in the row made my toes crawl and the hair on my neck stand up. Thank god for the heat of the blow-dryer because I would have turned to a solid ice cube otherwise.

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I didn't mean for any of it to happen... I'm sorry, can we talk? Please...

His message immediately made my eyes sting, but I wasn't going to shed another tear over this piece of shit! I put down the blow-dryer, bit my lip and sucked it up, inhaling before I channeled my anger through my fingertips which were typing away on my phone. I'm in control!

: GO TO HELL!! I have nothing else to say to you!!

I was proud of myself for not letting him get to me. He didn't deserve to explain himself, it happened, and he did something that you can't apologize for no matter how hard you try. I left his message box behind and scrolled to the next one.

: Are you okay? You were gone this morning....🥺

: You didn't have to leave you know that, right?

: Did you get home safely?

: I'm worried, did you walk home?

: Why are you ignoring me? 😫

: So much for being friends huh...? 🤔

Okay, now I feel guilty for turning my phone off. I just wanted peace, not making him think I was ignoring him. I pouted at my phone while thinking of something to respond.

: Sorry, I turned my phone off yesterday. Sweet of you to worry but it's not necessary. I'm fine. 🙂

And I meant it, considering what happened I was fine especially after texting Drew to go to hell. Where the bitch belongs.When I opened a message coming from Mia, I realized she didn't know what had happened unless Lukas told her but if he did, I would have had 34 missed calls and not to forget she would have broken down my door.

: Girl, care to walk me to school? And we need to stop at the café before class, I need some girl talk and caffeine! 😎☕️👯‍♀️

: I'll leave here in ten minutes. I need to tell you something...

I could trust her and I needed someone other than Lukas to know in case I have a mental breakdown from holding back too many secrets, the one about my parents was enough for my head to explode every time Mia talked about her parents and asked about mine. Plus, the last thing I need her to do is set up a double date with me and Drew because I'm pretty sure she was planning on one.

One week had passed since I had told Mia what happened with Drew. Her words: If the son of a bitch ever touches you again, I'm going to castrate him, rip his head off and feed him his fucking balls. I mean it Bella he's going to wish his ball never dropped. I love how she is as protective as her brother and the way she can use words to murder people. She went on like that for fifteen minutes before pulling me into a tight hug and pinky swearing, she would never let him near me again.

At school I tried my best to avoid walking into Drew and so far it had been a success. Lukas on the other hand, I was dying to run into, but he never replied to my text and he never seemed to be on campus that week. Like he had vanished from the surface of the earth. I know we're supposed to be friends. I'm starting to regret ever suggesting it because seems like he isn't very good at being friends with anybody. Staying away from him was harder than I thought and every day I didn't see him he invaded my dreams, leaving me panting for his touch in the morning. I have to see him it's all I can think about!

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My plan was simple, very simple...I simply convinced Mia to study at her place and that's exactly how I found myself standing in front of their apartment door. I put some more effort into my outfit and makeup than normal. I was wearing tight jeans and an ever tighter red long-sleeved t-shirt with my laced-up boots. I curled my blonde hair and put on a full face of makeup. I still looked natural, just a way better version of my natural look. Not the most comfortable study outfit and definitely not the most me but I wanted to impress Lukas. What can I say, can't I look pretty for my friends...?

After one gentle knock on the door it swung open and for once it wasn't Lukas answering the door but his sister. The one time I look more like his type...

"Hey sista!...Holy moly mother of cannelloni! Wow you look like you work behind the counter of Anastasia Beverly Hills." She said, her jaw hitting the floor while welcoming me in. I followed her to the living room where she put everything we needed for a study night on the dining table. Coffee, books, pens, water, vodka... Yeah well, the bottle was only for when we were sick of studying Psychology, a class I discovered she was taking too but had always skipped. I was about to change that and help her. Psychology was actually a class I enjoyed, to my own surprise and I wasn't planning on drinking the poison that corrupted my family.

"You ready? Cause I'm going to make you pass this class!" I said to her while dropping all the study books on the table with a thud.

"If you tell me why you decided to show up looking like a freaking model..." She laughed while sitting down at the table, leaning back in her chair and taking a pen between her teeth. "Girl, it suits you."

"I...I wanted t-to try something else." I stuttered because of course that was a flat out lie but hey couldn't tell her I was here to study AND impress her brother. I wasn't ready to lose the only friend I ever had.

"I like something else on you!" She laughs before taking out her notes and throwing them in front of her like they had hurt her feelings.

"So, let's get started then. But you really have to touch your notes if you want to pass." I laughed while gesturing toward the nots she seems to despise.

"What these?" She said while pointing her pen at the stack of papers in front of her. "They're just empty papers with some random scribbles and drawings of our hot professor, that's the problem." She giggled but I noticed a hint of panic in her voice.

"Oh boy..." I chuckled while shaking my head.

"What... He's hot, have you seen his ass?" She joked but she meant it.

All was going well, at least with the studying part of the plan. The impressing Lukas part was slacking. He wasn't home and I wondered why but it wasn't like I could ask Mia where her brother was without sounding hella suspicious. After two hours of studying I was ready to abandon the plan an suggest Mia to put up a movie or something. But as if the universe was sending me a sign to never give up the front door swung open and Lukas walked through. Handsome as ever in jeans hugging his muscled legs, a black hoodie and his converse. More important, he looked utterly surprised when his eyes met mine, scanning over my features and my outfit.

"Hi." Was all he could say, his lips parted like the words escaped him to say anything else.

"Hey." I said, grinning at his amazed expression while he walked over to the table, scanning his eyes over our books and me.

"Will you stop eye fucking my friend!" Mia hissed at her brother, knowing he hadn't been very nice to me at that party. He frowned at his sister's remark while dropping his bag next to our table and taking a seat. It was funny how he and Mia had the same habit as he leaned back in his chair before taking a pen between his teeth. As his hand put the pen near his lips I notice the white cast on his hand making me gasp internally. It's my fault it's broken but jeez, how can a cast make someone even more attractive?

"Why don't you focus on a class you're never going to pass and I'll focus on whatever the hell I want." He snapped at her direction causing Mia to shake her head as his eyes stayed on me.

"Why don't you go study in your freaking room..." She gritted through her teeth while she kept her eyes on the exercise I gave her.

"I live here, I sit wherever I want Mia..." Lukas scoffed, his gaze never leaving mine while his lips tugged up into a smile. Oh, shit he is eying me up. Shut up that's what you want, enjoy it. My conscious debated.

"Jesus, how do you two live together?"

"We don't." They both said at the same time making me burst out in laughter. Gosh I tried to laugh as elegantly as possible with Lukas staring at me but that was a failed mission from the beginning.

I tried to keep my eyes focused on my notes as Lukas was studying right in front of me, like the seat exactly in front of me. How could I study like this when my eyes wanted to do nothing more than look up and study him while he was studying. That was the plan dumbass?

I felt his eyes on me while I supported my head with my hand at the side of my head, my elbow resting on the table. I couldn't resist and looked up through my eyelashes. He was staring at me with dark eyes and a grin on his face, causing me to smile from ear to ear before putting my free hand in front of my mouth to hide how he was affecting me. But he knew well enough what kind of effect he had on me as the grin on his face became wider at my reaction. Oh dear, this is going to be a long night...

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