Look at this sketchy guy, I thought to myself as I indifferently watched a tall fair skinned man with nothing particularly suspicious about him besides his all black clothing that looked like he just bought, the strong resolve in his eyes and, I don’t know- my intuition told me he wanted to rob me. Okay I guess there was quite a bit suspicious about him, but regardless of whether or not he was about to rob me I still just had to ask,

“Welcome to Ronalds, can I take your order?”(Joseph Ashton AKA me) The restaurant was fairly crowded, and the guy had patiently waited his turn in line while I took the orders of customers ahead of him. I was the only one manning the front desk, while my co-workers Anna and Rachel were slaving away in the kitchen. Though there were an odd number of people in the fast food restaurant, it was actually 2am. It seemed to happen occasionally where people start coming in one by one at a steady rate like it was all planned. Most likely they were watching some late night TV and got baited by an ad or something. I was bored out of my mind working the night shift, and when these owls suddenly flock in we obviously get overwhelmed with so few of us in the store until they fuck off. Just when I was reflecting on these annoying bastards, my intuition seemed to be correct as the guy pulled out a small snub nose revolver and pointed it in my direction.

“Give me all the money in the registers.”(Sketchy guy trying to sound professional) The sketchy dude said in a low voice. Maybe he wasn’t expecting there to be so many people in here, but he just decided to say fuck it and go for it? I showed no real reaction to the gun, which surprised him and myself as well. I’d never been in a life and death scenario before, so it wasn’t like I was used to it. But for some reason I couldn’t muster any shits to give to this guy’s little gun at that moment. Shit I need to say something cool, I feel like a badass, and probably look like one too! I quickly wracked my brains and calmly said an awkward silence,

“And would you like to make that a meal today, sir?”(Joseph) Not as cool as I thought, but the delivery of the line went super well! By this point the other customers had noticed the guy pointing a gun at me, and a few started screaming while one insanely hot woman had enough sense to start calling the cops. Why the fuck is this guy robbing a fucking Ronalds anyway? Maybe sensing my thoughts, the face of the man in front of me contorted in anger, and the resolve in his eyes seemed to grow stronger.

“YOU THINK IM FUCKING AROUND?!”(Loud annoying and sketchy guy) He might as well have roared the words out they were so damn loud. Not what I was expecting after that quiet introduction, I thought for sure he was a soft spoken pus- My mental insult was rudely interrupted as he squeezed the trigger on the revolver, opening a hole in my shoulder and promptly splattering my blood and a bit of gore all over miscellaneous drink making machines, and some stale pocket pies. Huh? That didn’t hurt nearly as much as I thought getting shot would- no, it’s definitely not normal- people usually cry out in agony when they get shot right? And yet I didn’t feel a much more than a tingling sensation, and some regret for the delicious pies I had planned on eating once these customers finally fucked off. I tossed the pies a glance, No way am I eating those now. Of the two pies, the one closest to me was drenched in blood on its similarly drenched in blood shelf, and the other was no worse for wear- it even had a chunk of my shoulder resting beside it.

My apple pie mourning session had only taken a single moment, and at that same moment all hell broke loose around us. Anna and Rachel finally noticed what was going on at the front as they had managed to ignore the screams with the music blasting through their ear-buds but obviously couldn’t shrug off the sound of the .38 revolver round’s obnoxiously loud entrance into my shoulder. I felt a pinprick like I had just gotten a needle that I wasn’t expecting- it was over with quickly. My two female co-workers promptly turned their fairly attractive asses around and ran for the employee entrance, screaming. Also screaming even louder than before were the customers in the restaurant, who also started running for their lives. All except for one- the bombshell from before who had been on the phone with the police was looking at me curiously. I would look at the guy who took that shot to the shoulder like a champ with no more reaction than a blink like too. The man was staring at me incredulously as a few seconds had passed since he shot me, and something had changed in his eyes. His resolve was replaced with a deep regret, and I stared back at him with the same look of incredulousness for a completely different reason. What a pussy. Was my first reason, but on top of that, when the hell did I get so good at reading people’s expressions?! This guy is like an open book and he’s certainly not like a childhood fucking friend I’ve spent thousands of hours with.

