《Pink Mage》105, nothing to do with dalmonstersss!
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Micky and Kux had to hunt [Beast]s on the way back from where the poachers had captured the [Spirit beast] to feed it and it’s [Monster] ‘Friend’ that was still begging them for release from it’s ultimate doom. From what Micky could gather, they had not known about the spirit beast being out and about in the first place. It was just a simple high-quality spirit beast. And after Micky took a good long look at it he realized that it was, and that he had just gotten shafted for this commission. The beast was about shoulder height to him with a black coat and white spots. It had a brown underbelly and had tall pointed ears. The beast also had it’s ankle fur, tail fur, and a puff around it’s front chest that were shaped into puffballs from grooming. It was obvious from first glance that it was a well groomed, well breed pet.
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After another night in the forest traveling they arrived at the gates of the town. They couldn’t go in because they had an unregistered monster, an unregistered spirit beast, and an unregistered crimminal they needed to get through processing. Micky marked down on the map the approximate location of the poacher’s hut while he worked on processing the extra bounty for the criminal. The guards wouldn’t take his word for it that the man was a poacher just because, similarly they wouldn’t if he said he was a bandit. For all they knew he was a simple farmer from a rando village. Instead, they would go to the hut and check it out… eventually. It was pretty much guaranteed that he would already be processed and found guilty by then though, efficiency! Process guilt before even the evidence arrives!
By the time the prisoner was processed, an annoying hassle because he just happened to get one of those guards, the one that actually loves paperwork while complaining how much they hate it, and yet screaming about how they missed rule 32 or addendum 31 and 33 and so on. And of course, Micky had been shuffled off to him by the other guards because they didn’t want to do said paperwork, and wanted to get back to guarding… nothing.
The little girl, Micky forgot her name, arrived like a screaming terror. She dive hugged onto her ‘PUPPY!!’ grabbing it by the neck. The ‘puppy’ of course, excitedly yipped and ran around with it’s first baby girl on it’s neck. Then she noticed the one standing next to Micky. “And who is this?!” She screeched in joy.
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Micky answered with “This is Kux...” But he looked around in confusion as Kux had disappeared. Then he realized he had inadvertently named the monster, oh well. He continued on with “This is her mate.”
The little girl didn’t seem to latch onto what Micky just said because she continued on with “You’ve gotten so fat Puppy!” And while she continued to fat shame Puppy, who did not understand what it’s little girl was saying, could only look prouder at being visibly pregnant. All of which the young girls parents did catch though. And their faces went pale like a vampire had sucked them dry!
The father made an obvious fake cough and waved Micky over. “*Cough, cough* Kid, you don’t have to tell our daughter about all of that do you?” He said with a little bit of sterness.
Micky, caught on to everything instantly, he smiled at the two, they understood that he understood. “Oh, but she is my client, so I must! It is my responsibility to my client, to go into every detail she doesn’t understand.” He said with an oblivious, vindictive smile. They knew they shafted him, he knew they shafted him, and there was an oblivious little girl that was about to have her mind blown if they didn’t make amends for not paying the appropriate pricing. That spirit beast was worth a few thousand gold, probably more as it was a champion showbeast that Micky didn’t know about. The parents had wanted it gone, because it also cost hundreds a month just to feed the thing the high quality food their daughter demanded, not that it actually needed it, the thing ate it’s own turds!
The parents gave a rye smile to each other, they knew they’d been had. “Twen… twenty gold!” Said the father. But the mother quickly countered with “Fifty gold!”
Micky just played quiet. They were already offering in gold what had been a quest worth silvers. Micky was more shafted than he thought. “Sixty gold and not a copper more!”
Micky made a slow blink, you know the one, the one dripping in sarcasm. It’s so sarcastic it practically has it’s own subtitle over it saying ‘Really? Really now?’. “One hundred gold!” Said the mother practically begging. The father was about to scream higher as he got competitive… until his wife elbowed him in the stomach and he went down.
