"Hubert?" I asked as I raised an eyebrow at the strange little bonehead.

"Such is my name, to be sure. What fool has broke adrift here?" Asked Hubert.

"Um, if you are asking for my name it's Theodore. Shouldn't you be dead?" I asked looking down at the skull.

"There be more life in my pinky than there is in your whole carcass," the upset skull said.

Barry moved over to just behind Hubert and lifted up his foot to crush the skull but I waved him off. I felt bad for the little guy. He was undead, powerless, and trapped which reminded me a lot of myself. I could understand why he was a little angry.

"First, you don't currently have a pinky. Second, why are you talking like that?" I picked the skull up with a hand on each side of him behind where his ears would be if he had any. I thought about his hearing while lacking ears and the mechanics of talking without flesh, but once again decided to just go with it. There was some kind of magic going on and I wasn't about to figure it out.

"A plague on your scurvy head! I've sailed the seas with tougher milkmaids than you!" He did some angry chittering with his teeth but then seemed to relax a little. "Just kill me already."

"Geez, you went from angry to depressed really quickly. What if we could help each other out, Hubert? You scratch my back, I scratch yours?" I immediately regretted saying that as I realized how mean it had been. After all, he neither had the arms to scratch my back nor the back to be scratched by me.

"What means you?" He said graciously ignoring my faux pas.

"If you help teach me about being a pirate I will get you laid to rest so you can have peace," I said hoping that at least some of what the leader skeleton had said had some truth to it.

Hubert paused for a moment and I could somehow tell that he was considering it.

"I swear by all that tis great and good to teach ye what I can bout being a pirate if ye make a vow to lay my weary bones to rest," he said.

"I swear by all that tis great and good to lay your bones to rest if you teach me what ye can about being a pirate," I said as I put my hand over my heart when I spoke the words.

I cradled the skull in the crook of my arm and we walked out of the cemetery. I felt a strange resistance but was able to push through it. "Well we made it out of the cemetery, Hubert. How do you feel?"

"Arrg, it be hard to feel without arms or skin lad," said the skull that clacked as it spoke.

"I meant emotionally more than physically," I said.

"I be a disembodied skull that ye are carrying like a newborn babe, how do ye think I feel emotionally?" He responded rhetorically.

"I will figure out another solution for getting you around," I said as we continued walking back toward Roseglen. We would be walking for a couple of hours and I spent that time thinking up a creative solution to my little skull problem. I also asked Hubert more questions to prepare for my upcoming role.

"So here is my plan so far. Barry and I will travel up through Bettyford and get supplied for our time on a pirate boat. We will then travel North to a seaport and wait for a boat to come in. The hope is to act our way and maybe bribe our way into the crew and then gather information from there until we can figure out a way to tear them apart from the inside," I said enthusiastically thinking it was a pretty good plan.

"Ship," said the unjolly Roger. "It isn't called a boat it be a ship. Unless ye plan on getting onto a vessel with no sails. Also, talk like that may see you ran through with a cutlass or two."

"I'd like to avoid that so I be needing some learning in pirate talk. Arrg, mateys," I said switching mid-sentence into 'pirate-speak'. Barry couldn't stop himself from instinctively facepalming. Hubert probably would've joined him if he had a palm or a face.

"Maybe ye could lay me to rest before ye get killed by angry pirates," said the skull sassily.

"We just need to practice the pirate talk. We can do this, Barry." I looked over at the man who was clearly a little annoyed to have been added to my ineptitude.

"I don't be needing any lessons. I sailed with a crew for a few years and be just fine at not getting run through," said Barry in perfect pirate speech.

"Okay, new plan. Barry and the skull will do all of the talking and I will pretend to not be able to speak," I said.

Everyone seemed to agree that this was a good plan which kind of hurt my feelings. I'd rather not get killed by pirates though so I was willing to play ball. If I didn't see that blinding light for a while I'd be perfectly fine with it.

We got back to town and Nina greeted Shamus with a big hug. Honey came over and gave me a big bear hug. It made me feel a bit better about my weird situation, but not by much.

Nina spoke with Shamus for a bit about nothing in particular and then we all agreed that a late lunch was just what the doctor ordered. We started some of our catch cooking for anyone in town that wanted some. Nina looked uncomfortably at the skull that sat next to me as we ate.

"Do you have to carry that thing around with you? Can't you pop it into your dimensional space or something? I also think it is weird that no one else thinks it is weird to carry around a dead guy's head." It really made her uneasy for some reason. As the skull spoke I realized that I should have given her some sort of warning beforehand.

