The once hilly grasslands that rolled past outside my window had been turned into an expanse of fire and black smoke. The smoke billowed upwards, casting a dark shadow around the train.

“Mistress!”

As I stared in mute shock out the window of the train due to the dramatic and arsonistic changes in scenery, Alice burst into my train car with a panicked expression.

“Boreas is here! We need to get you to safety!”

Ah, Boreas, it should have been obvious with how everything was on fire.

Boreas was well known around the world as a destructive force. He travels across the globe leaving naught but ash in his wake. Every time he appears a country loses almost every flake of gold it has. He’s also the sole reason as to why many countries kill griffins on sight.

“Alice, grab everything of importance, then we’ll leave.”

I reached under my desk and pulled out a small duffel bag and ran over to the west wall to save as many flowers as I could. If I had time I would go over to the east wall and do the same, but the west wall takes priority.

“Mistress, we should leave now!”

“Alice! You’ll do as you’re told!”

“We could always get new documents! I have to stay with you, and if you die then I’ll be next on the chopping block!”

“Alice if you don’t start gathering documents right now then the method of your execution is the last thing you’ll be worrying about!”

Despite her protests, she ran over to my desk and pulled out a duffel bag of her own to start shoveling documents into it. She knew better than to challenge me on this.

As we tied up the duffel bags Esia burst into the car.

“Thank the gods you guys haven’t left me- I mean left yet!”

Esia was carrying the single luggage bag she brought with her.

“Esia, I recently threw Julie out of the train and pinned her to the side, I need you to go and retrieve her.”

“Wha-? Why would you do that?! She’s like four years old!”

“She made me angry. Now go and get her-”

I was cut off by the largest explosion I’ve ever felt detonating at the front of the train which caused us to lose our footing and fall to the floor.

I could feel uncontrolled weightlessness as the train ascended into the sky, with its only destination the hard ground below us.

I moved without thinking.

I cycled my magic to call on as many swords as I could and forced them outwards. They pressed against the walls of the car, stretching it, cracking the metal, until the first tore through and the others followed suit, ripping off bits of wall, making the holes bigger.

As my train car was torn apart by my swords, I leapt through one of the tears and spread my wings.. I flew as fast as I could to a safe distance away from the train where I landed and promptly collapsed due to exhaustion as I heard and felt the train land in a crushing impact where it burst into flames and shrapnel.

I sat up as I tried to pace my breathing. I never used magic that much in my last life and if I hadn’t trained with my Goddess then I wouldn’t have been able to tear open that train car to escape it. I’ll be sure to offer extra sacrifices at the next sacred feast. As I stared at the burning remains of the train, Esia landed next to me. Alone.

“Where’s Julie? I told you to go get her.”

Esia took a few talco berries out of her pocket and gave a shrug.

“I didn’t think I’d be able to pry her loose in time.”

She ate one of the berries.

“So you just left her?!”

“No. I made a snap decision and decided to throw Alice at her and hope for the best.”

Seeming unsatisfied with the berries, she put those back in her pocket and pulled out a flask and tried to drink from it. I jumped up and snatched it out of her hands. I would have stabbed it with one of my daggers if I wasn’t so tired.

“What have I told you about drinking! A griffin just tried to kill us! The griffin isn’t even gone yet and you think that NOW is a good time to start drinking!?”

I threw the flask as far as I could, dropped my duffle bag at my feet, and began walking towards the wreckage.

“Alice and Julie better be alive. If they aren’t then I’ll make sure that mercury is the last thing you drink.”

Esia didn’t say anything as she took the hint and followed behind me. We didn’t fly as I didn’t want to get the attention of Boreas, who was circling overhead. He probably would have already found us if there wasn’t so much smoke in the air.

If I return to the castle with less servants than when I left, then I’ll fucking summon my employees from my previous life, gods be damned.

There were many times since I came under the employ of the Princess where I thought I was going to die, I think this is the first time in those nine long years where I’m genuinely surprised I didn’t.

The day started like any other. The Princess was threatening people and I was regretting my life choices. Then Julie gets pinned to the side of the train, Boreas shows up and blows up the train, and I get thrown at Julie while the train is fifty feet off the ground!

What in the Gods’ name did I do in my previous life to deserve this?!

“Julie, can you please stop crying? I don’t want the griffin to know we’re here.”