“Ahh, you know, that monster also needs to be tamed. They are a package deal now, I doubt Puppy would want to leave it’s ‘it’ behind.” Said Micky with a slow drawl.
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“Fine, fine, we will give you a commission for taming the monster, but we will have it tamed later by a reputable [Tamer] we know! And...” said the mother as she bit her lip. “... And we will give you priority status on all of our quests from now on!” She finished.
Micky pulled out an empty scroll and some travel ink he had. “I’ll need that in writing. The guild won’t accept it, but the town sure will.” The mother picked up the quil and signed the document that Micky had drafted. It had everything that they had just said on it, and that was the problem. She had wanted to draft the document herself so that she could add certain stipulations, but Micky had beaten her to it. She then kicked her husband in the stomach again to get him up. He just cringed on the floor for a bit, but he didn’t finally get up after she threatened to kick him again.
Micky fled them with his document like the cat that ate the canary. Because, metaphorically he just did. Now he just needed to go to the guild and take out ten gold to create a ‘guild’ with them. He could make a company, but that wouldn’t allow as many protections and benefits, and his party wasn’t going to cut it. No, Micky was going to take out a guild, a too large expense for most adventurers, but he just made 100 gold and whatever they asked for a taming commission, what did he care?
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Micky arrived at the local bar he liked to frequent. He waved at his friends who waved back until an adventurer walked up to him and said “A little bird told us you just got your first [Error] kid! She was a bit of a flip floppy drunk going from angry and sad drunk to happy and bubbly drunk but she was sure to tell us about it. She was a cute one that bird!”
Micky absolutely blushed. “I uh, I did do that out on my last mission didn’t I?” Micky replied.
“Here here! Have a toast with me to celebrate! Come on! Don’t be shy!” Said the adventurer. He then passed Micky a cup of ale and took one of his own before downing it.
Then another adventurer said “Hay, have a toast with me too! To finally becoming a man!” He bought Micky another ale and one for himself, before downing it as well.
When Prin and the rest of his friends arrived they saw what was happening and got in on the fun. There was no way Prin was not going to enjoy this. By the time Micky had toasted with Prin to becoming a man for the third time, he no longer remembered what happened that night. Of course, he hadn’t for a long time, or he would have realized what Prin was trying to do…
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Micky woke with something fluffy in his arms. He cuddled the fluffy closer until he heard a yip from it. Micky quickly woke up, and then realized he had a major hang over the likes of which he hadn’t had since that one harvest festival he promised never to repeat the mistake…
When he opened his eyes he was hugging a doglike kobold (not the ones related to dragons! Those are two different species with the same name!) It looked like an Akita Inu and was about half to two thirds Micky’s height. It was also clearly male going by what morning brought…
Micky all but flew up into the air when he realized what, or who he was hugging. It said, “Look, people like to cuddle, everybody likes to cuddle, and I’m a guy that gets a hell of a lot more cuddles then most, but if you’re going to cuddle a guy, the least you could do is give him a helping finger next time!”
Micky quickly nodded and hurried downstairs. He was still in the same bar as before, but was in the inn part in the back that doubled as a drunk tank. He paid to leave and met up with Prin who was smiling down at him. She asked “How was it?” With a knowing grin.
Micky replied with “It was an amazing level of fluff, I have to say… Though I’d have to find a girl next time I’m blackout wasted...”
Prin said “Really? Guess I’ll have to give it a try...”
“I don’t think you could...” Replied Micky honestly.
“Anything you can do, a girl can do better.” She replied with a confident predatory smile.
“He’s an inny not an outie.” said Micky.
“Oh, Oooh, OOOOH! Oooh, oh...” She said as the realization dawned on her. Then she said “Ooooh, oooh, ooh, ooooooooh, oh, ooh, oh, ooooh, oh, ooooooooh...” And Micky smacked her on the arm to stop bugging him and they laughed.
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