Belch opened her eyes to the dark void of her subconscious. Yes, it was all coming back to her. She had been either blessed or cursed with the presence of a holy figure. But whether the figure was the Gem God or the Devil, she had no clue.

The glowing white figure who claimed to be the Gem God hovered in front of her with lowered brows. This was her third time meeting with the godly figure in this realm, and she didn’t yet understand the benefits he claimed having access to a god gave.

Though, this subconscious realm did influence her while she was awake. She remembered being touched by Aidan and fearing him like how the Gem God said she should. At the time, however, that thought felt natural, hardly superficial like it really was.

What if Belch wanted his brown eyes instead of her green ones? It sounded like a pleasant exchange. Was it wrong to want something like that after living your entire life thinking your own eyes resemble the devil?

Last time, they talked little. She simply killed time in the pool of black liquid, waiting for the moment she woke. Though, through the time resting in the pool, she found herself oddly bonding to it. Far more than she connected with the Gem God. When she first arrived here, the liquid clung to her skin, sticky, thick, and absorbed her glow. However, now it was like the liquid moved with her as if it’d been its own entity.

Since she couldn’t exercise while awake, she took her time here, running and jogging around. At first, the idea sounded impossible. The pool raised a foot high off the ground, and on the first day here, she could barely walk around; her shoes struggled to keep on her feet as the liquid seeped inside. But since the night before, her skin felt repellent. As she ran, the pool in front of her diverged ahead, clearing a path for her to run.

In this realm, her endurance never dwindled. She could run, dive, jump, skip, hop, and roll at will with no consequence to her body. She felt invincible, stronger than she had ever been. And it felt great to move. The past few days—in the awake world—she’d been stationary, waiting for chances to be active that never came. But she also knew that everything here was false, that her feats here meant nothing, nor did anything of value to her actual body. It did, however, clear her mind.

Running straight ahead with the Gem God to her back, she eventually found him in front of her, like taking two thousand steps forward was a hundred steps backward. She figured she’d moved around enough, then sat down. The liquid under her let her sit down on the solid ground before swarming back around her, snuggling her legs.

Am I really making friends with liquid? Belch wondered. She laid her hand down flat on the back, hovering over the pool. The liquid seemed to climb up and into her palm. She lifted, curious, and drank it. Repulsed, she spat out.

Salty! Belch gagged. Never again, lesson learned.

“What are you doing?” the Gem God sighed.

“What is all of this liquid?” Belch asked.

The god gestured his hand, pulling some of the liquid up close, swirling it into a circle, playing it in his hand. “Doesn’t seem like water.”

“So you don’t know?”

“I’ve been to a human conscious before,” he said. He released the liquid from his invisible hold, which dropped down and back into the pool. “Never seen this before.”

“So, what do you know?” Belch asked.

The god frowned. “I don’t like the tone you asked that question. Besides, you haven’t really been asking me questions since I first arrived. What’s that about? You’re not curious at all?”

“What would I need to know?” Belch asked. “If I don’t do as you wish, you’ll kill me, right?”

He nodded. “Yes, I will. So don’t disobey. Consider yourself a hostage. But, I must treat you as an ally as well, so let me help you however I can. Anything you desire, I could help. So long as it’s reasonable.”

She scratched her head. What do I need to know? Or better yet, what do I want to know. Then, it clicked. What she was forbidden to have since birth. A proper one, that was. “I want a name,” she said. She had three now: the number on her head given to her by the tamers, Belch given to her by the other beasts, and the one Aidan most recently gave her, Vessel. But she hated all of them. None of them felt right.

“You have one name you call yourself already,” the Gem God said. “Belch. That’s what you believe to be your name. Am I wrong?”

She shook her head. “I… want a better one.”

“Ahh, sincere,” the god said. “You think there’s a perfect name out there for you, but you don’t quite know what that could be. What makes you think I can grant that wish? Me giving you a name would be no different than Aidan giving you one. No matter what, you wouldn’t find it right. Would you like me to try anyway?”

She shook her head, defeated.

The Gem God sighed, lowering down to hover only a few inches above the pool, crossed legs. His image reflected off the liquid under him, though very faint. “Though, I suppose I could help you find the name you desire.”

“How?” Belch perked up.

“You seem to think there’s another name out there for you,” he said. “It’s common for parents to name their children directly after birth. So what if your parents had given you a name after you were born? That could spark some interest in your soul, wouldn’t it?”

She lowered her brows, skeptical. “I don’t have any parents,” she said. “I was taken at birth and never saw them again.”

