Nyx's pov

Guilt had never eaten me up this much, the first time I ever felt this way was when my now late father had constantly reminded me that I was the cause of my mother's death. She had died bearing me and now, all pack members made an effort to taunt me about how I was the cause of my father's death.

It's been weeks since Alpha Titan had snapped his neck killing him, weeks since I was left outside on the open grounds to mourn my loss, weeks since I had been beating myself up and being distant from everyone, including Amara, Hera, and myself.

Hera was in a state of mourning too. Even though she had hated him for putting us through shit, he was still our father and she felt a sense of grief knowing that he was gone.

Amara didn't know what was going on, it didn't affect her that her grandfather had died. He had been a total stranger to her and he barely even recalled her name, she only knew she had a dead grandma.

My fingers felt numb from kneading the flour repeatedly, the pack members had suddenly stated that they desired British meat pies today and scones after tossing away the mouth-watering pancakes I had made. Well, it was their loss, I would pick up the pancakes later for my daughter and me to eat.

I tried focusing on making the dough to perfection and not letting grief and sadness distract me.

I got my hands off the dough and turned to the cooker only to see that the filling for the meat pies that I had been preparing was burning. I quickly put off the cooker and in panic, I picked up the hot pot, it burned my hands and I dropped the pot immediately. It fell to the ground with a clank spilling its contents on the floor

I felt a harsh blow dealt on my back sending me to the ground, my face hit the burnt pot as I fell and I screamed in agony as I felt my face burn.

The pain was searing.

"You bitch!" A hand grabbed my hair pulling me up, "What the fuck is wrong with you?"

It was the Beta's mate, Nora. Another person who made an effort in ensuring that my life was miserable and it seemed her cruelty only heightened with her pregnancy.

"Apart from spreading your legs, what else are you good at?" She hissed, "Burning meat pie fillings?"

"Let me go, Nora." I struggled to try to pull her hands off me but my efforts were in vain. She slapped me across the face again where my skin had burnt.

"How dare you talk to me like that?!" She barked, "Do you know how expensive foodstuff is?" She asked with a dry laugh, "Oh no, you don't! You are so wretched you can't afford shit!" She said to me, "Wait till the Alpha hears of how you wasted and burnt food." She pushed me and I landed on the floor right on the spilled filling.

Let me handle this bitch! Hera growled.

Hera no! I shrieked but it was too late. She force took over and I felt her canines and claws come out.

"Stupid bitch!" She growled before lunging at a very startled and wide-eyed Nora.

Hera pushed her to the ground and was about to claw at her face when she was suddenly thrown off her.

She hit the wall and I whimpered in pain as she howled. I quickly took back control.

The Beta, Carlo was standing before me glaring down at me with furry. I was picked up by as I whimpered submissively overwhelmed by his aura, his arms were around my shoulders gripping them hard as his claws dug into my skin, I could see his eyes glowering, "How dare you hurt my mate?" He boomed.

"I…" My words were halted with a slap across my cheek.

"Oh my God, I think I am bruised." I heard Nora whine as if in pain, "She pushed me so hard, what if the baby is hurt?"

The mention of the baby and whining of his mate seemed to fuel his anger more.

"I will deal with you before the Alpha even gets back." And with these words of his, I was dragged out of the Kitchen and outside the packhouse straight to the torture center for rouges.

"Mummy…mummy…where are you going?" I heard Amara call after me as I was being taken there. She ran from where she had been playing alone and got in our way, "Leave her please."

"Get out of the way mutt!" Beta Carlo growled and kicked my child sending her to fall flat on the ground.

Tears fell freely this time around as I saw her being treated like this, I couldn't even say anything to console her and as he dragged me away, I could still hear her cries.

He pushed me into the enclosed cell-like structure and banged the door shut. I was put on a chair and strapped on it. I wasn't nervous about what punishment he would meet out on me, this wasn't the first time I had been here but with the way his eyes glinted with hate, I was a bit scared of what exactly he was going to do to me.

"When I am done with you." He growled, "You will regret being born." He cracked his knuckles and looked over me for a while and then his lips curled in a smirk, "I don't think we should use the chair." He said and loosened the straps. He grabbed me leading me to what resembled a high jump post with the bar, I could see cuffs with chains dangling from the top bar.

"What are you going to do?" I asked with great fear creeping in me. I had never seen this and it had never been used on me.

"You will see." He said and then he made me stand under it. He took gloves that were laying on a table nearby which also contained different torture tools.

He slipped on the gloves and picked up my right hand, he clamped the cuff to it and I howled in pain as it got clamped around my hand. I knew now why he had worn gloves, the cuffs were made of silver. The second hand was also fastened on the next silver cuff and then he smiled in satisfaction as my face scrunched up in pain. He walked over to where the whips were to get one to begin his torture.

