《Is Heaven Supposed to Be Like This?!》16. Fluffy?
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“Well then....Ain’t this horrible.....”
i said while letting out a sigh while i collapsed on a bench that’s other half is nowhere but seen.
truly, how did this happen?
well, i’m not going to go for a flashback, too tired for that...
as for our current location.....its an abandoned part of hell.
nothing can be seen aside from the ruins of collapsed buildings.
no living being is sight. no Humans, Demi-Humans, Angels and Demons.
to put it simply, this place is empty aside from ‘us’.
now then, the problem is that ‘us’......are too many.
i take a look behind me, and see a dog Demi-Human on all fours waging its tail toward me, an Elf who is glaring at me and a ‘Demon’ who is giving me a sexy smile.
i take a look on my left, and see Than, A cat Demi-Human who seems to be purring and a twin pair of Angels with black wings.
now then, i take a look toward the troublesome side, and that’s my right.
i see the Trap bastard that should die, and even more Demi-Humans of all kinds.
the cute Squirrel Demi-Humans with their orange hair, The hot and sexy Wolf Demi-Humans who have their hair colored blue with a hint of black and, let us not forget, the chubby in a good way Bear Demi-Humans! heck, there’s even some Spider Demi-Humans!
those just creep me out, no matter how their upper, human bodies look hot.
now then, why am i troubled by all of this?
its a harem! right?
nope!
its not my harem at least!
its all that fucking bastard’s harem!!
and i can’t freaking believe he’s sending ‘em to find me?!
every time i take five steps, i encounter one as if i’m in a dungeon crawling game!
i don’t like this at all!
why should i take care of his harem?!
to begin with, how can he send some of his harem to retrieve another part of his harem?
no, no, there’s something wrong here, i can’t even kill them....so my only choice is making them join me.
now then, if i make them join me, doesn’t that mean that guy’s harem gets smaller?
indeed.
but here’s a problem.
right now, i’ve somehow got through it by using fraud, blackmail, threats and bribery.
but! i’m out of guns, which are my form of bribery for most of the military idiots.
i’ve used the Trap bastard and Than, who seemed to be quite popular with his harem, and threaten to hurt them....although, that was a mistake on my part since Than was drooling through it all.
thank god these guys are idiots.
now then, if they joined me, aren’t they my harem?
of course not.
they’re here for Than and that Trap.
i won’t even bother remembering their names, since our current relationship is so shallow, that they’ll probably betray me--not that they trust me, as soon as we face the God of Ranks.
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all i’m asking is, why bother?
i mean, all i wanted was get to E rank.....why is he sending assassins after me?
well, its probably to get his harem back...
well, no matter, i need to make my way through this and finally reach his place.
By the way, Than’s been ignoring all of their conversational advances so far, and they’re treating it as normal for her to ignore them...
if i remember correctly, didn’t Than act like a child and try to go for a ‘cool’ entrance and then pout like a child?
“It can’t be.....does she think its cool......?”
i post this question, but noticing that all of them are ignoring my existence, i quickly stand up from my place and quicken my pace toward the hill that is barely visible from the bench.
“Than, you sure its that way?”
although i suspect Than to betray me as well.....but i trust her the most out of all these people to ask her for directions.
ahh~ if only i have a GPS...
the after life could use some taste of the human’s world tech....
most of all, i miss the internet!
i want my anime~
that aside, i totally didn’t listen to Than’s answer.....
well, what the hell, it must be this way, right?
now, now, it’s not like i’m triggering my own death flag!
since most anime before i died had scenes like this, and it always introduced the hottest heroine in ‘em!
“TO THE HILL!!!”
woah?!
i accidentally screamed that....
ehh~ i’m so embarrassed......
no! haven’t i learned my lesson last time?!
i must tough it up!
“I-i c-c-can.......M-my v-virgin detector s-s-senses a d-disturbance in th-the force!!!”
i kick up my feet in a hurry and ran with all my might toward the top of the hill.
“Come on! let there be a girl there!! i can’t let myself be embarrassed in front of my temporary allies! not that i consider that freaking trap to be one! minus the trap! all traps should just die!!!”
as my true thoughts leaked out of my mouth, i jumped from atop of the hill, which had a canyon on the other side.
i-i....didn’t expect this to be here...
“W-W-WOOAAAAAaaaaaaahhh!!!”
I-ITS FINE!
I-I’M ALREADY DEAD!!
I-ITS JUST PAIN!!!
OH, HOW I HATE PAAAIIIIIIN!!!!
“T-THAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAN!!!!!!!”
just as i shouted that on top of my lungs, and as i was nearing the ground of my moment death, i remembered something quite simple........i’m a ghost.
phew~ i don’t have a physical body!
and here was my thought of using Than as a cushion, but that all went for nothing!
well, it wouldn’t even fit me even if she did jump along....
“Maaa~aaaster~!”
oh...
isn’t that Than’s voice?
now, now, i’m only guessing this....since she’s the only one who calls me master.
all those bastards still call that God as their Master.
