《Kobold Expansion》Recorded in a pyramid
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I lay the long twisted stands of tree bark fibers out to dry and go scrounging through the river bed for flint. Flint is found by water. If I can find flint then I can upgrade my weapons from bug parts into things that look like actual weapons. I thank my past self for playing so many survival video games and watching so many random youtubes videos at 3am. Without them I don’t think I would be able to survive this world. There is also the precursory knowledge I obtained from watching that dude who built crazy shit with primitive tools. After the fibers dry I can string my bow. Wood arrows are fine, but flint arrows will be much better. Plus a flint knapped knife would be great. I could even make a spear! The main arm of the medieval world. With a spear I’d be unstoppable! Oh! Is this it? I pick up a grey rock and slap it against another rock. It chips off, leaving a sharp edge. It is!
I don’t have a backpack, Carrying three weapons and arrows was tedious. I braided more plant fibers and made a quiver. I had a brilliant idea to use my knife as the head of the spear. I just tie it on with plant sinew. Doesn’t that make the spear head prone to falling off? I ignore Eris. I carry the bow on my back, the string holding it around me. You’re supposed to unstring a bow when it’s not in use. I continue to ignore Eris. With all this gear, I am ready to hunt. I use my sharp talons to climb up a tree. That simple act nets me a new skill [Climbing(Minor)]. This is atop of my crafting level having gone up as I created my weapons. I feel like I could make better weapons now, but that’d waste time. Sometimes I feel like the skills are just numerical values to my progression. When I evolved I got new skills instantly, but besides that is it not just keeping track of my natural progress? What I’m trying to say is that, for example, wouldn’t my digging skill naturally get better the more I dig? I don’t need a skill to tell me that, but maybe it’s an overall buff that is leveled up by repetitive actions. If that’s the case then couldn’t I in theory practice one punch and be able to take down a bear. On earth that was stupid shit your karate instructer told kids to get them hiped about watching his overwight ass dance around in culturally appropriated pajamas. The system is confusing and needs more testing.
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My first prey was a rabbit with a horn on its head. I pull out an arrow and notch it. I just have to point and shoot. Deep breath, pull the string, and shoot! Letting the arrow fly it goes wildly off coarse. The rabbit is alerted to my presence and runs away.
New skill! Marksmanship(Minor)
Oh yeah, I’ve never shot a bow before. Well, why not test the system? I hop down from the tree. If the system is leveled up through repetitive action. AKA ‘training’ then perhaps if I train enough I’ll get better. What are you saying? Of course you’ll get better if you train. Yeah, I know, what I mean is that perhaps I’ll show growth much faster than if I was naturally training. I create a ball of dirt and set it up on a nearby rock. I fire arrow after arrow into it. Most of them miss, but a few hit. I retrieve the arrows from the ground and return to my spot about ten feet away from the dirt ball. After I begin to hit around half the shots I step back farther and shoot again. I repeat that process until the sun sets. By the time I’m done training my marksmanship skill is at (medium). Now I test the system. I’ve been shooting straight shots with my right hand all day. I switch what hand holds the bow. On earth this would be a whole ordeal of training my body again. It’d be starting at square zero almost. I pull back the string, take a deep breath, aim the shot, wait till I exhale, then at the deepest part of my exhale I let the arrow flow. It skewers the ball of dirt. So that’s how the system works. It’s not just a ranking, it’s a boost. With one afternoon of hard training I can be proficient in almost anything. Fuck being a jack of all trades, I can be god of all trades! Caught up in this realization I look at what skill to train next. Pyromancy sounds easy. I just need to burn shit! I find a patch of dry brush. “Creates Fire!” A small fire dances on the dead leaves. It then quickly spreads. My smile fades as the fire grows at an exponential rate. “Create water!” I try to create water on top of the fire, but it is already so large that nothing I can do will help. I retreat to the river bed and the forest begins to burn. I cross over to the other side of the river. With my immediate safety taken care of I am left looking across the river as the forest burns. What would smokey bear say? I know, I’m a terrible person. I created a forest fire. God damnit! Fucking hell. How could I be so dumb? Of course it was going to get out of control. It's a forest. I sigh and climb up into a nearby tree. I don’t want to be attacked while I berate myself to tears.
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Level up! 2/10
Oh god! It’s killing things. I pull on the spiky bits on the back of my head. I’m a monster. You’re a kobold. “Shut up Eris! I don’t need your sass right now!” I screamed at the voice in my head. I haven't yelled at her out loud since I was a kid. Another way I’m slipping.
Level up! 3/10 Level up! 4/10
Each level up message makes my heart hurt. I’m killing cute forest animals without mercy or the vague human notion of killing for a purpose that we use to rationalise hurting animals.
Level up! 5/10 New titles: Master Pyromancer. Pyromaniac Three new spells added to your spell book.
“I’m not a pyromaniac! It was an accident!” Now you’re screaming at the user interface. Like a child yelling at his video games. This isn’t a game. It’s real life, I’m a real life forest burner.
Level up! 6/10
I wiped my tears, my brain went into shut down mode. What it needed was time and distance from this event. I feel asleep in the tree branch.
Level up! 9/10
I did the math in my head. 1+2+3+4+5+6+7+8+9=45 At most this fire has caused death for 45 lifes. Forty five lifes that I will have to atone for somehow.. Or you could just not. Then I’d be a terrible person. So what, you burnt a few monsters alive. Probably was that goblin village that was terrorizing the nearby humans. In other circumstances you’d be a hero. Their deaths served your growth. The weak can do nothing to the strong but complain. “But I want to be a good person.” why? I have no rebuttal for Eris but the obvious. I want to be good because I was told to by the society I grew up in. Plus I’m the protagonist of this story. I have to be a good person. No one wants to read about a dude who murders millions. Mein kampf is a best seller. I give a grave laugh to Eris’s joke. Her trying to persuade me to be a psychopath won’t work, but she did say that only goblins died. She has a knack for knowing more than me. I’m uneasy about killing things that speak, but goblins are inherently evil creatures, right? Even if I used overkill then the ends justify the means, right?
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