Clearly the reality of the situation hadn’t really set in for me yet, but my shits to give bucket was nonetheless still empty, and so I didn’t know what to tell the guy. At that moment the tingling in my shoulder was replaced by a comforting warmth, and I felt like I was the king of the motherfucking world. My body felt great, my eyes felt sharper, and my surroundings were revealed to me in a new vivid detail, even shit I couldn’t possibly ‘see’. Rather, I could ‘sense’ it all, most customers running to the parking lot to get in their cars while others just ran down the empty streets. Rachel and Anna were huddled near the giant waste bin and were talking into a phone, nice of them to call the police for me I thought. I could feel the darkness of the night and dim luminosity of the moon far above the artificial lights, which were drenching nearly every inch of asphalt around the building with their pale glows. My thought processes had seemingly become much more efficient since the first moment I laid eyes on that sketchy guy, because I could tell it had still only been at most 5 seconds since I had been shot. I could also tell for some reason that my shoulder was no longer injured, like it had never happened. I forced myself to stop probing my surroundings in the huge 1km radius, mostly because there was nothing interesting besides a few cars on the nearby interstate. But mostly because of the look on the guys face had gone from incredulity to amazement and shock, and I was loving every millisecond of it. I need a cool follow up!!

“While I know not a lot of people say yes to that question I still have to ask, ya know? Aside from that, would you like to add pies to your order? Its 2 for 2 dollars but I’m sure you could get some kind of discount.”(Joseph) YES!! Got em, I think? Shit I don’t know. My fears of looking uncool were quickly dispersed as the amazement on the guys face was quickly turned into fear, and as he started firing more rounds into my chest he started stammering

“M-M-Monster!”(Sketchy guy) His shriek was barely audible over the numerous reports of his revolver, but my hearing was as badass as all my other new senses and I could easily make it out within the commotion.

“Agh!! Fuck off with that already!”(Joseph) I couldn’t stop the words coming out of my mouth as the shots to the heart, lungs, rib-cage and other vital organs hurt a bit more than the initial one to my shoulder. Though still not as bad as being shot is supposed to feel like I’m pretty sure. Indeed it hurt a bit more, something akin to being stabbed by a toothpick, but I was a shut-in and not to mention a fairly large pussy before all this late night nonsense. On the outside I probably seemed indifferent to most things, but it was because of all the manga and light novels I was in the process of reading that wouldn’t get off my mind. As my rapid fire thoughts were going unnoticed, the bastard finally ran out ammo. A total of 4 rounds had penetrated all across my torso, one near my heart through my tag which had previously announced my favorite beverage but was now illegible. As for the others, two to the right side of my body near my lung and one where I assumed my liver to be. His spread was pretty bad, but to his credit he had shot them all pretty quickly. Why the fuck didn’t he shoot me in the head? Unbeknownst to me at the time, the guy had never shot a gun before in his life, and he was on a ‘morally justifiable’ mission to get money for his daughter and blah-blah-blah that I didn’t give a shit about but found out later regardless. The woman who had watched the whole exchange with a mixture of fear and curiosity, with her curiosity somehow managing to keep her from running, finally spoke up.

“The police are on their way, so unless you have some more effective bullets I’d suggest getting out of here”(Odd woman helping the burglar for some reason) While she talked a familiar warmth enveloped the shot up parts of my body and in no time at all my wounds once again faded.

That doesn’t mean that my surroundings were spared though, holy hell! It looks like a war zone behind this counter! Indeed, every shot had sprayed a large number of chunks and blood had sprayed out of him like a hose, covering the walls and equipment behind me in a thick coat of my life force. He failed to notice the state of his clothes though, as his wounds were all bleeding profusely before they closed up. From below his neck that only had spatters, his clothes were dyed a dark red.

