Consultation 31.

“God, how can I make husbando stealing normies explode?”

I scratched my head trying to think of a mechanism to accomplish such a feat in the literal sense, but I couldn’t think of anything particularly satisfying. In the end, I settled on a more practical method.

“Simply making them explode would result in their death. Don’t you think you’d be letting them off too easy by allowing them a quick death like that after the grace sins they’ve commited?”

“Oh. That’s true, isn’t it? Why would I ever want to let them off with an instantaneous death like that? Sorry, God, I was too narrowminded that I forgot that they deserved fates far worse than death. They need to suffer through hell and face the greatest humiliation. But In that case, what would you suggest, God?”

“Well, whenever you see a bitch stealing a husbando and they are on a date, what you can do is slip the most potent laxatives you can find on the market. I’d recommend one that uses magnesium sulfate as it tends to produce a large volume of liquid stool. You then need to lock the two of them together in a room without any means of escape. That husbando stealing bitch will eventually be unable to hold herself back and fill the room up with explosive diarhea in front of her partner. With liquid shit flying everywhere; the floor, walls, ceiling, his shoes, clothes, and that pretty face of his, the husbando will be traumatized and never want to see her again.”

“The bitch will face the greatest humiliation and will be scarred for life. She may even want to kill herself from the shame. Even if she doesn’t end up killing herself, you can keep tormenting her by following her around in secret and slipping those laxatives into her food and drinks so she’s forced to continually relive that nightmare over and over again.”

“God…”

“What is it?”

“Are you really God?”

“Yeah. Why are you asking that?”

“You seem more like a devil.”

“Hah? You’re comparing me to a mere devil? I’m a benevolent God who answers the problems that plague you mortals. You have the gall to insult me by tagging me as a devil after I’ve answered your question?”

“I’m sorry, it wasn’t an insult. I was just so impressed. I thought I’d need to seek out a devil for a solution, but to think that Gods were this far above devils. I’m honestly in awe of your methods.”

“Tch. The advice I gave you wasn’t anything that great. Now get lost.”

“Thank you, God. I will be sure to deliver God’s wrath upon those husbando stealing bitches. I’ll spread the word of God to all my suffering comrades as well. We will forever worship you as our saviour God.”

“Yeah, yeah. Enough of the ass kissing, more the of the get the fuck outing.”