《The Devil is a Stoner》Chapter 15: Shattered Dreams
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I hope he didn't sell it already...
Cole had just woken up and headed straight towards the Glass store to get his bong. It was supposed to be retrieved last evening, but Cole had forgotten it after eating seven cookies. His brain was still running quite slow, which was expected considering the amount of THC he had consumed the day prior.
What the fuck did we even do last night other than eat and pass out?
Cole couldn't remember much of anything since he had been so high. He wasn't wrong though, as the only thing he did after eating the cookies was eat and pass out. Still, it was an enjoyable night.
He was now at the Glass store's doorstep. The old man most likely still has the bong, but Cole had promised to pick it up at a specific time. He didn't feel too good about being late and making the owner worry. He entered the store, hoping for the best.
"Welcome to the Glass store! Oh, it's you again! I made the 'bong' you requested."
"Hey! Sorry, I'm late. Yesterday some stuff... happened."
"It's fine. I had a lot of fun working on this yesterday. Here!"
The old man didn't seem angry at all and handed over the bong. Cole examined it and could describe it with one word. Beautiful. It was just like his blueprint, if not better. He would have expected medieval craftsmanship to be much worse than modern machines, but that didn't seem to be the case. The old man is truly a master of his craft.
"Oh, wow! This is better than I could have ever imagined! Thank's a lot!"
"Haha, I'm glad you like it! I should also be thanking you. Because of your blueprint, I managed to make my own piece as well. Take a look!"
The old man looked proud as he handed something to Cole. It was a glass pipe. It looked exactly like one of those wooden tobacco pipes but made of glass instead. Someone had already invented a pipe without Cole's help in the new world. This was quite surprising.
"Wow, you made a pipe?"
"What? Do you mean this is called a pipe? Am I not the first to make one?"
"Yes, this is called a glass pipe. I'm surprised you could come up with the design on your own!"
The old man was slightly disappointed to hear it wasn't his invention. However, Cole was impressed and gave him a small tip. His earlier worries had been for nothing, as the old man didn't seem too bothered by the late pickup.
Cole realized he didn't even know the name of this amazing craftsman. He wanted to ask but still avoided even slightly awkward conversations due to his social anxiety. After the incident with Fellia though, Cole knew he had to confront the issue head-on.
"Can I ask you something?"
"Yes, what is it?"
"What's your name?"
The old man thought Cole was going to ask something big. Instead, Cole just asked for his name. He thought this was funny and laughed.
"Haha, is that it? My name is Geralt. What about yours?"
"It's Cole. Nice to meet you Geralt!"
The two shook hands. Just asking for a name wasn't nearly as bad as Cole remembered, and he felt stupid once again. He thanked Geralt before leaving.
Cole wanted to work together with Geralt to make all kinds of smoking equipment. He thought of how cool it would be to sell pipes and bongs to all citizens in town. Just imagining the streets filled with bongs made him smile. It would be cool to start selling them right now. However, he wasn't in the mood to talk business and decided it would be smarter to come back later with a plan. Right now, he just wanted to test out the new bong.
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When even was the last time I smoked out of a bong? It feels like years. I can't wait to show this thing to Rogg and Fellia!
He headed back towards the Drug Store in a good mood.
The ruckus around the Drug Store had finally died down. Every now and then, people bought large amounts of weed, but things had calmed down for the most part. The rich people in town often bought more than 50 grams at once. Because of them, the drug store still sold a lot of weed even with fewer customers. Cole liked this quite a lot, as it meant he could relax more. Even retrieving his bong would have been difficult if things hadn't calmed down.
"I'm back!"
"Ooh, Cole! Is that the new smoking method? It looks awesome!"
Cole entered the store and was greeted by an excited Rogg. You could see stars in his eyes while he closely examined the bong in Cole's hand.
"Yep, It's called a bong. Let's light this bitch up!"
"Hell yeah! I have something to show you as well. Check out the living room!"
The two headed into the living room, leaving the Drug Store empty. Customers would have to wait, but they didn't care. Hitting the bong was way more important. Cole had no idea what Rogg could have done to the living room. He was gone for just two hours, and Rogg should have been working meanwhile. Whatever he had done better have been worthwhile. They were just outside the living room door now. Rogg stopped and looked like someone who had prepared a surprise birthday gift.
"So, yesterday I got really pissed off at our chairs and decided we needed an upgrade. That's why I got one of my friends to bring us these. Check this shit out!"
Inside the living room were two brand new sofas. One of them was large enough for three people, and the other a bit smaller. They looked quite fancy and had red cushions.
"Wow, nice thinking Rogg! These look awesome! Much better than those piece of crap chairs."
Cole sat on the large sofa and poured water into the bong. The sofa was very soft. One could easily fall asleep on one. It was just perfect for passing out after smoking. It almost felt nostalgic to sit on a sofa after so long.
"Ahh, this is perfect. How much did these cost?"
"Umm... A gold coin each..."
Rogg wanted to avoid the question but knew Cole would just ask again. Two gold coins was a fairly cheap price for two sofas, but he didn't know how Cole would react to spending money. Luckily, he wasn't mad.
