"Idee - Ett got fired?"

"Yeah. I heard Paranoi - Dadmin fired him for his lack of intelligence."

"What do you mean?"

"He didn't even know what error failsafe Omega 3 A 6 F 9 4 5 0 8 6 R 1 2 4 U 9 7 2 3 J was!"

"Ha! Imagine not knowing what error failsafe Omega 3 A 6 F 9 4 5 0 8 6 R 1 2 4 U 9 7 2 3 J is! The imbecile!"

"I know, right?! That's crazy! Any mouse should know what error failsafe Omega 3 A 6 F 9 4 5 0 8 6 R 1 2 4 U 9 7 2 3 J is!"

"Just imagine not knowing what error failsafe Omega 3 A 6 F 9 4 5 0 8 6 R 1 2 4 U 9 7 2 3 J is! Was he disowned?"

"I think, yeah. Error failsafe Omega 3 A 6 F 9 4 5 0 8 6 R 1 2 4 U 9 7 2 3 J is something baby mice know how to initiate!"

"Ha! I know, right?!"

"...Say... What is error failsafe Omega 3 A 6 F 9 4 5 0 8 6 R 1 2 4 U 9 7 2 3 J?"

-Unknown source

* * *

David had a weird dream the other night.

It was about...

It was about...

Huh.

...Nothing, just a suspicious blank in his memories.

He knew he had had a dream, and yet he didn't remember anything from it.

Whatever.

David chose to ignore the suspicious blank in his memories and go get some coffee, because, well, who wouldn't?

* * *

"Success! Subject used human ignorance to ignore the suspicious blank in his memories!"

"...There was a suspicious blank in his memories?!"

"Yeah... You didn't know?"

"FIRE THE IDIOT WHO INITIATED THE FAILSAFE!"

"...You mean Idee - Ett?"

"Yeah, fire him!"

"Sir, I'm pretty sure he was under orders to fire himself...?"

"Oh..."

"Then hire him and then fire him again!"

"...And did I mention the fact that he was an unpaid intern?"

"...Oh."

"Then why was he so reluctant to leave?"

"He needs to do some hours of internship before graduating, sir."

"Say, how do you know so much?"

"I hold the record for the longest time employed by you, honorable sir! I have learned a lot!"

"How long have you been employed?"

"Four minutes, sir! Four whole min-"

"YOU'RE FIRED!"

* * *

Coffee.

Coffee.

More coffee.

Even more coffee.

David sighed as he gulped down another cup of coffee. He-

"Hey! David! Me from the past! Over here!"

David quickly spun around.

"What? Who are you? Where are you? What are you? Have you come to steal my coffee?!?!"

"I'm you from the future!"

"No you're not, this must be some kind of Ponzi scheme or something!"

"Listen, buddy, I'm actually you from the future, and I get that you're under a lot of stress right now, but I'm here to tell you that it's fine, this time loop is harmless, It-"

"If you're really me from the future, what am I going to do next?"

"Isn't it obvious? Drink another cup of coffee."

"...Too obvious! What else would I do?!"

"Drink another cup of coffee?"

"Good point."

"...I'll come back to you later, okay? After you're a bit more rational? Like, when you can think again?"

"...You aren't me from the future."

"Yes, I am!"

"If you were, you would stop trying to convince me that you were me from the future and accept the fact that I'm just going to keep thinking you're doing some kind of Ponzi scheme or something."

"Oh come on! That's not even what a Ponzi scheme is!"

"Ha! See? You know what a Ponzi scheme is! You must not be me!"

"NOOO O O__ O- o O__ Oo o OO__ o_ OO O._...o O 0~!"

David from the future vanished in a poof of logic.

"He isn't me!"

Stop breaking the fourth wall! Geez! Fake David from the future vanished in a poof of logic.

I don't get paid enough for this.

* * *

...And now, brought to you from REDACTED, we will now give an interesting, and quite legal, tour of the top-secret mouse labs to fill out the word count! Do note that it might be partially redacted.

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-REDACTED REDACTED

* * *

"...We need a better redactor."

"Oh, come on, it isn't that bad, is it? At least he's having fun!"

"Even the punctuation is redacted! We need our readers to know that we didn't just copy / paste a bunch of 'redacted's in there!"

"We have readers?"

"Yes!... I think?"

"Either way, we didn't have any text to redact in the first place! You already fired everyone; There's no one left to write it!"

"...Oh."

"YOU'RE FIRED!"