The machine's beeped rapidly, doctors rushed in and out from the door, the swish of blue gowns and strong smell of disinfectant tainting the air a blur to me. My vision distorted as I pushed through the door. My footsteps echoed in my ears, my heart slowing to a drumming thud in my chest. I weaved through corridors of doctors and patients and people, finally reaching the waiting room, my eyes wide, panting slightly.

People rushed towards me and I let myself be carried in the wave of people, their voice muffled in my ears. Where is April? Was the only thing on my mind. I craned my neck and pushed through people, my eyes falling on a small body being pushed through the hospital double doors, doctors milling around the two oncoming stretchers. April lay motionless on it, her chest barely rising and falling, her skin bruised and bloodied, making her almost unrecognizable. My mouth dropped at the sight of her eyelashes pressed against her cheek, her closed eyes dead from behind – her lips were blue with cold. My heart dropped in my heart, my legs automatically moving to keep up with the stretcher. April...

I barely saw Nina coming in from behind her on a stretcher. Nina's family had arrived but I'd barely noticed them, tears already streaming down their face as they angrily consulted the doctor, their yells filling the small corridor.

"Sorry sir, you need to leave." A doctor addressed me, pushing me out of the way and shouting something at another nurse, which set them all into motion.

"She's not breathing!" I heard a nurse say.

"Get the defibrillator!" The doctor yelled back before bursting into an emergency room, leaving the double doors to slam shut in my face.

- - - ** --- ** -- ** ---- - - ** --- ** -- ** ---

The doctor appeared from the doors after four hours of pure agony. His mask was pulled over his mouth and nose and he slipped it down, revealing a thin mouth pressed into an unhappy line, his thick-framed glasses shielding his small eyes that were currently darting between the many faces in the waiting room.

"Which are immediate family here?" Nina's family and Diego immediately stepped forward and the doctor directed them to another doctor someway off who. The doctor peered up at me and asked. "Who is," he glanced down at his clipboard, "April Evans family here?" I quickly stepped forward and as did Emma and Beau.

"Her family is England, but we've informed them of the situation. They'll be arriving as soon as they can. But we're her family too." Emma interrupted.

The little doctor looked from each of our faces slowly as though judging us carefully for any signs of dishonesty. "Very well."

"How is she?" My voice sounded and I started at hearing it.

"Well Ms Evans is in intensive care and is being prepped for operation." My stomach dropped. "When the car crashed, she was on the left meaning she suffered the full impact of the hit. She sustained several injuries, but the one we're most worried about is the internal bleeding from the impact on the chest area. It's not certain what the outcome of this surgery will be but we'll try our best, you have our word. We'll consult you after the procedure." My heart felt like poison. The doctor – Doctor Ramone I later learned his name was - patted a teary eyed Emma's shoulder with a slight bristle before turning.

He rapidly retreated into theatre, people still rushing around us in a distorted haze, leaving us with open mouths and a feeling of dread washing over us in a united silence.

"Guys, good news. Nina's in surgery right now, she'll be fine!" Diego ran into the room breathlessly, his face a mask of gratitude. I turned away from him not wanting to feel grateful or even happy right now. Anger and worry boiled in my veins. April... No. She can't die on me – she can't. I let out a frustrated cry and slammed my hand onto the wall earning me a few looks from visitors and I glared at them, turning on my heel to exit that fucking waiting room.

After that, people's voices and pats on my back were a blur to me and spun around my head like a brewing hurricane. I took off after that in the night, cigarette and drink in hand – I felt utterly useless – April was on deaths door and was I doing? Nothing. I couldn't do anything and that made me feel like shit. It was my fault – if April... If she... it was my fault.

Then, I glanced down at my hands, at the cigarette and the drink. And I let them fall to the ground.

I slumped down in the hospital seat, rubbing my eyes wearily, a cup of coffee burning my hand. "Aiden? How is she, son?" My head jerked up at the sound of Antonio's voice.

