“I blame the nuns,” Akira muttered before falling asleep.

Ferros sighed and ran a hand through his hair. He had woken up just after sunrise and had been enjoying the view from his window when loud sobs had broken the quiet, stillness of the morning. At first, he thought his brother would go to Akira since he always did whenever anything happened with her. Even though they seemed to be drifting apart these days, he would always run to her. When the sobs had continued unabated, Ferros had gone to her room himself. What he found was not at all what he had been expecting.

Akira was sat in on of the chairs on her balcony. She was wrapped in the blankets from the bed but there was no way she was warm enough in that alone. Her fire had petered out to embers leaving the room even colder than it should have been, especially with the balcony doors wide open. Though Akira was sitting on the chair, it looked more like she was curled into it searching for warmth. Her body shook with the force of her sobs. His observations lasted less than a minute before he sprang into action. He made his way to her and put his hand on her shoulder. This caused her to flinch slightly.

“Sorry, I forgot how much that hurts you,” he said.

She didn’t answer, not that he expected her to with her sobs.

“Can you stand?”

She barely managed to give him a nod.

“Ok, I’m going to need you to uncurl yourself,” he told her.

He extended his hand as she slowly and stiffly unfolded herself from the chair. He grabbed her hand and pulled her the rest of the way to her feet before sweeping her into his arms. He made his way inside and kicked the door closed using his foot. After placing her on the bed, he turned to the fire.

“I’ll stoke the fire for you,” he told her going to the hearth.

Her sobs had finally subsided enough that he was sure she knew who had brought her in from the cold.

“W…w…where issss K…Kair…ros,” she stuttered through chattering teeth.

He was about to reply when the black wolf-dog made his way into the room and lept onto the bed. He watched as Akira curled into his side to share in his warmth.

“There, that should keep you warm,” he sighed as the fire flared back to life. “What in heaven’s name were you doing outside in such weather, Akira?!?”

“I needed to see the stars,” she mumbled into Kairos’ side so he couldn’t really understand her.

“What?”

“I needed to see the stars,” she repeated, this time without being muffled by Kairos’ flank.

“Are you mad?!?” he demanded.

“Probably,” she muttered drowsily.

“Probably?”

“I blame the nuns,” she mumbled before falling silent.

Ferros sighed and rubbed his forehead. He turned to leave but as he was reaching for the door, it swung open and crashed into his face with quite a bit of force. He muttered a string of curses before pushing the offender out of the room and shutting the door behind them.

“Ferros? What were you doing in Akira’s room?”

Of course, it just had to be his brother.

“Did you not hear the scream of anguish and the sobs?” he questioned as he tried to stem the flow of blood from his nose.

Ehren shook his head and Ferros sighed.

“Well I did and I found the poor girl freezing to death out on her balcony!” he snapped.

“She was crying an hour or so before dawn so I woke her up only for her to stumble to the desk and draw a man,” Ehren told him. “She then asked if there was a place she could see the stars so I sat her out on the balcony. I didn’t think she’d fall asleep before coming in. She said it was unlikely that she’d fall asleep so close to dawn anyway.”

“You are an idiot,” Ferros sighed in exasperation. “She has open wounds on her back, many of which are severely infected. She has a fever and is clearly not thinking straight! Why in God’s name would you leave her ALONE outside in this godforesaken weather?!?”

“I could tell she wanted to be alone with her thoughts,” Ehren said.

“That’s still no reason to leave a sick girl in -40 degree weather, not to mention a blizzard is blowing in!” Ferros was getting fed up with his brother at this point.

Suddenly, Ehren shoved past him and into Akira’s room. Ferros watched from the doorway as he made his way out onto the balcony. He picked up a piece of paper from the table to the left of the chair Ferros had found Akira in. Ehren stormed back to him and shoved the paper into his chest.

“Akira drew this after I woke her up,” he snapped. “She said her mother constantly drew this man and she always looked sad when she gazed at his picture. Her mother had some connection to this man. Did you ever notice how little Akira resembled her father?”

“I just thought she took more after her mother,” Ferros said taking the picture in his hands, well hand.

