***

My head was ringing. It was not the curse, nor was it caused by any external source. It simply rung like a thousand cracks were ebbing around my thoughts.

It was ominous. If now was any other day, then I definitely would had done something rather than just stand frozen.

But now was not those passive days. Now, I was surrounded by corpses and my blade dripped of their blood. Now, my mind was flashing images of recent scenes. I remember every bit, the smile in my lips, the ecstasy in their fear, the hunger for more.

These were not predatory traits, just a monster's, bent for violence.

I trembled and fell on my knees. Letting go of the blade, I cradled myself with my arms. And screamed.

"Nooooooooo!!"

It was a scream of refusal, of denial. I did not just murder people. I did not just enjoyed doing so. I did not...

I don't want this. I wanted to run, but there was nowhere to go. I just wanted to live, but the whole world seemed to look down on me in fear.

Anything. I would do anything just to escape this dark storm that was driving me to insanity...

A loud boom suddenly erupted and shook the Colosseum. The radiating sun rapidly dimmed as dark clouds took over and showered rain and lightning, causing destruction in its wake.

Panic immediately ensued, and the once lively stadium became an unruly place where people raced to survival. Wealth, fame, and power became naught. Flashing golds and threats, no one cared as their mind prioritized selfish safety. People single-mindedly stampeded to any exit. Everyone did, but me.

Still kneeling, I watched true hell descending onto the city. Not caring, not scared, just watching the scene like it was someone else's business, not mine. I had more than enough hell looping in my head to worry for more..

'Do you want an end upon your suffering?'

A silent whisper was carried to my ears. I looked about, and found a figure standing hundreds of meters away. Clothed in dark robe, it glided towards me with the smoothness contradicting the turmoil of its surrounding. I couldn't discern much from the mysterious guest. Just that, it wasn't human.

Eerie, dark aura pulsated as it moved. Anything in its immediate vicinity was drained of vitality. The weapons, the corpses, the blood, all these turned to ash and mixed with the muddy ground dampened by rain.

The figure slowly crept, no feet visible under its swaying robe. The closer it got, the faster cracks seemed to spread around my thoughts. Still, I did not care.

"How?" I asked. "What can you do?" My head correspondingly had deafening shrill pitch because of the slave's curse-no questions allowed, but by this point nothing could possibly distract me from the sins I just committed.

'Not me, you. You are blessed with powers far capable than you believe. Petty ties like this-' It swung an arm sideways, and my tali disintegrated to dust. -are not even worth your attention.'

The cursed sound immediately stopped. I should had been happy, but something held me back from being so. It was the very same feeling I got in Wuen's illusion. That time, my instinct told me to stand still, this time, it told me to ran away. However, once again, my guts and brain had different opinions. My mind was enticed at what this figure had to offer.

"But, I'm still a murderer, a monster." I sobbed weakly.

'Monster... is what you would call a being beyond comprehension. That is what you are. Misunderstood. No one deserves such fate because of ignorance, much less you, who is destined for much importance. But the world is too young to accept what you are. They will not understand, and attempts would only hurt you even more. Come with me, I'll give you a place to belong. A place where you can be what you are without reserve. I'll give you a chance to prove the world what they had shunned. An existence they cannot ignore, you are not a monster they believe you are.'

It stopped exactly one meter away from where I sat. Floating above ground, only shadows colored on what should had been a face. The cloaked figure spoke the words I needed to hear, and extended an arm, reaching for me.

I was presented two choices. To live a life of hell, or join hands with the devil.

In the background, Manara, the most influential city in the continent, became a picture of apocalypse. The constant lightning strikes completely destroyed half of Hominium's audience stand, revealing the chaos dawning on the city. Inferno swallowed establishments to burning piles. Ash and smoke stubbornly rose against the thick rain pouring down in torrents. Thunders drowned all sound, but the fear in people's eyes spoke loud enough to further increase the mayhem in the beholder's mind...

Among the devastated civilization, something caught my eyes. It was a child. Wandering in the middle of the road, the boy mostly got kicked or ignored by the scrambling crowd. Still, he stood up. He guided a smaller child behind him who was bawling uncontrollably. His determined eyes and unyielding attitude made me warm inside. Against fires and confusion, he did not give in to despair, and even fought back to protect someone. He had the courage I was losing. His heroic stance reminded me of a memory I can't believe I had forgotten.

-

As the youngest, I was mostly clumsy and impulsive, which got me in trouble far more than I could deal with. However, I wasn't afraid making mistakes. I knew that my older brother would be there to guide me. I was never alone. He would reprimand my stupid decisions, would help me find a solution, would become my accomplice in some situations, or would at least listen when I reasoned. My eldest brother was my parent, my friend, and my councilor. Looking back now, he simply was my light. He always steered my to the right path. If he see me considering to join a gang, quite similar to my choices right now, he'd probably ban me from internet until I get married. In my previous life, that was like a life-long imprisonment. He was that strict, but it was all the encouragement to make the right choice.

-

Reminded of him, I made up my mind. I faced the devil, and smiled. "I refuse."

'...' If the shadows could frown, then this figure's face must be making that expression.'You choose to live a life dampened by others? You are far greater than this. They will never understand.'

"I don't know where your high expectations came from, but I don't want to regret not trying. I've had a taste of that, and it was the worse. I will not relive it again."

'...And what of your base desire? You seek carnage more than anything. The recent bloodbath was proof enough. Staying with these fools any longer would just increase the toll of deaths. You will kill again, and the cycle of blood and penance would have no end.'

