《The Party's Tank is a Masochistic Trap》Chapter 1.2: The Vampire Paladin
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"We're so sorry. We're so sorry." A lavender-haired lady in a purple dress had her gloved palms facing Kirin. Her fingers were releasing a glowing mist that slowly healed Kirin's burns.
They were still on the street, watched by concerned citizens who have witnessed what happened.
A red-haired knight in crystal blue armor with a dragon head for a rerebrace and claws for a vambrace had blasted a fireball meant to finish off the nagacore and skysnake. And it might be needless to say, but he missed.
No matter.
Knowing that spell was meant to be a finishing blow gave sense to how much Kirin enjoyed the sensation. It was almost very tempting to ask the caster to do it again.
Speaking of, the knight in question was still in the scene. Regret evident on his lowered head. He was kneeling by Kirin, anxiously gritting his teeth. "What I did to you was unforgivable. Even if I say sorry with the rest of my life's breaths, I won't ever be able to pay for my mistake."
"Hey, now!" Kirin shook his head, a frantic smile hurrying up his sooty face. "I understand it was an accident."
"Indeed it was." Concern twinkled in the lavender-haired lady's eyes. "Still... we could have killed you."
"It's alright, it's alright." Kirin flailed a hand. "Truly, that blast was powerful, but there's no way it could have killed me. Despite how I look now, I'm actually a White Knight."
"A White..." The redhead knight raised his head, his green eyes meeting Kirin's blue. "Fair dame, this'll be but for a fraction of our sin's weight, but, as compensation, allow us to give you all our earnings from this quest."
"Oh no. No, no, no. That won't be necessary."
"But it's only right." The lady closed her hands, then opened them again to cast her spell another time.
"But that's just too much. You've already healed me. Shouldn't that be enough?" Kirin pulled himself up. But as a jolt of pain struck his body, he covered his mouth just in time to prevent a moan from slipping out.
"Wait. You're not fully healed yet."
"It's okay. I'm okay now. You must be really exhausted after dealing with both of those beasts. It'd be best to stop spending your magic." Kirin forced himself to stand, giggling to suppress noises of pleasure egging to out themselves.
"But.... At least let me heal you fully."
"No need, no need." Kirin's knees wobbled.
The redhead's concern had washed his expression down, but after shaking his head and standing up, he looked more resolved and enthusiastic. "I know. We'll bring you to a place to rest. Would that be good?"
"Well..." the trap's wobbly knees faltered.
***
Kirin agreed.
Since he had intended to head to one anyway, he figured to might as well save himself from getting any more lost by letting people accompany. Plus, he knew it might've had taken him a week if he had crawled all the way. Not that he found that out with some previous experience or anything--Anyway! Kirin decided to be rational. Hence the redhead had carried him like a bride as they searched for a place where Kirin could stay.
Through Nagacore Street, they paraded, passing by an iron-fenced field housing a massive stone dungeon spitting out more of those lion-snake hybrids. They then took a left turn to Colossanoles Street, where there were two more dungeons sending massive red and blue lizards towards each other fo war.
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It might be worth noting that it took all the energy left in Kirin's body for him not to gasp every time the red-haired man's armor scraped his skin. Thankfully, after biting his lips shut for fifteen minutes, Kirin finally found relief when they arrived at an apartment doubling as a saloon.
Presently the three of them were seated by a rectangular table. The questers on one side and Kirin on the other. On the surface were plates decked with juicy meat and garnishes, also healing beer in wooden cups. Beside Kirin, his sword was leaning against the sofa's backrest as if it was a human.
"So you must be from the Kingdom of Armor, right?" The redhead leaned against the table and studied the hilt of Kirin's sword. "From what I heard, all graduates there are given allowance to buy power stones for their weapons."
"That's true." Kirin nodded proudly.
"Well then... why is your sword's socket empty?"
Kirin jumped, shame showering upon him. "U-Umm."
