《The Adventures of Nick Cage》Book 1: Chapter 5: What Is In My Pocket?

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Author's Corner: This chapter marks the halfway point of the arc and starts to show how really crazy this alternate universe really is!

Legend

" " = people talking

italics = people thinking

* * = sounds

' ' = people talking within telepathy

CAPS = Power usage

Book 1: Chapter 5: What Is In My Pocket?

Ahh, after long last I will finally be able to use one of my greatest inventions! I dub thee Le Lightsabre de Argent! After all, I didn’t JUST spend 3 days making a suit for my wife, I made many other things including this plasma blade that emits liquid silver aka lightsaber! –Nick

“Nick he’s all yours. I really hope you have to way to put down this mangy wolf, we probably only have 30 minutes left at this time.” –Mr. Absolute

*SNAP* *HISS*

“I have a thing or two to try before the time is up.” –Nick

Unfortunately things never seem to go Nick’s way as of late. Come to find out this wolf isn’t even slightly allergic to the silver making the blade useless and any wound it did cause was instantly healed. To make matters worse, it took three solid minutes just to cut off one finger which then grew back in less than 30 seconds!

Before anyone knew it, Ted woke up and started to laugh.

“HAHAHAHAHAHA, you think this can stop me?” –Ted

“Well considering this containment movement disables all lateral movement, and the fact that you can’t fly… Yes I think it will hold you for a little bit.” –Porter

Before Nick even had a chance to curse or warn anyone he sees Ted focus on the ring on his finger and a device comes out. Before anyone else even notices a thing another one of those pesky EMPs go off causing the containment unit to turn off. But before anyone could even comment or scream Ted takes another device out and promptly disappears, but not before Nick got a good look at both devices showing a mortified look on his face.

“Honey what’s wrong? You look like you have seen a ghost.” –Solaria

“Magic…” –Nick

“WHAT?” –Mr. Absolute

“His ring, the EMP, the teleportation device, they are all magic devices one might find in a xianxia novel. His ring is an interspatial ring, the EMP was just a magic device that sent a surge of magic that interfered directly with all electronics. It isn’t even a real EMP… And worst but not least, the teleport talisman is very high class magic that seems to be keyed to a specific location. This is very bad news! Werewolves and Vampires cannot create such things!” –Nick

“Well, nothing we can do about that now, Ted will show up again and next time we will just have an even better plan to defeat him!” –Mr. Absolute

“Also you and me have some things to take care of that take priority!” –Solaria

And with that, before Nick could muse on any topic, let alone come up with a solution, Solaria grabs him and rushes to their room to start their “honeymoon” or at the very least consummate the marriage. It seemed almost magical how in sync the two were. Like something was forcing him to consummate their marriage and it was out of their free will. This unfortunately led to extremely boring sex in the missionary position that lasted just long enough to be called sex and nothing more. With that they both fell asleep, or would have if Nick’s other half of his mind didn’t wake him up causing him to wonder what really was going on.

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At this moment Nick stands up and remembers the shiny thing he picked up from the ashes of Vlad and put in his pocket.

What is in my pocket? –Nick

Putting his hand in his pocket he pulls out a shiny ring and has an epiphany!

This is just like Ted’s ring! Maybe I can use this to get some answers! –Nick

Trying to find a finger to put the ring on he notices it only fits on his ring finger. Fortunately he has two of them so he sticks it on his right hand and attunes the ring to him with his Aura. And just like in one of those xianxia novels he sees the ring glow and bind itself to his finger allowing him to see the void in which he could store objects. But unlike those novels the ring wasn’t just an interspatial ring as he could feel the pull of a twin somewhere to the south. Ignoring the pull for now he searches the ring for one of the magic talismans that let Ted teleport away to see if he can’t figure out how it works and reproduce it with Aura. And like an idiot he put his aura into the talisman causing him to gain excitement since he felt he could reproduce this feeling and then despair and he realized he just activated the device causing him to teleport into the unknown.

Looking around at his new surroundings Nick finds himself in a pitch black room with a bed that just so happens to be occupied. He also notices that the occupant has a ring similar to his that is glowing in a similar fashion to his. If not for the darkness he probably would not have noticed the glow since the occupant is a young girl that looks about 18 and is simply drop dead gorgeous.

*GASP* *DOKI* *DOKI*

Whether the gasp or the loud heartbeats the girl on the bed wakes up and takes one look at the intruder then at herself, then with a blush tries to hide her body under the covers.

