《INTERGALACTIC BASTARD》Episode 29. A Boy and His Blob
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Being back in the big leagues was an indescribable rush. Although the fight on Luna was sanctioned by the Intergalactic Deathmatch, it was still a human-only affair; the crowd and combatants almost entirely composed of humans, with very few aliens mulling about. Being back on an alien moon, preparing backstage in his own room, had him pumped up. Sam stood and watched, engrossed in ensuring everything went off without a hitch.
“This feels right,” Coop commented.
“Does it?” she asked. “I’m glad. Getting us back here wasn’t easy, so it’s good you’re feeling ready.”
“Look, Sam, I know you were worried, and that I wasn’t... great, but—”
“Don’t worry about it,” Sam said. “Not now, at least.”
“So we’re good?” Although the answer was clear, Coop still felt uncomfortable knowing how inside his head he had gotten and the impact it had on her.
“Yeah, Coop. You just gotta get out there and win these fights.”
“Blobman is first.” He swung the bat twice, watching the indicator light above the arena door, still a strong red.
“Don’t worry, no Regis surprises tonight. Just get out there and get this done. The quicker you can smash this blob, the quicker you’re in the tank and ready for the next fight. Three fights is a lot.”
“Let’s hope there’s no need for the regen tank,” he said.
A buzzer sounded, light blinking over the door, letting Coop know the time had come. Bat in hand, he adjusted his jacket, exhaling. Before heading for the door, Coop turned to Sam, opening his arms while she came in for an embrace. It took her by surprise. Coop’s pre-fight rituals were guarded and intense, this being new. Whatever hyping up he’d done prior worked for who Coop was then, not Coop now.
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“Go get ‘em, champ.”
“You bet.”
Another buzzer sounded, the light turning green. Sam planted a kiss onto his cheek before he sauntered out into the arena, Coop shooting her a wry smile. Both stood for a moment, eyes locked with intense emotion.
“I love you, Sam,” he said.
“Love you, too. Go smash this blob.”
With a groan, the door opened, light pouring into the ready room alongside the roar of the crowd. The first time since the catastrophic Skidz battle, he’d been in front of an intergalactic crowd. A chant broke out through the crowd, sending a shiver down his spine.
“Coo-per, Coo-per!”
They hadn’t forgotten him. There was no faded star in Coop Sabre. An arena filled with aliens from across the galaxy chanting his name in Earth basic was all he needed to know. His strut across the sands was deliberate, bat held high in the air while they chanted and raved.
Across from him stood—or more likely undulated—the blob. The announcer worked through their names, although it was a blur thanks to the crowd noise. If Coop fucked this one up, it’d be over for him. There would never be another opportunity to come back like this. When the buzzer rang instead of rushing in, Coop stood in the moment. Instead, the blob rushed toward him, leaving a streak of purple behind them. The blob’s eyes bulged and remained in place while its body bubbled beneath it.
Two stubby arms protruded from its body, bursting out toward Coop, him batting it away with his elbow. His arm sank into the limb, cold and mushy. The other makeshift arm swung around, Coop ducking under it, bringing the bat up and connecting with a shot to the body.
His bat lodged itself in the alien’s body, a panic running through his system. If he couldn’t hit the damned thing, what could he do? Elbow freed, Coop backed up, flicking the charge pack on his bat into the “on” position. Just in time for another blow from the side, Coop slashed the bat upwards, intercepting the blow with a crash and a boom, the blob’s purple limb turning gray and hardening.
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This was it. The opening.
Just like that, the fight changed. The blob knew it, eyes widening and turning to rage, its color shifting from an amiable purple to a raging red. The grayed limb cracked him across the back of the neck, Coop stumbling into the red body, its once-cool flesh burning him, sending him leaping backwards regardless of the pain. Before the blob could recover, Cooper slashed at him again, the bat exploding on contact and graying whatever it came into contact with. There was no point to finesse, just to hack away at the alien indiscriminately, smashing and graying the blob’s body.
The grayed out limb took another shot, cracking and breaking away. In shock, the blob stared down at the severed, hardened glob, Coop returning with another hacking blow to the blob’s midsection, a gargantuan chunk crumbling away and leaving a massive hole in its side.
A protrusion burst from its body, a crushing blow to Coop’s chest, sending him onto his back. In its attempt to capitalize, the blob had to split, leaving behind a bulk of its body, grayed and crumbling behind it, now only a third of its original size and on top of Cooper. Its body burned an intense red, burning his flesh and singing his clothing. Two small protrusions extruded from the goo and smashed down onto his face, Cooper flicking at the switch on the bat, turning it up to full power. While on his back there was no chance of gathering up enough strength or momentum to land a solid blow, instead Coop drove the bat into its soft flesh, bringing his other hand around and feeling the cut of the barbs into his fingers while he gripped it tight around the blob, not letting it escape. The smell of burning flesh from both the blob’s red state on his body and the bat on the blob burned his nostrils, a high-pitched scream emerging from the blob before silence.
Coop pushed the hardened blob off of him, parts breaking away. His shirt was blackened, holes giving way to his burned flesh and his hand bleeding. An eruption came from the crowd while Coop staggered to his feet. He didn’t even hear the buzzer while the blob’s crew ran out to begin the rehydrating process.
“Your winner... Coop Sabre!”
Coop was back.
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