《Classroom of Doom》Volume 6 - Chapter 39: Guys, Kuzan has a sister.
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Later on that night, at the dining hall.
"Fuuuuh. Cup noodles aren't so bad, after all."
Chicken flavor is alright, but curry flavor is just the absolute best.
Also, shrimp flavor just sucks. It's practically the equivalent of pineapple in Pizza.
Nonetheless, it wasn't me who spoke out those words.
It was the very person that I was ignoring with all my might.
"Hey, Aniki, you want some? I bet you do. Just say it, anytime!"
Why hasn't this retard fulfilled the deal yet?
Did I not make myself clear back when I had my talk with Kuzan at the girls' dorm rooftop?
Also, I know that I'm not eating noodles, but apples are good too.
Quit acting so high and mighty just because you got yourself a cup of noodles, bitch.
"You're still ignoring me, huh...? I see... That's.... No, no, that's fine. I deserve it. After all, I haven't fulfilled the deal yet..."
"Yet?"
Fuck, my tongue slipped.
"A-Aniki! You're back! I thought you were deaf or just mute!"
"I don't care about that. You said yet, what did you mean by that?"
Kuzan's stupid rumbling aside, I'm extremely curious about what he meant when he said that specific word.
And deep down, I want to continue with my silent treatment, but if he truly has a valid saying, then I must hear him out.
"I've explained how I couldn't get any money because my parents didn't believe me, right?"
I'm not too sure if that was the concrete case, but his words don't ring hollow.
"Yes."
But I still fail to see how that's a valid excuse. You can steal constantly from us, but not from your parents?
Stealing money from parents is the most basic of all things.
Before speaking his words, Kuzan, with his chopsticks, grabbed a portion of the noodles in the cup and took them right into his mouth.
Suddenly, this red apple in my right palm is looking inferior.
"So, I should make them believe me."
"That's really nice Kuzan. You do that."
"No, Aniki. I can't do it on my own. I have a bad history of records with my parents when it comes to asking them favors. Let's just say that the tide doesn't go in my favor..."
Kuzan kept on eating the noodles in a rapid manner while still talking.
"But you have to do on your own. No one else will do it for you, Kuzan..."
In a sudden burst of movement, Kuzan put down his cup on the table straight away.
It looked to me that he was forming a grand entrance or that he had something very important to say.
"About that. Something came to me a while ago. Wasn't the main reason why we couldn't leave the school grounds at the end of January because we weren't able to?"
"Mhm? Yeah. We were on the underground suffering the penalty from failing that stupid argument/exam. It's natural that we couldn't take that chance because we weren't allowed to leave the underground back then."
Truly, those were times of unhappy recollection. I think some of King George's whiplashes are still on my back.
Sometimes when sleeping, I can't help but turn around in order to avoid direct pain.
"That's right, but now it's a different story. At the end of this month, we can leave the school grounds for a day, accordingly."
"I know that, Kuzan. What's the point in telling me something that I already know?"
"There is a point. I want you to help me out, Aniki. Since the year is 2020, the last day of February is surprisingly 29th and not 28th. Therefore, on February 29th, I want you to talk to my parents about this!"
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This idiot actually expects me to help him out something that he has to do on his own?
On top of that, he wants me to waste my precious day of freedom in his own endeavor?
"I'm not helping. It's your problem, not mine. We've discussed this."
In response to my flat denial, Kuzan took ahold of my two shoulders right away, while applying considerable strength.
No, he didn't do that to physically pressure me, but most surely, in order to make sure that I didn't take my eyes off him.
"Please, Aniki! It can't be done in any other way! You are the only one who I know that can help me out with this!"
"What are you talking about, Kuzan? I'm pretty sure that there are others who can help you out with your endeavor if you ask them. Also, hands off my shoulders."
"Ahh, sorry."
Kuzan slowly but surely took his stiff hands off my tender shoulders at once.
And with that, he resumed his noodle eating.
Only for a short while though.
"Aniki, others are... Well, how should I say this... They... don't really like me."
"What about Rayazaki though? Weren't you two in very high spirits back then?"