The god grinned. “I can show you your birth,” he said, inching closer to meet her eyes. “Are you ready?”

“Show me my birth? I don’t remember being born. I don’t even remember most of my life!”

Laughter erupted from the god. “Your memories and experience are two different things. You don’t remember being born, but that doesn’t change the fact you experienced it,” he explained. He reached under his shirt, bringing out a blindingly white necklace, giving off a light brighter than his skin. An amulet of pure light in his hands brought to Belch. “Grab on, let me show you.”

She nodded, reluctant at first to follow along. It seemed absurd that anyone could remember their birth, like a feat someone claimed to do to impress others. Hell, even some beasts claimed they could, saying they ripped themselves out of their mother, fighting the doctor while only a few minutes old. That seemed unlikely, though Belch wondered how she was after being born.

She grabbed onto the amulet with both of her hands, feeling the light overtake her.

“Close your eyes,” the Gem God said. “Try to remember your first memories of being born. When you open your eyes—”

She followed his instructions, though his voice banished. Silence… then crying. Wailing. Loud and obnoxious, it was so close to her ears. It wasn’t long before she realized that it was her who was weeping. She opened her eyes to see a giant in front of her, wearing a blue face mask with short brown hair hold her in his hand. Belch was reliving the moment of her birth, though she had no control over her body. Like a movie, but projected from her very eyes.

Something pounded on the outside walls. The unrelenting hail struck the windows and walls—tap tap thud thud tap. So brutal and agonizing, Belch feared the window would shatter with how loud it was. But her crying seemed to drown much of that out.

Belch had always hated the hail.

The doctor snipped a tentacle from her stomach, wiping her stomach down with a cloth. He eventually handed her to a chubby man, who held her up to his chest.

“It’s a girl,” the doctor said.

“A girl!” the man holding her said. He laughed, turning his head to the side. Though Belch’s eyes were stuck the other way, her head tucked to the man’s breast. “That’s great!”

Who are these people? Belch thought. A part of her wanted to say that nobody had ever loved her, especially her parents. The tamers always claimed that no parents would love a beast for a child and that they were happy to be rid of them, that pretending they were never born was better than living with a literal monster. Was this man holding her… her father? If so, when did he start hating her? He hasn’t looked at my eyes yet.

Yes, Belch, she spoke to herself, just wait until they see who you really are.

The one she presumed was her father had a scruffy beard and an open grin. His clothes under his wide neck were more like the noblemen Modai and Kingo than anybody she ever saw in Dork. Bushy eyebrows too.

Belch couldn’t even blink in this form. Everything had played precisely how it really happened. Perhaps there was a legitimacy to what the Gem God claimed. This could be the first few moments after her birth. But, she didn’t put it past him to facilitate this entire thing in her head. He was a god, after all.

The father brought her over to the woman on the bed. She looked fatigued and weakened, like she had just lost a violent duel. She couldn’t even reach for Belch, having to have her placed on her chest instead. Belch’s crying suddenly came to an end.

This must be my mother.

She had the same pale-white skin she had, with the exact same long black hair, though Belch’s had been a tad longer in the present day. Her smooth face and blue eyes were beautiful. Belch took a lot of her appearance from her mother, but the thing separating the two was the eyes, the difference between a beautiful woman and a horrendous beast.

But, the way her weakened arms wrapped around her back, Belch couldn’t help but feel adored; cherished instead of belittled, loved instead of feared. And she looked directly into her eyes. Belch was crying, though only through her eyes. What’s going on, she thought. This isn’t how this is supposed to be.

He’s lying to me! This isn’t how it was. It can’t be!

“She’s so…” Mother hesitated, slowly lifting her head to look at Belch’s father. “Precious…”

The father laughed. “About as precious as you,” he said, walking over. He knelt down to the mother’s side. Belch feared him for some reason, despite appearing and sounding friendly. In her baby mind, she clung to her mother, preferring her touch over all else.

Behind the father, a curtain draped over the window outside. She was terrified of the hail. It felt so foreign to her, new and obtrusive. At that moment, the hail came down like rampant thunder.

“Good news,” Father said. He pressed his hand down on Mother’s hand on top of Belch. Their touches together were warm. “King Ranun has finally won!”

“He has?” Mother asked, gaping. “When?”

“This morning,” Father said. Ranun, that is somebody the Gem God is trying to get me to go to. The name was too obvious not to be orchestrated by the Gem God. This dream had to be fake… “He captured Falcon Hill at sunrise. King Nolan is dead. Ranun is now King of Soucrest.”

