“We are always in the shit, only the depth varies,” I quoted as I stared down at the mess I had just made.

Crouching down, I began to pick up the pamphlets and place them back in the box. My favourite historical phrase has no author or a time period attributed to it, so it made sense that a nobody would quote yet another nobody. Once most were in the box, I lifted it onto the shelf and squatted once more to pick up the remaining few for the front desk.

The door swung inward and like clockwork, the source of all my strife at work came in with a smug look on his face.

“I’m gonna need you to mind the desk for me while I go off to lunch,” said Colin as he folded his arms and leaned on the door frame.

I stared at him for a while before replying.

“You aren’t being serious right now, are you?” I asked, deadpanned.

I already knew the answer but what could it hurt trying.

"Oh I am,” he replied smugly, in only a dickish way that he was capable of. “It’s about to get so serious that it might come up in your monthly review that you left the desk vacant.”

“That doesn’t make any-“ I began to speak but he cut me off.

“I put your name down for the desk before I came to fetch you,” he said as he snapped his fingers. “You better get a move on before this comes up on your monthly review.”

I wanted to punch him in the stupid face so bad. It would never actually happen, not because Colin was imposing or anything but I just never had the stomach to pick a fight with people. He put on a mock look of surprise as well as placed a hand on his chest.

“Hey man, I’m just trying to help you out,” he tried to sell to me. “I could have just left the desk and not told you about it.”

He finished his statement with a shrug and I fought to roll my eyes.

“What you don’t believe that I’m looking out for you? Do I have to remind you of how I’ve been covering for you since that little incident at the start of your employment?”

Colin let his words hang and the awkward silence was starting to piss me off even more.

“I didn’t know that the glass would-” I began to protest but Colin just waved off my words like I had farted or something.

Colin gave absolutely no fucks despite my words.

“What’s happened’s, happened. Get to the front desk.”

“Colin man I ne-“

Without even letting me finish he just turned around and left for his lunch. What a fuck-nugget.

With some more urgency I gathered up the leaflets and walked to exit the storage room. Moving through the hallway, I went towards the front desk and saw that it was actually being manned by someone. Lucy was here so I wondered what the problem was and why the hell Colin dragged his greasy ass to mess with me but then I instantly remembered that 'who' was the problem.

Crazy how the stereotypical, antisocial emo wouldn’t particularly be the most approachable choice to welcome potential visitors. Lucy noticed me despite her earbuds in as well as her comb-over that covered her right eye. She nodded and I returned the gesture. Most of the time she didn’t even acknowledge my presence or anyone else’s.

“Colin ask you to come?” she asked, not looking in my direction.

“Yup,” I said as I added the pamphlets to the right stack and tidied the rest of the freaking front desk while I was at it.

She said nothing more and I just shot a look at her staring at the phone screen.

When I first started here, the manager who interviewed me was meticulous and if one thing was out of place on my resume, I was sure I wouldn’t have gotten the job. So consider me shocked when I found out that Lucy had practically been handed her position, as the manager was a close friend of Lucy’s mom.

I was a little pissed at first but then the anger didn’t really linger long when I realised she was practically forced to be here.

The fact that I considered her to be really cute at the time might have played a small part in it, but I had never worked up the courage to ask her out. God knows it wasn’t for a lack of support on Sophie’s side.

The rest of my shift came at a decent pace and none of the questions from visitors were too complex but it wasn’t easy, that’s for sure.

“Excuse me,” came a voice younger than I was accustomed to at work.

It was a young girl that looked to be around thirteen.

“Hiya, what can I help you with?”

“Umm can you help me...” she started to say but I already knew what she wanted to ask.

“…find the Churchill Exhibit?” I smiled.“Sure thing, it’s on the second floor, just take two lefts.”

“Thanks.”

The girl almost raced off past the desk to head up the stairs, she must have missed the rest of the school trip that came in earlier for some reason. She had looked excited too, and I for one was glad to see that there were still children like her. I had spent quite a bit of time in museums when I was younger by myself, observing paintings, sculptures, and all sorts of unique exhibits that were primarily history-related.

