《The Fat Prince: The Orc Princess》Chapter One: A Vision In The Flames

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The brightness of the day gleaming on a verdant country road could do little to alleviate the worries of Prince Cyrus Coates. He was fraught with worries over noble Princess Trinity being held hostage in a frozen dungeon up north and how he witnessed her mistreatment from her captors, the nefarious Everblood. He had to hurry to save her; for in a few days, when the red moon blistered through the sky, they would make a feast of her blood, remaining youthful for another half century.

But Cyrus wasn’t just worried for the sake of Trinity. He had fought a fierce battle against an Everblood the day before and discovered two powers within himself. He possessed the ability to perform an exorcism by merely touching a victim of possession and even more frightening, when wounded, his stomach became a demonic void that would consume anything.

Cyrus gazed at his friends and allies as they walked onward. There was Vanessa Montero, the courteous female knight, Antonio Corazon, the suave rogue and lastly, Archibald the Majester, Cyrus’ oldest friend and mentor. Cyrus had a question that had been lingering in his mind since the battle. Why did Archibald try to cover up the fact that he could purify people by merely touching them? Why would his best friend not let him know he had such a miraculous power? It puzzled the young prince’s mind, but he had no idea how he could bring it up without seeming agitated with his friend. Normally, the pampered and spoiled Cyrus wasn’t afraid to let people know when he wanted something but this was different. This was a person he cared a lot about and other than Van, his parents and Trinity, Archibald’s opinion towards him was one of the few that mattered.

Cyrus’ mind shuffled around the words he’d ask and he played them back in his head over and over. “Archibald, there’s something I’ve been meaning to ask you: did you lie to me?” No, that would be way too accusatory.

“Hey Archibald, old buddy, I was wondering if you could tell me a little about my magic and how it works?” There, that sounded better. Now he just had to make it sound very casual and relaxed. He had to sound like he didn’t have a care in the world when he said it.

Cyrus relaxed his body and tried to relieve his tensions by taking a whiff of the sweet country air. He rolled his shoulders and his neck. It was the first time he realized that the weather was beautiful. He felt a lot better and raised his hand to open his mouth.

“Hey Archibald, I was wondering if you could tell me a little about… ”

“I swear Antonio, if you look at my behind one more time I’ll cleave your neck!” Van exclaimed swinging her sword right between Cyrus and Antonio.

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“Great Wizard’s underpants!” Cyrus screamed as the sword nearly missed him.

“Oh Cyrus, I’m so sorry,” Van said, quickly holding on to a hyperventilating Cyrus. “I was aiming for that rapscallion who’s been eyeing me this whole time.”

Cyrus’ asthma only made his lungs pound harder. A concerned Archibald quickly crouched beside Cyrus. Archibald put a consoling hand on his his friend. “Hey princey poo, if it makes you feel any better I can tell ya a little about the Great Wizard’s underpants. At the Magicademy, for our senior prank, me and my buddies took his polka dotted, newt spotted undies and hoisted them up on the flag pole. As punishment, he turned us into underwear and wore us for a week. Let me tell you this, your whole perspective on life changes when you’ve been an old wizards knickerbockers…and…”

Cyrus was agitated and disgusted by his friends anecdote and screamed, “Archibald! I don’t want you to tell me about some old man’s underwear. I want to know why you were lying to me!”

Both Antonio and Van who were trading eye daggers stopped to look at Cyrus in shock. Archibald flinched himself. His playful dark eyes looked genuinely startled. “Princey, what are you talking about?”

“Why didn’t you tell me I had powers?” Cyrus said in a sudden out burst. “You gave me a cross to make me think I was using that to purify Van and Maddie when it was clear I didn’t need it. You put me in danger…”

Cyrus crossed his arms and turned away from his friend when he realized what he said. Archibald did put him in danger when Cyrus could have easily avoided being near possession victims. Archibald caught Cyrus’ eye for a second when the young prince chose to peek at his friend. Archibald spoke in a controlled, gentle but honest voice. “Cyrus, I’m a loyal servant of your parents who are paying me top gold to take care of you. What could I possibly gain from lying to you? You should know me by now, princey Poo. Have I done anything that would put you in danger?”

“Well,” Cyrus said, slightly turning his head back. “That’s uh debatable.”

Archibald raised his hands and gave an open mouth grin. “Hey, it’s the spirit of adventure, my boy.” You can’t sue the wilderness if ya get mauled by a flying wolfhound. But I want you to know I’m working overtime to keep you and your little friends safe.”