“This is…” Mother started, trailing off. She seemed on the brink of exhaustion

“Incredible,” Father said. “We can finally request a full pardon!”

Mother smiled, the purest face in existence. Her tiny arms reached up to touch her lips.

“Our little angel is born the same day Ranun is crowned and the first day of Spring. We may be blessed with fortune.”

Mother put another hand on her back, snatching her extended arm, rubbing gently. She sighed, exhausted.

This isn’t right! Belch thought. Where is the hatred!

“You should write to your father,” Father said. “He should know.”

“Even with how much he hates you?” Mother said, perking up. She struggled to keep awake.

Father shrugged. “He can hate me as much as he wants, but he loves you. And he’ll love her too.” Father rubbed the back of her head. “Even if I’m the father.”

“He thinks you kidnapped me,” Mother smiled. “But you’re right. Ever since my mom passed, he has had a hole in his heart that needs filling.”

As Mother caressed her, holding her close, Belch couldn’t decide if the emotions she felt were from Belch the baby or the present-day Belch. She had her thoughts but not her body. And if feelings were a part of thoughts, well, then Belch was weeping.

She refused to believe this was real. How could it be? The mention of Ranun, the lack of hatred from her parents, it was like the Gem God was omitting something important.

Steps on the floor behind. A third person. The doctor. “Excuse me,” he said. “I would like to do some tests if you don’t mind.”

The mother obliged, lifting her warily up in her hands and handing her over to the doctor.

G examined her fingers thoroughly in his hands, counting each one. He looked for flaws, birth defects. But it wasn’t until he lifted Belch into the light and stared into her eyes that he finally found what he was looking for. The doctor’s eyes shuddered, and he lowered his brows.

“When should we move to Soucrest?” Father asked.

“A few weeks,” Mother replied. “Possibly even a Season. I just want her to be healthy. I’m worried the travel would be tough on a newborn.”

“Anything for our princess, my queen,” Father said.

Though her eyes were on the doctor’s own, she could tell that her parents were smiling at each other, oblivious to what the doctor had found. How would they react to finding out their daughter had green eyes?

The doctor turned to the door while the parents continued to talk.

“Where are you going?” Father asked before he could take his second step.

The doctor stopped, turning around to look Father in the eyes. “I got to do some more testing. You should leave for tonight.”

“Are you kidding?” Father lowered a brow. “It’s hailing boulders outside! I can’t go out there; I’ll never make it home. Besides, my wife just gave birth! I want to stay by her side tonight.”

“Fine,” the doctor said, once again turning to the door. “It’s not my job to kick you out.”

“I want to hold our child again,” Father stopped him again. “You are taking her away too fast.”

The doctor sighed, facing the door, eyebrows lowered, and hatred boiled on his face. He calmed himself down before turning back to Father.

“Please,” Father said. “Hand her back to me.”

“As I said, we have to do testing.”

The father stepped closer, past the hospital bed.

“Stop right there,” the doctor commanded. He sighed. “I’m warning you. Let me do my job.”

Father stopped, but it wasn’t until Belch started to cry again that he built the courage to take another step.

The doctor grunted, bringing both eyebrows down before reaching for his pocket. He whipped out a scalpel, pointing at Belch’s father.

“What’s going on!” Father demanded, moving an inch back. He lifted both of his hands in an attempt to de-escalate. “What are you doing with my daughter?”

“What’s happening?” Mother called out from the bed. Belch could see her crying, fearful for what was happening.

Belch was living a nightmare right before her eyes. Even when she questioned the scene's credibility, she couldn’t help but feel personally invested.

“What are you doing with my daughter?” Father asked again.

“I’m a doctor,” he said. “Day in, day out, I help people. It’s my calling, my passion. And, I would be a terrible doctor if I let a beast roam around in the world, wouldn’t I?”

“What are you talking about!” Father raised his voice, shouting. “You’re insane! Hand her back, or so help me—”

“What?” the doctor chuckled. “You don’t seem to understand the situation we are in here. You two are foreigners here, runaways. You’re telling me you went into this birth not knowing simple dork policy? All beasts are to be taken away and put in the care of proper tamers. It’s my duty to take her away.”

“For what!” Father asked. “What makes her a beast to you?”

“The eyes of the Devil,” the doctor spat.

“Excuse me?” Father grimaced, exasperated.

“You’re unaware? Typical of foreigners to be ignorant. You come to our land, think you are above our laws, and when they apply to you, you complain? If you were native here, you would be thanking me for what I’m doing.”

“Stealing children?” Father asked. He took a bold step forward.