More time went by and I couldn’t help but rest my chin on my elbow due to the lack of activity but I quickly shot up when I caught the sight of a beautiful woman approaching the desk.

She had long brunette hair, green eyes, and wore glasses.

“Heey,” she greeted with a slight tilt of her head.

“Hello- hello,” I returned her greeting but what forced her to repeat the word, adding some testosterone the second time round.

“I was wondering when the NEKO exhibit was going to take place?”

I nodded my head before logging on to the museum system to double-check her inquiry.

“It looks like the exhibit won’t be up and running for a few weeks,” I explained to her, “but if you give me your email I can send you an alert...and if you send me your snap-chat we can have a fun conversation about other exhibits here at the museum.”

The words sounded a lot smoother in my head, but as each word came out I had to fight the need to cringe at them. Fuck it, at least I had the stones to say them in the first place.

She gave that all too familiar awkward laugh while doing her best to keep it from sounding awkward.

“My email is [email protected],” she answered, carefully omitting her Snapchat username.

I just simply smiled and entered the information into the museum’s system.

“That’s all done for you,” I informed and the woman nodded politely and turned on her heel to leave.

“That could have been worse,” Lucy muttered off to the side.

That was when I suddenly remembered that she was there with me. I wasn’t sure whether she was trying to give me props or make fun of me.

The remaining hour went by and the museum was approaching closing time.

“You head on out,” I told Lucy, “if Mr. Fowley asks, I’ll let him know you were minding the desks till the end”.

She nodded and left. I let out a deep sigh, even though I shouldn’t have been at the desk for this long, I still found the experience somewhat enjoyable. My attention was brought back to my surroundings by the sight of yet another beautiful woman approaching the desk. On the other hand, this newcomer’s looks eclipsed the last and I actually knew who she was.

As my best friend walked in, the few eyes in the foyer all gravitated to her. Sophie had mauve hair with lighter shade highlights that blended together like a brush. It was styled in a short messy bob that framed her beautiful features; the tips matching her violet eyes, a round button nose, and full lips.

Her expression was that of a cheery young woman and that was how she carried herself, most of the time, but I always had the subtle feeling she was into some extra wild stuff that she didn't let on. It also didn’t help that her body was also as sinfully sexy as her face.

“Hey, Niko!”

“Hey, Soph.”

“Did you get my message?”

I blinked and reached into my back pocket for my phone. Pulling it out, I saw a few unread message notifications and guessed they were from her telling me she was on her way.

“Didn’t have my alert on,” I explained with a small smile, “gotta stay off while I’m at work. Not gonna risk breaking any rules so early in the job…”

She gave a little shake of her head.

“Are you ready to leave?” she asked.

“Sure, just need to wait for Colin to know, and then we’re good to go.”

I turned to check if Colin was on his way and thankfully he was indeed approaching the desk. He held a grimace as he locked eyes at me but that soon changed when I guessed he caught sight of Sophie. His eyes were glued to her for a long while, even when he reached he stared before he acknowledged me.

“I’m signing off,” I told him.

“Not yet,” he replied, and then he turned to smile at Sophie who returned the gesture with a lot less enthusiasm.

I cocked my head from side to side for an explanation.

“You missed a box,” he informed me, still looking at Sophie before turning to address me. “You need to put it away.”

“We’re not even going to need those pamphlets for weeks,” I protested, “can’t you just let me handle it when I’m next in?”

“No, go do it now Niko.”

I tightened my jaw before looking at Sophie, who gave me a reassuring smile. Turning around I headed towards the storeroom while I heard Colin start a convo with Sophie which might prove to be very entertaining later.

After searching the space I found the box I had missed on purpose, it was far off to the side. With some effort, I placed it with the rest of the others which wouldn’t have been a problem, except for the fact that I had to do a quantity check again and sign it out on the inventory checklist. I could have just ticked off all the necessary boxes but I didn’t want to take any chances that things might reflect badly on me, especially with a fucking snake-like Colin as a colleague. Going to each package one at a time. Once that was done I locked it up.

I returned to find Colin and Sophie just finishing their conversation, with the former looking awfully pleased with himself.

“Satisfied?” I asked flat-faced. “Maybe you want me to do your taxes as well?”

