《Living Selfishly While Working Towards A Peaceful Life》Chapter 29
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Bai Li joked around with his family. The comradeship came easier than expected. Still, there was a place in his heart that twinged. Bai Wei should be here.
If this happened in their last life, how would things be different?
As soon as the thought crossed his mind, he discarded it.
He let the family time continue. Right now, was about Bai Fang. He would have to face a lot in this family. The least they could do was give him the best introduction.
As for Bai Wei, Bai Li didn’t know what to do. She had told a lie. That meant she was conscious, to an extent, about the effect her actions would have. He no longer had to wonder if it was unconscious on her part.
Would removing her from Ping An be enough?
He looked at Bai Tao and Ping Zen. He didn’t trust Ping Zen’s abilities. Wasn’t he responsible for raising Ping An? Bai Tao wasn’t any better. He abandoned his two children.
Maybe they should give Lee Shan a shot? The most that would happen was that Bai Wei would be raised to be useless? Is that any worse than being a murderer?
Bai Tao and Ping Zen talk. Bai Li played with Bai Fang. Or he tried to play but mostly watched. This child had too much energy.
Lunch was called, they sat at the table when Bai Wei walked in. A harried maid followed her in. Bai Li raised an eyebrow. It was clear that she was not supposed to be there.
This wouldn’t help the situation. Would any of these people dare to discipline Bai Wei? Bai Wei would be more willful and unruly than if she was being managed by Ping An.
“Bai Wei.” Bai Li’s voice was calm and even. “What are you doing?”
The princess persona she had been going with, disappeared. The little girl who ran to hide in his room was back.
“Big brother!” The tears threatened to spill from her eyes.
“Father, grandfather, and our younger brother are here. Greet them.” Bai Li didn’t know what he was trying to achieve.
Bai Wei’s eyes widened. “Younger brother? No! No! NOOOOO!!!” Bai Wei took up a fork and threw it. “Mommy said it. Mommy said it. Why don’t you listen to mommy.”
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The maid moved to get Bai Wei. Bai Li stopped her. He signaled for the people to start serving food.
Why were they so quick to comfort her? Would it kill her to cry? Bai Wei was old enough to know how to use her words. If they didn’t react, wouldn’t she get tired of crying?
As time went on and they continued to ignore this tantrum-throwing tactic, wouldn’t she stop using it?
Bai Li wasn’t an expert, but even negative attention was still attention. If attention was what she wanted, would she care if it was positive or negative?
Bai Li looked at Bai Fang when their eyes met. BAi Fang shook his head and made a gagging motion. Bai Li was worried that this would stress the boy out. He was glad to see that Bai Fang didn’t seem fazed.
Next, he looked at his grandfather and father. Ping Zen was giving him an assessing look, and Bai Tao looked uncomfortable.
Bai Li ignored these two and focused on his meal. The harder Bai Wei wailed, the less attention he gave her. They would need to talk to a specialist to develop a plan to deal with her behavior.
It was easy to feel sorry when you heard someone crying in distress. Especially so when it came to children. He could tell from the servant’s faces that they disapproved. In the same breath, he wondered how much patience they had with their own children.
He was sure that none of their children dared to behave this way, or they would face serious repercussions.
“Bai Wei. You are young, but you are not stupid.” Bai Li didn’t know how intelligent his sister was. In his last life, her ambition was to be a socialite. “Are you unaware of what is happening?”
Bai Wei stayed silent. Sullenly looking at the floor.
“Are you waiting for our mother?” Bai Li felt conflicted. It seemed bad to tell a child that her mother was an evil, conniving bitch, but it was also bad to leave her thinking that she was a good person.
No matter which path they took, Bai Wei would get hurt. There was no way to shelter her without running the risk of Ping An taking advantage.
They could block Ping An from seeing her daughter, but what happened if Bai Wei sought out her mother?
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Bai Wei was already resentful towards them.
“Didn’t grandpa tell you about mother?” Bai Li might have been spoiled. Bai Fang’s maturity was the exception, not the norm. Was it hard to change the way an eight-year-old child thought?
“You are lying!” she screamed.
“Bai Wei, is there any reason for me to waste my time lying to you?” Bai Li never raised his voice.
He didn’t intend for her to see reason. He wanted to introduce doubt into her mind. If Bai Wei was even a bit smart, she would grab hold of it to save herself.
“You're lying,” Bai Wei said softer this time.
“You already know.” Bai Li said. “You already know that the way we were living was wrong. The people here might not want to help you, but they have no intention of harming you.”
“Bother won’t you save me! Mother said no matter what, you would come to save me!” Bai Wei looked hopeful.
“Bai Wei. Save yourself. I can save you once, even twice. I might do it a hundred times. What happens during that one moment when I am not there?” Who will save me? Bai Li added silently. “Give and take. All you do is take Bai Wei. At some point, people will get fed up with giving.”
It was too harsh. These weren’t the words he should be saying to a child. They were the words he wanted to say to her adult self. He couldn’t control himself. Only Bai Wei had this effect on him.
“Coddling a crying girl separated from her mother?” His gaze moved to the woman standing behind Bai Wei. When he saw her flinch, he continued to speak. “If your child behaved like this, what would you do?”
The woman looked away. Being hit. Time out. No dinner. Having privileges removed. Children in lower-income families had chores and responsibilities. Where would they find time to throw a tantrum. It was called privileged for a reason.
Bai Wei would get away with how much ever she was allowed to.
“Don’t you love me anymore?” Bai Wei looked with big bright eyes and a pained smile.
She was too beautiful. There was a doll-like quality to her. “What does love look like to you?”
Bai Wei answered. She talked about everything with a serene smile. She talked about all the things he would do for her. The way he protected her.
“Then, do you love me?” Bai Li asked.
“Of course!” Bai Wei said in a watery voice.
There was no good answer to the question he was about to ask. “What does your love for me look like?” He did not think that emotions would have clear checks and balances, but for this, it worked perfectly.
Their relationship was one-sided.
“It is taking everything I have to protect myself. I have no way to protect you. Even if I did, if you continue to look for trouble, why would I?”
“Bai Wei, I will give you one piece of advice. I hope you remember it as you grow. Only you can determine what right and wrong look like for you. In deciding, your choice will have consequences. Since that is the case, don’t blindly believe other people’s words. Look and check for yourself. Even if they are people you care about.”
Trust?
Did trust mean you weren’t allowed to have doubts?
Was trust such a flimsy thing that it couldn’t stand up to scrutiny?
If you weren’t doing anything wrong, then there should be no reason to panic when someone wanted to investigate to be certain.
He wanted to have this conversation with his grandfather and then go home. The sleepless nights getting Bai Wei out of trouble. The fight and enemies.
He didn’t want Bai Fang and Bai Wei to meet, but these two useless adults took other things into consideration.
“Grandfather.” Bai Li’s voice was cold as ice. “I don’t appreciate being tested. I don’t like having my emotions toyed with.”
Train Bai Fang? Train Bai Wei? Forget that bullshit. If these two wanted people to continue their legacies, they could figure it out themselves.
The only reason he planned to do that was the need for his family’s support.
“I didn’t do it.” Ping Zen answered.
A thousand thoughts crossed his mind. He sighed. “Do I look like a rat trap?”
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