“Wh wh who who who are you?” –Unknown girl

“Hi, my name is Nick, and what might this beauties name be?” –Nick

Curse working in full swing Nick goes on auto-pilot as usual.

“M m m m ma My name is Maya.” –Maya

“So my dear Maya maybe you can answer some questions. After killing Vlad and taking his ring I ended up here. But why here? And where is here?” –Nick

“I can’t say where here is because She would be mad. But did you really kill the monster?” –Maya

“Yes.” –Nick

It seems cursed Nick has even more confidence than regular Nick (if that is possible) as he didn’t even deny or defer the fact that he killed Vlad. It was as if something was making sure that Maya knew he was 100% responsible.

*SQUEAL*

“My savior!” –Maya

And with that Maya throws off the covers and jumps into Nicks arms hugging him tightly. This caused Nick to get a full few of the goddess known as Maya. Skin so pale it almost has a hint of blue in the darkness, hair a shiny platinum silver with eyes as red as… well Vlad’s! This only caused a moment of pause as he noticed enormous D cups on a 5”0’ frame exaggerating her form even more.

“Yay! Not only is the curse leaving me asleep broken but you are wearing the other of the two rings meaning you are destined to be my mate for life!” –Maya

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“Yes we must finish the mating ritual right away and become a pair!” –Nick

Wait what the fuck did I just say? Ahh fuck not again! –Nick

Even if he wanted to he wouldn’t be able to resist the smile this little girl was currently giving off. With a bestial roar he rips off the thin negligee that Maya is wearing and tosses her back on the bed so he can release the beast. With a mental command his beast is released and is primed and ready. Not able to control himself he forgets the thing called foreplay and pounces on her naked form shoving his length into her without pause or abandon.

*SQUEAL*

Ignoring all sound and the little blood that was caused by his intrusion, Nick continues to thrust deep and fast giving no quarter at all!

“Ahhhhhhh nnnnn ahhhhhhhhh! HARDER HARDER GIVE IT TO ME HARDER!!!!!!” –Maya

Hearing the approval the beast is satisfied with a job well done finally releasing his pent up load into her over and over until overflow.

“Now we are one. The ritual is done” –Nick

“What do you mean?” –Maya

At this point Maya finally realizes the glow on the two rings finally subsiding meaning that the ritual is indeed done. Of course this leaves her confused.

“How did you know that is all that was needed to finish the ritual?” –Maya

“Fuck! Stupid curse! If you must know, I am cursed and that is how I knew. If you want to know more about it feel free to ask my mother or my other wife when you meet them.” –Nick

“What what what! What do you mean other wife? I’m your soulmate, the rings do not lie!” –Maya

“This is true, but my other wife is also my soulmate and there will most likely be more in the future. This is my curse!” –Nick

“Well this is fine, if you are strong enough to kill Vlad then you are worthy of multiple wives so I will not interfere.” –Maya

“Okay now that the formalities are over with I have a few questions. First, what are you? You look like a type of vampire which is obvious but you don’t look enough like Vlad to be whatever he is.” –Nick

“That’s because I’m the last Noble Vampire. I am still alive and was born unlike Vlad who was turned 3000 years ago or so becoming a master vampire the good old fashioned way.” –Maya

“So what does this mean? Why were you trapped here?” –Nick

“Oh I was only trapped for 6 months as Vlad had this stupid idea of taking over the world and used the help of that magic bitch who by the way is always lurking nearby. Of course I refused and got trapped here until the plan was completed. That magic bitch, aka Ruby the Witch told me that I would be woken up by the one that would be my husband and to not worry as Vlad’s time in this world was short.” –Maya

“But how did she know Vlad would die and that the one who saved her would be compatible to be your husband?” –Nick

“She didn’t, she can’t see the future after all. She just said some nonsense to make me feel better. But I knew the truth, she was just setting up an elaborate plan to kill off Vlad and Ted, thought I’m not sure why. You will have to ask her once she shows herself.” –Maya

“Wait, before that you said Witch. Is Ruby immortal and is she attractive?” –Nick

“Yes to both, she is the strongest Witch after all, once their magic power reaches a certain level they become immortal.” –Maya

“Okay no time to explain, I must get out of here before she shows up! Is there an exit to this place?” –Nick

“Well yes but we are hidden in the Bermuda Triangle where only magic exists and no technology. You have to pass a magical test to get out of here.” –Maya

“Okay, and can you get out yourself once I leave? It may be best for you to go meet my wife Solaria at the Halls of Justice…” –Nick

“Yes, Ruby can get me out of here now that the curse is broken. But be careful of her plans, I’m not the only one in this position nor is all what it seems.” –Maya

And after that cryptic response Nick quickly cleaned himself up and left the bedroom looking for the exit/trial grounds. Seeing the ominous temple in the foreground Nick rushes towards it thinking it must be the trial grounds and the way to the exit. Of course if he was thinking clearly he would have done no such thing, but his fear of meeting Ruby and adding to his harem was too great to allow rational thought.

