"How did you even contact Kevin? I wasn't aware of you exchanging numbers." That was the part I didn't understand. Kevin would've told me if he was talking to any of the guys, wouldn't he?

"Yeah, about that...I got his phone number that one time when I picked you up from work. He gave it to me in case you needed something and wanted me to have a way of contacting him. He's pretty protective of you, you know." Callan's eyes told me he hadn't decided if it was a good thing Kevin was so protective or if there was any competition between them.

"He's kind of like my brother. I'm just as protective of him," I admitted. The truth was, given the shit Kevin had gone through with his family, it only made me want to shield him from as much hurt as I could. It seemed it went both ways.

Callan nodded in understanding. "Anyway, today was the first time I called him. And don't be mad at him for not telling you. I wanted to surprise you."

My stomach growled, and I let out an awkward laugh. "Well, I hope your surprise includes food because I'm starving."

The food was, in fact, included. When we got to Callan's apartment, the smell of chicken made my mouth water. It turned out to be a chicken salad with delicious croutons mixed in, and while I wasn't typically a salad lover, this was perfect. Maybe I'd just been the one making salad wrong. I'd have to ask Margareta for the recipe next time I saw her.

"How's your day been?" I asked after the last bite. I felt full and relaxed. It was great to put some weight off of my feet.

"It's been good. Got some work done and looked forward to see you. God, I've missed you." His words made me blush.

"I've missed you too," I echoed. I hadn't seen him for nearly a week, and it was wonderful being in his company again.

"Did you guys cook together yesterday?" He asked it innocently, but his eyes showed that there was more to the question than that.

"Mhm." I nodded with a soft smile. "It was fun. We made stir fry, and he taught me how to cut an onion. Did you know that the root of the onion is what makes you cry so much?" He shook his head at my question. "I mean, it still stung, but not as bad as I'm used to. It's crazy. But yeah, he's actually a pretty good teacher."

Something like joy flitted across his face as if hearing how much I enjoyed being with his friend made him happy.

Callan's phone rang and cut off the conversation. Looking at the screen, he answered. "This is Cross speaking." A moment of silence before he said, "I've been expecting them, send them up."

"Who's coming?" I asked when he put his phone back in his pocket. Was this a part of the surprise he had talked about earlier?

"You'll see." He smirked and got up to clear the table. I helped him wash off the plates while he put them in the dishwasher; all the while I was jittery and nervous, not knowing who would show up.

Just as we were done cleaning up, the elevator chimed, and I tensed. Callan walked up behind me as I looked towards the entryway. From the kitchen, I could see the living room and the opening to the entry clearly.

"Relax, I promise this is something you will like," he whispered and then dragged my earlobe between his teeth, making me shudder from the sensation. "Wait here, and I'll go get them," Callan said and walked off to the elevator. Seconds later, he came back with an elderly woman and a man. The latter was carrying a giant black bag in one hand and a smaller one in the other.

"Follow me, and I'll show you where you can put it up." I could hear Callan say before they vanished down the hallway. I stood still, puzzled at what was happening, but luckily, I didn't need to wonder long.

After a couple of minutes, Callan returned to me and answered the question clearly written on my face. "Chen, the woman you just saw, is a professional masseuse. She'll be giving you a full-body Shiatsu massage for an hour and a half," he explained, and with each word, my eyes widened. "That's why I called Kevin earlier. I wanted to know which shape you were in, so I could plan our night accordingly."

The thoughtfulness behind Callan's gesture made me unable to protest to him spending money on me. It was the sweetest thing that he had planned the night around my needs.

"I'll admit," Callan continued, "I wanted to give you the full-body massage myself. Though at this moment, I can tell you need the relaxation, and I won't be able to control myself if I first got my hands on your naked body." His voice dropped to a husky tone, and my mind took me places that made me press my thighs together. I definitely wouldn't mind him being the one giving me that massage and possibly get a happy ending as well. Damn, I needed to stop thinking about it, or else I would give that poor woman signals I really wouldn't want to give.

Callan looked at me expectantly, waiting for my reaction. I smiled as I rosed on my toes and gave him a kiss. "Thank you," I whispered sincerely against his lips. Just as I was pulling back, he growled and twisted his hand in my hair, forcing me back to him.

He attacked my lips with an intensity that had me moaning in heady joy. There was something about the way he took control of me that made me dizzy with need.

I'd never known why I wanted to submit in the first place, but these men made it feel glorious, as if this was what I was meant to do.

A cough behind Callan broke us apart. Almost guilty, as if we'd been caught, I turned to the man standing just outside the kitchen.

"It's...eh... It's all set up in the room. I'll be back to get the equipment when you're done with your appointment," the man informed us. He looked flustered, but I was sure I looked even worse. With a few words exchanged with Callan, the man left us alone.

"You're welcome, Bella," Callan said back to me, picking up our conversation. "Come on, I'll show you which room it's at."

I followed Callan down the hall and stopped beside a door I hadn't been in before. With a chaste kiss, he sent me inside.

The room was a guest room, but still with plenty of space to have, say...a massage table. I couldn't tell whose room it was–if it was Mateo's or Gideon's–since the only scent in here now was some type of oil.

Calming music came from a small, portable speaker, setting the relaxing tone in the room. Candles were burning, and the lights were dimmed.

"Hi," I greeted the kind-looking woman.

"Hello, Mrs. Cross. I'm Chen, your masseuse for today," Chen introduced herself.

"I–I'm... I'm not...eh," I stammered, trying to explain to her that I wasn't married to Callan. Just the suggestion of it made my heart race. "We're not married," I finally said as I collected myself.

"Oh, I'm sorry, my mistake. Have you ever had a shiatsu massage before?" Chen asked calmly as if she hadn't made me so flustered I'd forgotten to speak.

"No, I haven't had a...what did you call it? Shiatsu massage?"

"Yes. Shiatsu is a type of massage that helps balance your body and release tension," she explained. "Now, if you could undress and lay down on the table on your stomach, I'll back in a couple of minutes so we can start. There are paper briefs for you on the bed if you want to use them." Nodding, I looked towards the bed, confirming that paper panties were lying there. She gave me a couple of more instructions before she left the room.

The aches in my body made themselves known, going from numbness to painful throbbing as if the mention of getting it alleviated made me more aware of them. God, it sounded like heaven to get rid of it. I'd never experienced a professional massage before. The closest I'd gotten to it was last Sunday, on the couch with Callan and Gideon.

Undressing, I left my own panties on and grabbed the paper ones to put over over them as well. I climbed up on the table and laid down on my stomach, using the towel she'd left for me to cover up my ass.

It didn't take long until Chen was back. She'd waited just long enough to be sure I was covered up properly.

"Let's begin. We'll start with your upper back, and work our way through," she informed me.

I jumped slightly from warm oil being poured on my upper back. It didn't burn. In fact, it was quite pleasant; I just hadn't been prepared for it.

As she started, all I could do was enjoy the feeling of getting some proper care for my stiff muscles. It was, perhaps, the most fantastic and heavenly thing I'd ever experienced–aside from being with my men.

I felt so spoiled as I sunk deep into relaxation. The music lulling me to a calm state of mind, and I couldn't grasp any thoughts but how sweet Callan was for arranging this for me. He'd wanted me to accept that they wanted to take care of me, and I felt that little by little, I was starting to.

Since I could remember, I'd been independent. However, I was gradually learning that I could still be independent while also being taken care of. Just like one could be a feminist but still want to submit to a man. It didn't have to be one or the other.

Balance.

As long as I didn't have to give up that part of me–as long as I didn't become too dependent on them–what was actually the problem?