I

MEET THE MISFITS

It was a hot day in sunny California. Most people did their best to stay inside during mid-afternoon when the sun was at its highest and the heat was at its worst. One such person was Daniel Petersen, though the heat wasn’t the only reason he stayed indoors. He was a loner and usually spent his time isolated in his basement, tinkering or working with his hands. This day was a different story. Instead of spending time in his basement, he spent the day doing what he loved most…playing video games.

He sat in his underwear, relaxed in an old recliner his grandfather had given him. Beads of sweat fell down his forehead. His sandy blond hair, dripping in sweat, clung to his face. A fan sputtered next to him and blew hot air on his baked skin. He hesitated to turn on the A/C as he was trying to cut back on utilities. Running the air conditioner caused his electric bill to skyrocket. He wiped sweat from his brow. The heat was unbearable. He slowly got up and flipped on the A/C. On his way back to his chair, he pulled the curtains to block out the burning sun. The room grew dark, save for the blue hue of his television casting a soft radiance throughout the living room. He plopped back down in his recliner and reached for a controller sitting on the end table next to him.

On the television across the room was the opening menu screen for Misfit Nation, a third person action-adventure game with role playing elements, known for its extreme violence and sexual nature. The game was set in a dystopian future, in a city called Overworld, where crime ran rampant, and justice was rarely sought. It followed a group of seven vigilantes who took it upon themselves to clean up the streets as law enforcement was deemed unfit to do it. They were called “The Misfits” for each one of them possessed special talents that set them apart from others. When Sheera, a demon priestess from the Underworld, and her army of fiends arise to feed off the degradation occurring on the surface, The Misfits are the only thing preventing hell on Earth.

Daniel reclined back and resumed the game. He was in the middle of a battle against a horde of devilish fiends. His fingers moved effortlessly across the buttons on his controller. He had played the game so much he could play it with his eyes closed. As he switched between characters to use their special abilities in the battle, he noticed his game start to lag. The images on the screen stalled and then skipped forward. Daniel drew in a sharp breath. He hoped the game wouldn’t crash. When the lagging stopped, he sighed in relief. He finished the battle with a powerful attack and then kicked back to watch an in-game cinematic or, what those in the video game world call, a cutscene.

The Misfits stood in the aftermath of battle with dead fiends laying all around them. The burning city behind them cast an orange glow of foreboding. A menacing female figure floated above them in the sky. She had red skin and horns protruding from her head like a devil. A tattered, black cloak covered her like a wispy shroud. She struck a sharp toothed smile and peered down at the heroes.

“Not bad for a bunch of misfits,” said the figure in a deep sensual voice.

“Who the fuck are you?” asked Rico, the group’s leader. He was a man of brutish stature known for his menacing stare which was heightened by a deep scar over his left eye. He aimed his machine gun and gestured to his comrades to ready their weapons.

“I am Sheera, mistress of the Underworld and your new ruler,” she said, raising her hands up. “Kneel before your new queen.”

An Asian cowboy, named Jett, swaggered to the front of the group. He twirled two six-shooter pistols in his hands like an old west gunslinger. “I reckon you don’t know who you’re talking to. This city ain’t big enough for the eight of us.”

“Go back to the hell you came from, you bitch,” said the group’s rogue archer, Ava. She was a woman of Indian descent with long black hair and athletic build.

“Yeah,” squeaked the team’s berserker. He was a pale and lanky teenager named Scotty. Though he was small and cowardly, he could unleash a harnessed fit of rage if pushed hard enough. He hid behind Ava and feigned bravery. His bright blue eyes, marked with black eyeliner, peeked through bangs of bleach blond hair hanging in his face. “W-w-we don’t want you here,” he stuttered. Ava lifted her bow and prepared to strike. She aimed at Sheera’s head and shot an arrow with fierce accuracy. Sheera dodged the arrow with ease. Ava’s jaw dropped in surprise. She’d never missed a shot before.

The rest of The Misfits struck a battle stance behind her. Their mechanic, Kitsie, a freckle-faced blonde, heaved a giant hammer in her hands and thrust it toward the ground with a sonic boom. She stared at Sheera through a pair of thick glasses. Her attack did nothing.

Deandre, a dark-skinned man with a tall, lean frame leapt from the smoky shadows and flitted several throwing knives at Sheera. He flipped in the air like an acrobat before landing on his feet in time to see Sheera block the knives with the wave of her hand. The knives hurled towards a beautiful brunette named Lauren. She quickly removed two katanas from the scabbards on her back to block the knives. Her carnal, hazel eyes reflected in the blades of her swords as she prepared to launch an attack.

Sheera waved her long index finger back and forth at Lauren like a mother scolding her child. “Tsk, tsk, tsk,” she said with the click of her tongue. “I wouldn’t do that if I were you.”