I’ll admit, when I was thrown at Julie I panicked a bit and fumbled my barrier spell. I still kept us from getting squashed by the train’s burning carcass, but Julie still bumped her head and now she just won’t stop crying. To make matters worse, the sword that was pinning Julie to the train had bent at a weird angle, making it that much harder to pry her free. The smoke certainly wasn’t helping.

Oh this is terrible! If I don’t get out of here soon I’ll die of asphyxiation! But If I leave Julie then that crazy princess will kill me and turn my corpse into a throw rug! AAAAAH! WHAT DO I DO?! The smoke is making it so dark I can’t see anything! I have no idea if something is sneaking up on me or not… wait. If I can’t see… Then no one else can see… Which means I’m perfectly safe! Yeah! As long as I don’t make any noise, then Boreas won’t know I’m here! I’m definitely safe for now!

I froze as a loud crunch came from behind me and it suddenly got a lot hotter.

“What is that horrid cry?”

Juile stifled her crying as I stiffly turned around to face the thing standing atop the smoldering wreckage of the train. The creature was as big as a train car, it’s flaming claws dug into the metal it stood on, burning it with it’s touch. Wisps of flame ignited and sparked along it’s golden feathers and fur, it’s many tails glowed red hot like molten chains. It’s mouth smoking as it spoke. Boreas had just addressed us.

I really wish ‘for now’ would have lasted longer.

“So there were survivors, that's perfect.”

Boreas jumped down off of the wreck and sauntered towards us, the ground igniting where he laid his feet. I backed up into the wall Julie was pinned to as he got closer. I could hear Julie whimper every time Boreas stepped closer. At some point her hand had found its way to my leg and was gripping it so tightly you’d think she’d die if she let go.

Well, we probably will die at this rate.

“I-if you’re going to eat us could you do it quickly?”

My eyes go wide as Julie chokes that out. Is she trying to get us killed?!

“What the hell are you saying?!”

I leaned down to whisper-yell at the crying little twerp trying to get me killed.

“I’ve dealt with griffins before and let me tell you it’s better to just get eaten now rather than listen to them talk endlessly-”

“As if I would eat something as unappetizing as a sniveling human and a prepubescent elf.”

“P-prepubescent!?”

I-I may be young but I’m FAR from prepubescent! I doubt this beast knows how to spell prepubescent!

“No, I’m here for a much more noble purpose. A megear revenge if you will.”

Boreas stood over us, lowering his head to an inch from my face. I could smell my hair frying due to the proximity.

“What I require from you sniveling goats is information, and if you provide it to my satisfaction then I may find it in my heart to let you live to see tomorrow.”

Boreas brought his head back to let his declaration sink in. If-if I answer his questions, then he might not burn me alive, and he might let Julie live too so that the princess won’t burn me alive!

“What um- what do you want to know?”

“I wish to know the location of a particular human named Terry Fulcreek. He has stolen something from me and I wish to see him punished for it.”

Julie squeezed my leg tighter as Boreas said that.

Terry Fulcreek. He wants to know the location of the world's most famous DECEASED criminal to enact revenge on him. Oh no. I’m totally about to die.

The thought of lying didn’t even cross my mind as Boreas’ blazing irises seemed to bore deeply into my soul.

“...I-I hate to tell y-you this…sir, but Terry Fulcreek has been d-dead for over five years.”

Boreas narrowed his eyes, silence filling the air as the crackling flames of the burning wreck fought to make themselves known. Boreas brought his front foot up to my face, his claw burning directly beneath my chin. I had to conjure a small barrier to keep his claw from burning through my jaw. It lightly flickered due to my exhaustion.

“That's not the answer I’m looking for… but because I’m such a generous soul, I’ll let you answer one more time. Where is the human named Terry Fulcreek?”

I’ve noticed that everyone that calls themselves generous has a terrible habit of threatening people.

“A-as far as anyone knows, Terry Fulckreeek is d-dead B-BUT m-m-maybe we all just wrong and-and… and…”

My eyes swam around in a panic as I tried to think of a way out of this horrible situation. Boreas’ claw was under my chin, ready to burn through my skull. I was too tired to make any barrier capable of stopping Boreas because I had to make a barrier to save Julie and me from getting crushed by the train, I can’t really fight- even with my barriers, and Julie is pinned to the train and if I leave her then the princess will kill me.

