《Hero Scout》Chapter 16 - Ah, Shit.
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They emerged into a church, an old nun with a broom peering up across pews filled with dust and webs.
"Hello?" She called out, managing to stare right through a demon, an alien, and a gigantic wolf. Kenji wondered why this situation sounded so much like the beginning of a joke.
"Just here to pray, miss," Kenji called out, grasping the alien's hand before she could do anything. With piercing purple eyes she stared at him sharp as a razer and flickered Kenji's hand away.
"Are you...blind, miss?" Kenji said, stalking closer and smiling brightly just in case. Personally, if such company had appeared before him, he'd pretend there was nothing wrong either. Still, he wanted to get close enough to stop her from ringing that gigantic bronze bell in the corner in case she was pretending, even if it looked cracked and unused.
"Afraid so. We're closed you know, no alms being handed out today. Not unless you can eat dust," old lady chuckled, Kenji joining her with Arthur's own bright laughter. Behind him the large wolf guffed a hoarse giggle, Hena having to punch it in the side to make it stop.
"Oh, did you hear that?" The little woman said clutching her broom.
Having a soft spot for defenceless old ladies, Kenji took her hands in his own.
"A bit of dust fell from the rafters, how about I escort you somewhere safe. Until the priest can arrive and look at the damage," he said, pulling her away and into a side room. The little room had an equally little bed, table, single chair and half-filled wine bottle. Kenji poured her a granny sized class.
"Thank you kindly, young man. Who are you, if I might ask?"
"Just a traveller ma'am. Here to help a little, then move on."
"So you'll be heading to the adventurer guild then will you?" the old lady sounded concerned, even as Kenji pushed the class into her hands and steered her into a seat.
"I might, why? Worried a monster might bite off one of my fingers?" Knowing it was wrong, Kenji rose his middle finger just to check and made a funny face. Yet her milky white eyes continued to stare into nothingness, and Kenji was left feeling mildly ashamed.
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"I'm worried one of the other adventurers might stick a knife in your back," the old lady said as she downed her wine in one gulp. "I'd join the Golden Goose if I were you, their leader has both a spine and a heart open to good. Unlike the Headless Hunters, no sir, that lot doesn't touch anything without the intention of making at least a few silvers," leaning closer, she whispered low, "and I've heard terrible rumours. That they take more than the regulated contracts, practically mercenaries in how they act!"
Kenji stared, dumbstruck, as the woman muttered a prayer and a burning eye appeared in her forehead.
"Thank goodness, to think the old Blessing of [Sight] still works even at this age. Praise the Everseeing, my boy" she waited until he had done so, Arthur's mind quite pleased by the opportunity. "Wow, you really are a good looking one, aren't you?" She added, pinching Arthur's cheek.
"I must be going, thank you for your time. Sorry to have come on the wrong day," Kenji pulled away to the door. Halting as the woman raised a golden coin.
"You should be more careful, newcomer. Tariak is not a town for the weak hearted. Better keep your purse strings closed, eh?" she flipped him back the coin, Kenji finally taking a moment to even realise Arthur's armour had a hidden compartment for coinage at all.
"I'll do that. You can call me Kenji by the way, it was a pleasure meeting you."
With that, Kenji slipped away to meet the others.
"So. We need to go before the nun comes back- where is Hena?" Kenji peered around, finding only a big wolf and alien in his current retinue. There was the distinct lack of a sulphuric smell, dark horns and death threats that he had become so used to over the last half an hour.
"She left. Said they would track her, told us to...trust you," grumbled the wolf. Kenji pulled his cheeks up and forced a nod.
"Yeah, protect you. Just make sure to tell me if she comes back right?" Because she would, most likely with others of the 18 in tow. To 'harvest' the heroes like Kenji had made up. With the high probability of these two becomings [A] grade heroes with some serious personality changes, that was a certainty.
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Clapping his hands together, Kenji tried to ignore the aliens stare.
Because before he could worry about anything, he had to avoid that famous peasant fear he had heard about in high school.
"Let's start but looking normal. I know you can big wolf, but what about you Mrs Purple?"
"My name, is Calehandradica," Mrs Purple snapped. "And I cannot change an inch of my perfect body. So please, attempt to keep your urine in that potato sack you call 'pants'."
Wow, what a dick, Kenji thought. Yet unable to express that she was making fun of a dead boy's attire, he just got back at her by shamelessly staring at her silk covered thighs until she grumbled and turned away.
"Stop staring," She muttered.
"Not until we figure something out. How about that nun getup over there?" Staring at her shapely behind, Kenji pointed at a hook with a spare nun robe. Opening and closing her mouth many times, blushing dark purple, Mrs Purple strode over with long legs and snatched the getup off the hook.
"The indignity..." She hissed, soon enveloped beneath many folds of cloth that thoroughly obstructed all scandalous body parts from view. Kenji was mildly disappointed.
"Hey, I'm just doing my job as your teacher. Can't have my latest hero pupils get crucified can I?" Kenji grinned, starting to enjoy the perks of his role."You next big wolf, Violet here changed and I know you can too."
Violet cocked her head to one side, yet didn't seem to mind her nickname.
"This is my true form," the great wolf said, raising her noble head high.
"That is a great big target for every arrow, spear and magical blast in a half-mile radius," Kenji corrected her. "So how about choose something less suspicious, and smaller? Unless you want to pretend to be our mount-" the giant wolf's growl cut Kenji off, the baring of fangs making him start to sweat.
"A joke! In poor taste, but supposed to reduce the tension of me being rather freaked out right now! So if you don't want a mob of pitchfork and fire waiving peasants trying to drive you out of town, I suggest you hurry up."
Growling louder, the wolf contorted wildly back into the form of an animalistic girl. Huffing she crossed her arms, staring with angry moons right into Kenji's soul.
"And...that?" Kenji whispered, pulling his smile only wider and pointing at the huge moon still hanging over her head like a personal disco ball. Groaning, as if this were something truly despicable, she snapped her fingers and the moon vanishing along with its silvery aura.
"I want to talk about what that aura does while we travel," Kenji said starting towards the door, the two girls following reluctantly behind him.
"It reduces magic damage. Where are we going?" the wolf girl said, covering her chest as she gave Kenji an odd look.
"Well first, my name is Kenji," Kenji said, bowing low. "Secondly, I apologise for the mild harassment before, but it's rather important we get moving quickly. And lastly, who are you, my dear lady?" Arthur snuck that last line in, yet the way the wolf girl became all flustered Kenji gave the dead boy's mind a mental high-five.
"Tenko. Where are we going?" Tenko frowned, lips pulling back to reveal sharp teeth.
Kenji would take them to the only place such outlandish creatures could conceivable thought not to be a threat to the town. The only area where, according to various games, other races (especially the beautiful ones) would be more accepted.
"We're going to a place populated by the uh....' ladies of the night' as it were."
"A Brothel? I would sooner cut my throat out," Violet said, purple eyes flaring dangerously.
"I said guild, didn't I? Yes the Guild, the Adventurer guild! There we can stary your journies to becoming great heroes," Kenji said with clasped hands. Regretting missing this chance to see what a fantasy world brothel would look like.
"Well, if that's all you should have just said so," Violet mumbled, pulling away from the long strands of hair that obstructed her face and patted down her thick nun's robe.
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