"Two gold coins? Pretty good for these, I would say."
"You think so? Hahaha."
Rogg was relieved and let out an awkward laugh. Sofas are a must-have stoner tool, so naturally, Cole thought of them as a worthy investment.
"Now, it's time for this! Go get Fellia. She needs to experience the greatness of the bong as well."
"Yes! She should be cooking right now. I'll go get her!"
The first bong rip ever was going to need at least two witnesses. This event was surely going to end up in history books. Or maybe not.
Rogg brought Fellia, and the gang was all gathered up, ready to smoke. Cole loaded the bowl to the brim. It easily fit more than a gram at a time.
"Here we go! Fire!"
Cole was ready to hit the bong. He started inhaling and initiated the fire magic. Water started splashing, and smoke entered the bong. He kept going like a mad man and was surely going to kill his lungs with the amount of smoke. Then, it was time to pull out the downstem. Cole inhaled all of the smoke in the chamber at once, barely keeping his lungs intact. The world's first bong rip was a success. Rogg was the first to celebrate, while Cole was trying not to die. He had sacrificed his lungs for the sake of the biggest bong rip, yet still didn't cough a single time.
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"Wow! That looks awesome! Let me try next!"
It was now Rogg's turn. He refilled the bowl and tried to imitate Cole. Rogg had been used to apple pipes, so the larger hits through bongs were quite overwhelming. He managed to defeat half a gram in one go nonetheless. It was just half the amount Cole had taken, but quite a nice rip for a beginner. He immediately fell in love with the bong.
"Cole, how did you come up with this design? I don't think I would ever come up with something as creative as this."
"Oh yeah... that's a design from my home town, haha. Fellia do you wanna try it?"
"Yes, please!"
Cole knew that Rogg would be excited about the bong but didn't think Fellia would be so eager too. She had been sceptical about hitting the apple pipe, but all of that had disappeared when using a bong. Maybe she just doesn't like apples.
Fellia loaded her desired amount of 0,4 grams and proceeded to light the bowl. Cole watched from the side as the water started splashing and smoke filled the tube. He found it quite satisfying to watch her happily take a bong rip. It felt like she was finally getting more comfortable in her new home.
Everyone was now nice and high, but they felt practically sober compared to eating edibles the day prior. It wasn't like their tolerance had gone up by much, but seven weed cookies are just that much more effective than one gram. Still, they were high enough to momentarily forget the Drug Store. Fellia was the first one who remembered.
"Uhm... Did we close the store early today?"
"Oh fuck! We completely forgot!"
The store had been without supervision for around 10 minutes. It wasn't the end of the world, but customers could be slightly confused when no one was running the place. Cole immediately rushed downstairs to check the situation. Luckily there was only one customer waiting. Cole almost didn't recognize him, but there was no way he could forget this person for a second time.
"Howard!"
"Yoo, Cole! You got some weed for sale?"
Howard's character had completely changed. He was holding an apple pipe and was obviously fried as a French fry. Cole had met all kinds of stoners in his past life but never has anyone looked this high. Howard even talked like a teenager who had just taken an 80% THC dab for the first time. The old humble person from just a few days ago was nowhere to be seen. Cole was certainly surprised, but he wasn't one to judge other's habits.
Howard had just bought 500 grams of weed and was already asking for more. This was obviously good for business, but the Drug Store barely had a kilo left. Cole wasn't sure if he should sell the rest just yet.
"Did you already smoke the 500 grams? There's no way, right?"
"Nah, I still have a little bit left. I just wanted to restock before I run out."
A little bit left? Does that mean he smoked nearly 500 grams in under a week? That's impossible.
"You must have given some out to family members, right? There's no way you smoked almost 500 grams alone."
Howard took a large hit out of his apple pipe before responding. It was crazy to see the city's Duke smoking weed so casually. Cole was somewhat proud of his achievement.
"Well, I gave out like a couple of hits... Mostly smoked it myself though."
What the fuck. How is it even possible to smoke that much?
Cole almost couldn't believe Howard, but it had to be true considering his appearance. If it was, then he must have smoked well over 50 grams a day. Cole didn't think he would ever say someone has a problem with cannabis, but this might become the first. The most Cole had ever smoked in one day was 15 grams during a camping trip. 15 grams is considered a huge amount for a human, but 50 grams is on another level. Howard's tolerance must be the highest of anyone in the world.
"Umm... I can sell you a bit, but we only have a kilo left at the moment. You can buy as much as you want once we get restocked."
Just as Cole finished his sentence, the front door burst open. This time there was a white horned demon, who Cole also recognized. It was Artyom.
"Cole! The plants are done! Come outside!"
"Oh hey Artyom... What?! Do you mean they're already fully grown? How is that possible?"
It took a second for Cole to realize what Artyom had said. Cannabis plants usually take at least a few months to grow, yet Artyom had grown them in one week? Cole couldn't believe his words and rushed outside, ignoring Howard. However, Artyom wasn't lying. He had indeed brought a cart full of cannabis plants outside the Drug Store.
