Helena squinted at the tea in her hands. “And you promise this isn’t blood?”

Olivia rolled her eyes. “We have human guests all the time, Helena. And besides, just giving you our blood would breach our contract with the blood bank.”

That, Helena had to admit, made sense. Besides, the blood appeared to be a limited resource, dropped off weekly. It was like all those rumours about sickos drugging Halloween candy: why waste perfectly good drugs?

She looked around. The whole place felt like a movie set: she and Olivia sat on a vintage velvet loveseat, under a dazzling chandelier. Everything creaked, like the house was constantly settling.

That was a sentiment Helena found herself relating to: constantly settling.

Vampires and fairies are real. I settled that. Then mothman. Or, uh, moth people. Now werewolves. Also, the vampires have been living here in a big house we should’ve been suspicious of but never blinked twice at.

It didn’t surprise her too much. After all, she’d been a spiritual person most of her life. Of course there was magic, and of course it’d been right under her nose. She just hadn’t expected it to be so… urban fantasy in flavour.

Helena took a sip of her drink. Sure enough, it was tea. Good tea, actually, the kind that coated her tongue with a sweet, gentle warmth.

“You probably want an explanation,” Olivia said.

Helena just about choked on her tea. She put it back on the coffee table, a postmodern glass thing that looked needlessly expensive. “I mean, yeah, an explanation would be really cool. Is this where you live?”

Olivia sighed, taking a swig of some dark, silver flask she’d snatched from the kitchen. Helena had no doubt about its contents. “I was taken in soon after I came to Walder. Turns out they’d been waiting for a new vampire, one that knew enough about human life today to be a… you know all that stuff about assimilation Rachel said that day in the bunker?”

That feels like ancient history, Helena thought bleakly, but she nodded. “All of you guys have, like, factions. And you each want a human representative to… what, make world domination easier?”

Olivia chuckled. “It’s not domination, per se. But think of us as… the empathetic aspect. We were all human until super recently, so we know what is and isn’t okay.” She groaned, her fingernails tapping on her flask. “You would not believe how many times I’ve had to remind them murder is frowned upon.”

“Sounds like you’re in great company,” Helena muttered. For the millionth time, she had to ask herself: what choices had she made in life that led her here? To a vampire house? Drinking what she’d had to be assured was tea?

“They’re not that bad,” Olivia said, and she wore a strange, far-off smile. It was the sincerest Helena had ever seen her. “There’re two other fledglings. Apparently, they were on all but house arrest until recently."

“That’s a thing that can happen?”

“Yeah. I had to explain smartphones to them.” She reached into her pocket, and her smile fell. “Ah, shit. I think I dropped my phone at the party.”

Helena reached for her own. “We can track it with mine.”

A thundering of footsteps overhead stopped her in her tracks. Olivia perked up beside her, eyes wide.

“You said you live here with two other fledgling vampires, right?” Helena asked.

Olivia gave the tiniest nod. “And a vamp duchess. And a vamp heiress.” All at once, she sprang to her feet. "It won’t be Rosalyn, because she’s looking at Cami and Cassidy. It can’t be Angelus, because he’s on perimeter. And if it’s Daisy, give her your phone.”

“Why?”

“So she can play games on your phone.”

And for some reason, that was what did it. Helena burst out laughing. It was more hysteria than humour, but who really could tell the difference at this point?

“Hey, is she supposed to be wheezing like that?” inquired a voice from above.

Helena risked a glance up. A woman stood at the top of the stairwell, her legs dangling over the railing. She poked her head between the bars, a curious and rather catlike gesture.

“Oh, just Kara,” Olivia murmured, sighing in relief.

Kara scoffed. “Just Kara? Oh, fuck off.” With startling ease, she slid between the railing bars, landing soundlessly on the floor before them. “Do you know what you’ve done?”

“I never know what I’m doing.”

“You just spilled some beans!” Kara exclaimed, throwing her hands up. “Someone picked up your phone when I went to call you. That’s a someone we might have to murder, unless you plan on making up some kind of part-time job at the mall or whatever. Murder or mall, Livvy.”

Olivia rolled her eyes. “Okay, so you tried calling me? Like it’s still the 90s? That’s your fault.”

Helena watched the two go at it. Despite all the jabs and finger-pointing, she got the distinct sense she was safe. It was like an argument between her younger cousins.