She smiled as more fiends rose from the depths to assist her. They slowly encircled the heroes. Sheera snapped her fingers, and everything froze in place. The entire city was still. The fires from the battle stopped flickering. The fiends stood, not moving, as if someone had hit pause on a movie. Sheera was still stuck in the air, trapped in the action of snapping her fingers. She was motionless. Only The Misfits were able to move about.

“Uhm,” Lauren looked around at the frozen scene. “What the hell just happened?”

“Fucking piece of shit!” said an angry voice from nowhere.

A bright light shown behind the heroes. They turned around to see a small window appear in front of them. Through the window was a man in his underwear, sitting in a recliner, staring angrily at them. He shook an object in his hands and cursed under his breath. He got up from his chair and stomped toward them.

“Hey,” said Rico. “Who are you?”

The man froze in his tracks. His stare went from anger to confusion as he cocked his head slightly to the side. He continued to peer through the window at them.

“I said, ‘who are you?’” asked Rico. “You. The guy in the boxer shorts, who the hell are you?”

The man gasped and stumbled backward. He gripped his shaggy blond hair in his hands. “I must be hallucinating,” he said to himself.

Rico raised his machine gun to the window. “This is the last time I’m asking. Tell me who you are or I’m blowing your damn head off.” The man didn’t answer, and Rico opened fire.

“What the fuck?!” screamed the man as he ducked below the stream of bullets. When the firing stopped, the man stood up and looked at the bullet holes peppering his wall. He turned back to the window. “No. There’s no way this is happening,” he said to himself. He rushed forward and pulled a cord out of a wall near him. He looked at the cord and then back at the window. The blood rushed from his face making him white as a sheet.

Rico raised his weapon to fire again. Lauren stepped forward and forced him to lower it. “Rico, I don’t think he’s a threat to us,” she said, pointing to the man. “Look at him, he looks like he’s seen a ghost.”

“Yeah, man,” said Deandre. “He’s paler than Scotty.”

“Shut up, Deandre,” scoffed Scotty. “I’m not THAT pale.”

“Dude, yes you are. You’re like a gothic wonder.”

“I take that as a compliment.”

Lauren stared at the unknown man. She took note of his features. He looked human, yet something was off. “He looks so weird,” she said after a moment. “He IS a person, right?”

“Who cares? He’s hot,” said Ava with a smile. She raised an eyebrow at the sight of the unknown man’s half naked body. The man stared back at her with wide eyes.

Kitsie pushed her friends aside and pressed her face up to the window. “Maybe we’re looking at some sort of portal to an alternate dimension,” she said happily. “Oh, this is so exciting!”

Lauren curiously reached her hand out. “Where did this thing come from?” she asked. As she reached out, her hand seemed to pass through to the other side of the portal. Her hand changed to match the look of the unknown man. She quickly pulled her hand back.

“I reckon Kitsie was right about that alternate dimension stuff,” said Jett.

Rico pushed past his comrades and inspected the portal. He slowly reached out his hand to the other side. He furrowed his brow in curiosity and slowly pushed more of his arm through.

“Hey, Rico,” said Jett. “You sure about this, partner?”

“No,” replied Rico. “But look around, what do we have to lose?”

He proceeded to push the rest of his body through the portal until he rested on the other side.

“What the hell?!” screamed Daniel as Rico’s body pushed through his television. He scrambled away and tripped over his coffee table. He quickly stood up to see Rico’s full form standing in his living room. He no longer had his weapon, but his menacing presence was enough to strike fear into anyone. Daniel didn’t know what to do. He wanted to scream, but when he opened his mouth, nothing came out. He just stood there with his mouth hanging open.

Rico looked at his hands and felt his face. His fingers scraped along the dark stubble on his cheeks. A strand of black hair hung in his eyes and tickled his brow. Rico swatted it away. He looked down and pulled at his clothes. He was wearing a skintight jumpsuit that clung to the bulge of his privates. He pulled on the suit to loosen it but was unsuccessful. “What happened to my clothes?” he asked. He looked around for his gun. “And where is my gun?”

Ava, Scotty, Jett, and Deandre pushed their way through to Daniel’s living room. The last to enter was Lauren. She stood up and reached for the katanas on her back to find they were missing. Not even the scabbards were there. “Where are our weapons?” she asked. Her long brown hair flipped back and forth as she searched over the group. She grabbed a hold of her hair. “My hair. What the hell is wrong with my hair?” she asked. It had never moved in such a way. It flowed with ease when it used to be stiff and move like a hunk of plastic on her head.

“I think it’s beautiful,” said Kitsie. She was talking about her own hair. She rubbed a few blonde strands along her freckled cheeks. “It’s so nice.”

“I’m with Lauren,” said Ava. She spit a strand of hair caught in her mouth. “I don’t like it.”

“Where are we?” asked Scotty. He looked inside of a fish tank and watched a little black fish swim around. “Everything looks so strange.”

Rico panned over his group and turned to see Daniel still standing with his mouth agape. He ran over and grabbed Daniel by his neck. “You better start answering some questions and fast!”