"How did you grow them so fast? I thought it would take at least a month!"
"I don't know either. I just planted them, and before I knew it, they had grown huge!"
Seeds from the plants must have been modified with magic somehow. There was no other explanation for this. Cole wasn't going to complain though and examined the plants. They looked just as good as the plants grown outside the magic mansion, just slightly smaller. That wasn't an issue, however, as there were enough plants to last for months.
"Wow, these are perfect! Here."
Cole had promised to pay a silver each for a plant. He didn't even bother counting how many there were and handed Artyom two gold coins. This was basically a scam considering Cole got the money back from less than two plants, but Artyom couldn't have been happier.
"Two gold coins?! I can't believe it! I'll grow as many more as you'd like!"
"Thanks a lot! We're going to need more in about a month."
Cole, Rogg and Fellia started unloading the plants into an empty guest room. After around 10 minutes, almost the whole room was full of weed plants. It was a beautiful sight. Howard watched from the side excitedly as if he wanted them all.
Cole was overjoyed. He would have never expected to live his dream life at such a young age. All that was missing was a television, but that was basically impossible in this world.
Life doesn't get much better than this! Now we can just smoke unlimited weed for the rest of our life! It almost seems too good.
After admiring the weed-filled room, Cole went back to Howard. As much as he wanted to close the store right now, he still had to earn money.
"So, Howard. How much do you want to buy?"
"I want five thousand grams! That should last for a while."
Jesus, five kilos? I hope he didn't see the fact that we paid 2 gold coins for all of these...
"Alright. I'll sell that much for 25 gold coins! That's a huge discount!"
"Deal!"
Cole pretty much scammed Howard out of 25 gold coins. Five kilos was just about four of the new plants, meaning he had paid eight silver and gotten 25 gold coins in return. If word got out, the Drug Store might be in some trouble.
Cole didn't bother harvesting and just gave Howard five plants. Passersby wouldn't believe that he is the town's Duke, as he immediately started smoking it through his apple pipe.
"Holy shit Cole! This is even better than the previous batch! Thanks a lot!"
"I'm glad you like it!"
Just as Artyom had left, another big shot came straight away. This time it was a black horned woman in a military uniform along with four guards. Cole wasn't too happy about this. He had already made 25 gold coins today and just wanted to smoke out of his new bong.
Sigh... Another troublesome person. Can't we just have peace for one second, please?
The situation was odd from the start. Nobody would bring four guards just for a normal visit to a store. Cole could already tell this was going to be a long day. The woman looked quite angry and yelled something.
"So it was the Drug Store after all!"
Howard seemed to know this person and opened his mouth.
"Xylliza? What are you doing here? Are you here to buy weed too?"
"Shut up Howard! You incompetent fool!"
Cole had no idea what was going on. Rogg and Fellia also came outside because of the noise. Xylliza didn't seem to respect the Duke much, which was expected considering how high he was. Cole thought he understood the situation.
Did she come here to arrest the Duke? I mean, I wouldn't be surprised if he got kicked out for smoking on the job...
Cole realized he was wrong, as Xylliza pointed at the Drug Store employees and gave out an order.
"Guards! Arrest those three!"
It wasn't Howard who was getting arrested, but Cole, Rogg and Fellia instead. Cole was shocked and couldn't accept it.
"WHAT, WHY? WHAT DID WE DO?"
Just as Cole had reached his dream, it was getting ruined. He screamed at Xylliza while the guards apprehended them. Even Howard was confused and spoke up.
"Xylliza! What are you doing? You can't arrest them! What have they done?"
"They have been selling poison to citizens of Medoea! This is unacceptable, and they will be placed in jail!"
Once again, Cole's dream had been ruined by the government. He'd had enough of their bullshit and started desperately yelling.
"What do you mean poison!? No one has died, how is it poison!?"
"Silence! Take a look at the Duke! How can you say it isn't poison when the Duke looks like this?"
"It's not my fault he smokes 50 times the normal amo..."
Cole couldn't finish his sentence, as the guard hit him with the back of his sword. They had no intention of talking it out. Cole would have loved to beat all of them up but gave up. It was pointless to struggle for two reasons. If you knocked down a police officer, you would escape the immediate threat, but you could say goodbye to living a normal life. The police would just keep sending more and more people after you until you got caught. The same would undoubtedly happen in this world as well.
The other reason was the woman called Xylliza. She was too strong. Cole sensed the amount of mana emitting from her body and knew he couldn't win. He could have easily knocked out the guards if he wanted to but would have no chance of escaping Xylliza. Resisting the arrest would just end up making the sentence worse, so there was no choice other than to give up.
Dammit... I knew it. This life was too good to be true! I hope there's weed in prison...
"I'm sorry Rogg, Fellia, this is all my faul..."
Again, Cole failed to finish his sentence, as the guards had hit him in the back of the head. He fell unconscious just in front of Rogg and Fellia. He could see how scared they were just before passing out. All he could feel was sadness and anger.
Cole's new life had ended right as it began.
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