In fact, she’d almost forgotten she was more than a spectator until Kara gestured her way and said, “Please at least tell me this is your human.”

And that was intimidating. The woman was almost as tall as Helena was, which was saying something. Muscular, too, under the band tee and old jeans. Her hair was cut down to a shaggy bob, and bounced as she cocked her head to the side.

“She seems kinda spooked,” Kara went on, her golden eyes gleaming. “Almost like she isn’t supposed to be here.”

“I-I’m supposed to be here,” Helena blurted out. “I’m with Freakspotters. I’m here because Olivia said you could help our friends.”

“Riiiiight.” Kara laughed. “The fairy and the werewolf-to-be. Yeah, Rosalyn’s stabilizing them, and Angelus will help out once he's off perimeter. Gruesome shit, but they’ll live.”

“Perimeter?” Helena echoed.

Olivia groaned. “Kids on Halloween try the dumbest shit with this place.”

And Helena could kind of understand why. Creepy mansion on the edge of town? Prime pranking material. “Right. Okay.” So when the vampire on perimeter got back from being a vampire on perimeter, he’d help Cami and Cassidy. And everyone would be okay. “How are you guys not freaking out right now?” Her voice shook as she asked it.

“I mean, they’re getting patched up.” Olivia looked to Kara for assurance. “Right? And everything will be fine once they’re patched up.”

But how could anything be fine? Someone had gotten mauled nearly to death. Sure, bones healed and skin scabbed over, but what about the memories? Helena already knew she wouldn’t be sleeping tonight, and she’d only seen it. To be attacked by a monster straight out of a horror movie, it was--

“Dammit,” she mumbled, the tears welling up. “I’m sorry. This is stupid.”

The vampires exchanged a nervous look. Olivia crept a hand over Helena’s shoulder.

“There, there,” she managed, a nervous smile on her face.

Kara rolled her eyes. “Geez, Livvy. Have you never comforted a pretty woman before?”

“You think I’m pretty?” Helena squeaked. “Or are you just saying that for some kind of evil vampire reason?”

Olivia groaned, her facade dropping like an ill-fitted mask. “Why are you like this? You’re the reason I’m homophobic.”

“But you’re also gay,” Kara pointed out.

“And homophobic.”

Before Kara could whip out a retort, a new woman entered the room. She was tall and dark-skinned, with navy blue locks kept back in a long braid. She wore thick, black gloves that were covered in what Helena could only assume was blood. Some of the stuff, a dark crimson, had gotten onto her glasses.

“We have a problem,” she said. “Angelus should be able to treat the werewolf victim, but… there’s something wrong with the fey girl.”

Helena’s heart dropped into her gut. “Cami?”

The woman blinked, noticing her for the first time. “Olivia, is this your human?”

“This is a friend,” Olivia replied, her head bowed. She studied the ground, her hands wringing together. “Her name is Helena. She’s from Freakspotters.”

“Ah, so she’s the human.”

“I think the werewolf was supposed to bite me,” Helena blurted out. “I mean, she was about to, but then Cassidy came in and she got attacked instead.”

“So now there’re two The Humans,” Kara added. “I don’t know anything about the other, though. Or this Cassidy girl, for that matter. We might’ve rolled snake eyes here.”

The woman nodded, her lips a solemn line. “So I feared. Cassidy wasn’t even part of the original group, so we have a lot of cleaning up to do.”

Olivia had said something about being the empathetic aspect, hadn’t she? Now it made sense.

They’re talking about us like we’re stains, or potholes, or some other inconvenience to be dealt with.

And that was when it hit her.

“You guys aren’t gonna kill me, are you?” Helena asked.

The front doors flew open. In walked Jane, the other The Human. Rachel tailed her, spinning about as she walked to take in the sights.

“Talk about vintage!” she cooed.

They were followed by Trintio, and a man Helena hadn’t seen before who sped off into another room before anyone could say anything. Trintio, meanwhile, sprawled out on the loveseat beside her and Olivia.

“So, what’d I miss?” he asked, grinning.

“We’re mulling over which human to kill,” the woman deadpanned.

Trintio perked up, his wry look cracking into something a bit more… antsy. “Who’s to say we have to kill any? Rosalyn, we decided we wouldn’t do that anymore.”