I didn't know which was worse, the whip landing on my back that had silver spikes embedded in it or the burning sensation around my wrist due to the silver cuffs.

I bit back my screams so as not to give him the satisfaction but my pains and his torture increased.

I couldn't take it anymore.

Do you want me to? Hera asked.

Yes, do it, please, I smiled inwardly as I felt the wounds on my back closing, and the blood begins to dry up, Hera was helping me heal and I didn't think the Beta would mind as only Alpha Titan had told me not to heal myself while he punished me.

"Did you just heal yourself?" Beta Carlos growled, "How dare you?" The whip came down but not on my back this time. It landed on my torso whipping across my bosom and I shrieked in pain, "You seem unbreakable uhn?"

He walked over to the table and picked up a syringe, "I will break you!" He stepped back to me and stabbed the syringe in my thigh injecting its contents into my system. I felt my body weaken and my limbs were turning flaccid. It was silver and wolfsbane, another syringe was stabbed in my other thigh and I got the same reaction even worse.

The liquid-filled me weakening my limbs and numbing my senses. I couldn't fight back, I couldn't even feel Hera. He took a knife and stabbed me in my belly causing me to cry out and he twisted it in my guts.

"Let's see you heal yourself now." He laughed heartily before pulling out the knife and moving to my thighs again. He ripped off part of my skirt and began carving out words on my exposed skin. I didn't know what he wrote and I was too filled with pain to try and decipher what he was writing.

I felt blood trickling down my thighs as I struggled to keep my eyes open, my breathing increased and he suddenly stabbed the knife in my thighs again.

"I don't know why you are still kept in this pack." He said taking my jaw between his fingers and jerking my face up, "He should have gotten rid of you a long long time ago."

I had a lot of things to tell him but I bit back my words

"And then you had a child and dared to claim that it was his." He growled, "You and your useless mutt should be thrown out for the rouges to feast on." He said, "Tsk…tsk…tsk…look at you pathetic little fool, no one would want you, you and that bastard mutt of yours. Can't you see you are cursed? What type of man has a child who shifts very early? You are being punished by the moon goddess cause you are a damned weakling."

"Leave my child out of this!" I said weakly, "She has done nothing wrong to you."

"Bold of you to think that you can talk back at me!" He barked slapping me across the face, "Maybe, that's why you are jealous!" He drew a long line down my sides with the knife, "Cause you have a cursed mutt for a child, that's why you want to harm my child and my mate." He stabbed the knife into my sides causing me to yelp.

"Please, Beta Carlo, please…" I had to beg. The pain was way too much for me to bear, "Please, forgive me…"

"Oh now, you can beg?" He grinned, it was a terrifying one, "I think I have had enough with you." He said throwing the knife aside and releasing the cuffs.

I fell to the ground, hitting my head on it and I sobbed.

"Weakling." He hissed kicking me severely, "Make sure you make it back to the packhouse to prepare dinner for everyone and be by Nora's side to attend to her cravings."

He left the torture room and slammed the door hard causing me to jolt. He left me there in my pool of blood and I wondered how I was going to get out.

_________

I ducked as she flung the plate at me and it met with the wall breaking into tiny pieces.

"I don't want that!" She screamed, "It smells fucking bad, hell! It smells as bad as you."

I shivered as she continued hurling insults at me afraid that the Beta will walk in again and punish me for getting his mate mad.

I didn't want that.

I was still bleeding from what he had done today and I ached all over. After I had managed to crawl out of the torture house, I got to the packhouse and straight to the kitchen to prepare dinner amidst taunts and jeers from the pack members about my appearance and talks about why didn't beta end my life and how I shouldn't get blood in their food.

I had successfully prepared their dinner without anyone hitting or choking me and I managed to escape the kitchen and not fall into the hands of warriors who would use me all night as it was a norm with them.

Now, I was standing before Nora as she complained. She had specifically asked for a different dish which I had prepared and now here she was saying that it stunk.

"Go and make me some soup now!" She barked and I immediately struggled to the kitchen to prepare it for her. I finished up quickly and took it to her. She accepted the food and I stood there waiting for her to order me around when she glared at me.

"What are you doing here?"

"I…"

"Get lost!"

I left her room at her words and went back to the kitchen. I finished up the dishes and cleared the mess the pack members had made.

I walked to the basement as I was done for the day, holding messed-up pancakes I had intended to pick earlier. I hadn't seen Amara since I came back from the torture house and I guessed that she would be in the basement playing with fluffy.

I reached my destination and got in. The sight I met made the content in my hands fall to the ground as a shrill cry left my lips.