“No, the more I think about it the more it doesn’t make sense,” Ehren said. “Askel is almost an exact copy of Loxley but Akira shares no features with him. Not a single feature is from Loxley Eames. Do you remember what she looked like before she went to the nuns?”

Ferros gave his brother a confused look. Why was he bringing this up? What difference did it make what she looked like when they were children?

“Well, do you?” his brother prompted.

“I don’t know maybe,” Ferros groaned, his head was starting to hurt.

“Her hair wasn’t always white,” Ehren told him.

Ferros started at that statement. A hazy memory came to mind.

His mother and father welcomed the Lady Eames into the palace. A girl of about four stood tall on her right. A boy of maybe two clung to the girl and was partially hidden behind her. The girl had eyes that shifted from hoary to azure from one second to the next and very dark auburn hair. So dark it looked black until the light caught it just right and caused it to shine like burnished mahogany. The girl was introduced as Akira and the boy as Askel. The adults had shooed the children to the garden to play while they sat and took tea. Ferros watched, fascinated, as his brother challenged the girl to a pony race. The girl had laughed and declined until her brother had told her he wanted to watch her race. Akira had sighed in defeat and agreed to the race. They went to the barn and chose their ponies. Grooms had come to tack the pony for Akira but she waved them away saying she prefered to tack her own pony. The way she had prepared the pony was rather methodical for a girl of only four but Ferros shrugged it off. Once they both had mounted, one of the grooms started the race. Ferros watched in awe as Akira had coaxed breathtaking speed from her pony without the use of a crop. Ehren, being the sore loser, had disappeared for an hour or so to sulk. Ferros simply couldn’t wait to ask her how she had gotten the pony to go so fast without a crop so he ran to her after the race. His sudden appearance had startled Akira’s pony, causing it to rear. The adults saw and began to panic but Akira remained strangely calm. Without a word, Akira calmed the pony and walked it back to the barn. She reappeared moments later and when she did, Lady Eames raced to her and began to scold her harshly for her actions. Akira had said nothing until Lady Eames mentioned that she shouldn’t have been riding astride in the first place. Akira became enraged. She began yelling in what sounded like Danish. Her mother had promptly slapped her and made her apologies to his parents before taking both Akira and Askel home. It was the last time he would see Akira before her mother sent her to the nuns.

“Holy shit,” Ferros whispered. “Her hair was dark auburn. It looked black until the light hit it just right.”

His brother nodded.

“She yelled at her mother in Danish after I spooked her pony,” he continued oblivious to his brother’s prescence.

“Wait, she yelled at her mother?”

“Her pony reared because I spooked it and I guess it scared her mother enough that she went and began scolding her. Akira wasn’t even fazed when the pony reared. And she didn’t care about anything her mother said until she said something about her not supposed to be riding like a man anyway.”

Ferros could feel his brother’s gaze on him.

“What?” he demanded.

“How do you remember that? We were what, four?” he countered.

“It was the last time I remember seeing Akira before her mother sent her to the nuns,” Ferros sighed. “You saw her the day before she went I think it was two months later.”

“Where were you?” Ehren asked.

Ferros shook his head. Truth was he remembered where he’d been though he’d much rather not. He shivered at the memory trying to creep from the box he’d shoved it in all those years ago.

Ferros was shaken awake by his father hours before dawn made its way to the horizon. Every time he moved, pain shot through his body but he dare not make a sound for fear of his father’s wrath. His father pulled him through the darkened castle halls to the stables. He shoved a bag of clothes at Ferros ordering him to dress himself in them before they were seen. Ferros had merely nodded mutely and stumbled to a stall to change. What he pulled from the bag horrified him. Girl’s clothes and not just any girl’s clothes but prostitutes’ clothes. He couldn’t even question his father for fear he’d suffer another terrible beating like the one he’d received the night before. He dressed quickly and made his way back to his father.

“Don’t say a word,” his father growled.