Daniel didn’t know what to say and he couldn’t have said anything even if he wanted to. He was on the verge of passing out from the death grip around his neck. He did his best to break free of Rico’s grasp but failed.

“Where are we?” asked Rico. He increased his grip, tightening his fingers around Daniel’s throat. “Answer me!”

Daniel struggled to speak. “You…you crawled out of my television,” he said in a raspy tone.

Rico looked behind him at the television. He turned back to Daniel. “Yeah? And how is that possible?”

Daniel struggled to fight the grip on his neck, his body growing limp from the lack of oxygen. Lauren rushed over and placed her hand on Rico’s shoulder. “Rico, stop,” she said forcefully. “Let him go.”

Rico clenched his jaw and thrust Daniel back into the recliner. Daniel gasped for air and looked at Lauren, his piercing blue eyes still bloodshot from being nearly strangled. “Thank you,” he coughed.

“Don’t thank her yet,” said Rico. “Tell us what happened or next time I’ll break your neck.”

Daniel swallowed hard. “I don’t know what happened. I was playing a game and encountered a glitch. I couldn’t shut the game off and somehow you crawled out of my television.”

“Why don’t we have our weapons?” asked Lauren. “We had them before coming here. Where did they go?”

Daniel shrugged his shoulders. “I don’t know.”

Lauren looked around the living room and noticed a plastic case for Misfit Nation. It had her face on the front. Her comrades were also pictured. She picked the case up and furrowed her brow. “Rico? I think you need to look at this.”

Rico ripped the case from Lauren’s hands. He examined the front and turned it over. The group huddled behind him.

Scotty read a blurb on the back of the case. “Join Rico, Lauren, and the rest of the Misfits as they fight for Earth’s salvation against Sheera, a Priestess from the Underworld. Hell bent on Earth’s destruction; she will stop at nothing until the planet is hers…even if that means killing anything that gets in her way. Rated M for Intense Violence, Nudity, and Strong Sexual Themes.”

“What is this?” asked Rico, holding the game case up.

Daniel hesitated to answer. “That’s…a video game,” he said. “I was playing that when you climbed out of the television.”

“What’s a video game?” asked Scotty.

“It’s…It’s like a visual story…only you control the characters.”

“Nobody controls me,” said Rico. He pointed an accusing finger at Daniel. “You’re lying.”

Daniel frantically shook his head. “I swear I’m not lying. I wish I were.”

The Misfits were silent. They exchanged looks of concern until Deandre threw his hands up in frustration.

“I don’t think I can take anymore weird stuff happening to me. First, Earth is invaded by demons, then we enter an alternate dimension, and now some white dude is telling me I’m not real,” said Deandre counting each occurrence on his fingers. “Well, I don’t know about you, but this is too heavy for me. I’m outta here. I’ll take my chances against Sheera.”

“I agree,” said Ava as she backed toward the TV. “This is some bullshit.”

Deandre turned and pushed his head toward the television. His head hit the screen causing a loud ‘CLUNK’. “What hell? Why can’t I go through?” he asked, rubbing his forehead. He placed his other hand on the screen.

“I guess it’s a one-way trip,” said Kitsie.

“What do we do now?” Scotty’s teenage voice cracked as he spoke. “We’re stuck here!”

“Shut up and let me think!” yelled Rico. He paced the floor and ran his fingers through his thick hair. He stopped and pointed to Daniel. “You. What’s your name?”

“D-Daniel. My name is Daniel.”

“Did you have anything to do with this, Daniel?” Rico stared Daniel down. “Are you responsible for us being here?”

Daniel shook his head. “I have no clue how this happened. I swear.”

Rico paused for a moment and looked around the living room. It was quiet except for the rippling of water from Daniel’s fish tank. He raised a curious brow and turned to his group. “It looks like we’re staying.”

“Um, what?!” exlaimed Deandre.

“Did you suddenly grow deaf? I said, ‘we’re staying’.”

“But why?” asked Scotty.

“Well, we can’t get back the way we came in.” Rico gestured the television then to his surroundings. “And look around you. Everything here is fine. I say we see what this place has to offer us.”

Lauren stepped toward him. “Rico, we can’t stay here. We need to get back home,” she said softly. “People are counting on us to stop Sheera.”

Rico walked to the television and pointed to Sheera, her animated body still paused on the screen. “Look at her. She’s stuck there. If she stays like that, she's not hurting anybody, there or here. I’d say our job is done.”

“Well, I’d certainly rather stay here than go back to that bitch in there,” said Jett. He walked to Rico and gave him a brotherly handshake. “Rico says we should stay, and frankly, that just about dills my pickle.”

“Lauren’s right,” chimed Daniel. “You can’t stay here.”

“The hell you just say to me?” asked Rico.

“I said ‘you can’t stay here’. You don’t know how this world works.”

“Then why don’t you show us how it works then?” Rico walked over to Daniel. He smiled and placed his arm around Daniel’s shoulders. “Put on some pants. You’re taking us out tonight.”