The chunks of my various organs were also on display on some of the metallic shelves, which I couldn’t help but chuckle at while only feeling a little bit disturbed. And it’s convenient I don’t have to turn around to ‘see’ the shit behind me now! The woman probably thought I was laughing at her statement, and the guy with all black clothes covered in my blood swiftly followed her advice and bolted for the exit. I could hear a cacophony of various sirens for a while now, but they were getting annoyingly loud and weren’t even within a kilometer of the building yet. Rachel and Anna were hugging each other in fear in the enclosed area with the dumpster, I listened in to their conversation inadvertently.

“Do you think Joe is alright? He fired like a warning shot or something didn’t he? Why-“ (Anna)

“Shh! He’s probably dead, you heard all those shots right? If YOU don’t want to be next then shut the fuck up and let’s wait quietly until the police get here and arrest this crazy asshole.” (Rachel) Her words instantly confirmed Anna’s fear in her heart, and she couldn’t help but start crying softly, muffling her sobs with her hand. She had liked Joe, though she had never told him. Despite the fact he stole lewd glances at all the attractive female employees and never talked much. She felt a strange attraction to him, and she could tell he wasn’t a bad person.

Once the man had fled the building, the woman spoke up again.

“What are you?”(Too curious for her own good woman) I contemplated my answer. She’s right, what the fuck am I? If not for the holes in my clothes and blood all over me and my immediate surroundings, you’d never guess I’d just taken five .38 rounds to the chest. I found the perfect answer.

“A Ronalds’ employee, I guess? My name’s Joe” (Joe on a cheese streak) I pointed to the mangled name tag that had managed to stay attached. He could tell she was dissatisfied with the answer, but what was she expecting? I’m a vampire, or some bullshit?

“My name is Elise, I take it you eat bullets for breakfast or something?” (Curious chick AKA Elise) At this point the sirens were making it hard not to want to rip off my ears, but I was slowly figuring out how to toon them out. Adjustable super-hearing check.

“Nope~, to be honest, I have no clue what the fuck just happened. Hahaha~”(Joe) I finally decided to stop acting like the terminator in a Ronalds’ suit and state my opinion, which seemed to relieve most of the fear that was still lingering in her eyes. It was quickly replaced by something he recognized as lust, or something? I finally took the time to check her out. She was a 5”9’ platinum blonde with a double D chest, mostly flawless skin (My eyes were too good for my own good), bright red lips, smoky eyes and all around insanely attractive! How the hell did I not notice how fine this woman was?! Or maybe it wasn’t that I hadn’t noticed but I was rather preoccupied with pies and-

“We should go tell my co-workers that it’s all clear.”(Joe) It was at that point I remembered the whispered conversation of my two cute and terrified minimum wage brethren. He could sense them near the bin and it didn’t take long to walk over with the beautiful blonde in tow, who was checking me out from behind. I know she thinks I can’t notice what she’s doing, but damn! Could she be more obvious?! I trained my body fairly well at home every day, so my firm cheeks probably looked pretty good in the uniform, was my self-conceited conclusion.

In reality, the woman had just gone through a life and death scenario, and the apparent ‘hero’ of the ordeal happened to be in her strike zone. She was actually a 23 year old virgin otaku, who despite going to Ronalds’ occasionally, didn’t go out much. In fact she was a lot like Joseph, in more ways than one.

“Rachel, Anna, that guy is gone, you can come out now”(Joe) He sensed Anna perk up instantly, while Rachel quietly clicked her tongue. Bitch. Anna opened the small entrance to the enclosed waste disposal area and ran over jumping into my arms, while Rachel calmly made her way over. I caught her in my arms as she buried her face in my fairly muscular chest while she sobbed. Naturally I couldn’t help but gently stroke her head and whispering some comforting words. At least I’m trying to be comforting, holy hell! This is my first ‘intimate’ contact with a woman in years! The waste enclosure was entombed by the asphalt prison of parking spaces and surrounded on all four corners by tall lamp posts. Elise looked disappointed, as she thought to herself ‘Damn, he already has a girlfriend’. Reading her thoughts through her face I had the urge to tell her it’s not what it looks like, but that would probably be the wrong thing to say here right?