I recall Kuzan and Rayazaki having a heated discussion about Hinagiku and I for sure am looking forward to the time where I will use that whole event to my power.
Your memories might be gone, but not for long, Rayazaki.
"About that... I don't have a problem with Rayazaki. He's a really cool dude. We have debates from time to time and all, so I really don't have a problem. Plus, he's a pretty friendly person to be around now. It's just..."
Why are you so reluctant Kuzan?
The hell.
"Out with it. Now."
I pressured Kuzan into saying what was on his mind swiftly.
"He's not suited for this. I just can't imagine a scenario where Rayazaki would willingly be helpful and against my parents, I need someone who can hold out on his temper pretty well. So, I thought of you, Aniki!"
Kuzan just called Rayazaki useless in a very subtle manner.
For a thief, you are pretty doting sometimes, Kuzan.
"And you are pressuring me into this task because in your mind I am the only competent person? Also, no one likes you because you stole all the food. Take what happened yesterday for example. We all know that Kawahara is the culprit yet the blame just fell massively upon to us..."
"Kawahara was a jerk about it though. He lied through his teeth and didn't even admit! He also didn't face punishment like a brave person like me! He deserves to be crucified!"
No, Kuzan, you really aren't any better than him.
You were a jerk about it too. In fact, you angered the wrath of every single one of us at borderline dawn.
.......!
W-What am I feeling right now?
Who's grabbing my left shoulder?!
"A-A-A-Anikiii!!!"
I quickly glanced at Kuzan and there was a naked forearm surrounding him completely, plus, Kuzan looked absolutely terrified.
"Oh ho! How bold of you two to trash talk in my presence!"
T-That voice...!
It can't be!
"Eeeeek!!! Stay away from me, Satan! I would go every day to the church if I could! I have a healthy sister, she's pretty beautiful, so I'll offer her to you, just don't hurt me! I have a family as well, so don't harm them! I'm really, really sorry!!!"
Oh no, Kuzan is giving in!!
"Auuuh."
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Surprisingly, Kuzan got a small hit on the back of his head. Just a tiny slap yet that was enough to make Kuzan's head shake.
The one who did such was in the middle of the empty space between me and Kuzan and he hastily took that spot without asking.
"What the hell are you talking about? I've got no interest in your family nor your sister. Also, I'm not Satan. Get rid of that misconception."
This person also brought a plate full of french fries and two hamburger stakes.
How though? Did he cook them by himself?
"T-Thank you, Satan..."
"I'm not Satan!"
Kawahara angrily shouted and spilled onto Kuzan's face in a brash manner in response.
Also, Kawahara isn't wearing anything except his pants.
Full naked top.
"So, what were you two talking about me? You got me curious now. Or, did you two think that you could just talk behind my back? Don't be such pussies!"
In addition to those strong words, he was devouring his dinner furiously, without showing any stops of calming down.
He did not even slice his burger in halves and ate that big portion of it with a huge chunk.
This is rare though. Kawahara of all people to be here.
"Nothing..."
Kuzan is trying to pussy his way out, but I'm convinced that that method of doing things will not work here.
"Oh come on! I heard you two! Something about me being the culprit and whatnot! No need to hide it, I know all about it!"
"A-Aniki! He knows!"
Yeah, no shit you idiot. Why do you think he approached us in the first place?
But isn't this situation like good though?
Maybe it's worth trying something here.
"Kawahara, what brings you here?"
"Hm? I already told you, I wanted to listen to what you two dweebs were talking about since it concerns me."
"You lied yesterday, Kawahara... And we got the full blame due to it..."
Not that I was expecting Kawahara to man up and take the blame or anything, it's just plain annoying how I have to suffer double the penalty just because this selfish prick decided to act immaturely like that.
"What are you on about? I never lied though. Tsudo did. Was it not proven? Are you denying a scenario where evidence was shown and used to prove my point? Is that your point?"
And of course, he's just gonna argue this way...
"Well, we don't believe that and we were accusing you of doing the opposite of what you claim."
"Aniki's right! You lied way too hard yesterday just to screw us over!"
Now's not the time to vent over your anger, Kuzan.
