Kurt tried to be thankful that his misfortune had saved a life. However, his positivity did not last long in the face of his paranoid fears. Not one of his three patients were safe. Between the excitement of their injuries and the overwhelming state of his emotions Kurt knew literally nothing about them other than their injuries. Injuries that required proper hospital care just to survive even with his first-aid care.

The abdominal wound was the most clear cut, if the person’s gut had avoided any cuts than the person might possibly survive with no real trouble. A few stitches and boom, full recovery. Kurt doubted it was truly that simple.

In reality the amputee was the worst off. Even if the person survived they would be left without a limb. Kurt knew that it was important that the arm stub receive proper care, even without a limb to save leaving a tourniquet on was bad for the patient’s health. Kurt had no idea why.

Kurt began imagining the poor man’s future when a stray thought reminded him the patient could just as easily be a woman. He tried to check her only to realise he could hardly see. A stray thought labeled his sudden blindness “tunnel vision”.

Kurt realised he was panicking. He was hyperventilating. Kurt remembered the last time his little brother had gone to the hospital. It had scared their mother so badly that she started hyperventilating. Kurt’s father had made a joke about her suffocating on too much air while Jake was getting too little.

The second time Jake was admitted to the hospital was far more difficult on their mother than the first time had been. The first time it happened they had called an ambulance and the paramedics gave him epinephrine saving his life. They took him to the hospital to keep an eye on him, just like doctors do.

The second time had been worse. They had learned that Jake was severely allergic to bees, just like they had guessed after the first incident (knowing for sure was a bittersweet relief.) The second time it happened they jabbed him with an epi-pen and thought everything was fine.

Kurt’s dad, the only member of the family who had talked to the doctors that first night was out for some reason. He was the only one who knew that Jake would need hospital care after each incident. When the epinephrine wore off and Jake’s symptoms came back…

Kurt had secretly purchased a spare epi-pen. The thought of needing one and not having it had seemed a little paranoid, but then Kurt maintained that paranoia is only unhealthy when you let it control your life.

Sometimes people are happiest when they are wrong, or at the very least never proven right. Jake lived but Kurt didn’t feel heroic. Not for saving the day by being more scared than necessary.

That second hospital visit was always a sobering memory for Kurt.