"What's going on?" I look around. "What happening?"

"Slade...you've lost."

I freeze, turning around.

I blink, staring at Ofair. I smile. "Lost......I...lost? Me? That's not possible. I'm the God of War. I can't lose. I can't lose a war."

"You haven't lost a war. You've lost her."

My eyes widen. "No...that's not...."

"You've lost all of them."

I stare out into the darkness. "Ah......there be some mistake."

"The only mistake, Slade, is your existence."

I open my eyes looking over at Monika. Her eyes are open. And red.

I sit up, pulling her closer.

"You know I'm slow," she starts. "But I thought you didn't have a mother. Who was that woman? And that man?"

I look up. "They claim to be my parents."

She shifts. "I see. How does that...I mean. How do you feel? About that?"

Feel? About the fact someone created me and then abandoned me?

"Fine," I gruff with a shrug. "How are you feeling, Mon?"

She smiles. "I feel like you don't feel fine. I feel like I've disrupted your life. And I feel like crying for no reason."

She looks down. "Maybe it's my period."

It's not. She gets it every month on the fourth, and she goes very quiet. She stopped bleeding 50 years ago. Her body remembers though, so on the fourth for 8 days she's very quiet and prefers spicy food.

That is not this.

"Maybe," I shrug.

"Or maybe I'm...you know?"

I nod. She's not pregnant either. I control when my sperm is active, and unless she can interfere with that with her power, I haven't done activated it.

She hasn't told me she's ready. There's too much going on. It's not completely out of the question, her being a fertility goddess, but I would sense another gods presence and I don't.

"Maybe so," I smile.

I could tell her these things. But it's better, I think if she can think through options instead of being completely lost.

She likes facts, and when she doesn't have any, she starts to crumble.

Monika takes my hand, rubbing my palm. "You were wanted."

I raise my eyes to her.

"Not just because of hole in the universe or for the sake of balance like you thought. Someone wanted you, specifically to come into existence. It's more than most people can say," she smiles softly.

"I want you. I want you every single day."

• • •

We sit around the dinner table. I've decided not to keep Nathaniel locked up. My stomach turned as I thought of the way I treated him when Monika went missing.

I even gave him extra food and praise.

"So where did you go?" Fallon asks.

She never does understand the mood in a room.

"Your grandparents took me," Monika said nonchalantly, shoveling food into her mouth. "This is really good."

I inhale deeply closing my eyes.

"Grand-you have parents," Nathaniel stands. "You never told me! Who are they where-"

"I didn't know. And don't get used to them, or even start imagining whatever happily every after you envision," I inform him. "Because I plan on killing them. So continue on with the family you have now."

Nathaniel frowns. "Kill...your parents?"

My eye twitched, spoon bending in my grip.

"Stop calling them parents. They're not parents. They're...progenitors." I frown.

"What's the difference?" Fallon asks.

I put my fork down. "I came from them but they didn't parent me. Maybe I was a shitty parent but at least I tried. They didn't try."

It goes silent. I sigh, eating my steak.

"So..."

I look up at Fallon, making her clam her mouth closed.

We eat in silence, but I don't taste anything and I keep thinking about the fact that I thought I was the worst a parent could be.

And I was wrong.