Finally Anna managed to say, “I’m so glad you’re alright... I never.. Had the courage to say this but, I’ve liked you for a while now, Joe!” Jesus, what a dramatic confession! Made between sobs and right after an armed robbery! Rachel had a look of carefully hidden disdain that wasn’t hard for me to pick up on, and Elise looked relieved. She obviously thinks she won’t lose to this young, decently attractive Ronalds employee. Pretty sure Anna told me she was 18 though right… Putting aside that train of thought for now, she was a couple inches shorter to my 6”2’ buried in my chest still looking up at me, with pale dyed blue hair with subtle blonde highlights that somehow suited her. She had a fairly rounded face with a small nose and otherwise plain features. The light of the lamp posts was reflected by her clear and innocent looking blue eyes, giving her a few more points of attractiveness. Her C cup breasts were pressed up against me, while I had to restrain my hands from exploring her thin waist and tight ass. But… Compared to the lusting beauty behind me I couldn’t help but be left wanting. Rachel was a bitch, so I’m not going to bother describing her. On another note, what the fuck am I supposed to say here?!

Without skipping a beat using my upgraded brain to do all the shit I just did and thought about I instanstly responded, “I’m glad your safe too Anna.” Perfect non-committal answer, maybe it’ll even get me a few points with blondie. Judging by Elise’s expression my hypothesis was correct, as her lusty gaze burned brighter. Rachel didn’t say a thing, and it was at this moment when 3 roaring Crown Vic’s and one of the newer charger police squad cars came and interrupted our parking lot drama, saving my ass. Praise the sun! Anna was obviously not happy with that answer. The perimeter of the lot was lined with lamp posts and with the combined flashing red and blue lights you could barely tell it was 2:04am. It’s only been four fucking minutes! That’s one hell of a response time! If he had ever payed attention to his surroundings he’d know that the police HQ was actually only a short distance up the highway he had been probing earlier.

The squad cars promptly surrounded the 4 of them leaving 10 meters from myself to the nearest car. They all quickly got out, but only 2 of the officers approached them from the same car. One of them was in his late 50’s with a few grey hairs, many more wrinkles on his forehead and a disappointingly shaved face. Old cops definitely need facial hair I reaffirmed myself. The other was a young looking guy in his mid 20’s, likely a noobie or something.

The older one spoke first “We received two calls about an armed robbery,” His gaze only broke from examining me to glance over the other 3 for a moment and then “what happened to you? And where did he go?”(Mustache-less cop) How am I going to explain he shot me a few times and ran off? Oh wait-

“He shot me a few times and ran off.”(Victim) I pointed where he ran, down the street away from the interstate, towards the town. Though it was a few kilometers to the nearest building which was a gas station, the residential area started in force pretty soon after that.

The old guy quickly dispatched the other cars through his radio, and as they tore through the parking lot, sirens blazing once again it was now just us the 6 of us. Though it wouldn’t be just them for long, as I could hear an ambulance coming speeding their way. Though the others definitely can’t hear it yet. How OP am I? I could tell that soon enough my indifferent armor was going to start peeling off, with all this crazy shit going on.

“Were any of you witness to what happened? You don’t seem to be in a lot of pain for a guy that ‘got shot a few times’”(Young cop) Though it wasn’t as if he could completely blow off my claims, because my uniform had caked blood all over it and 5 scattered holes across my chest and corresponding holes on my back.

“I saw it all, it is as he said.” (Curious Elise)

“Do you need medical assistance then?”(Old cop) Shit, do I? It’s not like I can exactly say ‘no’ right? Plus I won’t have to deal with any police crap for a while. The ambulance would be here in less than a minute and everyone could now hear its approach.

“Yeah, I think I do.”(Nonchalant Joe) This sentence caused Elise and Anna to make concerned faces, though the lust in Elise’s hadn’t died down, while Rachel seemingly didn’t give a shit. The ambulance made its timely arrival after a few introductions and a brief recollection of what happened between me and Elise, while Rachel and Anna mentioned the initial shot and their prompt escape. More squad cars had also arrived to keep the curious onlookers from nearby neighbourhoods at bay. Some arrived in their pajamas, probably getting awoken by the gunfire and being unable to resist the urge to see something interesting in their urban lives.