"Well, I don't know, I mean she's still in a fucking coma and hasn't woken up for 2 months now. How do you think she is?" He fell silent at that comment, his dark brown eyes glimmering – I caught him glaring at me but he remained silent and sat down on a seat opposite me, looking completely out of place.

I watched the smoke from the coffee rise in fascination, the delicate swirls of smoke twining around my fingers as I reached out for them. They reminded me of cigarettes – but I'd tried to smoke less, more for April than myself. I blew on the coffee until the tendrils of smoke disappeared and set it down on the table next to me, the dark brown liquid suddenly looking completely unappetizing to me. You have survived on this for nearly a month now, Aiden. Get over it.

"Maybe you should get out for some fresh air. You're looking pale." I glanced up at my father looking down on me, a spark of concern in his eyes.

"I don't need fresh air."

"Aiden," His tone was exasperated now, "You've hardly left April's side these past 2 months – give yourself a break! Go and eat, go and take a walk, go and sleep! You look like a walking zombie. Do you want to look like this when she wakes up?"

"Correction, I look like a walking werewolf." I said with dry amusement. He made as though to say something, but then he shook his head and let out a sigh.

Doctor Ramone emerged from the room and my head jerked up, my coffee spilling slightly as I knocked it with my leg – "What's up?"

"Nothing's changed. As a doctor, I feel I should advice you to go and get some sleep or air - you've been here an awful lot and you look... well you loo-"

I cut him off with a thanks and rushed past the little man who had been April's doctor these past 2 months. I walked into the familiar room, the constant sound of beeping now like the sound of birds to my ears – I approached the bed in the middle of the room and glanced down at the girl lying on the bed, her eyes shut.

April's eyes were lifeless behind those dimmed lids, her lips cracked – she only wore a paper hospital gown, her arms laying either side of the bed. I slumped down in the seat and checked the time before settling in to watch over her like I'd done nearly every day now. Despite being like this, she still looked beautiful in my eyes. Like a sleeping angel waiting on deaths door.

A soft knock sounded from the door and I glanced over with mild surprise. "How is she?" Nina's voice croaked from the doorway. I turned around fully now to look at her and found Diego behind her, hands on her shoulders, his green eyes softening as he looked at April.

"Why is that everyone asks that? She's been asleep for 2 months. I highly doubt she would have got up to get some Mountain Dew." I leaned forward in my seat, clasping my hands together.

She didn't reply but cast her eyes downwards – pale bruises were still visible on her face as she looked downwards, her eyes drawn without the dark makeup she usually had on. "We bought a visitor."

I didn't reply but my eyes widened a fraction at the familiar blonde hair and small, blue eyes that went by the name Kayla. I immediately changed my expression to a scowl. She gave me a small smile and peered inside, her mouth opening an inch as though to say something. That annoying cocky look on her face was gone; she edged into the room as though afraid of the machinery around April's body. The heart monitor beeped steadily next to her and I kept one eye on it and the other on the approaching Kayla. They all kept their voices low, their steps careful as though not wanting to wake her. Idiots.

"Look who decided to return from the dead." I commented dryly, drawing one knee up to rest my arm on it, my eyes fixated on the approaching blonde.

"Aiden." Diego's voice rang warning signs but I ignored it as I observed Kayla. Her eyes glimmered with tears as she stood next to the bed and took April's pale hand, veins protruding from them, in her own lightly tanned one and held it lightly as though afraid it would shatter. The contrast made my chest ache. How could someone look so dead when they were alive. How could someone like April be reduced to something so weak, so fragile, so powerless.

"I'm sorry April," Kayla's voice was nothing more than a whisper, tears streaming down her face now. Nina had moved forward and placed an arm on her shoulder. I cocked my head to one side at the scene and rubbed my neck tiredly.

"She won't be able to hear you like that." Kayla looked up and saw me staring. "She's in a coma, not dead."

At this, they bristled, their bodies turning rigid at my statement. Diego sent me another look and I raised my hands in surrender as though saying I'm-stating-the-obvious.