With that bald head, unless you are over 30 years old, no one will take you seriously.
"Illogical. All of your accusations are false and I went to extreme borders just to prove it to all of you yet you have the damn audacity to say that I am wrong? That's just sad because it demonstrates how not understanding you people are."
I must say, being in a scenario where you know who the culprit is and yet despite knowing that, the fact that you can't do anything about it just triggers me.
That's why it's meaningless to argue over this.
Kawahara isn't going to tell us the truth, even though at this point it doesn't matter whether he does or not.
"But, it's not really my fault here. Tsudo started this, you two were just dumb to tag along. Get a clue next time. If you lump dumpster fire with dumpster fire the result is explosive. And no, not in a good way."
Now he just called us dumpster fires and equals to Tsudo.
I can't even take that with a grain of salt because he is correct here.
"Are you here to insult us or just to annoy us for the sake of being annoying?"
"Bingo. I like being annoying, and seeing how you two can't do anything about it puts a smile on my face."
Well, that confirms his intentions.
"I see. Then I'm taking my leave then."
I've got no real reason to stay here in this current scenario any longer.
"Aniki..."
But, as soon as Kuzan spoke those words, a strong grip prevented me from leaving the table.
A grip so strong that it entirely phased my whole left shoulder for two seconds.
"Sit down. I have something of urgency to discuss with you two."
"..........."
I took back my seat since this upcoming scenario could lead to a scenario where I would get what I want.
"Wait, you said two... That means I'm included too!"
"No shit."
Kuzan just can't stop making retarded sentences constantly.
Furthermore, Kawahara's ruthless replies do not phase Kuzan at all. It makes me think that Kuzan is deep down a child.
"Before you speak, Kawahara, why us two?"
Why not talk to the rest about this?
"Are you stupid? They hate me right now. You two don't seem to mind me that much, or do you? If you do, then speak out already!"
"N-No, sir! We don't!"
Kuzan gave that reply.
Though, it's bold of you to assume that we just don't mind you just because we let you have a sit on our table.
Well...
That's not really correct.
Kawahara forced himself here so there was no such thing as permissions in the first place.
"Go on."
I also gave my reply to Kawahara who was looking at me with heavy eyes.
"Daniel, your point wasn't half-bad though. If everyone didn't currently hate me, I would discuss this in-group, but right now, that's not an option. Be thankful that I am spending my precious time with inferiorities like you two. Such a grand force of nature like myself stepping into the mortal realm only happens once in a century."
Here we go again.
His delusion is back. That didn't stay away for long.
Also, if your problem is everyone's current hatred, then why would you do something that would obviously incinerate hatred throughout the whole dorm?
Is Kawahara bipolar or is this one of his acts?
"And because of that rare event, I need my pawns to act. You see, right now, I want the girls to get a taste of defeat. It's unforgivable that I lost in the previous exam and thus, that shan't be the case any longer."
Who are these pawns that you speak of?
And, how are you not cold? Even when I'm in my pajamas, I feel chills all over the place.
Is flexing really all that worth it when it's cold that you have to endure as a cost?
Perhaps it's just a minimal partial side effect.
"Since I have no one else but to rely on, under my great guidance, we will surely achieve victory."
Although Kawahara was fluently speaking his mind, Kuzan just couldn't help himself and interrupted Kawahara right away.
"Kawahara, I hate to burst your bubble, but there is no way to achieve victory without us losing. If we were to win in this exam then that means that our partners must win as well..."
I'll have to agree with Kuzan here. There isn't a way to defeat the girls here, because that means defeating ourselves along the way.
And there is absolutely no way that's acceptable.
It's funny that I'm thinking this way when I've already accepted my defeat in the upcoming exam.
"Kuzan, you fool. How could you not realize the mere simplicity that I am bothering to explain to you feeble-minded creatures? Listen up, our victory is their defeat and their defeat can only come with our defeat."
"Goddamn it, I knew it! You are asking us to lose here!"
Considering his words thus far, I'm not too shocked that that was what Kawahara was initially proposing to us. Therefore, Kuzan's sudden burst of anger is understandable, to say the least.