Ferros nodded meekly and mounted the mule his father had had prepared for him. He sat sidesaddle instead of the way he normally would as his father led his mule into the city. The section of the city they were going to was notorious for numerous brothels, though at the time he didn’t know that. That was where his father left him, a brothel. And it wasn’t just any brothel, it was the most notorious brothel in the entire Empire. He would leave Ferros there every morning hours before dawn and retrieve him around midnight, if not later. The practice continued for a long time. He would get days off when he had to attend state functions or his father was feeling kind but those days were rather few and grew farther between after Terra’s accident. Up until recently, the practice was still ongoing. It almost seemed as if his father didn’t know he was doing it anymore it had become so routine. But one thing he had learned, was brothels were the best place to spy on enemies of the crown. He always wrote up a report after every trip to the brothel, not that his father ever read the reports.

“Let’s not discuss my whereabouts,” he muttered rubbing his nose gingerly.

“Why? It can’t be that bad,” his brother prodded.

“You have no idea the depths of our father’s depravity,” Ferros growled turning away from his brother.

“What are you talking about?” Ehren demanded following him.

“He’s talking about rape, princeling,” Asena said stepping into the light.

Ferros fliched at her declaration but did not refute it. Asena was correct, after all. He was talking about rape, though he wasn’t sure she knew just whose he was referring to.

“Your father wasn’t in his right mind,” Asena continued, leaning against the wall with her arms crossed across her chest. “He took your brother and dressed him as a prostitute before taking him to the most notorious brothel in the entire Empire. He didn’t give a reason for this action but your brother learned to be an adept spy in that brothel. My guess as to your father’s reason at the time was for your brother to learn how to pleasure a man, hence why he was taken to a brothel dressed as a girl.”

Ferros felt his brother’s gaze on him.

“Why didn’t you tell me?” he asked quietly.

“What would you have done? What COULD you have done?” he countered dejectedly. “You know father’s wrath at the time meant beatings that could cost us our lives. Do you think I would willingly let you suffer those just so someone else knew my shame?”

“Does mother know?” Ehren’s voice dropped lower, indicating his anger.

Ferros shook his head. Their mother was just as clueless to this event as Ehren had been. Ferros also knew that had their mother known about what their father was doing to him she would have miscarried Terra and possibly died.

“Mother still doesn’t know,” Ferros whispered. “I want it to stay that way please. This knowledge would kill her.”

He glanced over his shoulder to see his brother’s nod before turning to Asena.

“My lady, you had no right to reveal that information,” he hissed.

“Granted, but secrets are what is driving a wedge in this party,” she replied at length. “No more secrets. Secrets will only serve to tear us further apart. Princeling, you are in a perfect position to be a spy master now, with all the knowledge you have accumulated. Use that knowledge to your advantage or it will go to waste. Turn your father’s miscalculation into your strength. Do not let it continue to be your shame or he will continue to win. He cannot rule you forever; he will not live that long. Trust me, only Mavi and I know how to live longer than should be humanly possible and even we learned from someone else. She does not part with that secret easily.”

“You speak of this like it is an easy thing to do,” Ferros grumbled. “My father still drags me to the brothel when he can find me!”

“It sounds like his mind has been taken control of,” Mavi said from the stairs.

“Not you too!” Ferros was getting fed up.

“Son, I know it may be hard to believe, but I lived through something very similar,” Mavi told him quietly. “Pirates are far worse than fattened politicians.”

“You don’t know how disgusting thos fat, old politicians are!” Ferros exclaimed. “And every single one of them has a proclivity for young boys! The younger the better. And if the boy didn’t cooperate, it was likely he would end up beaten to death.”

“How old were you the first time?” Mavi asked.

“The first time what?” Ferros snapped. “The first time one of those dirty, fat pigs touched me or the first time one of them fucked me until I cried?”

Mavi raised his eyebrows.

“Because both happened the same night!” Ferros thundered. “I was only four!”

Silence fell on the hallway. Ferros was panting from his tirade and still trying to get his nose to stop bleeding.

“I didn’t even understand what was happening to me until I was eight,” Ferros choked back a sob. “It’s not like I could stop any of them anyway. They were always older than me.”

Suddenly, someone pulled him into a hug. Ferros turned, startled. His eyes met those of his brother and finally, he broke into the sobs that he had been holding back for years.