"Her mom and dad are coming to the hospital now, I thought we should tell you." Nina cleared her throat, her voice low. I let out a sigh and stood up, stretching my limbs. I ran a hand through my hair and bent down, brushing a soft kiss onto April's forehead, my hands automatically smoothing away the loose strands of hair that always seemed to annoy her.

"I'll be back." I whispered in her ear, my jaw tightening with determination.

Just as we were departing the room, April's mom and dad came into view – Melissa and Robert - their faces pale and drawn mirroring my own. They nodded a greeting at me and rushed into the room.

My relationship with them was simple. At first when they arrived from England, they were baffled to see a tall, lean boy sitting by their daughter's bedside day and night, but then someone had kindly explained that me and April were together. They'd accepted that, with slight apprehension, but seemed impressed with my dedication to April.

Thankfully, they weren't the kind of parents to investigate every single aspect of their daughter's boyfriend and instead left me in peace, although Mr Evans was now asking me sly questions like if I had a criminal record or if I did drugs. Subtle Robert – real subtle. The worst part was, I did have those things, well perhaps not the criminal record, but I wasn't exactly a model boyfriend.

Her sister had also arrived, Olivia. I'd spoken to her, but hardly so - it wasn't the time to become friendly with one another; I would wait until April woke up. As far as I could tell, her younger sister was similar to April in many ways with their large, brown eyes and general antics. It almost made me smile at how uncanny they both were.

A small hand reached out on one side of the corridor as I walked and I flinched at the sudden contact. I glared down beside me and saw Nina glancing at up me. She opened and closed her mouth, before pulling me into a small corridor and gestured for me to sit.

"Sit," she hissed at me. I reluctantly sat, raising an eyebrow at her. She paced in front of the window where the sky was a steel grey, the drab hospital gardens spread out below it.

"What?"

"Look... There's something I didn't tell you about the... the accident." At this I straightened up.

"What?" Judging by Nina's wince, I knew how cold I must have sounded and looked in that moment. I drew back, but kept my eyes locked onto hers, my lips pressing into a thin line. She's hurting too, Aiden. It's not just you who cares for April.

"Well... As you know, it was a fox that had come into the road and I had to swerve to avoid crashing into it. But... Something happened before that."

"Get to the point Nina."

"April – she... she would have wanted me to tell you and not leave it like this, but... She told me she loved you." I sat back in my seat at her words. April loved me?

I drew my thoughts together again, keeping my voice level. "When did she tell you this?"

"Just before the crash." Her voice was pinched. I frowned and glanced downwards, only now noticing her arm.

"You're bandages came off?"

She glanced down at her arm distractedly and nodded before staring at me. "Yeah. Doctors said it was safe to take them off now." Her tone changed. "I'm sorry I told you, it wasn't any of my business, but I thought the time was right to tell you."

I leaned forward in my seat, my hands intertwining so I could rest my chin on them. "You're right, it wasn't any of your business to tell me. And why the hell are you making it sound like April's going to die before she has the chance to tell me?" My voice whipped the air like poison and I saw Nina visibly flinch. I realized why she'd pulled me into the corridor alone – she didn't want Diego sugar-coating my words or protecting her – I noticed people were now wary of what they said around me now – it was only Emma who told me things straight now.

She looked down at her feet and said nothing. I sighed and stood up just as she backed up against the window. I bit my lip and racked my brain for things to say – April would have hit me by now if she had seen how I was acting. She wouldn't want me to be a douche, right? Would she?

"Okay, look I'm sorry. That was wrong of me to say. T-thank you for telling me, Nina."

A small, hesitant smile appeared on her face. "And – well, I wanted to apologize. If it wasn't for me swerving that stupid car, we would have never crashed and April woul-" Her voice was bordering on hysteria and I shook my head, not wanting to deal with any tears right now.

"It's not your fault Nina. It's no-one's fault." I was being genuine about that. It wasn't her fault - and I wasn't going to let her believe that, no matter how angry I was initially. "And I'm... I'm glad you're okay."

