《Epiphany of the Weak》⦓ 34 ⦔ A Faint Hope I Will Cling To
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"Ava!" called a blonde boy.
I turned around, my Aegis dissolved into thin air. A thick coppery scent tickled my nose as blood dribbled down my long jet-black hair. Cold, wet, I stared at my hand.
Ah, I did kill those people. The realization didn't perturb me as much. My mind accepted it readily and I for one were grateful for it. The chilling hollow sensation in my chest had replaced what emotions I felt before. Strange, yet, welcomed. The bloody horror surrounding me elicited not much of a reaction from me.
Oh, right, the boy. His name was...? I couldn't remember much and my hazy mind and mental state exacerbated the awkward situation I was in. The only memory of him I could remember right then was when he saved me at the outpost. My savior, yes. His gaze held no hatred nor malice. Even someone as emotionless as I was right then could tell he was looking at me sympathetically.
Still, his gaze was like a warm balm, so I held it, not wanting to break away.
From first glance, the blonde boy's bandaged forehead and a patch of blood that painted half of his hair stood out to me. White cloth wrapped his left shoulder, and right then, I could tell the boy was in immense pain.
He narrowed his eyes and shook his head. Why was he here? For what purpose did the boy come, away from the veritably congenial space further inside? I didn't understand. The look he had in his eyes changed to something more akin to desperation, mixed with a hint of pessimism. Did he worry about me? Why...?
Questions after questions entered my mind. I wanted to ask him everything I wanted to know. The boy called my name again. He traipsed over a few mutilated bodies to get to me, his shoes soaked in thick blood.
"Ava. Where... are you going?" the blonde boy said with a strained voice. Ah, he was in too much pain. Normally, looking at someone like this would make me feel sad, but...
I couldn't feel anything.
"...Why are you here?" I asked, my voice came out as if I wanted to cry.
No, who decided that? I didn't feel sad at all, not in the slightest.
"I could say the same to you, Ava," the boy said with a thin smile. "I... I don't know how to say this, but, you've changed."
"Changed? I... I don't remember you. I want to find my parents."
"By yourself?"
This sentence somewhat miffed me. So what if I wanted to find my parents by myself. He wouldn't care, would he? No one cared to protect me. I suffered, clinging to the faint hope that someday, I could meet my parents once again.
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Staying here wouldn't change anything.
Nothing would happen if I stay here—
"I'm sorry."
The blonde boy patted my back as he crouched to my eye level. Without hesitation, he ripped a long piece of his shirt's sleeve and soaked the blood sousing my head. I opened my mouth to ask him—
"I'm sorry. I know it's not enough. I know... you must be mad at everyone right now. We failed to protect you. So... if you take a step outside, no one would reprimand your action."
"...Eh?" I stared blankly at him. A strange emotion welled up inside.
"I'll follow you if that's your decision. You want to find your parents, right? Then, I'll help you."
"Why...?"
Suddenly, tears started to well in my eyes, and I couldn't help but clench my fists, various emotions swirled in my chest.
"Why are you doing this? You don't gain anything by helping me."
The blonde boy laughed a dry laugh. He smiled, and momentarily, I could see him wincing in pain. Strange. This boy ignored his own safety and injuries, for me? For my sake?
"Do I need to gain anything every time I do something? You're hurt, and I wouldn't forgive myself if I didn't try to find you. Perhaps there's more to it, but... right now, this is what I truly feel."
"I don't understand," I muttered with a trembling voice. "You're hurt too. What are you? How can you be... so selfless?"
The strange emotion welling up inside gripped my heart, and it felt like it would burst at any moment. What was this? Stop, I didn't like what was happening to me.
"Ava, can you wait a bit longer? I know you want to find your parents as soon as possible, but, you're not prepared yet. At least clean yourself and pack some stuff before you go. Ah, wait, I'll help with that."
Tears streaked my cheeks and before I knew it, I wrapped my arms around him and cried. I cried and cried, unwanting to let go of him. His warmth thawed my heart and I welcomed it.
"...This is another promise I make to you," the blonde boy said in the end, almost a whisper.
