《Yes, Sirs (Book 1 of Desire's Den)》Chapter 58 - Emma
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My pussy clenched at his words, even as my body tensed with nerves. I'd done only a couple of blowjobs in my life, and let's just say the receivers didn't like what I'd given them.
One-night stands could be fun with the right people, probably–I wouldn't know. I'd always been unlucky with who I'd ended up going home with. More often than not–which meant always–I went home with jerks; the ones who saw it as expected that the girls would go down on the boys but wouldn't return the favor. The jerks were the ones who had no problem complaining about what other girls did wrong in bed, ruining someone's self-esteem.
Kevin had asked me why I'd gone home with douchebags, but the thing was, they'd all been so charming until they weren't. I was a horrible judge of character, not seeing when someone was playing me. These guys, though? They weren't anything like those jerks; I just knew it.
I think that...even if I had some interest in BDSM when I found out what it was, another part of me craved it as soon as I had my self-esteem broken. Having a dominant meant I could let go of my thoughts and worries. I could stop overthinking about what I should do or if I was good enough in bed. With a dom, I would have it all taken away, and all that would be left were orders and demands and guidance when I needed a helping hand. It was safe when all I'd ever been met with were scornful comments of everything I did wrong or did poorly.
"What is it?" Mateo asked, reading my emotions expressed on my face.
"Please don't..." I shook my head. This was supposed to be "sexy time" and not whatever I'd created with my insecurities.
"Don't what?" Gorgeous, you have to talk to me. The relationship between a dom and his submissive only works with trust and open communication. Talk to me," he urged me, and I could see how much he wanted me to let him in.
He's not like those boys, I reminded myself.
Taking a deep breath, I told him about what worried me. Even if I knew deep down that Mateo was far from being like one of those jerks, it didn't change the fact that I had issues; with myself and my insecurities brought on by others' hateful words. "Please don't be mean. I probably suck at blowjobs, no pun intended." I forced out a smile. "There's been a couple of guys who've said...they've said I was the worst to give blowjobs of anyone they'd met."
"Honey, those were boys who knew the power of words. People like that, I can guarantee you they've said the exact same thing to many other girls. They like to bring others down. I know for a fact that you don't suck–" he smiled "–pun intended. Do you want to know how I know that?"
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I nodded.
"Because I can see it in the way you move. You have this sensuality about you that I haven't seen in anyone else. If you can be that sensuous in public, I know you're even more so in bed. Sure, you might not have much practice sucking cock, but you're eager to learn, and that's the best quality anyone can have in bed. You haven't had the opportunity or the right partner to learn, but we're here to teach you what you cannot be taught on your own."
It made sense what he said, especially that part where I haven't had the opportunity to learn. I'd been scared to mention anything because stuff like this was usually hard for me to talk about. I knew that we needed to have an open dialogue, as Mateo had said, but talking about my sexual skills, or lack thereof? That was tough for me.
"Do you want to be taught?" He asked next.
If I wanted to? Of course, I did. It just wasn't easy to shake off the words spoken by other men. I guess I just needed the right man–or men– to help me get over it and become more self-assured.
"Yes, Sir." I nodded adamantly. I felt safe with all three of my dominants, and I didn't think they would ever stoop so low and judge me for what I didn't know. I was confident they would do the opposite instead and build me up.
"That pleases me, Gorgeous." He stroked my cheek before pulling his hand away. "Unzip me." The soft voice of him once again turned back to something harsher–something with more power.
My hands shook a little as I opened the top button of his pants and grabbed the zipper, dragging it down slowly. He didn't comment on my nervousness and instead stayed calm and supportive.
I almost forgot about my nerves when I saw he'd gone commando. Holy shit, I didn't know anyone did that.
"That's it. Now, take my dick out." He continued staying calm and collected while I did as he asked. He let out his breath when I gripped his length and freed it from its confinement. Seriously, what was it about these men and big dicks? I hadn't seen Gideon's yet, but I hoped he's would be smaller. A girl could hope, right? God...I was probably one of the few women hoping for smaller dicks. Sure, big dicks were hot as hell, but I mean, come on, how would I even manage with one, let alone two fucking me with their girth and length?
Mateo was obviously turned on, and fuck if that didn't get my juices going. Just seeing him, hard for me, made me even more aroused than I was just a second ago.