No no no no NONONO! I can’t die now! I never got to apologize to Mom! Or Tina! Or Viessa! Or anyone! But what can I do?! Any barrier I make will shatter like when Julie shot it with her stupid little- WAIT!

My eyes snap to Julie. Immediately I see her ‘pistol’ tied to her hip. As quickly as I can, I tear the apparatus free and aim it at Boreas. Pulling the trigger, the gadget works it’s magic with a loud *CRACK* as a jagged, flickering, red bolt rocketed towards Boreas… and missed him completely.

“...”

“...”

…

“...you missed.”

“I… uh-”

“He was five feet away from you and YOU MISSED!”

“It’s my first time using this thing I’m sorry! I’ll try again!”

I raised the pistol again and pulled the trigger, but instead of firing it sparked and smoked.

“J-Julie your device isn’t working!”

“Of course it isn’t! You didn’t give it any time to cool down!”

“SILENCE!”

Boreas burst into flames, causing the air to boil around us as it couldn’t take the heat, and slammed his front foot into the ground. I’m pretty sure my maid uniform would be on fire right now if it wasn’t soaked in my sweat.

“If you desperate goats have no information on the whereabouts of that particular human, then I doubt you’d be able to answer my other question, but I suppose it wouldn’t hurt to try.”

The flaming griffin reached his claw into his feathers and pulled out a purple gem of some kind. I couldn’t really see it because of all the smoke. After gazing at it for a second, Boreas brought it closer to us so we could see it. It was certainly impressive... but it looks a lot like the gem on Her Majesty’s necklace, so it lost a lot of its luster as I was reminded of the murderous sociopath. Julie’s death grip on my leg loosened for a moment before gripping even harder.

“Now, do you know where I could procure a gem as beautiful as this one?”

Neither of us said anything in response.

“Hm, it seems that asking you worthless goats was a waste of my time.”

Boreas hid the gem back in his feathers as fire started to dribble and spill out from his beak. He brought his head back and inhaled-

His breath was cut off by a heavy steel train door flying out of the smoke and slammed into his face. The impact made a resounding *thud* sound as Boreas stumbled, the fire in his mouth wavering and dying.

“INSOLENT- WHO DARES?!”

Boreas found his footing and turned towards the direction the door came from. And, for the first time in my life, I was thankful to see my mistress.

“INSOLENT- WHO DARES?!”

I was really hoping that the door would hurt him a little bit more.

The smoke made it a little difficult to see, but the giant fireball of a griffin was easily visible enough. My new boss, the princess who kills everyone she hires, figured that the griffin was talking to someone.

I prayed that Boreas wasn’t talking to Alice or Julie. Well I say pray, but I meant I just snuck a flask out of my boot and took a drink when the psychopath wasn’t looking. I mean, what were the chances that Boreas was talking to my new coworkers? How many people were on this train? I thought it was more likely that Alice and Julie were somewhere else. Unfortunately, we saw the distinct bolt of one of Julie’s toys fly right by Boreas.

Great. Just my luck.

The princess had exhausted her magic tearing that train car apart, so she couldn’t fight and she knew it. So she just told me to do it instead.

One order to ‘save them or suffer’ later, I picked up the heaviest loose piece of train I could and threw it at Boreas.

And it did jack-diddly-squat.

“You worthless ANT! Have you no manners?!”

I don’t even see a mark on him. Maybe he’s wincing a little bit, but that’s probably just my imagination.

“No, nevermind your manners. They won’t matter once I kill you anyways.”

Fucking hell.

The flames on Boreas’ body burned bright and launched themselves towards us. I grabbed a stray hunk of metal and threw it at the flames. As it left my hands I pushed the princess behind some rubble and spread my wings and flew away, ignoring her shouts. I’ve seen Boreas fight before and being anywhere near his fire is a death sentence.

As Boreas’ bolts made contact with the metal I threw, they exploded violently, turning the hundred pound hunk of steel to a shower of molten metal. Boreas spread his wings and launched off the ground to chase me, shooting more firebolts as he did so. I was still too low to the ground to do any fancy maneuvers so I took out my flask and threw it at the bolts while flying as high as I can. The flask thing didn’t really work as only one of the bolts exploded, the rest were still racing towards me.

Fuck fuck fuck FUCK! What the hell did I get myself into?! What the hell was I thinking?! This would be so much easier if I had my sword!