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Despite everything that had happened to the base, it still stood strong. Grandpa's group—those who were able—cleared the area and tended to the civilians taking cover in the cafeteria.
They all appeared quite busy, so I merely watched from the side for a few minutes. The hallway had fewer people after some time, so I jogged to my room.
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"Hope!"
I said his name out loud and he yelped from surprise. In his hands were two seemingly heavy backpacks, packed with essentials and supplies adequate for a few days. We had informed Grandpa about our plan, and he wasn't pleased with it.
Grandpa refused to let us go, but that wouldn't stop us, wouldn't it? I had enough. From here on out, I would make my own choices.
Oh, for the record, I'd bathed and changed to a new, plain blue collared shirt and a baggy shorts. My hair tied into a ponytail.
"Hope, Hope! Ayesha said she wants to meet us."
"Hm?" Hope thought for a moment. "We have to go right now though. If we wait any longer, Boss would send someone after us. It's now or never."
"Oh, if you say so!"
Hope had changed his clothing and bandages too. After checking our backpacks for the second time, he slung them over his shoulder and moved out of the room. I followed, trotting to his side as we planned our escape.
Normally, I would feel quite nervous about doing something like this. Going against Grandpa wasn't something I'd intended nor wished to do. But I had made my choice. If push came to shove, I had my Aegis.
"...Where are you two going?"
We were at the base's parking lot when the girl's voice caught my attention. Standing a few meters behind us was Ayesha, looking at us with a disparaging gaze.
Seeing her like this made me shiver. Ayesha was not one to wear such an expression, at least, not when we were together before.
"No, I'll answer that. You want to help her find her parents," added Ayesha. "And what exactly can you two do on your own?"
"...But staying here won't help me find them," I spoke up.
Ayesha's gaze softened at my words. It was true, she knew this.
"...Please, don't go," Ayesha muttered in the end.
Her soft voice managed to elicit a pang of guilt to well inside me. She didn't want us to go, so much so that she waited for us here by herself. For all I knew, Ayesha was strict to herself when it came to rules and orders laid out by Grandpa.
In a sense, her stopping us was something I'd not expected. An interlude to her duties, albeit an unwarranted one.
"I have to," I replied. "Mommy and Daddy are waiting for me out there. Grandpa won't find them, so it's up to me. Are you coming too, Ayesha?"
She bit her lip. As much as she wanted to help, I was afraid she'd to discard her wish. Ayesha reached for her sling bag and pulled out two scarfs—red and blue.
"I can't come with you, even if I want to. But here, it's cold outside especially during a night like this."
Ayesha handed the red scarf to me and the blue scarf to Hope. An honest act of kindness. She couldn't do more for us, but even so, I felt grateful. Ayesha was a kind girl and if I wanted to have a sister, I would like her to be someone like Ayesha.
"And... I have a wireless earpiece for you, Hope. I'll inform you about the organization's movement from time to time."
Hope took the pair of round black earphones and fitted it to his ears.
"...Leaving your post like this is not minor misconduct, Hope. There's a chance that you'll not be accepted back into Le Morte," warned Ayesha with a stiff gaze.
"...I know. I'll think about it when that time comes," said Hope, attempting to shrug off the warning with a smile.
"Princess Aya. She can't meet you again if you're not here."
Princess Aya? I looked at Hope, and he winced upon hearing the girl's name. Who was Princess Aya?
"We're friends. I'm sure she'll understand why I'm doing this," said Hope after a few moments of silence.
"Friends... I'm not sure if she sees you as mere friends only," Ayesha muttered under her breath.
Hope didn't hear this as he snugly adjusted his wireless earphones. Ayesha noticed this, and with a palm over her forehead, heaved a heavy sigh.
"Who's Princess Aya?" I asked, tilting my head to the side.
"Ah... she's the granddaughter of Her Majesty, Queen Fortune Sybyll Barnwell. Hence, a princess."
"A princess!"
I'd only read about princesses in storybooks. They did exist after all! Did Princess Aya had castles? Did she dance with a prince at a ball? All sorts of questions flitted into my mind.
And so, we bid goodbye to Ayesha who stared back at us with teary eyes. Her lips parted and promptly closed afterward as if she wanted to stop us from going one final time.
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