She stared at me uncertainly for a few moments, as though afraid I would suddenly say psych but I said nothing and instead, shoved my hands into my pockets and rocked back and forth on my heels, watching the sky bleed into pink. I love April too. But who could I say that to?

I waited outside for Nina to finish her talk with Aiden. My breathing hitched in my throat as I remember what April had looked like in that hospital room.

She was like a broken doll lying there – weak and vulnerable, with her halo of hair spreading across the cotton pillow. A wave of guilt washed over me and I hung my head low in shame. April and Nina had both been trying to reach out to me and what did I do? I shunned them and lied and told them I hated them. And for what? Because Noah had enmities with Aiden and Diego's pack; I felt so useless and empty without them, but I didn't want to upset Noah, not when I'd just found him. I was wrong. So wrong.

I loved Noah, despite his insecurities and demons. I wouldn't leave him for the world. He'd persuaded me to come and see April – he felt bad himself, although I wasn't quite sure why. He had a heart of gold; I just wish other people saw that and not that crazed, guilt-ridden boy they saw the night of the accident.

The double doors swung open and Nina emerged. Aiden exited after her, looking completely and utterly tired.

His usually messy hair was actually messy and stuck up in all directions and was growing long now. His eyes were a mix of black and grey and surrounded by bags. Stubble grew across his face and his clothes were creased. He looked far too thin.

He nodded once at me before walking away, presumably back to April. I recoiled back in shock; I'd expected Aiden to have ignored me or let loose some snarky comment or another. But he didn't – he didn't even sneer in my direction.

"You know, Aiden's guarded April like a wolf at her bedside for the past 2 months now. I wonder how he does it, everyday. He's exhausted." Nina said quietly, her eyes travelling over to Aiden who had just disappeared through the double doors.

"I know," I breathed back. "But you do what you have to for the ones you love." I paused. "I can't help but feel that this is my fault. April tried so hard with me Nina, and what did I do –"

She cut me off. "Don't speak like that Kay. April stuck by your side all that time, don't lose your faith in her. She'll get through this, she's a fighter."

"2 months. 2 goddamn months." I muttered under my breath. Nina murmured words of agreement and we fell into that comfortable silence I had missed for so long.

"Do you think we should talk to Diego about Aiden?"

"I already have. Diego said he'll knock the words: eat, sleep, repeat, into his head, but I don't know when he's going to do it. Aid's always here. But I don't blame him – I can't imagine what Diego would be like if I was in April's position." She whispered, her head dropping into her hands.

I gave her a side hug and leaned my head against her shoulder, feeling the familiar warmth I felt being with my friends. Except April's not here. "She'll wake up." I announced confidently. I had to believe – it was all we had left.

My mind drifted back to Noah and my heart sunk slightly in my chest. He'd been avoiding me and I wasn't quite sure why. "Coffee?"

Nina's eyes brightened and she nodded, glancing towards the cafeteria. "Hospital coffee sucks."

"Ah, but it's all we have." Our inadequate attempts at lightening the mood were failing. April usually did that but we nodded our heads anyway and started off towards the cafeteria, our steps falling into line.

"So, have you met Olivia?" Nina started awkwardly, looking towards me and then back at her scuffed shoes.

"Olivia? Ap's sister? Well I've seen her and said hello, but I've not really spoken to her. Melissa and Robert are nice though."

"Yeah, they're great. We'll go and sit with April after for longer; we may as well give her family some time with her first." We fell into a silence after that. Winter had quickly lapsed into early spring and the welcome shoots of plants were beginning to sprout in the world outside, the familiar ceruleans and cerise's of flowers coming to life. The beginning of life again – April has to wake up now. I felt guilt even going to school now – it felt like April had to walk the corridors with us and shout at us for spitting in teachers coffees and not doing our homework. She liked school more than us and instead she was lying in a hospital bed, I thought bitterly to myself, screwing up my forehead at the unfairness of it all.

"Do you know about the injuries?"

I stared at her before clearing my throat and looking downwards shaking my head in shame. This is the first time I've come to visit April in the whole 2 months. I barely know anything.