《The Fat Prince: The Orc Princess》Chapter 2: A Water Wraith

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With the sound of water rolling off in the distance, Cyrus enjoyed a peaceful sleep free of worry. When he awoke in the morning cool, he was ready to travel with his friends again. The sun light reflected in beams off dew soaked plants and bird song filled the air. Van sat on the opposite side of the stump polishing her sword and Archibald was lightly sorting out magical items from his briefcase, in which a near endless cornucopia was stored. As Cyrus sat up, Antonio dashed back to the camp in nothing but his briefs. Like the dew soaked plants, his flowing brown hair sparkled and bounced as droplets of water ran down his well chiseled pecks. He gave a prizewinning grin as he brushed his brunette hair back, pretending that Cyrus, Van and Archibald were the eyes of every yearning bachelorette on the continent. “You chicos and chicas should come down by river. It’s as beautiful and pure as an untouched maiden.”

Cyrus cringed, wishing he was still asleep, and Van rolled her eyes and muttered under her breath. Archibald gave a cawing laugh, “I think I’ll join you, prettyboy. I’m in need of some refreshment.”

The Majester loosened his black tunic, dropping it to show an equally chiseled set of tanned pecs and abs. Cyrus and Van both gasped, shocked that such a goofy jester could be in that shape.

“Uhh…uh guys,” Van said picking her jaw off the ground. “Shouldn’t we get going. This is no time for us to be swimming.”

“Who says we’re going to be swimming?” Antonio said raising and lowering his eyebrows.

Van blushed hard and swallowed harder as she looked at Cyrus. Cyrus, not wanting to see any more, just closed his eyes and calmly spoke, “I’m the leader of this mission; it’s important I know how close we are to reaching that ridge you spoke of, Archibald.”

“Relax princey poo. This river is the famous Aquarian river, and it flows from a giant waterfall at the top of the Hynnest Ridge. All that matters is getting to the top of it.”

“Aquarian…river?” Antonio said. “Mi madre told me stories about the Aquarian tribe that protects it- Magical tattoed elves who keep the very essence of water pure throughout Aristillus.”

“Correctomundo,” Archibald responded. “We’ll have to see them if we have any hopes of climbing this ridge. They know all about the land and any ins and outs that could get us to the top.”

“Ok!” Cyrus said, climbing to his feet. “That’s a lot better. I’ll get dressed and we can go.”

“But in the meantime,” Archibald said. “I’m going to work on my belly float!”

The four heroes ventured down to the riverside. The water ran in translucent blue streams that reflected the color of the sky. Across the wide river, there were dark trees dwarfing the ones from the grove they slept in. A misty aura lined the opposing forest, unwelcoming those who entered to becoming forever lost in it. On the heroes’ side of the river, a large rectangular cabin line it. A creaking wooden waterwheel spun continuously from it, and beside, it was a large fenced-in pen. Cyrus could not believe his eyes when he looked inside the pen. Small scaly green birds with yellowy eyes and beaks, claws and little red crests pecked at the feed on the ground. They looked very much like chickens that hadn’t fully evolved past their reptilian predecessors. Cyrus’ eyes sparkled as he realized he’d come face to face with his favorite animal from his biology books.

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“A liccan!” He exclaimed running over to peer through the gate and poke his fingers at one.

“What’s so important about those birds?” Van asked in her caustic accent.

“Vanessa, close your mouth!” Cyrus shouted with a finger over his mouth. “These are liccans. It’s been said that if one holds a liccan on the peak of a mountain and jumps off it, they can soar across the sky to the peak of another one.”

“Gee, I wonder who told him that?” Archibald whispered with a sly grin.

“Oh, I wonder,” Van responded with an eye roll.

Cyrus climbed up on the wiry gate, trying to avoid the barbs so he could reach in and grab a liccan by its crest. “For so long, I wanted a pet liccan. I dreamed I could use it to fly off the roof of my castle. My parents wouldn’t let me have one, but at last, my dream has been realized!”

A loud, nasally, country voice resounded from the house, “I finally gotcha, you no good liccan wrangler! It was only bout time before y’all slipped up!”

A beer-bellied, gray-haired farmer in blue suspenders stood before them. Heclutched a spear and prodded Cyrus with it, “I’m surprised such a fat guy managed to sneak past me!”

“Hey, owch!” Cyrus yelled. “You’re one to talk.”

The young prince fell off the gate and backed away. “I’m no liccan wrangler. If I need to, I’ll just have my parents buy the whole coop.”

“And who are y’all to do that?”

“I’m Prince Cyrus of the Coates Royal Family,” Cyrus said pointing at his silver circlet crown around head.

“Oh Prince,” the farmer said bowing before him. “I didn’t realize it was you. Please don’t execute me, I’m jus a humble country man.”

“You’re lucky I’m past that phase,” Cyrus said, exchanging knowing looks with Van and Archibald. “But what is this about a liccan wrangler?”

The man crouched on the ground, still bowing before Cyrus. He was dead silent and started kissing Cyrus’ toes. “Rise subject!” Cyrus exclaimed. “As much as I like this groveling, I’d prefer if you’d just tell me your name, and the reason why you’re upset.”

“Oh thank you, o’ merciful prince,” the gray-haired man said. “My name is Levon and I came here fer three things: the fresh air, to raise the liccans and to see an Aquarian babe.”

“What was the third thing?” Archibald asked with a mischievous smirk.