The old cop was a sheriff unoriginally named Bob Fredol, while the younger greenhorn partner as I had accurately guessed, was named Nick Patterson. They were lively individuals, though it may have just been because something exciting had happened for the first time in a long while in this relatively small town.

The paramedics immediately rushed towards me as I obviously looked pretty injured, what with my holey blood suit and all. They were a bit confused after examining my nonexistent wounds once they shoved me into the ambulance, but decided not to take any chances are were going to bring me to the hospital. It was at this moment when the yearning gaze of a certain curious babe reached its breaking point and she couldn’t help but ask,

“Do you want me to ride in the ambulance with you? That must have obviously been very traumatic.” (Elise) Hell yes! However the paramedics looked less willing so I immediately added,

“Yeah it was, I’d gladly accept your offer.”(Sneaky Joe) It’s not like the paramedics would say anything after that, and didn’t even bother asking if she was a relative or anything before she climbed into the back of the medic van after me. I hope she wants to fuck in the hospital or something kinky like that. Of course it had been years since the last time he had sex so he was obviously excited and using massive amounts of willpower he stopped himself from getting an erection. Her seductive posture on the bench next to him, combined with her amazing scent certainly didn’t help. It was something akin to standing in a vast overpowering field of vanilla. However I wasn’t allowed to bask in the field for long, as the paramedic who wasn’t driving asked me to lay on the table in the middle and remove my clothes.

I tried my best to take them off in a cool and smooth manner, but who knows if I succeeded? It’s probably not even necessary at this point, look at the thirst in those eyes! Had the paramedic been a woman or perhaps if he was a bit less dense he would have noticed the obvious sexual tension between his passengers, but (thankfully?) he didn’t. Elise didn’t even seem to be fazed by the blood soaking his chest, and was probably more interested in the muscle that rippled beneath it. Without his clothes on to indicate where the holes had been, there was no obvious indication of where to look either. The baffled paramedic wiped him down as he was lying on the table and was dumbfounded to see that there were no marks anywhere on my body, not even a scar.

I definitely had a few acne scars, not to mention a few actual scars on my shins from a bike accident when I was younger. Thus even he was a bit confused at the lack of skin damage, anywhere on his body. I was naked on the table, much to the excitement of Elise, who could probably barely contain herself judging by her facial expressions. She’s already wet! Indeed, with his new senses he perceived the liquid that was slowly soaking into her panties beneath her skirt. Knowing she was wet for him, he couldn’t maintain his self-control and as his willpower collapsed he immediately got a raging boner. He had by no means been dissatisfied with his dick before, at a proud 7 inches erect. But after that ‘awakening’ of his weird powers it seems his penis grew along with his confidence. Thus the ambulance ride continued: Joe laying naked on the table with a raging 9 bull proudly dominating the space, Elise’s ‘moisture’ levels increasing with flushed cheeks while unabashedly gazing at his proud dong and various parts of his body, and the silent paramedic that was playing on his smart phone. His boner lasted all the way into the ambulance entrance at the hospital, before dying down as they prepared to exit (to Elise’s disappointment). The paramedic gave him a patients plain dot patterned robe before they got out of the van. Why wouldn’t he give this to me right after doing those tests on my heart rate and shit? Questioning the paramedics’ sexuality, he casually stepped out of the van into the swarm of doctors who had been given reports of the gunfire that were ready for potential wounded.

I can’t do it yet, but as soon as I get home I’m testing the limit of my new power! I feel like a fucking huge pig amongst runty guinea pigs! So far he had only tasted his new regen and OP senses, but he honestly felt like he could do just about anything if given some time alone to figure it out.

