In a small dark cave, hidden away by fallen tree leaves, there was a small creature that interrupted the natural tranquility as it began to stir. As he came to, he started to feel the soft dirt under his body. That made him stretch his body and open his little eyes.

‘I hate that lunatic.’ Was his first waking thought. ‘I know that lunatic was messing with me; he could have kept me there for as long as he wanted! If I ever see him again… or hear him again, I’ll…I’ll… Well there’s nothing much you can do to a god. I know, I’ll just complain until he gets really annoyed, that’ll teach him!’

‘Ok, enough with the pettiness, I need to move on. It looks like I’m finally in the new world, but where am I though? This feels like a cave, it’s small but nice and cozy, it’ll make a great base for now. Well I think I’m relatively safe for now. I should really check what that lunatic did to me, now that I have some time. So, all I have to think is “status” right?’

Name

Porky (Dan the Ex-Man) Pine

Level

1

Race

Adorable Quick Toed Porcupine (F)

Titles

Vegetarian, Little Critter, 777

Points

0

PR Points

0

Power

0

Speed

2

Defense

1

Soul

1

Skills

Active: Haste+ Lv.1, Iron Skin+ Lv.1, Charm Lv.1

Passive: Adorable Shield MAX, Healthy Digestion MAX, Fortunate Misfortune MAX

‘Wow… there’s no words… almost. There’s just so many things I want to ask, like WHAT THE HELL is up with my name!? How old is that lunatic, five!? And I guess the child also added the pristine points system at least, not that I’m going to use them.

‘Alright never mind that. Next up, my race. Why did adding the word adorable raise my rank from G to F? Come on! Can I at least get some more information!’

Adorable Quick Toed Porcupine (F)

An adorable mutation of the Quick Toed Porcupine. This little Critter is smaller than most other porcupines but is very quick on his feet and is extremely adorable. It likes to hide in burros and climb up trees to find many different types of tasty fruits. He doesn’t like conflict and prefers to run away.

‘Well that was… interesting. Can I see more information about the rest of my stats? How about my “Titles.”’

Vegetarian

Title gained from @#$%*

You’ve lived a life devoid of meat and can understand the importance of fiber.

Grants the Skill: HEATHY DIGESTION MAX

Also grants the ability to sense the presence of Magical Vegetation.

Distance calculated by 100 Meters X Soul Power.

Little Critter

Title gained from @#$%*

As you were born an adorable little Critter, in your heart you will always be an adorable little Critter.

Grants the Skills: CHARM LV.1 and ADORABLE SHIELD MAX

Also makes you forever adorable.

No matter your future evolution at least a part of you will forever be Adorable.

777

Title gained from @#$%*

The only being to ever land on the 777 space on the Cosmic Lucky Wheel

Grants the Skill: FORTUNATE MISFORTUNE MAX

This title makes sure that when you spin any other type of lucky wheel, you’ll get the outcome you most desire.

‘Yup, they’re as weird as that lunatic. At least the ability to find magical vegetation seems like it’ll could be useful, not like that stupid adorable one. But at least I can be sure that the adorable one won’t screw me over, unlike the misfortune one which just screams “I’m going to ruin your day.” Welp, I might as well check out what the skills do, and I can also check on the other two while I’m at it. Skill info please.’

Haste+ Lv.1

When in use, will boost your agility by 10% of your Speed Stat for 5 minutes

Cooldown Time: 1 Hour

Iron Skin+ Lv.1

When in use, will strengthen your body by 10% of your Defense Stat for 5 minutes

Cooldown Time: 1 Hour

‘I hadn’t even noticed that the lunatic added a plus sigh to these skills. Does that make them any different? I guess we’ll find out with time, let’s keep going.’

Charm Lv.1

Can try to make a monster obey one command unconditionally

Based on Soul Status

Must have 5x the amount of Soul power of target

Cooldown Time: 24 hours

‘Hurray for mind control! Too bad it sucks, hopefully it gets better when I level it up.’

Adorable Shield Max

You always have an aura of adorableness surrounding you.

Monsters much stronger than you will disregard and pity you

Will also make you look delicious to same leveled monsters

Healthy Digestion Max

Able to fully digest magical vegetation while completely absorbing there benefits and negating their imperfections

Magical vegetation will raise random stats

Unique vegetation will provide hidden bonuses

Some types of common vegetation will provide System points

Fortunate Misfortune Max

Fortune and Misfortune are one in the same with you

If life feels like it couldn’t get worse, don’t feel down, maybe lady luck is just around the corner ready to give you a kiss on the cheek!

Having the best day ever! Well be careful, because you’ll never know if a meteor is coming down to kick your teeth in.

‘I was right, the fortune skill is totally going to be a huge pain in the ass. And I guess I was also wrong; the adorable skill is also going to screw me and make me a target for monsters.’

After letting out a sigh in resignation he tried to look on the bright side of things. ‘Come on man, stop being so negative. The skills might have their drawbacks but at least the benefits look amazing, plus with the combination of the vegetarian title and healthy digestion skill I can slowly grow stronger without having to fight monsters.’

‘Alright I think I checked everything, all that’s left is to finally check out the system store. That’s what started this whole 777 chaos and forcing me to meet that immature lunatic. I don’t really care about unlimited power; I can settle for the strongest in the world. I mean how is that not enough for some people? Now let’s see what goodies we have here.

‘Alright, store open.’

Unable to open store

‘…… ok, what did that asshole do! Wait, wait it might just have just been a mistake, let’s try again, store open.’

Unable to open store

Scanning for Error…

No Error Found

Message Found…

Hello!!!

How are you enjoying your new life!!! Having fun yet!?

If your seeing this, it means you tried entering the filthy store.

But you don’t have to worry, I did you the favor of locking it and…

You won’t ever have to worry about it again!

Wow I’m such a nice guy, your so welcome!

Anyway, just say Pristine store to open the good store!

Bye! Bye!

‘FUCK! That lunatic screwed me again! I just wanted to live a good and easy life! What’s so wrong with that!’ As he was hit with a wave of depression, he just closed his eyes and let his body go limp. He lied there for a few minutes, just letting his dream of an easy life die. When he was finally done with his self-pity, he opened his eyes once more.

‘Whatever, I’m done. Let that lunatic do what he wants. I’ll just roll with the punches. I think it’s time I finally explore this new world I’m in. I’ll open the stupid store later.’

As he threw the bad thoughts to the back of his mind, he started to get exited at the thought of his first journey out of the cave.

‘ALRIGHT! Time for my first adventure! Should I give it a name? It’s my first time exploring this world, this is an important moment so I should totally give it a name. Oh, ok how about…’

‘Out of the Darkness and into the Wild; The First Great Exploration of Mr. Pine!’