"I be not a knick-knack! Sorry me disgusting lack of flesh has offended ye! Twasn't aware I be in the presence o' a white ewe lamb," said Hubert a little offended by the woman being put off by him.

"Eeeeek!" Screamed Nina as she dropped her plate when the skull spoke for the first time.

"Mwah-ha-ha-ha-ha!" Laughed the skull. "Bow before the mighty skeletal warrior, Hubert!"

She didn't look amused, but not just at Hubert, she was mad at all of us.

"Sorry, dear. I didn't even think about it since he had been talking so much on the trip back. I had just gotten used to him," said Shamus with his head lowered. He wasn't out of the doghouse and may literally be sleeping with the wolves tonight.

"Sorry, Nina. I made Hubert a promise to lay his skull to rest so he can have some peace," I explained. She lightened up a little when she realized that the little guy was pretty powerless. "Also, I don't know if I could put him in my inventory or if that would kill him or anything."

"No one is putting me in anything called a dimensional space!" Hubert began to calm down after that. Mr. Snuggles had already helped Nina clean up her dropped fish but I didn't think she was too hungry anymore anyway.

"We will leave in the morning for Bettyford," I said. "We will have to find a better way for you to travel." I directed the last part at Hubert knowing that I couldn't just carry him the whole time.

"Arrg. Better days ahead," said the talking skull. It was oddly positive and probably the most optimistic thing I had heard him say in our short relationship. It was also quite possible that he had said it ironically. I fell asleep trying to think of some sort of sling or saddle that could attach him to me securely without me losing functionality.

Mae woke me up in the morning in her customary way.

"Someone just showed up in a horse-drawn wagon in town. You should go check it out," she said after slapping me awake. I jumped out of bed and ran into the town proper from our barn house on the outskirts of town. It didn't take long as Roseglen was a tiny town. I saw the cart and a man in a tophat was unloading crates from the back of it.

I walked up to the man and saw a sign on the side of his cart that read, "Barnie's Exotic Animals for Trade."

My heart skipped a beat as he finished unloading the crates. There were a half dozen in total. I couldn't wait to see what kind of animals he had. I realized that the man was at a fairly advanced age and was surprised at how strong he appeared to be. The white hair peeking out from under his fancy hat and his elegant, white mustache confirmed his many years of life.

"Sir, what animals do you have for trade?" I asked excitedly. He must not have heard my approach from behind him although I wasn't trying to be stealthy at all. I had startled him pretty good.

"Hhhhuuuggaahhh!" He exclaimed as he grabbed at his chest and arms. He fell to the ground and I attempted to catch him but hadn't reacted quickly enough. I tried to use healing magic on him but it did nothing.

Mae flew up behind me. "Oh, dearie. That won't work. He is already gone." She seemed to be trying to make me feel better for accidentally giving the man a heart attack.

"What happened to Unkie Barnie?" Asked a soft voice behind me as I kneeled by the man's dead body.

"He is sleeping. Go get Shamus and Nina please and quickly," I tried to speak as calmly as possible so I didn't frighten the child. I couldn't turn and look at them for fear of them seeing the tears in my eyes. I heard the pitter-patter of little footfalls running away.

Shamus and Nina ran up to me a few minutes later and joined me beside Barnie.

"What happened?" Asked Shamus grabbing Barnie's wrist and checking for a pulse.

"I just asked him what animals he had for trade and he had a heart attack of something," I explained sadly. "It was an accident."

"You sure 'accidentally' kill a lot of human NPCs," said Mae who had to have known that it wasn't a helpful statement.

We sat there as the rest of the town gathered around us and the realization that Barnie was dead swept through the group. Based on the crying, Barnie must have been a frequent and beloved visitor. I hoped that he wasn't actually someone's uncle or grandpa.

I found myself getting mad at Mae for waking me up when she did. If she would've just let me sleep would this man still be alive? I'd never know, but the anger I felt towards her was building the more I thought about the situation.

"Get away from me, Mae," I whispered to the fairy that was sitting on my shoulder. "Leave me alone."

I'd never seen her look so hurt as she flew off.

As people dispersed after a good, long cry I asked Shamus about the animals.

"Should we check on the animals or release them or something?"

"They aren't going to do Barnie any good and they can't stay in the crates," he answered somberly. He didn't seem to hold me to blame but it didn't change how I felt.

I promised myself that I would take care of the animals in loving memory of the beloved man that I had accidentally scared to death.