《A Beautiful Catastrophe》Tears

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[Music Recommendation: "In Silence" by Janet Suhh (It’s Okay Not To Be Okay OST)-available in Youtube or Spotify] ~ Please listen to it in a loop while you read this part to experience the utmost beauty of this chapter ~

So it was all because of those people—and those scammers worked for them! They probably thought we were so small we wouldn’t be able to fight back so it was easy for them to bully us and do whatever they wanted! That’s why dad had no choice but to invest in that losing business that eventually caused our whole family’s finances to go down! It was all because of them!

Rage took over me. My face furrowed and my hands clenched so hard I almost cut my palms with my nails. My eyes teared up but I did my best to stop them from falling. I was so frustrated… but I needed to calm down. There was still something I’m curious about.

Given the fact about those despicable corporate giants, and our business going bankrupt… still, why? Why did dad decide to leave us back then? If we became poor, that should be fine as long as we’re together, right? We could still help each other and rebuild from scratch. He didn’t need to leave us, right?

Then, a sudden thought came to me.

“You said it will be over soon,” I said, staring at him intently. All my rage was gone, replaced with fear instead. “And you said they ‘persuaded’ you… What exactly do you mean by that?”

My dad’s eyes widened. His lips trembled, and I could see him sweating profusely. There was something else he wasn’t telling me. He didn’t think that I’d be able to understand the situation with such depth. But even if he refused to tell me, I was wise enough to guess.

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Knowing dad would comply with their requests no matter how absurd it was, there was only one thing that would put them at risk…

It was dad himself—he was the greatest risk!

If ever dad’s mind changed and wanted to deal with things legally, it would take a hit on their name being the corporate giant they were. It would be a huge scandal. With their massive connection, they would obviously win the trial but public opinion was one thing that would be hard to manipulate even if they controlled the media. There would also be a possibility of them getting investigated by the government. Once it reaches the ears of their foreign investors or their international alliances, they would then lose their credibility for being unable to clean such a simple mess, and eventually losing money and investors in the process.

Given all those facts, even if it was only a very small probability for them, as corporate giants, they wouldn’t take the unnecessary risk.

And what was the easiest way of eliminating a risk? Cutting it from its roots!

And in the case of my dad… cutting him from the world.

“Sniff… sniff… sniff…” I sobbed hard. What once were tiny tears falling from my eyes became a continuous stream.

All those years I hated my dad… because I thought the reason he left us was simply irresponsibility. But in truth, he did it to protect us. He kept everything a secret from us and went away quietly so they wouldn’t suspect us and target us. And the reason why he didn’t visit me on my deathbed was because… he was no longer there. He was already gone!

Those people silenced him!

He died all alone!

He died being hated by the family he protected!

Because no one knew what really happened!

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All because of them!

For a freaking piece of land!

F*ck them!!!

WRAAAAAAAAAAAA!!!

I wanted to scream so loud in my anger and frustration. But I’m sure my dad felt worse. I wanted to comfort him, even for a bit. With trembling hands, and tear-stained face, I inched closer to him, and gave him the warmest hug I could give. Deep inside, I wanted to make up for the times I hated him. I was so stupid! How could my trust in him be so shallow?

How did he feel during his last moments?

He must have been so lonely… or scared… devastated…

Why wouldn’t he be? We were just living so peacefully back then. But those people just came and ruined it! All for their greed! How I wish that they’d suffer instead! That they get what they deserve! That they pay for their crimes and hideous acts! Let them suffer divine retribution by a hundred fold!

“Sniff… sniff… sniff…” my dad and I cried our eyes out.

It was the first time I saw him cry. How could I have forgotten? My parents were just humans, too. They laugh, and cry, and get scared, just like any normal human. They weren’t God, they weren’t perfect. They just love… and try to do what’s best for the family.

“Dad,” I called him dearly.

“Yes?”

“I love you.”

Dad cried harder. But afterwards, he smiled and caressed the back of my head.

“I love you so much, too, my dear daughter.”

I wanted to help him—to resolve this great storm that came to our lives. This time, I didn’t want him to handle it alone. But what could I possibly do? I was just a teenager. And even if I had knowledge of my past life, none of my memories could be helpful in solving this ordeal.

An hour passed with us just crying and comforting each other. Later on, my mom and younger brother arrived so we wiped our tears and went to our rooms. We couldn’t share the truth with them. Mom’s heart was weak and my brother was too young. It was up to us to solve this issue.

Once in my room, I went straight to the bathroom and soaked myself in the bathtub. I cried a little more and prayed to God to deliver us, and show us the way…

“For us to be able to overcome the big whales… we’ll need the help of the ocean.”

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