"No... You've missed out my entire point, you idiot. I never said that it had to be us..."
"Wait... Are you saying what I think you are saying, Kawahara?"
I couldn't hide my words any longer when I thought that Kawahara might be up to something like that...
"Huh? What? What do you mean, Aniki? What's happening? Hey, explain. Heeeeeeeey!"
"Kuzan, shut up. Not now. Anyway, what are you plotting exactly, Kawahara?"
The loud sound of his fork clashing with his steel plate marked the atmosphere quickly, but what was more remarkable was his gigantic smirk to me.
"You see all these other dumb fucks? Fuck them. And fuck their partners too. Let's make them all lose."
"But how exactly? Also, why?"
Kawahara is remarkably random the majority of the times but right now he's asking something unreasonable.
"How? There are plenty of ways, really. We could beat them up and by doing so, their physical condition would not allow them to proceed to the physical check-ups. We could just give them food poisoning. That would certainly hit the nail in the coffin. Oh, I know! I'll steal the food once again and they won't even notice. What will this do? Well, will they be able to compete at their best without any physical strength? I hardly doubt that. If we act on time, there will only be this meal left and nothing more!"
For the record, Kawahara's maniac expressions were starting to attract the attention of the rest of the boys and they were most likely starting to suspect that something was up.
"Kawahara, you're insane! Why the hell would we do that?!"
"Don't be such a pussy, Kuzan! You know it will be fun! What do you say, Daniel?"
His eyes were full of wonder and shining with positiveness. It was hard to speak firmly when such a brute person is this eccentric about his own ideas.
Yet I must say it.
"I'm out. I already lost the exam."
"You what?! Already?"
"No need to act surprised, Kawahara. It's just the truth. And, I have no reason to go along with this. I'm not such an illogical person where I will just screw others for the sake of it. Fun is good and all, but I gain nothing here. I am not going through with this one, sorry."
I don't need any more problems right now. Definitely not.
First Yulia and now Kawahara? What's up with this bizarre coincidence? They both are asking me unreasonable demands with little to earn.
"Oh, right. I didn't mention why you two should do this. Excuse me."
See, this is what I mean by bipolar.
He acts high and mighty but then acts polite and apologies. What the fuck?
"I will do everything in my power to make sure that you two never ever fail an exam in the upcoming three years if you vow infinite fidelity to me and me alone. Anything that stands in you two's way, will stand in my way. So, what do you say? Not a bad deal, right?"
It wasn't my intention to get stunned all over the sudden, but it just happened naturally.
My own two eyes along with Kuzan's eyes widened so much in surprise that they were almost out of place for a second.
What Kawahara had just said could be interpreted as manipulation, but he said those words so seriously that I did not sense a single lie in his words.
"Just think about it for a second. All you have to do is grant me the power to control you and I will not only help you out, but I will make sure that in the end, you will escape this hellhole after these three long years. It's not a bad deal, no matter how you look at it."
Certainly, it's not a bad deal.
I just have one major issue with this.
"I suppose I should show you two my seriousness. You two must have something you want right now? Just ask me. As long as it's not something unreasonable or authentically stupid, I will achieve it."
"You can't be serious, Kawahara.... There's no way that you can do them..."
Kuzan voiced his doubts immediately, but Kawahara looked completely unphased as if Kuzan's words didn't reach out to him at all.
"I don't think so. Just say it. I'll do it. Think of this as a token of my sincerity. After I am done accomplishing both the tasks that you, Kuzan, and you, Daniel, will issue me to do, then, you two will witness how capable I am and that I am not lying."
So Kawahara is aware of the major issue which is regarding credibility.
"Then... Can you, along with Aniki convince my parents to give me money to buy food!? Please, it's really important!!"
Okay, why did Kuzan just include me?
Kawahara literally just said that he could do the task yet you just had to include me in it.
There's no way that I'm allowing that.
"Sure-"
"Wait a second, Kuzan. You don't need my assistance here. Kawahara can do all of this on his own."
Or at least according to his own information. It's fine if he screws up because that will just show how not true his words were, which will clear up the misunderstanding.
