《Cowboys and Wizards》S01E01 - Summoning
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Cowboys and Wizards
S01E01 - Summoning
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The world has gone mad.
Global pandemic. Civil protests. Riots. Inept leadership. Corruption. Propaganda.
World powers shifting uneasily as tensions rise.
World War III feels like it’s just one wrong move away.
And I’m trapped here in my crappy little apartment because of quarantine.
Well, not trapped exactly. I could go out and participate in socially distant activities, or join the protests downtown, but I’m too damn depressed to get off the sofa. With everything shut down, I’m currently unemployed and living on the last of my savings, which consists mostly of ramen and canned veggies. My current hobbies include selling everything I own for rent money, lying on a sofa that was abused by a fraternity back in the 80s, and distracting myself with a crappy smartphone that was outdated when I bought it three years ago. I’d sold everything else. Television, game console, tablet, computer, and all my games. Material things don’t matter when you don’t have a place to store them.
“I’m not a loser,” I whisper to myself. “I’m not stupid. I’m a hard worker. I’m just stressed and depressed as fuck.”
A century ago I could have just headed out into the wilderness and been a prospector, panning for gold and silver in the hills. I could have hired out as a cowboy, riding the open range and herding the cattle for one of the big ranches. Or been a hired gun. Or a bounty hunter. Considering how desperate I am right now, I would probably fall into a gang of outlaws robbing stage coaches and banks, vanishing across the border to drink and gamble until the money was gone.
Good thing I’m not much of a drinker, I guess.
*Ding*
A text interrupts my idle contemplation of shadows on the ceiling. I lift my crappy smartphone off my chest and thumb open the message app. It’s a group text from my boss at iBox Co.
“Hey guys. I know this is a crappy way to deliver the news, but I gotta close the business. Thanks for all the hard work and good luck in the future.”
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I drop the phone back onto my chest and it pulses faintly with the beating of my heart.
*Ding*
I check the new text. It’s from my mobile service provider.
“Your automatic bill pay has failed. Please update your account or call the service department.”
Well, duh. No job, no money. No money, no life. Rent due at the end of the week. Supposedly they can’t evict you during quarantine, but they said nothing about the land lord disconnecting the water and power. John down in apartment 2B has been living like a caveman for the last 3 weeks, stubbornly refusing to move out. I wonder if that’s how I’ll end up? Alone in the dark, cooking ramen over a candle.
*Ding*
*Ding*
*Ding*
A quiet rage builds in my gut. Bad news, bad news, bad news. Nothing but bad news and more bad news. Disowned by my parents. Kicked out of college for poor academic performance. Scholarship gone. Girlfriend gone. Job gone. Money gone. Frustrated at my helplessness, I clench my fist around the phone and fling it behind me.
*Smash*
“Ah shit,” I grumble aloud, instantly regretting my impulsive action and rolling over to survey the damage.
The remains of a cheap framed mirror I had bought a yard sale hung on the wall, smashed into pieces with my smartphone sticking through it like a ninja star. “How the heck did that happen?” I asked myself, staring in disbelief. I liked that mirror. It was one of the first non-essential purchases I had made and I thought it gave the otherwise bare wall some needed character. Now it was shattered into pieces just like everything else.
Crawling off the ratty sofa, I walked over to examine the damage. Pieces of thick glass hung from the frame like jagged teeth, reflecting a too-skinny body in a dozen slivers of reality. My cheap smartphone was embedded in the middle of the mirror and apparently halfway into the wall behind it. Prying away a few shards to survey the damage, a strange pattern was revealed on the wood panel underneath the glass. Wriggling a larger piece loose cost me a nasty slice on my finger. I sucked on coppery blood while picking away the remainder of the glass. When everything was clear, my phone was revealed to be smashed through a silvery spiderweb of lines and symbols, apparently merged with the wall like a piece of modern art.
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I tried to pull it loose with my good hand, but it was wedged in there tight. Gripping with both hands I tugged and twisted until it was slick with blood from my finger. “What the actual hell?” I said, peering at point where the phone merged with the wall. I ran my fingers around the edge of the phone, trying to find where it was stuck and smearing the entire area with bloody fingerprints until it looked like a crime scene.
I gripped it again with both hands and began tugging.
*Ringtone*
My phone began to buzz and vibrate in my hand while the lyrics to AOP played. The strange silvery pattern my phone was embedded in lit up like a Christmas tree, glowing with thousands of colours that began chasing each other in time with the music. I instinctively jerked away, but my hands were stuck to the phone.
I couldn’t let go. My fingers were welded to the device! Panicked, I flopped around like a fish on a hook as the light crawled over the phone and up my arms. Some force yanked me into the wall up to my elbows and I started screaming like a little girl with a spider in her hair.
Then it pulled me completely into the wall.
I disintegrated into a cloud of artificial confetti, falling through synthetic colours and genetically modified sounds. Nothing made sense. The world was a boiling pot of salty madness and I was a shattered jar of elbow macaroni. Eternity passed in a cloud of steam.
“Ah, poor lost thing. What are you doing here?”
A soothing voice laid a foundation in my consciousness and I grabbed at it.
plehhhellephelpeeemeehelpmme
“You are near dissolution. I’ll do my best.”
Invisible fingers pushed and tugged and squeezed and formed the clay of my existence back into me. The last few months of my life flipped by, an embarrassing montage of manga, anime, Red Dead Redemption, and masturbation. Lots of masturbation.
“I’ve done everything I could. I’ll try to send you back where you belong. Your kind is not meant to be here without a guardian, remember that.”
Glass shattered into a million fragments as I emerged from that realm and tumbled across the ground.
I sucked in a deep breath, choking on soot and the distinct aroma of bird shit.
When the world stopped whirling around me, I opened my eyes. Above me were burnt rafters covered in bird shit and the remains of a roof. Sunlight painted one soot-covered stone wall in the golden hues of a summer afternoon. After a moment, I realised that I felt pretty good. Really good. Like I could run a marathon. Climbing to my feet, I wiped my grimy hands on my shirt. The back was probably smeared with shit and soot already, so keeping the front clean didn’t make sense.
The room was a ruin. A fire had obviously raged through here some time ago. A chair was collapsed in a corner near a fireplace, along with what appeared to be the remains of a table. Shattered bits of glass were scattered all around what I could only assume was a mirror frame, the one that I had exited from. A large mound of mushrooms and ferns grew in another corner on what was possibly a bed at one time. Behind me a fire ravaged door hung on blackened timbers.
*System Restart*
I blinked at the text hanging in the air.
-= NOTES =-
[CAST]
Vincent J. Carter
[PLACES]
Earth
Crappy apartment
Ruined room
[PEOPLE]
[OTHERS]
-=- PERSONAL -=-
[[ Next chappie Wed 25Nov20 ]]
Currently in queue: S01E02 - S01E10
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