Serah's POV:

My eyes lazily darted over the group of people around me. I analyzed their emotions. Most of them were happy, but in both Perryn and Robin, I saw something bothered them.

Perryn. I don’t know what made me think his name, but I was reminded of only a few nights before, when I had kissed him. I had mentally banged my head against the mirror a million times after that night in my quarters. Why had I kissed him?

‘I had probably been drunk.’ I thought. And this was most likely true, at least a little. I didn’t want to give him false hope where there didn’t need to be any, but something still tugged at the edge of my mind. What if I hadn’t been drunk? What if I just really wanted to kiss him? But I pushed these thoughts to the back of my mind, along with other thoughts that haunted me. I had only known him for a few days. He was cute…No…He was really, really handsome, but that wasn’t what bothered me the most. He was a royal, a prince at that, and I couldn’t bear princes. Not after the last one…

“But he’s different.” My conscience told me.

“He’s still a prince.” I replied.

“A handsome prince, who literally stares at you as you walk past, who held you so gently, who’s kind…cares for his kingdom, and not for getting a wife…”

My conscience was right.

“Shut up,” I replied, “I don’t need you.”

“Apparently you don’t need anyone and that’s why you’re not married yet.”

“Go away!” I mentally roared.

My conscience didn’t reply.

“And I’m only eighteen so I can wait a while.” I growled to my conscience.

* *

When everyone eventually left to their rooms, I went to the front balcony instead. It was above the staircase to go up to the rooms and overlooked the town and port. I hummed as I stood in the darkness, the only light being the moon. The town was quite beautiful at night. I missed watching it. Usually, I was down in the town at night, in my own small house, but Henry requested that I stay just this one trip with the royals. I didn’t really mind. I didn’t like too many people, but I didn’t like to be alone either. Being alone brought nightmares from the past, and I preferred to avoid my nightmares. When I had nightmares, I often woke up screaming and covered in sweat, my dog sitting at the edge of the bed and watching me curiously. Once I had done this when Elizabeth had stayed with me. It scared the living daylights out of her, and whenever I had two or less people living with me, I always made sure to stay up at night. Elizabeth often told me that I didn’t sleep enough, nor did I apparently eat enough. I preferred not to tell her why I avoided sleep when I could. I heard from some old hags in a bar once that not having sleep was apparently bad for you, but I ignored them. Soon after giving this comment, the women grew drunk and fell asleep in the bar.

My thoughts were interrupted by a slight rustle behind me. My relaxed shoulders instantly tensed but then I recognized the footsteps as they approached me; Perryn.

My heart skipped a few beats.

“You get excited when he comes around.” My conscience commented, having returned suddenly.

“No I don’t.”

“Yes you do. When he looks at you, you flush inwardly and you avoid his gaze lest you may show some facial expression and ruin your frosty facade.”

My conscience had better vocabulary than me.

I mentally rolled my eyes as he approached and stood beside me, watching me momentarily.

“Hey.” He said finally, turning to watch the view.

“Don’t choke it out. Stand strong. Don’t let your voice crack. Look pretty. Sound careless.” My conscience reminded me.

“Hi.” I said smoothly.

“Good.”

“Shut up.”

Perryn’s POV:

Her eyes were very blue in the light. They reminded me of the ocean. Her gaze was transfixed on the view, and she refused to look at me so that I could see her eyes clearer. Every once in a while, her lips twitched, as if she was having a mental conversation with herself, but that was all that moved on her face. I wondered what she was thinking about.

Serah’s POV:

“Cheese.” My conscience mumbled dreamily.

I sighed and Perryn instantly looked at me. I realized I had done it out loud.

“What?” He asked, looking worried, “I can leave…” He sounded panicked.

“Stop.” I ordered, stifling my laughter. He was always so worried that I hated him, it was kind of cute.

He seemed to settle down slightly, “What are you doing here?” He asked.

“Waiting.” I replied.

“For who?”

“Not who; what.”

“Okay, what?”

“Time.”

I could see he was getting confused.

“What do you-“ He started, but was interrupted by the midnight bell. It slowly rung and when it passed, he looked at me, “That time?” He asked.

I nodded, “Nineteen stupid years of existence.” I remarked, “I feel so old, but in reality I’m still a kid.”

He blinked at me, “It’s…your birthday?”

I didn’t answer him, instead we both turned to the door behind us as a thunderous sound came throughout the house. As it became louder, I realized it was footsteps. The balcony doors flew open, and Henry, Tanner, Colten, Elizabeth and Lydia scrambled in, followed by a few sleepy royals.

Henry grabbed me and slung me over his shoulder effortlessly, laughing as he turned and stomped back into the house. I sent Perryn a helpless look as my friends started chanting “Happy birthday!”