He winked at the man and the man gave an uneducated, gap-toothed grin. “I see yer a man of taste,” Levon said. “I just wanted to a catch a glimpse o’ those tall, tanned and tattooed beauties that are said to live down here, but I ain’t seen a single one.”

“Wait,” Antonio said leaning in towards Levon with a roused expression. “Mi madre never said anything about those elves being beautiful and tall babes.”

Van shoved him. “It was probably to keep them safe from you.”

“But,” Levon continued, “Nothing but misfortune has befallen me. Not only are these elven beauties a myth but a weird wraith has been stealing my liccans.”

Archibald looked at his younger allies. Cyrus, Van and Antonio looked back at him with knowing expressions. Cyrus cleared his throat. “A weird wraith may mean that there’s an evil presence from the shadow lands nearby..”

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Levon let out a wimper and started shivering like a startled pig. “Oh why oh why have these devil lands taken an interest in me?”

“Maybe because you’re a dirty perv who…” Van startled but was silenced by Archibald.

“Maybe it is…but…it could very much be something else,” Archibald said. “What did this liccan wrangling wraith look like it?”

Levon put his hand to his chin, trying to rack his brain to recall what he saw. “It was see through and could walk across the river. Oh and when it took my liccans, it enclosed them in bubbles and hauled them away.”

Archibald nodded. “Thank you my good man. Well, it seems clear to me that if we hang around here we might get the answers to all our problems.”

“What? How?” Van responded. “We’re just going to wait? We only have three days left to save Trinity.”

Archibald put his arm on Van’s metallic shoulder pad. “Trust me knighty. Finding this wraith will solve all our problems. And in that case…”

Archibald loosened his tunic and dropped his pants. “It’s belly floating time…We’re camping out right by the river tonight, boys and girl.”

As Archibald fell backwards onto the slow moving river, Levon stood dumbfounded. “Does he always do that?”

“It’s a pretty recent habit actually,” Cyrus said.

***

Archibald and Antonio lounged in the sunny river until evening time fell across the sky. Cyrus and Van sat by the water’s edge, watching them. Cyrus, in particular, was not a fan of swimming. He was ashamed of his body and felt particularly self conscious in front of Van and Antonio. He didn’t want the former to giggle at him and the latter to laugh at his jiggling belly. Much to his surprise, Van accompanied him and looked seriously annoyed by the nonchalant attitudes of the other men. Cyrus knew she was really furious with Antonio, who had courted her in order to trick her. He gave her an honest apology, but Cyrus understood that it wasn’t easy for her to let go of being played with emotionally. It was the thing he liked most about Van- she always stuck to her guns no matter what. If she was in love, she was truly in love and if she hated someone, you could bet she’d glare daggers hard enough to puncture her enemy.

The river shaded to gold as the sun dipped down. All of the supplies had been laid out beside the river for the party to relax. Archibald and Antonio dried themselves off. Was it now time for them to get down to business? Cyrus wondered.

“Well,” Archibald said lounging on the ground. “Today was fun but I’m tired now. Time to go to bed!”

“Are you kidding me?” Van exclaimed as Archibald closed his eyes and turned over.

Antonio neatly brushed his locks of hair, wringing them out while looking as attractive as possible with his shirt open. Van glared daggers at him and when she spoke, her voice was even sharper. “Ever since you joined us, Antonio, you’ve been a bad influence on Archibald. He was never this lazy before you came along.”

“Hey chica,” Antonio responded with his deep and disinterested voice. “Stop looking for a reason to be angry at me. I said I was sorry and vowed never to do wrong again. What more do you want from me?”

“To stop being such a bad influence!” Van exclaimed balling her fist up. “You and him are partners in crime. From your head right down to your…”

“Beautifully chiseled abdominal muscles?” Antonio interjected. “I must admit, for a clown he’s really got a body that rivals mine.”

“Stop talking about that!” Van shouted, her face turning red in the sunset. “What matters is that we’re burning days up when we should be trying to find a way to reach Trinity.”

“Again, your jester friend seems to have that covered,” Antonio worried. “I wouldn’t worry about that.”

“I just worry about you,” Van said muttering under her breath. “Come on Cyrus, let’s leave this lout. I ought to put my beard back on so he stops starring at me with those deceptive eyes.”

“Hey,” Antonio said relaxing on his hand. “They’re the only eyes I have so take em or leave em.”

“I’d rather chuck them into the deepest abyss than look at them again.” Van said and walked with Cyrus over to the chicken coop.

Cyrus had less of a problem with Antonio; he fully believed his apology but he understood, that for Van, Antonio held her heart in his hand and crushed it. She would never forgive him. The two sat and talked among themselves and Cyrus admitted, even if he wanted to save Trinity, he did enjoy this downtime.

***

When night fell, Cyrus, feeling very lazy, decided he would take a short nap. He wanted to stay up watching for the wraith with Van, but he had gone to town on Levon’s homemade grits and lemonade and was feeling a food coma coming on. He slouched over and lay on his side. He had a strong urge for his mom to rub his tummy and sing him to sleep. And just as he pictured that, he felt even sleepier and a bit homesick. He slowly drifted off with a small murmur for his mother.

Cyrus began to feel a bit watery too. He wasn’t crying and he hoped he hadn’t wet himself. He quickly opened his eyes and found that he was submerged in a bubble of water. Frantically he looked to his side and saw several liccans caught in bubbles too. He quickly swam up and poked his head out of the bubble before realizing the watery wraith figure was carrying him with its magic. “Van! Archibald!” He screamed as the figure carried him into the dark misty forest across the river.

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