《Harmless Sweetie (Rewritten)》Chapter 12:Total Loss of Hope

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"We're home!" A young voice chirped. Wondering where the sound came from, I sat up and peeked at the door to see a young boy, probably nine years old, and a plain-looking woman that wore a simple brown sundress.

'Ooh, he has a family. That's a bit surprising, he definitely feels more like a bachelor-type than a married one. I wish he would have mentioned something about a family sooner, this complicates plans if there are two people keeping watch on me at all times.' I let out a heavy mental sigh. It's not like I'm afraid of showing my housework skills, but if I suddenly make a plush toy come to life then I'll definitely look like some sort of genius when it's really just an effect of my unique skill.

'In all the stories I've read, geniuses always get stuck in an academy arc. I have to avoid that at all costs. I don't want to do all-nighters again for research papers.' My main goal right now was also nothing related to school or academies, so it would just be a huge roadblock for me. Maybe in the future, when I'm older and wiser, then I'll desire to go to an educational institution. But as of right now I just wanted to go back to my home continent and try to find my family.

"Gian, why is there a child here?" Asked the woman, for a moment she sweetly smiled at me as she came into the house. But, that changed when she blinked and her eyes felt like they pierced through my soul. I felt her gaze scan through my entire being, as if she was looking directly at my soul. Her eyes showed uncertainty, and a hint of deadly aggression as her eyes scanned my entire being. "Gian, take Light with you." She yelled out through the house, not taking her eyes off me.

"Hi…" I managed to croak out in a very small voice, I had no idea why exactly the woman looked at me with such scary eyes. So I thought that speaking would maybe diffuse the situation.

"Don't you dare speak another word, monster!" Three flaming arrows materialised around my neck, I could feel their heat slowly roasting my skin. I couldn't move and try to shake them off as they were near enough that a single movement could get me stabbed. "Why the hell do you have Shul'ka's mark?" The woman urged me to answer by slightly burning the nape of my neck, her eyes were furious, and full of motherly protection as she held the boy, whose name was apparently Light (A very lame and boring name) close.

"I don't know. Please let me go. If you don't want me around I'll just go." I offered, I managed to sound calm even when my heart felt as if it was going to explode. I guess my experience with dealing with muggers from my past life can come into handy here.

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But joking aside, it really hurt. I didn't like this, and I can feel the flames getting hotter by the second. Tears were forming in my ducts, and I think she noticed as a terribly confused and mildly concerned expression showed for a split second before returning into a cautious and dangerous one.

I could feel sweat forming on my forehead, and tears in my eyes were threatening to fall. The pain and heat was too much, but I couldn't move at all from my pose, or else I risked dying via stabbing. I couldn't help but let out small sobs and hics.

"Lisa-? What are you doing to Clailip!?" Gian briskly walked to his wife and gave her an angry look. "Dispel those arrows now!" He ordered.

"You don't get to order me around, Gian! That kid's got the mark of The Glutton! Why in the hell is he in our home?!" Lisa's tone was drenched in anger and confusion.

"He's a refugee! Spared by The Glutton for an unknown reason! We found him by the entrance speaking Eastern. □□□□□□□□□!" Gian broke into what sounded like Western Speak in the latter half of his argument. "Don't worry, I've already tested him earlier. He isn't one of Shul'ka's children."

"...Oh." She dispelled the fire arrows, I didn't have any time to see what kind of expression she made as I couldn't help but break out into a full-on cry as I held my neck. Tears streamed down my face as I tried to soothe my burnt neck with what little ice mana in the vicinity I could command. I didn't have any mana in me, so I couldn't use an ice-spell, so I had to make do with this.

The pain was absolutely unbearable, it felt as if some of my skin had peeled off, and I could feel the nape of my neck screaming at me to put something, anything, cold on it. My small hics from earlier turned to ugly gasps for air as I wailed my heart out. I felt a big, but gentle hand swat away the ones that I had rubbing my burnt skin.

I felt mana course through my neck, the pain slowly faded into nothing more than a horrible afterfeel. My wails turned into soft sobs, then into nothing more than sniffles. I felt the skin around my neck, surprisingly it was as smooth as from before the burning. I don't think there were any scars at all.

I opened up my teary eyes to see a worried Gian casting healing magic on my neck. He looked very focused. I looked around and saw Lisa with a remorseful, yet still very distrusting look, she didn't seem to trust whatever Gian had said.

"We still can't keep him around, you know that. We can't risk getting Light in danger. That kid's already as good as dead if he's been marked by Shul'ka." Lisa spoke up as he watched Gian heal me. "He also has a memetic-type skill, I can feel it breaking through my resistances. I know you have a soft heart, but I also know you're not stupid enough to keep that kid around. After healing him I'll snap you out. I told you, you should have trained your mental resistance."

