At some point in a gods life they must resign themselves to the fact that they will do the same thing for the rest of eternity or until they are no longer needed.

It's a frightening thing to come to terms with.

I stand, leaving Monika to sleep. Acts of wrath for a new god is exhausting. She'll be out at least for the day. In fact, for the next few years, she'll probably be in and out of comas as her mortal form gets used to her strengthening powers.

Happened to the children.

I get up doing a few tasks. I check on the children. The garden. Po. And then Monika gets up. She doesn't have breakfast, she goes immediately to the only room in the house that's locked with a barrier. She opens it.

She's strong enough to break my barrier. My stomach turns. I squint my eyes to focusing in on them from the kitchen.

She hands him a plate of food. "I know Slade usually brings food by, but I made some extra tea and cookies so I thought..."

Nathaniel looks up at her. I shift a bit closer. "I heard him tell you. Last night. Are you here to tell me I'm a bastard or an orphan or-"

She shakes her head. "Just tea and cookies."

He looks at it. "I don't need it."

She shrugs. "Sweets make life worth living even if you don't need it to live."

He scoffs rolling his eyes. She comes up to him, hesitantly at first, her feet leaving the ground. He lets her approach, not moving.

She cups his cheek. "You look like him. How didn't I see that?"

Nathaniel says nothing. She sits back down, pulling out her needles. She starts crocheting a habit she picked up a few years ago. Helps pass the time she says.

I'd remind her I may have started a war with the gods and any free time she has means she's not training hard enough, but I'm spying so I don't say that.

But I make a note to tell her later.

"I don't understand what you're doing here?"

She looks down, closing her eyes, letting her fingers follow muscle memory. "Slade put you here for your safety. But I imagine it's gotten lonely. I don't know if he'll let the other kids come and play-"

"We're not kids."

She looks up her hands pausing. "I guess not huh? Well, you know what I mean."

"I don't need your pity okay? I'm the son of a god. If you want to pity any of us, you should pity Dion. He has it the worst."

Monika nods. "Dion does say some concerning things, and I worry for him. We never got to know each other though. I thought you hated me."

He looks her in her eyes. "I do."

She stood again, clearing her throat. "I noticed. I didn't want to bother you, or make Slade upset at you. I had step mothers. 7. And most of them were...bitches. They were bitches."

"I'm not your mom or anything and you're grown, I know that. I was thinking about how lonely you must have been as a child-"

He stands. "Where is Slade?"

Monika shrugs. "Somewhere out and about. Maybe terrorizing Fallon she's been hiding from him when he comes to train her."

Wait really? I thought she was just always asleep when I-you know what. That makes more sense.

"Dion has been deceptively quiet and Solice...Solice is always quiet." She chuckles. "Anyway, I guess I came here because...I don't know you. And I want to change that."

"Because I'm Slade's son? A threat to any child you'll have?"

She frowns. "Because now I know why you hate me. I thought it was because I was human. But it's not, is it? It's because you're worried. About not being the most important in the family. Or maybe being an outcast. Of-"

"No Monika. I hate you because you are a human. Just like I hate them because they're humans, and they don't deserve power."

She raised her brow. "Mh. Maybe I got it wrong then. That's okay. I'm not going anywhere and you're not going anywhere so...we could at least get along?"

Nathaniel turns away. "I don't want to get along with you."

She stands. "I understand. That's okay. But...I don't hate you or anything. I'm glad you exist. Slade is too. You both don't say what you mean and you end up regretting it. I know that maybe it's not as high stakes as it is for human you know? Because we can die, and...and maybe it's the last thing you say."

She looks down. "Anyway, You should eat least the cookies. They're good."

He says nothing as she leaves. "Monika?"

She pauses turning around with a smile. "Yeah?"

"I'm not glad you exist," He says picking up the plate and dropping it. "And I wish you would disappear."

No...why would he say that?

Her face falls but she plasters a smile, using her hand to swipe the broken glass onto the tray and put it on a table.

"I see."

I have to talk to Nathaniel. He can't speak to her like that. Fallon speeds up, holding Monika's shoulder.

"You okay, Mom?"

Monika pats her shoulder. "Fine. He doesn't like sweets."

Fallon steers her into the courtyard.

I pause at the door way, about to open it.

"Nathaniel can be...rough," Fallon says softly.

"I get it. I've had seven stepmoms. Seven! But I guess he probably doesn't even see me as that. I'm probably just some random woman Slade brought home one day."

Monika sighs.

I open the door. Nathaniel groans.

"I'm tired of visitors."

"You shouldn't have said that to her."

"Whatever old man."

I clench my jaw. "Nathaniel!"

He looks to at me before rolling his eyes. "Just keep her away from me."

I lean back in my chair watching him. "I can't make you like her. But you will respect her." I stand. "And when you see her again, apologize."