“See you Monday.”

He dismissed me and I couldn’t have been more pumped to finally leave. I headed to the exit with Soph but before we left through the double doors, I took in the late afternoon warmth and the amber sky that was just beginning to darken.

“Rough day?” she asked.

“I’ll let you in on my sorrows on our way there if that’s okay with you.”

She made a noise in agreement so we headed down the stairs and towards Sophie’s car. We got in and as I sat down I removed my employee badge, taking a deep sigh after doing so. I honestly was so psyched for the weekend, now that work was done. Loved the place but there were certain irritations that I was still getting used to.

Sophie started the car and began driving away towards the road leading out of the campus. It wasn't until we had left the area and were on the main road did Sophie speak up first.

“Colin has a small dick.”

“Oh, I could have guessed that,” I said bemused.

“Yeah but,” she started with a shit-eating grin, “he really does have a small dick, he told me.”

I couldn’t help the laugh that followed after what I heard just head, hell she even joined in with me.

“The conversation just started off with how you were getting on at work,” said Sophie as she turned a corner, “to eventually his lack of self-esteem and how that stemmed from his…below-average qualities.”

“Interesting,” I commented.

“You find small dicks interesting?”

I slowly turned my head in Sophie’s direction and let a light pause fill the car.

“The year is twenty-twenty Miss Bloom,” I declared,"therefore, you should be more open-minded and I don’t appreciate your chastising tone either.”

She rolled her eyes and just smiled.

“I’ve got some good news for you though,” she began but left a brief pause of her own for some dramatic effect. “I asked him to be more lenient with you at work. Maybe even put in a good word for you to the museum manager.”

“You did?” I asked skeptically.

She nodded her head.

“Yeah, he said something about you having a review soon, so I may have advised him… to you know, speak in your favour.”

A stupid smile erupted on my face and Soph took a split second look at me before letting out a sigh and pushing my face away from her. But it was at that moment when I came to a realisation and my smile switched up to a frown.

“Did I say something?” asked Sophie.

I shook my head.

“No not really it’s just…” I turned to look at her again once more. “I’m really grateful for the help but I feel like I never get anywhere on my own.”

“Well that’s not necessarily true or even a bad thing,” she replied supportively. “You’ve only been at USP for roughly a month, so you just need more time to adjust.”

“Yeah…”

She was probably right but it still didn’t help me feel any better. Sophie hadn’t seen me before I started university, I don’t think there’s anyone I can ever ask what I was really good at. Things took a better turn when I had successfully landed a job at a museum that would help my career prospects, but unfortunately, I had been saddled with the biggest ass-hole of a work colleague. I would have preferred to deal with him on my own, but who was I kidding.

Focusing on the woman walking her dog on the pavement, I did my best to distract myself from self-pity. I had had enough of that in my childhood and even growing up but still…

Soph let out a deep sigh so I turned to maybe reassure her again but she was already speaking.

“Fine, if it will help, I can show you my boobs to cheer you up.”

Like any red-blooded male post-puberty, I was incensed at the opportunity to gaze at a pair of perfectly proportioned breasts. Within the split second my imagination went wild, I reminded myself who I was speaking with.

“I hope you’re satisfied Sophia,” I said returning my chin to my palm as if I was upset, “you just deepened my anxiety.”

She let out a laugh that was actually kind of musical.

“You’re no fun,” she drawled.

“No, lately I’ve just settled for being made fun of.”

Soph raspberried like a toddler and so I couldn’t help but chuckle. I was definitely glad for someone like Sophie, she had a great sense of humour if not a bit too perverted. But hey, who was I to talk.

“During high school when I wasn’t the masterful comedian I am now,” I started, “I wasn’t really popular. So not only was it difficult to build genuine friendships but it meant I got a lot of unwarranted attention for individuals who preferred to be more expressive with their fists than well-formed arguments.”

Out of the corner of my eye, I could see my best female friend scrunch up her face.

“Yeah, not fun. True I could have tried a little more in class but I wasn’t a bad student, barely got sent to detention, gave in most of my homework but I don't think there's actually anyone who would still remember who I was.”