What it said was true. In fact, my head was still reeling with pictures of death. The memory tore my conscience. It was painful. However, I refuse to ran away. I swore to always face reality, even if that reality was my bloodstained hands. It was was unpleasant, but just because I am miserable now did not mean the rest of my life would be the same way. I wanted to believe there would be someone who can help me, like my older brother once did, or that brave boy to another. Despite all the wrongs in my life, I wanted to believe that there was still hope for me. I know there is, moving on from horrible past taught me that reality was unpredictable because nothing is impossible. So, definitely, if it could get worse, then it could also get better. The solution is out there somewhere. Happiness is an achievable dream. I will live with that hope at heart.

I stood up and looked squarely at the figure. "Still, I refuse. Besides, who are you anyway?"

'...Child, you called me here and I would not go empty handed.' It tried to get closer, but was stopped by an invisible barrier. The figure roared and struck the barrier with a deafening blow. The barrier cracked, and I finally noticed the other countless cracks that had been ebbing in my mind this last whole while. 'Pay the price, of value beyond measure in asking death for solace.'

I paled and backed away. The invisible barrier that kept me away from the ominous figure looked so fragile against the swirling mass of darkness pouring out of it. Shadows probed, inching its way in through the gaps made from the cracks. I could feel danger emanating from it.

I thought hard. What do I have that can be considered valuable? My possessions were just blood soaked cloak and a pair of sandals I amateurly made from whatever materials I found in the forest.

"Teresa!"

A familiar voice. I turned and saw Pina, the bubbly noble lady that fed me and delivered me to the Colosseum. She now looked haggard with her tattered blue dress and bare feet, and her face screamed panic.

"Milady, we have to go." A man in full armor held her in place. It was the quiet guard that watched me in silence throughout the ride to Hominium.

She struggled against his grip and shouted, "Then, take her with us!"

"Milady..."

"Go." I said. "I still have business to do."

"What could- Doesn't matter, come!" She held out her hand. It was stained with dirt and mud. Slight cuts were minutely bleeding from her thumb. Her once flawless skin became just a memory. Still, her outstretched hand was achingly beautiful.

Can I accept?

But I was a jinn... Even if I could somehow contain my nature, my golden eyes would not spare us from trouble. I would burden her. I don't want that.

Then an idea came to mind. Paying the price just to drive this figure away, I had decided what to give, what to lose.

My shoulders sagged as I longingly looked at the sky. I wish there was more to it up there than dark clouds and flashes of lightning. At the very least, I want to see a sea of stars. Those were my favorite. It was nostalgic. Even worlds apart, the night sky was mesmerizing all the same with glittering diamonds scattered across, teasingly beautiful but beyond reach. I remember being stubborn. I insisted that I would land on one of those diamonds someday, where no one ever ventured on before. I will be an astronaut, travel the universe, leave my footprints, and engrave my name on the first big stone I'd find! It was a silly childhood dream.

Really, it felt nostalgic.

I faced the dark figure. Contrary to my first impression, it was neither eerie nor ominous. It was just dark, empty. "Take my eyes."

'...Acceptable.'

Shadows crept to my face and covered my vision. Pina's aghast and tearful face was the last sight I saw. I smiled at her, trying to placate her worries. Though I doubt my smile was convincing. I must had looked pitiful.

Because, I was crying.

---

The pandemonium in the city continued even after I lost my all vision. Pina, who I later learned as Lady Pinara La Areintol, took me under her care and we escaped to west via teleportation.

Months after, we found out that unidentified beings began to spawn at that city's surrounding. Manara, the city once called the den of dreams became a den of monsters . It was rumored that these monsters had golden eyes, but no one really lived after meeting them without going mad. Survivors would shake in remembrance and mutter incorrigible words, words that were immediately dismissed as a madman's whispers. Ironically, these words were the only clue of what happened in the following year.

In no time, the southern continent became a territory of these unidentified creatures. The world did not watch in silence. Armies were hastily assembled and was dispatched to the shrouded south, where the tropical climate permanently froze into eternal maelstrom. And none came back. Every scouts sent did not return. It was like the south became a bottomless void, encased in mystery. The rest of the world became wary, but the south made no further move than contain itself in silence.

In that one year, all southern nations became history. Many died, and many more drowned in despair. I was among the lucky ones. Protected by Pina, I came to live a life I had always wanted. There was roof over my head, food came in platter, clothes were fine and comfortable, I even got enrolled to a school despite being blind.

But there was something occasionally nagging mind. I had missed something.

It won't be years before my neglect came biting back at me. I should've questioned the series of coincidence that day, both good and bad. I should've doubted my easy escape. I should've tried to find answers in about just everything. What made me kill thousands in cold blood? What was that barrier around me? What was that foreign, but ominous cracking sound I kept hearing? Why did everything became chaotic to start with? Why then and there? Where did Wuen disappear to? Who was that dark figure? Did that little boy survive?

However, I didn't clarify anything. My mind and body was in the verge of breaking. I was tired of second-guessing, of gambling, of worrying, of always trying to swim up from my despair.

Right then, Pina offered the hope I badly needed. She lit my way. I accepted her hands, and I know, no matter how many times I repeat that scene, I chose wisely.

For now, I forget the complexities. With Pina legally becoming my sister -she forced her parents to adopt me, I became part of the nobilities and started a new beginning.

***

AN:

And that is the end of volume one. A bit short for one volume, but I'll make it up for the next.

For next chap, just give me a bit more time. I had to plot it first, before fleshing it out so... yeah.

Well, hope you like this one!

Just say in comments for areas I needed to improve and so on. I'm open for criticism.

(English is my second language, so there are a lot to work on. Plus, some of the diction might have sounded a little too old school? Courtesy to thesaurus.com lol)

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