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muhahaha! i don’t need your help anymore, Than!
and with that, soundlessly, without even leaving a dust cloud, i landed on my two feet from a height over 1000m.
-Squash!!
--Ploop!
i take a look behind me, where a few weird, and unsafe sounds just came from.
T-this is....
“H-hey.....c-couldn’t you actually use....umm....your wings....to fly......?”
i heard no answer from the blob of flesh that is in front of me.
i refuse to describe it more than a blob of flesh.
i’d rather have a tentacle, furry double rape scene at this moment than describing this horrible flesh blob!
“Hehehehe~ r-rather....i’d want to see that anytime~!!”
---Ploop!!
the blob of disgusting flesh began moving around...no, its more like jumping and hopping from place to place.
isn’t she supposed to regenerate....?
“Oi, Than!”
“Yes Master?”
“Woah?!”
I jumped in surprise toward the blob of moving flesh.
in the end, Than was behind me all this time.
is that her favorite spot, beside my back?
either way, i’m drowning in this disgusting blob of flesh.....
“Gooouugh!”
s-some of the flesh is getting inside of my mouth!!
no that i have any.
its getting out of my system just like it got in.
really, is this what they call a force of habit?
“Woah.....isn’t this the tentacle of lust?!”
exclaimed Than in surprise.
its weird.
its the first time i’ve seen her impressed over something.
and this thing, its so disgusting...
“Oh....is that you....Fluffy?”
just as Than said something unusual, the Blob began jumping even more, knocking me side over side.
i have no idea how this guy is effecting me, even though i’m making sure to have everything pass through me...
either way, whats with the weird name of ‘tentacle of lust’?
i can only think of this blob as something out of an eroge.....but this is flesh....red, soaked in blood, flesh...
“Ahh~ Fluffy! i missed you so much~”
I hear Than’s happy voice, and the blob begins to run amok, tossing me side to side.
ahh.....if i wasn’t a ghost.....i’d totally throw up...
if i don’t concentrate on anything....i get motion sickness....
quick.....lets think of pie.....
oh? not pie the number, but actual pie....
....i think....i said this before.....but i don’t know pie....like totally, i only know.....3.04.....its that....right?
.........who cares.......i must........think of pie..........!
....stra......berry......pie.......oran....ge........p.....ie........”Apple.....pie!”
with enough thoughts about pie, i quickly dash out through the blob!
even though it can knock me inside of itself, i can still go through it!
what a weird sensation, going through something that was knocking you from side to side a phew seconds ago.
not only that, its made from flesh!
this is truly disgusting.
soon, the casual light of the bright stars came through my nonexistent eyes....
....yes, hell does have stars...they use ‘em as lamps....
so as i was saying! Than was hugging that disgusting, flesh blob while shouting “Fluffy!” like a horny girl.
not that i’ve seen a horny girl before, but thats what i imagine.
but i can say for sure, she isn’t saying with as much energy as when she begs me to torture her...
.....i-its not like i’m jealous!
all the ‘gang’ come down from the hill as well, and they all walk toward the blob.
correction, everyone except for the trap.
he’s walking toward me.
the only guy beside me in the ‘group’ is walking toward me.
go away.
i’d better have that spider girl near me than you.
no...i’d better have that disgusting blob swallow me again than have you near me!
i refuse to breath the same air as someone who gave up his manliness.
a traitor of men!
a backstabber.
“Hey.”
don’t talk to me!
i sneak a quick glance at him, making sure he doesn’t notice.
and that bastard....he’s playing with his hair!
stop doing it!!
you’ll look even hotter!!!
i refuse to feel anything from you!!!!
m-my sensor is reacting!!!!!
“F-FALSE ALAAARRRMMMM YOU BAAAASTAAAAAARRRRRDDD!!!!!”
“Huh?!”
oh shit.
did i just say that out loud?
i must change the subject!
“H-hey! ahh...well......”
Fast!
i must think of a topic changer!!
i can’t really talk about the weather since there is no such thing in the after life!!!
dammit Gods, why do you keep messing with me?!
is it really that hard to change the weather!?
“Ahh....errr.......ah! w-why are they a-all approaching that blob....of flesh.....?”
i quickly said toward the guy, without facing him.
he quickly answers “Oh. so you see him like that as well? it seems that all the girls back in the castle seem to see it as a slime....something that only woman seem to see.”
“S-slime....?”
“Yeah. a pink slime. he’s actually quite popular.....he’s Lord Thanatus’ pet.”
“I-is that so...”
“By the way, ever wondered about why its name has lust in it?”
“W-why....?”
i quickly say that, and shoot another glance at him.
“Because it gives a woman the ultimate pleasure that no other being can give her! its so popular, that only three of them are out in the wild!! just selling one can give you a fortune that can rivals that of gods!!!”
he quickly says and licks his red lips.
i freeze at seeing that expression, and his smile goes even deeper, and says “You’re finally looking at my face! now, it wont be soon and we can have eye contact!!” and spouts a line that only heroines are supposed to use.
i quickly move my head to the other side, covering my face with my hands.
i-it can’t be....i’m not blushing.....right?!
n-not toward this........not toward this thing!!
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