Suddenly, the point of the scalp was to Belch’s infant head. She was the doctor’s hostage. “Come any closer, and she dies.”

“Bastard, I’ll kill you!”

“Come try, fatty,” the doctor said.

Father scoffed. He was… frozen. He didn’t move, afraid that he would die by reaching for her. “Are you… going to kill her?”

The doctor shook his head. “She’ll be raised and cared for, properly tamed and controlled. Though, you’ll never be allowed to see her.”

“This is bullshit!” Father hissed. “She’s human like you and me!”

“This child, human?” the doctor scoffed with scorn deep into his voice. “It may look human, but trust me, when it grows up, it will eat and devour every human in its path. Even the very parents who conceived it.”

“That’s insane!” the father yelled. “That’s the craziest thing I’ve ever heard!”

“Calm down—”

“Give her back!” Father’s voice cracked. A few tears rolled down his cheek. “I’ll take that responsibility.”

“A beast like this can only be tamed by well-trained officials,” he said. “Not rich, entitled men, nor weak women born into privilege.” For as crazed as he came off, he genuinely believed he was taking away one of the Devil’s spawns.

But her parents didn’t believe it? Throughout all of her life, she thought her parents gave her up willingly and that they didn’t love her. But here she was, being taken, and they were infuriated. Belch’s mother wept from the bed, barely able to look her daughter’s way. She never expected her parents to love her, always assuming the opposite.

I hate this! Belch about screamed, though not like she could if she tried. She was simply in a shell of her former self, looking through her own helpless eyes.

“Please,” Father tried again. “We’ll leave this country tomorrow, I swear.”

“Fool,” the doctor said plainly. “I have my morals. Javias’ Spit, I’ll carry out his will, purging Valoria of Devils at their spawn!”

“Bastard!” Father took another step forward, followed by another.

Suddenly, Belch started wailing. Her infant eyes started squinting, going red. Then, the pain set in. The right of Belch’s head gashed to the doctor’s scalpel, stunning Father in front of him. She could feel the blood drip down to her cheek. Over her own screams, she couldn’t hear Father’s curses or Mother’s terrified shrieking.

“Any closer,” the doctor said. “And I’ll kill her.”

Father dropped to his knees, helpless to do anything in this situation. Why can’t you save me? Belch wondered. She understood a father who hated her child, not batting an eye to what was happening, but a father who supposedly loved her? He could talk but not act?

“A word of advice,” the doctor started. “Have another child, forget all about this one. Don’t even consider it yours. If you think this is injustice, go back to Soucrest, where Devils run among the common man. Maybe you’ll be luckier than you are now.”

The doctor turned away, heading to the door. Belch still cried in his arms. Through the small gap between his torso and his right arm, Belch saw her mother crying. The door slammed behind, cutting off her last moment sight of her mother. Her crying eventually ceased as she felt herself running out of breath. Only the terrible sound of hail remained.

She closed her eyes.

Belch gasped, opening her eyes to see the Gem God in front of her, frowning. Her knees buckled under her, dropping her. The dark liquid under her didn’t depart from beneath her, catching and cushioning her fall.

“That was,” the Gem God trailed off. He looked around the empty void. He sighed. “Unsettling.”

Belch took a hard look at her hands, regaining control of her current body. These hands had touched both her parents when they were so small. The reflection in the liquid showed a small reminder of her mother’s face, with hardly any of her father: black hair, pale skin, a similar thin nose.

“Are you alright?” the Gem God asked.

“Be honest with me…” Belch said. “What was false, if not all of it?”

“False?” the god looked offended.

Belch nodded. “Tell me the truth. Did that… happen just like that?”

The Gem God nodded. “Those were your true memories. What you lived and experienced. If I would have faked it, I would have given you some arbitrary name like Lourna or Delorna”

He seemed truthful enough. Dammit, she thought. “This complicates things.”

“Why is that?”

“Because now I want to find my parents,” Belch said. She grinned past the sadness, the surreal feeling of being stripped from her mother’s arms. Her eyes shook, but they kept on the god in front of her. She knew that her old way of life was wrong now. The complacency of being a beast didn’t solve anything. There was still a hole inside her heart. She felt her face craze eying the Gem God.

“I can allow that,” the Gem God said. “I doubt they would have stayed in Dork or went to Dormoor of all places, especially at the time of your birth. There’s no harm in looking. And, if everything’s perfect, maybe your parents went to Soucrest after all, and everything is in our favor.”

Belch nodded. My parents loved me. They really did. And yet…

“They can’t get out of giving me a name.”