••

Mason

The girl I was with last night was Kenzie Matlock. I had to do something to get Will out of my head. Yesterday morning was close, closer then it should have been. I'm allowing Will too much of me. I said I wouldn't do this to him and now I can't stop. The restraint to pull myself off of him yesterday was barely there, I want him, but I know I can't have him.

I had barely finished with Kenzie when Hank started pounding on my door.

"Mason! You idiot! Open the door!"

I'm annoyed and confused as shit, Hank knows I have a girl over. When I open the door I'm genuinely surprised to find Hank looking at me the way he was. Equal parts angry and pity.

"What Hank? I'm kinda bus..."

He glares into my room "Will was here"

My mouth dries at that "W what?"

He rolls his eyes "Will just left"

I blink shaking my head slowly "why?"

Hank's scoffs "because you have some chick in your bed"

I look at the girl behind me before turning back to Hank "no why was he here?"

Hank shakes his head "I don't know Mason he's your boyfriend!"

My mouth drops open and he continues "or was anyway"

With that Hank turns and walks back to his room leaving me standing with my mouth hanging open and my thoughts going a mile a minute.

I turn to Kenzie "you need to leave"

She blinks "what? It's like 2 in the morning Mason"

I nod "just piss off Kacy!"

I use the wrong name on purpose knowing she'll want to leave after that. It's a shitty move, but I need her gone.

She stand huffing "it's Kenzie!"

I roll my eyes as she stalks out of the room and watch her go before rushing to Hanks door. I walk in without knocking.

"Will's not my boyfriend"

Hank looks up from his spot on his bed "we'll then your more of an idiot then I originally thought"

I blink at him "what the fuck Hank?!"

He sighs "Mason, you must think I'm pretty stupid if you thought I wouldn't notice how you and Will just happen to spend sooo many nights together. Not to mention you were pretty pissed I woke the two of you up the other morning especially for a guy who was supposedly just comforting a friend"

I wince "we're not..dating"

Hank shakes his head "yeah I got that, why are sleeping with him if you don't want him Mason?"

I flinch at that, I do want him. I want him more then anything in my entire life, but he's my forbidden fruit the only fucking thing I can't have.

Hank shakes his head scoffing taking my silence as an answer "it's not fair to Will he could get someone better you know"

I glare at that "I know" and that's what he deserves, something better.

I leave Hank's room and slam my own door closed. I lay down on my bed, but immediately scrunch up my nose. I hate the way it smells, like Kenzie and not Will.

I look around for my shirt, the one I wore with Will, the one that smells like him, but I can't find it. When my eyes land on Kenzie's shirt I curse "fuck me" she must have worn it home. That makes me angry, that was the only shirt I had that smells like him.

I swing my door open and call out to Hank "I'm going out"

He doesn't bother responding and I head downstairs glancing over at the couch and noting that Shawn isn't home.

I get on my bike and drive to Will's house not even bothering to park at the park. I rush upstairs with minimal stealth and open Will's door quickly. The soft thud it makes as it hits the wall only deepens the feeling of dread when I realize, he's not here.

I stare at his empty bed for a moment before walking toward it and falling face first into it, exhausted. I don't bother to strip down instead I just let Will's scent fill my nostrils as I fall asleep wishing I could stay here like this surrounded by Will forever.

••

When I wake up it's to a loud "what the fuck?!"

Groaning I turn over and find Gage standing in the door I sit up my head aching and look around quickly realizing I'm in Will's room.

I look at Gage who lifts a brow "why the fuck are you in Will's room?"

I shake my head slowly and decide to play dumb "I don't fucking know"

Gage blinks at me "did you get fucked up last night?"

I shrug "maybe...where's Will?"

Gage gawks at me "you don't know?!"

I shake my head groaning "no"

Gage starts to look worried "okay whatever get up we gotta go get Jenna he's probably with her!"

I nod and stand groaning "Tylenol?"

Gage rolls his eyes "I have some in my glove box let's go!"

I nod and follow him back downstairs and out to the car thankful his parents are both in the kitchen and don't notice where I came from.

When we get to the car I root around in the glovebox until I find an almost empty bottle of Tylenol.

I swallow two and Gage gives me a look "are you sure your okay?"

I nod "just fucking peachy"

Gage makes a face at that, but we pull up to Jenna's. My face pales when she comes out alone.

She pulls the car door open climbing in and tilts her head looking at us "where's Will?"

Gage curses "fuck he's not with you?!"

Jenna lifts a brow shaking her head "nooo..what happened?"

Her gaze shifts to me and I look away as Gage speaks "he wasn't in his bed this morning"

He looks at me and I cringe, but don't respond.

Jenna immediately grabs her phone and starts typing. She looks frantic for a few moments before she finally sighs "he'll meet us at school"

Gage nods "where the fuck is he?"

Jenna shrugs "he didn't say"

I look out the window, my stomach turning as guilt eats away at me.

We get to school and Gage practically charges into the building. He stops at Will's locker and despite Will not being there yet doesn't move.

"He's got a lot of fucking explaining to do!"

I shift my jaw and stand next to him with my arms crosses leaning against his locker. Jenna stays also only walking across the hall to put her own stuff away.

A few minutes later Gage looks up and I follow his gaze finding Will walking toward us with Austin by his side. I clench my fists was he with Austin last night? Did they...do something?!

I can't help the way my blood begins to boil at the thought, it only gets worse when Jenna points out Will's attire

"those aren't Will's clothes"

I scan his body and fume at the clothes hanging off of him. My eyes dart to Austin and I glare hard.

They get to us and Austin looks confused "um hey guys"

Gage ignores him and glares at Will "where the fuck were you last night?!"

