Chris: Final

July 17th, 2016

Cody sits down next to me in his newly built treehouse. He’s tangling his leg over the entrance’s age. He stares at the treelines I’m staring at. “So what do you think?”

“It’s good. How much did this cost you?”

“Probably more than I should have,” He chuckles. “This rain man. I always loved it but now? It’s kind of bumming me out.”

“Do you want to talk about it?”

Cody just stares off in the distance then checks his phone. The rain is drizzling but they say it’ll get heavy again. “Why?”

Cody is hurting again. He’s been in guilt over sleeping with Emily two nights ago. He’s been trying to get a hold of her ever since but she’s been ghosting him. I mean I get it. He messed up and doesn’t know what to do. It’s like how I am.

“It’s good to talk about things.”

Cody scoffs, “Man, we haven’t hung out in forever and the first thing you want to talk about is my feelings?”

I laugh, “No, dumbass. What happened? I just want to understand. I thought Emily hated us, why would she sleep with you?”

Cody shrugs, “I was really drunk, she got a little drunk, I don’t know. It just happened.”

“What happened after?”

“She threw up the moment she woke up and realized where she was,” Cody laughs. “She didn’t say a word to me before she left.”

“I’m sorry.”

Cody chuckles, lightly shoving me, “Look at you, since when did you get all talkative?”

“I met a friend,” I smile. Yeah, I just smiled. “Her name is Graceful Farrigan. She’s been helping me see the world differently.”

“Oh yeah?”

“I don’t know. Lately, it feels like I broke through something. As if I forgot something I needed to forget. She gets inside my head like that.”

“Sounds like you should kiss her,” Cody chuckles.

I just shake my head. “She has a nine-year-old kid.” Through Cody’s laughter, I hear the rustling of leaves down below us. He doesn’t notice who just arrived. “You want to know something she said to me that I’ve been thinking about?”

“Shoot.”

“We’re the hands controlling the strings of our destinies. I’m going to head out now,” I say adjusting myself to climb down the Treehouse.

“What? Why?” Cody tilts his head in confusion, “I should add a ramp,” he says to himself.

Once I’m on the soft ground I look up to Cody then at the person who just arrived. “It’s good to see you again, Emily.”

Emily smiles back, “Yeah it is, you look well. You're leaving?” Her eyes are red and irritated. What happened between Cody and her hasn’t been easy on her either.

I nod, then look back up. Cody still hasn’t noticed. He’s too busy humming to himself while he stares at the treeline. “Good luck,”

“Thanks,” she says with her arms crossed.

“Cody!” I yell at him. Once I grab his attention he immediately stands up. That’s when I decide it’s a good time to leave. It’s better if I’m not involved in this.

Nearby the little open field where the Treehouse sits, there’s a creek that’s been expanding thanks to the heavy rain over the past few days. It’s almost like a river now. I stand on a large boulder that cliffs the creek. I think about what Graceful would want me to do right now.

She would say, “jump in!”

It’s all about letting go. Letting go of your insecurities, your doubts, your flaws. It’s about letting go of the self that is scared. So what if I'm supposed to die tonight? So what if I’m trapped in my own mind? I’m not scared anymore. If there is anything I could do it is to defy destiny. Elizabeth did it, why can’t I?

I jump in.

I float on top of the water and observe the grey sky above me. Thought is the enemy. This river is freezing my body but that’s okay. We all travel down the same river seeing the world that we will never see again. We were taught to believe that the river moves straight. We set expectations and goals. We have desires and an illusion that we control our fates. In reality, the river’s nature is to twist and turn. There is an illusion that we all float down our own river. Yet no one stops and sees that each person is in the same stream.

I see now that we as humanity can be free.

Life is not independent but instead, it's connected in the intricate piece of infinity. I’m not isolated from the world even though it feels like it. I see the hurt. I see the struggle and cries as a dull knife is trying to cut through.

The skies clear up for a bit and I see the naked blue.

I hear the shouts of my friend. I can hear the cry from my other friend. They’re hurting together, unable to see how fast they are drowning in the river. They haven’t learned how to properly swim together. Yet, it soon stops.

-

I open my eyes to the sound of the roaring thunder above my head. Everything is dark and I’m unable to see where the creek meets the ground. My body feels like it's pruning away. I finally get up from the water as the lightning lights the night enough to see where I can go.

The rain feels like bee stings each time it hits my bare skin. It’s even harder to traverse through the wet ground which is almost all mud at this point. I wander around, lost but it’s okay. I’ll find my way out eventually.

With each lightning strike, I’m able to familiarize myself with my surroundings. A big one comes. It’s so close that the thunder makes my ears start to ring. The flash is enough to show me where I’m at. I walk forward to where I’m supposed to be.

The LED lights from the abandoned house shine through. I’m here, aren’t I? I can already see everyone inside. Everyone is here, even Lyle.

Destiny. Only very few people are born without free will. Elizabeth was one of them. Somehow, through her own desperation or sheer will, she changed it. I was destined to help the world. When she died, she changed my fate to this very moment. This here, this now is everything that was shown to me by the deity that talked to me.

We all die here.

Fuck that. I’m in control.