His shaft felt soft and smooth, yet firm in my hand. I caught myself staring. I hadn't seen a dick before unless the lights were off, and those times I hadn't been able to see anything at all but a shape in the darkness. My fingertips touched each other as I held it, but just barely. It was veiny and angry red. I saw the pre-cum leaking from the tip, and my eyes trailed the drops as they slid down his length. Unable to stop myself, I leaned forward and licked the pre-cum, curious about what he would taste like. It held a salty tang and was a bit...sweet.
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Huh, I'd never come across anyone that tasted sweet. Bitter? Yeah, that was more the case with the other men.
Mateo groaned as I licked the tip. "Fuck, that's good, Gorgeous. Try to push your tongue on my slit," he suggested.
I tried it out, and I loved the reaction I was getting from him. It made me want to try something else–to experiment and see what he liked and didn't. I wanted to know his body the way he seemed to know mine.
After those boys had talked badly about my skills, I'd googled how to become better at oral sex. It wasn't something I'd had the opportunity to test out, but I wanted to rock Mateo's world like he'd done mine. It was time for payback–of the good kind.
Leaning back, I spit on my hands to make them wet and gripped his shaft once again. Stroking slightly, I licked his length where I could before taking him into my mouth. His moans kept me going and let me know I was doing something he liked. He wasn't afraid or held anything back as he expressed his pleasure, I thought a part of it was for my benefit.
I took him in as far as I could without gagging and stroked him in tact with my mouth. I remembered reading something about rolling my tongue and using it actively while giving a blowjob.
"Shit," Mateo groaned. "It feels so fucking good, Gorgeous."
I preened at his compliment. I started feeling even safer with Mateo, like I could experiment without any judgment. There was just something about him that made me comfortable. I'd never found giving a blowjob to anyone else a turn on, and I'd definitely not enjoyed it before.
My pussy tightened in desperation. Pleasuring Mateo made me so horny I could hardly stand it. If the guys felt even half of this when they were getting me off, I didn't know how they'd been able to wait this long.
Did finger-fucking me and eating me out made them as turned on as I was feeling now?
What would it feel like if I had someone fucking me from behind while another was fucking my mouth? I thought and shocked myself when that thought registered. I was even more shocked at how excited I was to find out the answer.
Mateo placed a hand on my head and tightened his hold. He didn't try to push me, though, or control me. "Is that okay?" he asked; his question ended with a groan when I sucked hard on his dick.
I made a sound of consent.
"Holy fuck, Gorgeous, just like that. Massage my balls with your free hand," he commanded, putting more force in his voice, and God, that was hot.
Rolling one of his testicles in one hand, I jacked him off with the other, all while I licked and sucked his cock.
With the noises he made of pleasure, a part of my self-esteem rebuilt. I felt myself get more secure in my movements and stopped overthinking. His pleasure wasn't just for him anymore; it was for me too. I could feel the wetness leaking from my sex, and my clit pounded angrily, demanding touch.
I'd never felt this sexy before, and I didn't want to let that feeling go.
His taste was intoxicating and growing more addictive by the second.
Mateo started thrusting into my mouth as his groans grew louder like he couldn't control himself. "You should have seen yourself now, so fucking hot taking that dick in your mouth. Your lips are stretched around my cock, like a good, slutty princess."
I moaned around his shaft, loving the dirty talk and begging for more. Mateo answered my wishes.
"Do you like that? Do you like me fucking your mouth?" he asked. His voice was rough and husky and so sexy.
Nodding as much as I could, I let him know just how much I liked it. I grabbed his hand and told him without words what I wanted him to do– what I craved for him to do; to take control.
"Look up, gorgeous. Look at me while I fuck your mouth," Mateo ordered, and I obeyed.
His eyes were dark and intense, and they were focused entirely on me. He sped up, fucking me harder and faster. I gagged a little when his cock hit the back of my throat, and my eyes watered.
"So fucking good," he murmured. "Pinch me if it becomes too much, gorgeous."
I moaned around his dick in answer. He was hot like this, taking control of my body and using me for his own pleasure.
"Breath through your nose," he directed as he kept fucking me, and I tried to do just that. It was hard at first, but I didn't panic because I knew he would pull out if it became too much, like he'd said he would.
His balls were pulled tight in my hands. I rolled them carefully, massaging them a little.
"Fuck!" Mateo pulled himself out of my mouth, breathing heavily and looking at me like I was something special.
He grabbed my chin and tilted my head further up, and pressed a hard kiss to my lips.
"Why did you stop?" I asked when he leaned back.
"I would've come if you continued. We couldn't have that, could we? I need that pussy of yours first," he smiled cheekily.
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