"Daniel's right, Kuzan. I can do this on my own. As a matter of fact, I am better off doing this on my own."
I twitched my eyebrows uncontrollably in response to those words right away.
"Ah, I see... I thought that Aniki would be able to pull it off, but since you say so..."
"I can be extremely polite and I will talk to your parents in a very persuasive manner. Which is not something that Daniel here can do, since he loses his temper far too easily."
"I do not lose my temper easily..."
I seriously don't. Aren't I a good temper holder? Or am I missing something?
It should be a fact that I am extremely good at holding my temper when I'm able to progressively talk with someone as fragile as Yulia.
I'm getting the hang of holding my temper back.
This is veridic, alright?
"If you didn't, you wouldn't argue back, but you just did. Come on, notice the contradiction in your words, hahaha!"
Kawahara started to laugh so loud that his abdominals contracted profoundly as he grasped his face with his right hand in a psychotic manner.
In that expression that was fully covered by his hand, only his abundant smirk could be witnessed.
He is mocking me.
"Kuzan, change of plans. I'm coming along. I'll treat your sister with care."
I'm not being stubborn here. It would just feel sour if I let Kawahara get this cocky. Especially when he's laughing in such a disrespectful manner.
"Um, Aniki, what does my sister have anything to do with it though?"
"Oh ho? You just couldn't accept defeat huh? That's fine, quitters aren't worthy of being under my command. I expected no less, Daniel!"
Whatever.
"Now that Kuzan has said his share, I'll say mine to test whether or not what you've said is truly verdict or not..."
"Aniki, please don't ignore my question. I'm worried now. Hey, don't ignore me please."
There's no way that Kawahara can do my task. It's strictly impossible.
I'll prove to him just how high is the height of his hypocrisy.
"Go ahead, Daniel."
Confidentially speaking and smiling with security, Kawahara gave me permission to speak my mind.
"Make me pass the upcoming exam. If you can, then I will believe in your ability and my doubts will be clear."
This is sorta cruel from me because I know that there is no way in hell that Kawahara can have the upper edge in this task.
The only ones responsible for the potential victory in my exam are Yulia and I. There's nothing that an outside source can do about this.
In the end, I just launched such an impossible task at Kawahara because he said those words, but they were lies. Also, if he considers this within the limits of stupidity or impossible, then that just goes to show how weak his overall abilities are.
And---
"That's it? Alright, I will do it."
........................
"What? Are you even listening to yourself right now? There's no way that you can do this task! Just stop this river of lies already..."
"It's not a river of lies though. But, I guess actions speak louder than words, right?"
"If you know that, then show me or tell me how I can possibly pass the exam despite all my short-comings."
So far, Kawahara has not given me the answer to this problem that I am facing.
I know for a fact that Kawahara is a compulsive liar, but I'll prove it to him just how much a liar he truly is.
"Today's 23rd, right?"
"Yeah."
Kuzan gave Kawahara the confirmation, but why exactly is the date relevant here?
"Essentially, one day and so hours left. Either come to my room at 24th in the night, except when I'm not sleeping or just talk to me on the morning of the 25th. I will then tell you how to pass this childlike exam with ease. Just don't be surprised when you realize how easy it actually is. You'll feel dumb."
"Big talk... I bet you're not even going to tell me the truth and you're just going to try and screw me over..."
"Daniel, is that what you think?"
"Why would I not think like that? You constantly manipulate those around you all the time and you expect me to suddenly believe you?"
"Ahhhhhhhhh. I see. So that's your doubt. My credibility is low so it's hard to believe and along with the previous acts that have demonstrated my manipulative side, you believe that I am not capable of forming a truthful stance in front of someone."
In the middle of it all, Kawahara got up and started to walk with his back against Kuzan and me.
Yet his words did not stop.
"But, you're wrong, Daniel. And I'll be the one who will prove you wrong. Remember my words, if you want to pass the exam!"
Ultimately, with his stern back showing his vigor figure, Kawahara left the hall without saying anything else.
I can't help but be a little pissed off at his arrogant words...
"Aniki, you still haven't answered my ques-"
"Kuzan, shut up."
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