“But things are different now,” Sophie reminded me. “You have a job that you’re proud of and don’t forget those gains you’ve been making recently.”

I brought up my left arm to flex and surprise surprise, the size was the same. Once I was done with my lacking demonstration, I turned to face the beautiful driver to speak.

“Go on…”

She smirked at me, scrunched up her nose, and tried to come up with more sweet-nothings.

“Didn’t you say you were putting more hours into work as well? Who knows, you might get a pay raise when you get off probation.”

That would be unlikely as hell considering my current circumstances. Sure Mr. Fowley was one hell of a guy but I didn’t think he liked me that much. Even if that were the case and Mr. Fowley gave me that pay raise, Colin would no doubt get salty about it. He might expose me for my screw-up in the initial week of work out of spite.

Like some sick joke, my mind found another fault with what should have been a pro.

“Speaking of overtime,” I told her as I ran my finger under my bottom lip, “I just remembered that my extra hours are now going to cut into my lectures.”

“That’s not a big deal,” Sophie pointed out and she was right.

“True,” I said, “but I don’t want to make a bad impression with my lecturers.”

“Right…” Sophie said as she rolled her eyes and shook her head.

What? I liked to be careful.

“Sorry but not all of us can get people to like us just for existing,” I informed her as I eyed her mouth-watering curves.

I think I might have seen a hard edge in her eyes for a microsecond before her expression turned perky again.

“You don’t know what you’re talking about,” she chuckled like I was crazy.

“Sophie,” I said placing my fingers on either temple, “you could literally walk on the street and homeless people would give you their offerings.”

“I wouldn’t accept any of it…”

“A-ha!” I said pointing my finger at her in accusation. “So you do acknowledge that your very existence is like cocaine to everyone around you.”

“I guess…but that’s still no reason to give up,” she reminded me.

“I know that,” I retorted like an exasperated eleven-year-old.

We didn’t speak for the rest of the car journey and a few minutes later we were at our destination.

A large apartment complex near the center of the city.

“Well here we are,” said Sophie as she put down the handbrake.

Her tone let me know that she was a little disappointed about seeing me off, and it was the little things like that that made Sophie’s friendship irreplaceable.

“Zack and I haven’t had a chance to hang out recently,” I informed her. “He’s been busy, plus you and I haven’t exactly been wanting in terms of ‘quality’ time.”

“I just, you know…”

“Are you still on about that?” I said with a grin. “He may look like a thug but he isn’t a bad guy.”

I thought.

“Fine, I get it, you’re a boy so you’re going to need boyfriends-”

“You mean guy friends right?”

Sophie just stared at me neutrally, not saying anything.

“Did I stutter?” she asked with an arched eyebrow. “Also could you not interrupt me as I tell you what friends you can and can’t have.”

I clamped down on a laugh to go along with Sophie’s mock-serious expression and solemnly nodded my head.

“Thank You. Now, where was I, oh yeah boyfriends? I get that you’re a guy and there may be somethings you may not be comfortable talking about-“

“Oh God, please can we not…” I half moaned half chuckled as I pinched the bridge of my nose.

“Niko, what did I just tell you?” she asked as her eyes went wide and her eyebrows went up.

I put out my arms in supplication to let her know I wouldn’t interrupt anymore.

“So yeah, I can totally talk about guys' stuff with you. Like boobs for example.”

“Boobs?” I asked deadpanned.

She nodded her head and I couldn’t tell if she was being legit.

“Boobs?” I repeated once more.

Sophie nodded even more fervently and we both starred at each other for a good number of seconds.

“I’m getting the fuck out,” I told her as I went for the door handle.

Sophie squealed as she reached over to stop me, even though I had no clear intention of leaving yet, one of her boobs rubbing against my chest.

Nice.

“But you get what I mean,” she said once she had returned to her seat.

“I know,” I said nodding, but then I put a little more seriousness in my voice. “You don’t actually think guys just sit around having full-blown conversations about women’s breasts do you?”

“You talk about ass as well?” she asked as if I was splitting hairs. “You know Jess-”

“Nope,” I almost shouted, “you will absolutely not tell her anything about my fascination with buns.”

