'I'll go looking for you to Neverland,

Following Tinkerbell, sent by the memories,

There, you and I are smiling at each other.

I am your eternal Peter Pan.

Your man who has stopped in time,

I may be clumsy, but I loved you so much,

And I will run to you.'

- Exo -Peter Pan

Jude felt it the second it hit him.

Like a fucking bullet to his chest, without any warning.

He felt as if his insides went on a joyride and had briefly forgotten the rest of his body behind. He was stargazing, watching the little lights twinkle but his eyes kept returning to the moon. His inner beast liked the luminescence of the clear sphere. They had a connection. Every time he morphed; his wolf instantly gravitated to the ball of light that remained pinned in the sky. Sometimes, he'd greet it like an old friend. Sometimes, he would acknowledge it with a quiet prayer.

Tonight, he did neither.

Something was happening. He could feel it settling deep into the marrow of his bones.

He wasn't prepared when his body jerked so violently, he felt as if his bones were jarred from a rough landing. He heard the echo of his wolf inside his head, tearing through his own inner thoughts. He tried to calm the more animalistic side of him, but the wolf didn't want to be tamed in that moment.

It was uncaged and raging.

He was searching for something.

He felt like he'd lose his breath if he didn't find what he was looking for soon.

Find. Find. Find her. Her. Find. Her. Mine.

The mantra was incessant, pounding in his head.

With his heart pounding loudly against his ribcage, his wolf kept clawing at his thoughts in restless determination.

And then he caught the waft of the most amazing scent that ever graced his senses- fucking wild peaches.

His head whipped to the side, catching the source.

He stumbled.

He never stumbled.

Ever since he could use his two feet, he'd been trained- not taught- trained to walk like he was constantly under an enemy's watchful scrutiny. Hence, he avoided rubbing into bushes, stepping on things that would cause an echo and even go as far as slowing down which he despised but if it meant you'd be undetected, he slowed his pace.

Tonight, he felt uncoordinated with his limbs.

He'd stumbled.

He and his wolf were agile on their feet. He didn't lose his footing.

But he did and he was staring at the reason why.

There.

Right below the luminescent radiance of the moon's silver cast was the Recruit. He knew her name, but he refused to say it since she was a mere Recruit. It was strictly decorum. There were rules he had to uphold, and both dictated that no Recruit, especially a non-Shadow Hunter was to be addressed with their first name.

She was a mere Recruit.

Yet, it didn't matter a single bit in that moment. All that shit hammered into his head since birth didn't matter. For once, he forgot everything. Just this once, he forgot everything and focused on the rhythmic beat of his heart.

Thump. Thump. Thump.

Glowing under the silver shadow of the moon, she left him completely breathless. She looked like a damn fairy in the midst of taking off. If she began sprinkling glitter around, he found that it wouldn't surprise him.

He felt greedy absorbing all that she was. Fuck, she was beautiful. Her black-blue hair gently tousled in the wind. Her eyes troubled, facing him. Those eyes, a brilliant mingle of blue and green and adorned by the longest lashes he'd ever seen.

Fuck.

The moment he caught sight of her, he had warned Seamus and Jamison that no one in the Pack would touch her. A pretty face like hers was bound to attract the unmated males in his Pack. He'd caught a fair amount of males already drooling after her. He didn't want trouble in his Pack and demanded his Enforcers to ensure that not one single male would lay a finger on her. She gravitated attention with the way she moved- legs strutting, ass swaying, hair swinging.

Yeah, the boys in his Pack were hooked.

It was unbelievably irritating that she had no idea of the chaos she was causing among his Pack.

He heard the gossip and he made sure Jamison kept her in line. Their pairing had been intentional. He trusted Jamison to keep her in line but also away from the pussy-chasing hooligans in his Pack.

He didn't want his men being led astray by some chick who looked like she belonged on some glossy magazine, flicking her hair about.

Yet that didn't matter.

Not when he could hear his blood rushing through his veins, it seemed like he was back at Niagara Falls, listening to the loud rushing waters crashing violently against the edge of the cliff.

His fingers pressed against his chest. It was still pounding. Hard.

He blinked once...twice and he no longer found himself in the forest encapsulated by towering trees.

He was drowning in an endless sea of images and only came up for air when a scene unfolded of a colourful sunset.

He was standing on a balcony. Not alone. There was someone else there, holding his hand tightly. He too was holding the hand firmly but also protectively. He was surprised by the complete devotion and protectiveness he felt. He'd forgotten how the simple, yet affectionate contact felt like since the last person who held his hand was his mum. This hand felt familiar as his own, just softer, and smaller where his whole fist could wrap around it. From his peripheral, there was a flash of sleek raven hair.

It was strange. He felt none of his shields or walls up. He felt safe. Protected. Satisfied.

He felt fucking cherished it caused a layer of emotion to settle in his throat.

He couldn't remember the last time he felt that.

"I love you, Jude." The words were quiet, but his heart felt it loud and clear, it burned deep.

His throat tightened as he whispered back the same reply into the wind, and he did this freely.

Right there, breathing in the crisp air and holding onto the mysterious hand like a lifeline, he was wrapped with love.

The scene wasn't from his collection of memories. He would've remembered something like this. There was no faking the type of beauty of it. Whatever it was, he was drowning in it.

The scene abruptly closed, and another one formed.