Austin looks surprised and turns to Will who sighs "i was at a friends"

Gage glares at Austin and Will's eyes widen.

"well thanks for walking with me Austin! Nice bumping into you on my way in"

He gives Gage a pointed look as if to say leave Austin alone, but it only confuses me more if he wasn't with Austin who was he with?

Austin chuckles awkwardly before nodding and giving us all a tight lipped smile "uh see you guys around"

Once he's gone Gage crosses his arms "what friend Will?!"

Will makes a face "just a friend Gage"

Gage shakes his head "no. You don't get to bullshit me. Not when I woke up to find you gone this morning and fucking Mason in your bed!"

I tense at that and don't meet Will's eyes although I feel them on me. Will scoffs lightly and I clench my jaw; he's angry.

Gage throws his hands up "Will, where the hell were you?!"

He rolls his eyes "I was at Kade's okay?!"

Gage pauses "oh...uh okay"

My entire body goes ridged at his words. He was at Kade's. That's worse then Austin's, I know he's done stuff with Kade. Did he do stuff last night?

I look up, and he drops his gaze to the ground making me angry, but I have no right to be and that makes me feel worse.

I grunt "I'm going to class" and turn taking long strides away from them.

I don't stop until I've made it to the weight room and although I shouldn't be in here alone I start hitting the machines hard. I'm sweating heavily when Gage shows up at the door.

"What the fuck are you doing?"

I grunt "working off some steam"

Gage lifts a brow "Mason.."

I roll my eyes "I'm just having a shitty time at home okay?! Then some fucker came into the bar and pissed me off the other night" and your brother slept in someone else's bed!

Gage sighs "okay man...you want to talk about it?"

I shake my head "nah, I just want to forget about it"

Gage nods "alright just think after today we'll be on the lake for the weekend!"

I grimace at that "yeah can't wait"

Gage nods "alright cool, take it easy then man I worry about you"

I force a chuckle "yeah okay"

I get up off the machine I'm on just as the bell rings and tell Gage I'm going to hit the showers before skipping the rest of the day. He offers to come with me, but I let him know I'm going to pick up a shift at work so there's really no point.

Gage agrees to at least driving me to work and I let him knowing I shouldn't keep worrying him.

When we get to the bar Gage looks over at me "you'd tell me if something was really wrong right?"

He pauses and looks out the windshield awkwardly "I just...between you and Will I feel like no ones telling me anything or like I'm missing something"

I cringe at that, but quickly shake my head "Gage you're my best friend, and your Will's brother I'm sure he's just got stuff going on"

I hate lying to Gage and I feel like an even bigger ass because the "stuff" Will has going on is because of me.

Thankfully Gage sighs "your right I just worry about him, and you"

I shrug "I'm good man, just a rough night and morning"

He nods "alright text me if you want me to pick you up later"

I nod "sure thing"

I close Gage's door and he drives away. I turn and head into the bar walking behind it and nodding to the few patrons sitting around.

I find Gary in the back office "can I work up front?"

He looks up slowly and lifts a brow "shouldn't you be in school?"

I grunt "shouldn't you mind your buisness?"

He sighs shaking his head "Mason. I care about you. You've been off the last little while and I don't want to see you fall off the deep end"

I glare, but I'm not mad at him I'm mad at myself. I got myself into this fucked up mess with Will and now I'm too fucking attached to get myself out.

"Okay. Your right. I'm just dealing with some shit"

He nods slowly "this shit have anything to do with Will?"

I shift my jaw "leave it alone Gary"

He gives me a pointed look and that's all it takes.

I sigh dropping into the chair across from him "it's fucked up"

He lifts a brow turning a paper in front of him "explain"

I groan "I fuck...I keep fucking up"

He chuckles "that part was kind of inferred"

I roll my eyes "fine whatever, I...I started sleeping in Will's bed"

He looks up at that and tilts his head slightly "sleeping?"

I nod "yeah. Only sleeping, I didn't want it to become anything else"

Gary looks as if he's processing my words and likely due to my track record with the beds I keep warm he seems confused.

"Why not?"

I shrug "Will is different. He's Gage's brother for one thing, but it's not just that. I don't sleep with people like Will"

Gary rolls his eyes "virgins?"

I scoff "that's not what I meant. He's just...innocent and I don't fucking know, sweet?"

Gary nods slowly "so you don't want to sleep with him because he's a nice guy?"

I grimace "I don't know fuck. I just don't want to ruin him"

Gary lifts a brow as if I've finally said something that makes sense to him.

"Ruin him?"

I groan "tell me what part of me and my life isn't fucked up Gary? I don't want to pull Will into that, but I can't just sleep with him either"

Gary sighs "you're not fucked up Mason you've just been dealt a fucked up hand"

I shrug "what difference does it make? Will is fucking..perfect"

Gary looks surprised at that and I cringe. I don't mean to sound like some sap, but I can't think of another way to describe him.

Gary shakes his head "what does Will think of all this?"

I shift anxiously because my mind drifts to Will's actions the other morning. Will wants me to fuck him?...I think, but wha does he think this is? What does he expect?

I grumble "he goes along with me I guess"

Gary makes a face "what does that mean?"

I shrug "if I go over he lets me stay, if I...make a move he lets me.."

Gary leans back and crosses his arms "it sounds like he likes you, but he's relying on you to show him what this is"

I grunt "I don't fucking know what it is"

He sighs "you need to figure it out or stop what your doing with Will it's not fair to him"

I clench my jaw and stand abruptly "I'll be out front"

Gary shakes his head as I leave, but I ignore it. End it with Will? It'a the easiest option, no it's my only option. I'm not good for him. I don't deserve him, and he doesn't deserve a fucking man whore with a fucked up father.

He deserves someone better, much better.

••

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