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"We can't just leave him out to die, Lisa. Look at him! He's such a harmless little lad. He wouldn't be able to do anything against that monster, I'm going to t-"

"No. We can't help him. You're going to put Light in harm's way, any other refugee, just not him."

"His parents have already…you know. Can you really leave someone like him out to die? To be eaten and made part of the Abyss' army of monsters?"

"Yes. We are not responsible for him."

On one hand, I feel relieved that apparently not everyone is going to act all weird around me. But on the other hand, I now feel a bit scared. Was Shul'ka going to hunt for me soon?

"Am I going to be eaten by Shul'ka?" My voice trembled as the words left my mouth, I wanted to throw up from the fear induced by the imaginary scenario of being torn apart alive by that pillar of wriggling limbs.

Although, a small part of me scarily wanted that to happen. For me to be torn apart by the monster, for me to bathe in my own blood as I sacrifice it for the Abyss. And to be reborn in the waters of the Abyss' womb—.

'Snap out of it! What the actual fuck are you going on about!' I screamed at myself, and the disturbing thoughts that invaded my mind.

"Maybe. Most people that have the mark that are not from the abyss are eaten by The Glutton days after they receive it." Lisa's answer made me go pale, I could feel my heart going ballistic as I tried to think of anything that could even try to stop such a monster. I saw Shul'ka, and felt its presence. It was the most terrified that I've ever been in my two lifetimes. Though, oddly, something in me wanted to be one with the fear that Shul'ka struck in me, to harness it, to make it mine and a part of me.

"Lisa! Stop scaring him. You'll be fine, Clailip. Don't listen to Lisa, most people marked by it that were eaten were horrible criminals. Shul'ka is allergic to innocent people it seems." Gian tried to comfort me, but I just felt even more hopeless. I had a feeling that he was lying, Shul'ka was a monster through and through. What kind of monster would pick and choose their victim? Wouldn't they just go on an indiscriminate rampage?

"Gian, that's just hearsay It hasn't been proven yet, it's better to let the child know than let it hope for a tomorrow that may never come." Lisa's voice sounded as if it was pained, "Shit, his skill is getting to me. He has to go now, Gian! If you don't make him go out now, I'll drag him out myself. I can't risk my baby's life for a stranger."

Well, I guess it doesn't matter even if I was in their presence anyway. It's best to just leave people alone. I'll just wander the city and wait for the day Shul'ka comes up from another hole beneath me.

And that would be my end.

Somehow, it all just feels so bitter. I've finally got my childhood wish of getting proper parents, and having a nice childhood. Then it was all just torn away from me in a single night.

'So, this is despair.'

I had no more hope for tomorrow. The lady, Lisa, was right. At least with what little time I have left before it devours me, I can make peace with myself. I've never been afraid of death anyway.

But this all just is so bitter. This feeling of hopelessness, this despair filling me up with empty nothingness. The numbing fear of, not death, but that monster. It all just combined and overwhelmed my kid mind.

Shul'ka was a monster… actually… it was more than a monster, there's no way humans would be able to kill it off.

So I did the responsible thing and got up with no word, and walked towards the house's door. Gian tried to stop me, but Lisa told him off. The moment I stepped out, the door was slammed closed and the clicking of locks could be heard, before arguing erupted. I made my way through the dark streets of the city, not minding anything around me, shakily walking, somewhere, anywhere. I didn’t want to get Horsey and the soldiers killed, so I’ll just find an alley to be eaten in.

[NOTICE! Dangerously low mood levels detected, Harmless Sweetie has activated.]

It's no use. No matter what kind of skills activate, I'll still die by the hands of that monster.

[NOTICE! Dangerously low mood levels detected, Harmless Sweetie has activated.]

I'll just end up being feed for a monster.

[NOTICE! Dangerously low mood levels detected, Harmless Sweetie has activated.]

This hopelessness… how familiar.

[NOTICE! Harmless Sweetie cannot regulate Clailip Diancia’s mood with its current level. Halting its activation to conserve energy.]

“Mama…Papa…”

[NOTICE! The Blessing of Shul’ka, The Fragment of Fear, has been activated. Reason for activation: Extremely low mood levels, total loss of hope, inability to fight.]

"Oh... it's coming..." I inwardly laughed at myself, to think that I even had a day to steel my mind for the inevitable. The laughs turned to sniffles, and the sniffles turned into sobs, then into wails.

So unfair. This is so unfair.

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