Archibald started patting Vanessa on her poofy hair. “In fact now that I know Vanessa has an Antonio allergy, I’m going to keep her far away from him so she doesn’t blow up.”

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“I’d appreciate that,” Van said, before glaring at Antonio who just raised his hands and smiled.

“And,” Archibald said. “I’ve done the same for you, princey. I gave you the transcendentity because that’s how I perform an exorcism myself. If I knew you could do it without one, I wouldn’t have given it to you.”

The Majester gave a wry smile. “In fact, this is a cause for celebration. Princey, you’ve got a future career as an exorcist after you save the princess. Your parents will be thrilled!”

Cyrus nearly forgot about his issue with Archibald because he was so excited to hear that. “They will?”

Archibald took Cyrus by the shoulder and pointed at the sky like fate had written the young prince’s name in it. “Imagine this,” he said. “Cyrus Coates, the Exorcist King. You’ll have the favor of all of Aristillus when you can purify you subjects from the reaches of the shadow lands.”

“Wow,” Cyrus exclaimed. “I never thought about that.”

The young prince put his excitement down to simmer for a mere moment of anxiety. “Just what does that stomach power have to do with it?”

Archibald put his hand to his chin. He seemed to be puzzling his brain really hard like the answer to Cyrus’ question meant a lot to him. “That I’m not sure of. I was thinking being in proximity with the devil’s gold might have caused you some kind of illness or mutation.”

“A mutation…” Cyrus said, swallowing hard.

“But,” the Majester said quickly. “Good health has smiled upon you again. It seems you are back to normal. And do you know what that calls for?”

“What?” Cyrus said, calming down from his second panic attack.

“It might be time to roast some of that mutton little Miss Jetta Larson gave us. I did promise it to you if you didn’t eat me.”

“But I did eat you,” Cyrus said pushing his hands together.

“You ate me but didn’t swallow and while I was in there I pondered the fragility of life, the longitude of death and what a cozy little belly void that was. So thank you for allowing me a new perspective on morality and you know what that calls for?”

“What?” Cyrus asked again, feeling a bit confused.

“An existential dinner of roast mutton!” the Majester exclaimed causing everyone to raise their eyebrows. “Everyone is now required to mutter about our place in the universe while enjoying delectable legs of meat.”

“Excellent, mi amigo,” Antonio said with a nod and a tilt of his conditioned head of wavy brown hair. “My place in the universe is to be a gift to all female kind.”

Van smirked and crossed her arms. “I know what Antonio’s true place in the universe is.”

“What is it, my little chica?” Antonio said, slightly hoping for a recovery.

“To shut up.”

“Ouch,” he muttered. “The cold shoulder.”

Everyone else laughed and the fear and irritation in Cyrus’ mind was soothed. The four continued until the country road lead them to a forest grove. As the sun came down and gold shaded all the trees, the sound of rushing water was nearby and provided a soothing backdrop for the team to relax. Archibald roasted the mutton on metal sticks over a crackling fire and danced as he did, shaking his rump and singing an off-key bard song. Cyrus and Van lounged on a mossy log next to each other in the dim forest ambiance, watching their friend.

Van whispered to Cyrus. “The Majester seems really animated tonight. You really got him going.”

Cyrus smiled. “Yep, he gets like this when he’s in a good mood. I feel good too.”

“He’s a little wild,” Van said rolling her eyes with a gentle smile. “But not only is he powerful, he’s a good guy. Well, except for his kleptomania, but I’m working on that.”

Cyrus nodded again fondly as the flames playfully danced in his eyes. “Yup, he’s my best friend and I’m very lucky he’s on our side.”

But as Cyrus began to watch the flames in a trance, the outside world quieted down. They rose higher and higher until he could feel the wind blow the heat towards his face like a demonic hand reaching out to grab him. He looked further beyond the twisted flame hand and saw Archibald’s face in the fire laughing his squawky laugh through the crackling. Cyrus screamed and squeezed his eyes tight.

“Cyrus what’s wrong?” Archibald and Van both exclaimed.

Cyrus opened his eyes and found himself back on the log. Archibald gave a knowing smile and thrust a steak in his face. “No need to be scared, little buddy. It’s your favorite food. I made it just for you…and these other people.”

Cyrus laughed nervously and took the plate. He wasn’t feeling hungry anymore, but he couldn’t explain why. Archibald continued to smile at him, and perhaps, that was the most unnerving thing of all. Cyrus elected to go to bed and forget all about this day. He had a princess to save after all, and that was more important than sinister visions in the fire.

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