He was laying on a bed, feeling so warm and contented like he was at the top of the world. He was stark naked and laying on his chest was a cascade of murky, obsidian hair that felt like silk upon his heated skin. The scent of peaches was there, lingering in the room, on the bedsheets and on his skin like a tattoo. He had no control of his emotions or actions as he found himself caressing the soft cheek of the woman laying atop of him. There was a gold band on his left hand and another on the woman's hand, matching his own.

"Jude? Why are you still awake?" The voice was distorted, it sounded far away under layers and layers of water.

"Sleep."

"So bossy."

"Sleep."

"Fine baby. You sleep too."

"Stubborn little thing."

"I can still hear you."

"Sleep."

"Mmm."

There too, upon the bed with his limbs tangled with the woman, he was filled to the brim with love he could swear it could burst right from his chest.

The scene shuttered to a close and he found himself inside a kitchen chasing something. It wasn't like his usual hunting where he was determined to decapitate something.

He was playing.

That startled him.

He was also grinning wide. He could feel his lips stretched wide, it ached.

There was a burst of stifled giggles to the left and he lunged in that direction, grabbing something wrapped in a purple tutu.

"Daddy! No!" The girl squealed in delight. "Lala h-help me!" She half-shouted half-giggled in his arms, thrashing about.

There suddenly was a weight on him, tackling him to the floor. The air left him as he stared into a small face identical to his own, except these pair of eyes were sparkling in a blue-green shade. "Got you daddy." The boy grinned victoriously; his front teeth gone.

The girl clapping happily, "Yay. Lala saved me."

"My name isn't Lala Haven, it's Silas." The boy argued half-heartedly as he relaxed into his side, tunnelling into his heat in a warm embrace. The boy felt comfortable at his side, like he cuddled him all the time and it was given often and freely.

The little girl plopped onto his other side and wrapped one little arm around his neck and the other around her brother, "Love you Daddy. Love you Lala." She whispered against his stubbled cheek.

"Love you Haven." The boy grumbled reluctantly but still affectionately.

"Love you little flower." He heard himself say gruffly, squeezing the two little bodies to his sides.

Again, he felt the love bursting inside him and flowing everywhere, wrapping him up in a warm cocoon.

He blinked and the scene disappeared into dust. He found himself wanting to remain in that world where he felt loved and cherished. He clawed for the remnants of the scene, but the last vestiges floated away like he just hadn't seen the most beautiful thing or felt such intense beauty, it left an unbearable ache in his chest.

However, he found himself standing in the familiar forest beyond the borders of his Pack- suddenly cold and feeling stranded. His knees felt weak, and he felt vulnerable at what he had just witnessed.

Emotion settled heavily in his chest; he was trembling with it.

He only had a minute to recover when another scene opened. This one he knew with certainty was from his memories. He tried to shut out the scene, but it unfolded and played for him.

He'd almost forgotten the memory. He had only recently turned six and it would only be a few months later when his parents would be killed.

He was crouched low, watching the sea of glowing fireflies in the field with childish rapture. They reminded him of Tinkerbell. To him, they were all Tinkerbell. It was the only reason he woke up in the middle of the night and snuck out in his PJs and sleeping shoes. The moment they all lit up, all fatigue and tiredness faded away from his body.

"Honey, thank the heavens I found you." This voice. It was his mum. He was surprised he recognised her voice cause he'd forgotten how she sounded or looked like. He only had three pictures of her secured in his room and he always had to report to it to remember how she looked.

Seeing her so clearly in his memories, he sucked in a breath and watched the precious memory play out.

She rushed to his side, and he quickly yanked her down, "You're going to make the Tinkerbells go away if you're noisy. Look, they're losing their glow because they're scared now."

"Sorry baby, I didn't mean to scare them away." His mum whispered, crouching beside him.

"It's okay. They'll glow again."

And they did.

One firefly drifted to them and landed on his opened palm. He was beaming and his mum was smiling one of those soft smiles. It was the smile his dad liked. Apparently, he had his mum's smile too. He liked that he had a little piece of his mum since he looked identical to his dad. That's why he always grinned.

"I have a Tinkerbell." He said quietly.

"You do. Be careful with her. You gotta handle her with care Honey. You can squish her if you're not careful with her."

"I don't wanna squish her."

"Easy. Just stay very still and let her be free. Don't cage her in. She'll get scared. Just be careful and let Tinkerbell know you won't hurt her."

"Okay."

Together, they stayed outside until sunrise. He was getting tired and eventually curled into his mum's side. She smelt like home. It wasn't long before he felt his eyelids go heavy and he felt himself being lifted into a warm chest. He knew straight away it was his dad. He could smell the leather on him. He heard his parents speak in whispers and felt someone kiss him on his cheek. He was too tired to slap them away though.

The last thing he heard his parents say before his dad tucked him to bed were admissions of love. He could still clearly recall the gruff way his dad always whispered his love for him against his cheek.

It was right then as a six-year-old, secured in his dad's arms he promised himself he'd find his own Tinkerbell to love.

The scene closed slowly, and he barely held himself up from hearing his parents voices so clearly in his head.

He took one last glance of the moon and breathed deep. His lungs filled with the fragrance of wild peaches.

He angled his head to the side and found those green-blue eyes in the sea of black.

It seemed like he didn't need to look far to find his Tinkerbell.