Elise wasn’t allowed to come into the room while they confirmed his vital organs with various scans, but she waited impatiently in an uncomfortable chair for him anyways. Hell yeah, she’s totally thinking the same thing about a hospital sex scene! He was told he didn’t have any complications they could detect, but he was still going to be kept overnight just in case. After they brought him to his room and left him alone, Elise immediately entered with red cheeks, looking a bit nervous. Is that even allowed? Like, I’m pretty sure it isn’t visiting hours or anything…

She didn’t say anything as she walked over seductively, and it was then that he sincerely wished she was wearing a slutty nurse outfit. Still making her way over, her clothes responded to his will, revealing a skin tight nurse outfit that could barely contain her double D’s. The outfit was a white, one piece dress that went from half way down her breasts to a quarter way down her thighs, revealing her smooth flawless legs. Her old jeans and tank top seemingly vanished and he couldn’t be happier with the upgrade. She also had a cute little nurse hat with a + on it, pretty sure there are no nurses that aren’t porn stars with that kind of hat nowadays though… Who am I to question this blessing?!

She was obviously intensely confused and thrown off for a moment by the sudden change of clothes, but after I sent her a wink she quickly got over it and continued her sexy walk to his bedside, bringing with it her incredible scent. She unhesitatingly crawled on top of him on the cot sized hospital bed. She could obviously see his raging boner which lifted up quite a bit of his robe, and there was only one place this was going so there wasn’t much need for pleasantries.

As soon as she was properly straddling him properly with his cock rubbing against half her stomach, she suddenly leaned down and whispered in his ear “It’s my first time, so be gentle~” After that she pulled back her face a bit and I immediately closed in on her lips. It wasn’t long before we were passionately tongue wrestling, and I used my superior senses to accurately kiss and rub her lower lips with my dick. As I started sliding it up and down across her clit, her face fell into the pillow beside mine, right beside my ear.

“Ah~, unnn~…Ah!~”(Who knows?)

No man could keep his sanity listening to this beauty straddle them while moaning in their ear, but I somehow managed to avoid abruptly thrusting into her. Needless to say, a slutty nurse has no need for panties and the ones she was wearing had simply disappeared. As the dimly glowing moon perfectly illuminated our bed in the otherwise dark room, I slowly began to insert the tip into her smooth and completely hairless vagina. Her incessant moaning was making being gentle incredibly difficult, yet he knew if he didn’t take it slow and steady she wouldn’t enjoy it. With his new powers, he accurately judged the perfect amount of force he should use to break her hymen and plunder the depths of that amazing pussy.

As soon as he was through “EEEee! Ahh~Ahhh~Ah!~” She was obviously in pain and since he didn’t have the time nor patience to wait for her to get over it he used his newfound powers once more to will her to only experience pleasure.

“Kuh! So tight!” His dick was way too big for her tiny and inexperienced hole, and she was literally being ripped apart. Blood was leaking out of her along with two other milky fluids, there’s no way she’s enjoying this! He wasn’t sure if his power had actually worked, but he was starting to get the idea that if he wanted it to happen he could make it so.

However despite his doubts... “I-I’m cumm~ingg~!” That was fast, probably my power’s fault though, and no way in hell were done yet! It had only been the initial thrust but it was enough pain turned into pleasure to immediately incite an orgasm in the young virgin beauty.

She collapsed onto his chest powerlessly, however this also thrusted the rest of whatever would fit of his dick inside her, causing her another wave of incredible pleasure and many micro-orgasms. As she spasmed on top of him she thought to herself ‘I’m pretty sure it’s not supposed to feel like this for the first time!’ Her moment of mental clarity was abruptly swept away as he began thrusting in and out of her, increasing his pace every 5 thrusts for what his mind was telling him was ‘maximum efficiency’. His power allowed him to cum freely, and every time she would orgasm he would as well. The bed was getting quickly soaked while the two of them alternated between passionately kissing and Elise laying powerless and moaning into one of his ears. And just like that the cycle of her incredibly sexy moans inciting new lust into him and thus inciting new lust into her continued uninterrupted as she rode him for four hours…

That was fucking awesome! Elise was laying next to him unconscious, the sun was just about to come up and he also fell asleep. They both missed the scene of the sunrise shining its golden rays into his plain hospital room, onto the walls and their bodies. Elise’s disheveled hair glowed brightly and helped illuminate her mostly exposed body in a mixture of golden lights, as Joe hogged most of the sheets.