“Officer! Are you there? Over,” blared the radio.

“Yes, Officer Bouncer reporting. Who is this? Ruff.”

“Eric Smythe, Head of FOG. Over.”

“What? The weather people?” replied Officer Bouncer. “I’m a little busy here.” Officer Bouncer was in the middle of one of the most fierce mini-battles of the war so far. Four Rearguard Beagles ships were surrounded by what must have been a hundred Crawkling ships to begin with. They were down to about fifty, but this was still a vast number to keep your eye on at one time. If Officer Bouncer was honest, it was probably harder than when there was a hundred. It was well known that Crawkling soldiers were out for themselves more that the team, and the first part of the war was always settling petty little vengeances. The “friendly-fire” seemed to have stopped, so the Rearguard Beagles would have to take down the majority of the rest of these ships themselves.

Fortunately, Officer Bouncer had attended many Flying Under Considerable Distraction lessons, so even though he was chatting to Eric Smythe, he wasn’t (F.U.C.D.)

“That’s what everyone thinks. We’re actually the secret police. I’ll keep this short though, I don’t want to ruin your battle. I understand that there are difficulties maintaining contact with Flight Cruiser Lexonus, so for the moment I have taken charge of strategy. Over.”

“That’s not a good idea, Sir. Without wishing to sound rude, you are not familiar with Basic Beagle Warfare. Over. Ruff.”

“I have plenty of experience thank you,” replied Eric Smythe. “And besides, I’m putting every tactic past Officer Howler first.”

“Worries vanquished,” replied Officer Bouncer. “Howler is one of the best.”

“Excellent. You may have noticed that your radar has become a little sparse.”

“I had. Ruff.”

“That’s because all Beagles are turning off their radars. There are still thousands of you. I need you to finish what you are doing, and retire to co-ordinate 23423484729. We are lining up an ambush.”

“An excellent plan,” replied Officer Bouncer. “I’ll let you know when I’m there. Ruff.”

It didn’t take Officer Bouncer long to lose his enemy, and retreat to the position he had been told. Rearguard Beagles loved a good ambush, this was proper warfare.