Sure I couldn’t fly with the damn thing, but it’d do more damage than the door. Plus, I just threw the flask that I had bought with the money I got from selling the sword. Regardless of my seller's remorse, I needed some kind of weapon. I couldn’t just punch the giant ten thousand degree fireball, I’d lose my hands!

The firebolts were right on me, so I stopped my wings and began to fall. My head fell backwards and when the ground was in my sight I put power into my wings and threw myself into a dive rocketing past the bolts. Boreas was above me now, and no doubt launching even more firebolts at me. Each one with the power to melt my face off even before touching me, but honestly I was more concerned with the fact that I was about thirty feet off the ground and approaching it fast.

Twisting my wings as much as I could, I was able to steer myself so instead of crashing nose-first into the ground, I only skid along it, the friction causing me to lose control of my center of mass and slam into probably the only intact wall in this burning train wreck.

Fuuuuuck that hurts.

“Esia, I appreciate you distracting Boreas, but you almost crushed me just now.”

“Wha-? Oh, hey Julie.”

It seems like I crashed into the wall that the little spitball was pinned to. Alice was trying her best to pry her free, but she wasn’t getting anywhere. Looking past them, I saw the Princess running towards us, trying her best to hide in the rubble.

“Esia stop staring into space like the alcoholic you are and pull Julie free so we can get out of here!”

Right, the sooner we get Julie free, the sooner I can find a bar and drink on Alice’s money.

Using the wall as support, I shambled over and put my hand on the bent sword hilt. Putting power in my arm, I yanked it out. Well, I didn’t yank it out, the blade snapped. Doesn’t matter, Julie’s free anyways.

“Right, lets-”

*SLAM*

The air around us suddenly boiled as Boreas landed directly in front of us, cutting off our exit. Fire spilled from his beak, the fire becoming hotter and brighter as he spoke.

“That was quite a graceful landing, but as much as I would appreciate an encore, this charade has taken too much of my time.”

Fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck why does this shit always happen to me?! Did I piss Goddess Vulkira off somehow?! Pissing on her alter shouldn’t count if I’m blackout drunk!

I cannot properly tell you just how fucked we are. Forget ‘up shit creek without a paddle’, we don’t even have a god’s damn boat! I probably couldn’t kill that griffin even if I had my sword and my old squad. If Ruth was here then maybe he could do something, he always seemed happier when he was on fire. Berserkers are crazy.

Boreas breathed fire. But in that moment Alice conjured a barrier just large enough to cover us from getting burned alive. But due to her exhaustion and lack of strength compared to the griffin, the barrier quickly began to burn away to cinders

My eyes darted around while I tried to think of something, anything to save my ass. I saw the glint of the Princess’ necklace and I got an idea.

“I PROPOSE A TRADE!”

I grabbed the Princess’ necklace and tore it off her neck, snapping the clasp at the back, and presented it to Boreas from behind what was left of the paper thin barrier. He stopped trying to burn us like candles, and gazed at the necklace.

“This, em, priceless necklace in exchange for our lives.”

“GIVE THAT BACK YOU HARL-”

The Princess looked just about ready to murder me, but Julie put her hand over her mouth and whispered something in her ear. Whatever she said, it was enough to get the Princess to shut up while I saved our lives.

Boreas stepped closer to me and brought his front claw up to my face.

“That is a beautiful gem, remarkably beautiful. And that small brat’s dismay at you taking it from her makes it even more so, but I must ask...”

Boreas lightly traced my neck with his claw, drawing a few drops of blood.

“What’s to stop me taking it from you?”

I brought the necklace as close to my heart as I could.

“Because I’d bleed all over it. And that would ruin it’s luster.”

The griffin stood still for a moment, contemplating my declaration. This bastard is known for robbing people of their shinies, so I can only hope that not getting the gem dirty is worth sparing my life.

Boreas took the necklace from my hands and brought out a purple gem that looked remarkably similar. The beast smiled and put both in his feathers.

“Be grateful for I shall accept your offer.”

“AHH!”

His claw blurred and slashed my face. I fell backwards into the wall and dropped to the ground, holding my face in pain.

“If any of our paths happen to cross again, I shall not be so merciful.”

Boreas spread his wings and took off into the sky. As I watched him go I only just realized that the sun was starting to set.

“Fuck. I really need a drink.”