If Soph included both the topics of me and ass in a conversation to Jess, she would undoubtedly take it the wrong way and there was a good chance that whatever counted as a friendship between us would evaporate before it even existed.

“Fine,” Sophie moped.

I sighed in relief and took a breath.

“She does have a nice ass though,” I commented.

“Right? That girl’s had to be in at least a hip hop music video or two.”

We both laughed at our shared joke for a bit before just smiling and shaking our heads ever so slightly at each other.

“Well thanks for the lift again Soph,” I said with a genuine smile.

“Anytime dude.”

As I opened up my door, I felt Sophie’s hand tug on the crook of my arm so I turned to her.

“Not yet,” she said giving an unfamiliar look.

“Sure,” I said moving my hand but not closing the door shut. “What is it?”

“I just thought of a way to cheer you up,” she said with a wide smile, “I don’t think this one is gonna have a downside either.”

I scrunched up my mouth.

“Do your worst.”

Sophie proceeded to do the complete opposite of what I could have imagined as she pulled me in for a deep kiss. The move caught me completely off guard and I was momentarily lost in the sensation of Sophie’s tongue exploring my mouth. Once I finally regained my senses, I returned Sophie’s attention but with far less finesse, I didn’t think I was a bad kisser but I’d be lying if I said I was good as I thought I was. Honestly, I didn’t even give a shit right now, I was making out with a girl who was in a completely different lane to me.

As the kiss extended, the sensation started to get more…intimate as I was able to match Sophie’s rhythm and for some strange reason, I felt like this was her doing.

Sophie placed her palm on the side of my face as she slowly backed away to look into my eyes, she was still insanely close and her purple eyes seemed to light up and glint as they searched my soul.

Man was I in a daze.

After she found whatever it was she was after, Soph adjusted her hand to wrap around the back of my head and pulled me in deeper in her pursuit to ravage the back of my throat with her tongue.

I had no idea how long the kiss had lasted but when we pulled away from each other slowly it felt just, unreal and I couldn’t place what the cause was.

“What was that?” I said as I blinked a few times.

“Just something I have been wanting to do for a good while,” she replied after using her thumb to wipe away some excess saliva.

The gesture caused a sudden twitch in my pants and my eyes flashed southward and I tried my best to hide my sensitive area away from Soph.

She was onto my attempts and burst out laughing, the back of my neck instantly began to burn up.

I just had possibly the best kiss of my life so far or hell even my entire life, her catching a glimpse of my eggplant was a small price to pay. Sophie then faced me as she put her arms under her amazing bust.

“I’ve been weirdly attracted to you for a bit Niko.”

I was confused and turned to her but then she looked in the direction of my crotch. As expected, the embarrassment came back so I looked away from her as she laughed at my expense.

“It’s true,” she said after calming down a bit, “I’ve really been into you ever since we met.”

“Then how come you’ve never said anything…”

“I had my reasons,” she said with a smile. “Sorry about this?"

I started to speak, I wanted to tell her that there was no need for her to apologise for keeping her feelings from me. I wanted to tell her that even if there was the slightest chance we could make it work I was more than willing to try at least with a date or two.

But before I could even get a full word out, Sophie’s purple eyes began to glow as her fingers caressed my face. They had always stood out to me and I just wrote them off as some unique genetic trait she had, she was an extremely one-of-a-kind specimen after all.

My vision began to fade in and out as my head lay against my headrest and I felt my lids get heavier.

“Niko? Niko, get up, we’re here.”

I blinked as I woke up to some jostling from Sophie.

I stared at my hands for a moment but didn’t know why. For some reason I felt like I was forgetting something but what did my hands have to do with it.

“Niko?”

I turned to look at Sophie.

“What?” I asked discombobulated.

“You passed not long after we started driving.”

“I did?” I said as I placed my palms on my lap.

The last thing that I remember was Sophie talking about her breasts, and then I blinked, and then there was this conversation.

I looked at Sophie and just shrugged.

“I’m tripping balls or something,”

She just smirked and leaned in to peck me on my cheek.

“I best get going,” I told Soph as soon as I went for the door and I noticed that it was open.

Strange.

“See you later Romeo.”