"What's the matter?" The lady blinked, slowing down on cutting a slab of steak. "Did my pain nullifying spell run out?"
Kirin mumbled, "I wish it did."
"What?"
"Oh! Nothing?" Kirin quickly shook his head. "It's just...I'm a little embarrassed. I did receive the money to buy a power stone, but..."
"But...?" The questers stared curiously.
Kirin's knees rubbed against each other as his shame grew uncontrollable. "On my way looking for a power stone store, I came across an armor shop and saw the beautiful set I'm wearing right now."
The questers looked at each other.
"So..." The redhead stared at Kirin. "...you spent the money for the power stone to buy that?"
"Oh nooooo." Kirin covered his face. "How embarrassing."
The questers laughed.
"Hey!" Kirin, blushing, looking like a cherry, stood as if to prove a point. "For the record, I am from the Kingdom of Armor! Didn't it make sense for me to buy an armor set instead? And besides! I was able to buy a power stone still!" He pointed at his chest.
A green gem glistened inside its socket.
"It was on sale because... no one... was... wanting to buy it...." Kirin dropped back to his seat and cried with his face flat on the table.
The redhead shook his head, amusement playing in his expression. "You do have a point, but... oh well...."
Kirin leaned back and wiped the tears off his face.
"So!" The lady went on with jabbing her spoon and fork at the meat. "Will you share what you're visiting Swords for?"
"Oh." Being reminded of his purpose let Kirin recover from his embarrassment way faster than a sane person probably would have. "I came here to join a guild so I can take part in missions."
"Ooh! That's exciting! Which ones have you considered so far?"
"Coreiseuse and Excalibur. They're the top guilds here, right?"
The redhead chuckled and looked away.
The lady smirked. "I see. Well, we might just be prejudiced, but we strongly advise against joining any of those two."
"Oh." Kirin blinked twice. "Why is that?"
The redhead crossed his arms and rested on his back. "Coreiseuse is a guild of cheaters. The only reason they're 'the biggest and most powerful' is because they only accept easy quests."
The lady used her fork to slice a cake in half. "See, there's not an objective way of identifying whether or not a quest is hard. Hence, guild scores are counted via number of quests completed."
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"Coreiseuse is infamous in the knight community for turning down difficult requests or leaving them unfinished. All they care about are numbers."
"Oh." Kirin lowered his head. "That's horrible. How about Excalibur then?"
"Bunch of airheads." The redhead scoffed. "Sorry for sounding so hostile, but it's the truth. The only reason people join that guild is because the name sounds cool."
"I can see that." Kirin rubbed his chin. "Wait. Now that I think about it. Since you guys were doing a quest, that means you belong to a guild too, right?"
"The one that's meant to be on top." The redhead grinned.
"Harpe." The lady flicked her fork as if it was a wand. "That's the name."
"Say! Why don't you join our guild?"
"Hmm." Kirin closed his eyes. "But I've never really heard of your guild before."
"We can tell you all about it!"
Kirin smiled. "Well, I have just one important question really."
"Shoot!"
"On a scale of one to ten, how painful can quests get?"
The questers both looked with earnest eyes, then answered, "Eleven."
"We mentioned Coreiseuse rejects difficult requests, right? If you're wondering where those quests end up, your answer's right in front of you." The lady poked the cake from her plate and plopped it into her mouth.
"See, if you wanna live a life of convenience or fame, Coreiseuse or Excalibur might definitely be perfect for you." The redhead turned his head to look away once more. "But if you work the same way they do, would you really be able to call yourself a knight?"
Kirin nodded. "I see what you mean. Well, I'm really glad you told me about those guilds before I decided joining. Gave me second thoughts for sure. One thing though, you don't have to worry about me choosing convenience. Easy is the last thing I want for a job!"
"That's great to hear." A handsome smile went up on the redhead's face.