“You’re not part of this we, Trintio. I’m shocked you’re still here, after what you pulled last time.” If looks could kill, Rosalyn would’ve turned him into a pile of ashes.

“Wait, this is Trintio?” Kara exclaimed. “Oh man, Angelus never shuts up about you.”

Jane raised a sheepish hand. “We’re just here to meet up with our friends. Where’s Cami?”

“Right. Camilla Wilde.” Rosalyn pinched the bridge of her nose, sighing. “Trintio? Go see to your peoples’ latest spawn, while I sort out this human debacle.” Her gaze snapped to Olivia. “Escort him.”

Trintio stood, offering Rosalyn a bow before he strode off. Olivia stood, offering Helena the quickest flash of a smile and thumbs-up. The universal sign for it’s gonna be alright.

Helena watched them go, partially to avoid looking at the vampires.

“We’re not a debacle,” Jane said, with absolutely none of the bravado to support it. “We’re people, just like you.”

“Who die much quicker,” Rosalyn replied, still scowling. Her hands tugged at her skirt, a long, flowing thing. “Listen, I’m feeling generous, so I’m going to let you plead your case. If both of you have good reasons to be spared, we can try to work something out. If one of you doesn't, it’s nothing personal.”

Helena and Jane exchanged a look. Jane’s lip trembled, but the rest of her face held strong and stony.

“And this isn’t a competition?” Jane asked.

“I’m not one to compare,” Rosalyn assured them. “Just plead your case. You first, new girl. What’s your name?”

Jane perked up, standing stick-straight. “Um, I’m Jane Cardinal. And you shouldn’t kill me because, uh, m-my mom is the mayor. First Indigenous woman to hold an elected position in Walder. Pretty big deal, so if anything happened to me, that’d also be… a big deal.”

Rosalyn nodded. “Alright, that makes sense.” She turned to Helena. “And you?”

How did my life get to this point? Helena thought. Trying to prove my life has worth to a vampire lady so she doesn’t kill me.

And did her life have worth? Like, tangible worth beyond what everyone already had? What would happen if she didn’t leave this place alive?

“Well,” Helena began, swallowing her panic, “I-I live in an all-trans shared housing situation. If I disappeared, r-rent would go up for everyone else, and it could put them in danger, and, uh--”

“You aren’t doing the beg for your life game again, are you?” asked a new voice, high and lilting.

Helena looked past Rosalyn, to where a door had flown open. A girl stood at the entrance, no older than twelve. A girl, but decidedly not a human: she was completely hairless, with pointed ears, a mouth full of fangs, and deep, dark eyes with white catlike slits.

Rosalyn whirled around, glaring down at the girl. “Daisy, aren’t you supposed to be doing your homework?”

Helena choked back another laughing fit. This day was going to break her.

Daisy looked at her, beaming. “Hey! Y’know, Rosie’s all hiss and no bite. She just likes watching people squirm because she barely leaves the house.”

“Is that true?” Jane asked.

"Yep, she's allergic to sunlight."

“I prefer to call this a test of character,” Rosalyn muttered. She turned back to Jane and Helena, spreading her arms in welcome. “This is Thorne Manor. I’m, obviously, Rosalyn Thorne. I’ve been here for sixty-five years, and this isn’t our first attempt at assimilating humanity.” She sighed. “Hopefully, it’s the last.”

“And I’m her boss,” Daisy added merrily. “At least, I will be once I'm older.”

Rachel lit up. “Oh shit, you actually look like a vampire! Does that mean we can all take off our human disguises?”

“Human disguises?” Helena echoed.

“I’m a mothgirl,” she reminded her. “I don’t always look like this.”

She stretched her arms out, and two dark wings sprouted out of her back. Two long, slender antennae bloomed from her skull. Her eyes gained an unearthly glow.

“Ta-daaaaaah,” she drawled, waving long, clawed hands about.

“Have you always been able to do that?” Helena murmured.

“I mean, yeah. Most of us have freakier forms. You should ask Olivia to go full vampire sometime. She’ll get big ol’ cat eyes, pointy ears, so many teeth, claws bigger than mine, maybe a forked tongue, uh...”

Helena listened to her ramble on. Tried to conceive her classmate transformed.

“Cool," she said.

Rosalyn groaned. “I’m making more tea.”