《The Aggie Show》CATALOG: (E001 - E010)
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The Following Is a Catalog of Anomalous Things
Categorized for Your Convenience
Level 0: By now, you already have access to these things. Do not lose them. They are paramount to your survival.
Level 1: These are the first things that you should acquire. They are not as important to your continued survival as are other items in this list, but they are essential to bringing an end to the cloud.
Level 2: For use after you have brought about the end of the world. You will need the power to reshape others’ souls as well as your own.
Level 3: Finally, after you are supposedly dead, you will need these things to grow and thrive. I do not know how things will turn out from here. I can not see into the next reality, and I fear that I never will.
The Physical Soul (E001)
Level 2
Once an individual has amassed a substantial and imposing soul of their own, I believe that is when they are able to exhibit “The Physical Soul.” We have seen this before in revenants: creatures who have derived such overflowing power from the cloud that it seeps out of them in the form of a black sludge.
By this time, you will have taken my soul. You will have taken Jack’s soul. You will have reaped the soul of the cloud itself. You will have become the most imposing figure to have ever lived. That is not enough. You see, what allows revenants to “overflow” is not just the magnitude of their spirit, but also the determination. The cloud has no will of its own. It has no feelings – no beliefs – no consciousness. Its soul is invisible even to us because it does not have the will to be seen. Become an ungovernable force: follow every whim, and try to evolve as you see fit. Do not stagnate – this will only dampen your spirit.
Once you perfect this, you will find that the soul is not always fluid. There is one case, as far as I could find, of an individual whose soul was hardened. Her name was Jayden, and she is much older than you and I. She wore a mask, filled to the brim with her overflowing spirit. I have seen her past, as well as your future, and I have noticed a consistency. Both of you learn to do this, and both are manifested as smooth, white ceramic. I do not understand why the rigid soul is always manifested as smooth, white ceramic. That is beyond me. Perhaps you will come to understand why this is.
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El Infierno Godfrey (E002)
Level 0
This should be self-explanatory, so I will not be going into much detail. Before my inevitable death, I will finish writing this text. In the case of my untimely demise, this book will be sent to Gary’s address. If you are reading this, then I am dead. That does not mean that you cannot visit me, however. From where I stand, you already have. This book should be treated as an instruction manual. Follow my instructions. I have seen what must be done in order for you to succeed.
The Typewriter (E003)
Level 1
This is the first of many devices that you will have to construct. The process is quite simple once you have acquired mine and Jack Harley’s souls. As you are aware, mine is the destroyer of souls, and Jack’s is a link to the cloud. You must also be aware that the cloud is many things: A sower of souls – A manager of consciousness – A reaper of humanities. We are most interested in that first one.
First, you must acquire the blood of Jack Harley. Then, you must mix it with my own. As you will soon find, they will kill one another. It does not matter how you do this, but you must keep the fire burning. Keep our spirits alive. Use the blood of any other creature as fuel. Even some plants have souls – isn’t that exciting! There are endless ways to keep our spirits alive, but I do recommend the use of blood
From there, you will have the spirit of evolution. Ingest it. It will attack your body like a virus. You will fall ill. If the dosage is small enough, then you will survive – and I know that you will. From there, it does not matter how, you must extract the lingering spirits from your body once more. It will have become a part of you. Simply insert the spirit into any typewriter. After it has been given the time to ferment, the learned spirit of evolution will obey your command, with the immeasurable power to reap and sow.
Train the device with simple commands at first. During this time, you should begin to exert pressure on Gary while the device grows in power. Once it has set its roots into the universe itself, the time will come to eliminate the cloud and to claim its soul for yourself.
The Laptop (E004)
Level 2
I have witnessed your own future experimentation. In order to streamline this process, I will provide you with a few objects which could benefit from the spirit of evolution.
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Gary’s laptop will, once the spirit of evolution is inserted, learn from its surroundings. It will emulate its world. From what I have seen, when a will more powerful than its own stares into its screen, their soul will be reflected back at them. If they are not prepared to handle being trapped within themselves, they will almost certainly be torn apart from the inside.
The Remote (E005)
Level 2
The remote is another object that ought to be infused with the spirit of evolution. Simply put, the remote will learn two functions: volume and verisimilitude. When the remote is pointed at another soul, you may choose to adjust the volume. Their soul will become more or less outraged in accordance with your selection, and their behavior will become more or less stable.
It is also capable of verisimilitude. By pressing the “power” button, any beloved possession may begin to take on a will of its own using the soul left over by its owner.
Gary (E006)
Level 0
You will always have access to Gary. Gary is a pathetic man who cannot do anything. However, he is our greatest obstacle. Through observation of his place in rebirth, I have witnessed an eerily consistent trend: Gary is always the first one to be reborn. I have also witnessed that those who tend to be reborn later, tend to have an increased risk of fading away forever.
For this reason, it is imperative for your survival that Gary’s soul is destroyed as quickly as possible. In order to destroy one’s soul, you need only to force them into a state of complacency. That is why you will need the spirit of evolution. The remote will be used to relax Gary. The laptop will be used to force him to see himself for what he is – and he will only see himself. From what I have seen, you are guaranteed to outlive him. His soul will be reincarnated once more. Then, he will fade.
Pizza Delivery Uniform (E007)
Level 1
This uniform, which must be retrieved from Danny Shevchuk before his untimely death at the hands of yourself, will be imperative in forcing Gary’s soul into a place of complacency. Once this article is imbued with the spirit of evolution, it will learn of its rightful owner. The cloth will create a duplicate of Danny Shevchuk in the flesh. As far as I understand, Gary and Danny are very close friends – Gary’s soul is resilient. In order to force him into submission, he must bear witness to a prize that cannot be won.
The Orange Crowbar (E008)
Do Not Engage
Please – Avoid this item at all costs. Do not try to trap the thing. Do not try to keep it away from others. Do not engage with this object. I do not know what it is. Through my accounts of the past, I have seen things disappear – this object is a warning sign. Please, stay safe. You are not invincible.
The Red Box (E009)
Level 2:
Alternatively, if you ever come across the orange box, you should acquire it immediately. Do not open the box. Keep it under your protection. Wait for Gary to open it. The spirit of two incomprehensibly old souls are waiting inside. I do not know where the box came from – unfortunately, I do not understand how it functions. It is an ancient thing that does not play by the same rules that we do. There are two spirits trapped inside: Jayden and Khalid. They will try to kill you. Kill Khalid. Let Jayden destroy you. You will come back as a spirit – and a revenant – and something greater.
Muriel MacFarlane (E010)
Level 3:
As far as I’m aware, her soul has been dissolved completely. By the time you will be supposedly dead, her soul will be nowhere in existence. I suspect that she will not be content to lay down and die. She has no faith in death. She will come back as a spirit. Claim her soul as part of your own, just as you claimed Jack’s. She will not bear a physical body – she will not have any blood. However, by this time, you will almost certainly be able to consume another’s soul without the need for such trivialities.
By consuming her soul, you will be doing two things in order to ensure your continued survival. (1): You will be eliminating one of our greatest enemies. Muriel blames me for the pain that she has endured in her life. I do not blame her. She blames you for carrying out my ideals. I do not blame her – she can not be left alive. (2): Her soul is powerful. Not only will you acquire her intuition, but you will also inherit her affinity for one of the fundamental forces. Oh, I wish you good fortune, Aggie!
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