The lady wiped chocolate off her lips. "Now then. If you ever decide to visit our guild, tell the master you were able to survive Faolan's fire blast. He'll let you join for sure."
"Clear as air." Kirin bobbed his head. "Wait. Who's Faolan?"
"Oh." The questers flinched.
"We've actually forgotten to introduce ourselves this whole time." The lady stood. "My name's Alia Fhengyr, Harpe's top support specialist." She curtsied.
The redhead followed. "Faolan Dier. Dragonlaird." He bowed.
Kirin also stood and made a peace sign with his fingers. "Kirin Torisetti. Glad to meet you!"
***
"Thank you so much for the meal!" Kirin bowed at his two new acquaintances about to leave the saloon.
"No problem." Faolan raised a thumb. "This was the least we could do after what happened."
"Seriously, you can forget about that." Kirin looked kindly. "You've done enough to help me out."
"Still wish we could do more." Faolan stepped back and gave a salute. "Well then. Off we go. We still have to report to the guild."
Alia waved. "Looking forward to seeing you around, Kirin! Bye now."
"Bye, you guys! Thank you so much! Take care!" Kirin waved back until the pair were out of sight. "Now then."
Gotta speak to the landlord so he can get himself an apartment.
The saloon was a busy place, with dozens of tables and probably a hundred customers at least. It was quite loud and made it extra painful to find specific people.
Not the kind of painful Kirin liked either.
The trap walked towards the bar where a roughly bearded man in a suit reprimanded a lady in a maid costume. "Now get back there and make no more mistakes!"
"Yes, sir!" The maiden scrammed.
"Umm." Kirin hesitantly approached.
"Yes. Hello, my lady! How can we help you?" A bright smile erased the man's previous aggravation.
"I was looking for the landlord. Wanting to get a unit. I saw outside this place is also an apartment building."
"Aha! I see, I see." The man put his weight on a hand on the bar's countertop. "Proud to say, you're speaking to him right now."
"Oh. Great!"
"Do you have anything specific you're looking for in a unit?"
"I was wanting a bed, a bathroom, a kitchen, and some space to store gear." Kirin pointed at the sack and sword by his waist.
The man winked. "Very well. That I shall provide. Unit 40B. First door to the left on the fourth floor. Daily rent will be seven amalgium and fifty algium coins."
Sounds cheap. Kirin had 105 amalgium coins left. That'd be enough for him to stay two weeks if he's not to spend on anything else.
"This unit does have a bathroom and a kitchen?" Kirin squinted.
"And a great view of Bladewood City!"
"Gasp. Nice! Then this deal isn't bad at all. Can I choose another if I find a problem upstairs?"
"I doubt you would, but, sure." The man snapped his fingers, summoning a key from thin air. "Before I can give you this, there'll be an upfront fee of fifty amalgium for the first week. Afterwards, collection of fifty-two amalgium and fifty algium will be weekly."
"Clear as air!"
The two of them traded, fifty amalgium for the key. Then Kirin rushed upstairs to check out his new room.
A tiring climb it was, one which would soon be a daily task, though it wouldn't matter much. It was going to be worth it! For the room was quite pretty. With flower-shaped ceiling lights, white walls, and a fancy tiled floor. A canopy bed, a vanity mirror, a walk-in closet, a bathroom, and an area where he could cook and eat.
Kirin twirled as he pushed open a double-door to a balcony.
The proud sun breathed fire above, and so did the flying beasts ruling Bladewood's skies. Occasional towers were poking out of the thick forests. So were pillars of stones, adorned with vines. And dozens, if not hundreds, of massive monster dungeons loomed, dotted all over the city.
"From this day on! This place will be my new home."
A calm breeze passed.
Kirin dropped dead on his bed.
Knocked out.
Lifeless.
Despite him enjoying pain, damages to his body remain real. Thus, exhaustion took out his consciousness, leaving him asleep for a good eighteen hours straight.
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