Walking through the door of the temple Nick notices the design and realizes two things about this temple. It predated human history and was created by someone so powerful that they made the word immortal seem like a bunch of kittens with just long life. If he was thinking clearly he would instantly recognize where he has seen something like this before. Unfortunately his mind is still rushing him to get through it so he ignores everything even the ominous feelings around him. At the end of the walkway he sees a door and before he can go to open it he hears a loud noise in his head.

HERE LIES THE TRIALS OF THE UNKNOWN

PASSING THESE WILL CAUSE GREAT CHANGE

ENTER AT NOT JUST YOUR OWN RISK

BUT AT THE RISK OF ALL YOU HOLD DEAR!

“Fine fine whatever. Just show me the test so I can get out of here!” –Nick

SINCE YOU ARE IMPATIENT YOU GET TO

SKIP ALL THE TRIALS THAT WOULD MAKE

YOU STRONGER AND NOW MUST SIMPLY

PROVE THAT YOU ARE AT THE PEAK OF

THE FIRST STAGE OF EVOLUTION!

“Pfft, I fear nothing. I don’t need your silly trials to prove my strength, I am the great Nick Cage, future ruling of ALL!” –Nick

With that said the opens and inside is just a pedestal with an Orb at the top which caused Nick to laugh since he recognizes the orb. It is an Aura orb, it simply reads Aura levels from 1.0-5.0 which means this test was given by the same ancients that left the monument on the moon that started this whole thing. Nick never backing down from a fight walks up to the orb and pushes a full 5.0 Aura into the orb. It wasn’t until he did it that he remembered what happened on the moon and what the first message signified… Oh well, he feels he is the best and can simply overcome whatever is in front of him.

CONGRATULATIONS FOR STEPPING INTO THE UNKNOWN

KNOW THAT THE END IS NEAR AND IT IS ALL THANKS TO YOU

“What! I passed your test, am I not worthy? Wait… isn’t this supposed to be the exit? Fuck!!!!!!” –Nick

YES YOU SHOWED THAT YOU ARE WORTHY

AND NOW THE TRUE TEST BEGINS FOR ALL

AND FAILURE MEANS THE END OF ALL

And for the second time in recorded history a message once again went to every mind on the planet known was Earth.

CONGRATULATIONS FOR REACHING THE PEAK OF THE FIRST STAGE OF EVOLUTION

COMMENCING ONE YEAR TIMER UNTIL THE END

FIRST STAGE OF EVOLUTION COMPLETE!

SECOND STAGE MUST BE DONE WITHOUT HELP OR THE END WILL COME!

After this message the tower turns into a monument with the above words printed on it and a timer counting down from one year. Nick and everyone else also noticed the timer at the corner of their vision meaning it is impossible to escape their fate even if they want to forget the message.

With a burst of anger Nick does something he has yet to do. He turns his suit on for real causing his Aura to surge up to 10.0. He thing looks upward and flies straight into the magical dome keeping him stuck inside and without even a hitch he blasts through it and keeps going straight up. In little time he breaks the Earth’s atmosphere and flies straight towards the moon. Once there he searches for the first monument, once there he sees the thing he fears most. The exact same message with the exact same countdown!

Not knowing what to do Nick simply sits down on the moon and starts to meditate. As all his knowledge comes to bear he realizes that the reason his Aura feels stuck in a not is because he is stuck at a bottleneck and if he were to pass it he would be able to achieve a 6.0 or higher Aura which may be the answer to his problems. Since the test only tested his Aura then his Aura must be the key to the evolution. Glad he now has a goal if not a plan he starts to fly back home, only now at a 4.0 Aura level as he is still in hiding of course. Of course Aura power is exponential meaning 4.0 is extremely weak meaning it will be a long while before he gets home.

While Nick is stuck flying slowly from the moon, a certain Witch is screaming at a certain vampire.

“What do you mean he is gone! The temple was supposed to trap him in case he tried to run away from me! He is supposed to be mine! The curse will make sure of it!” –Ruby

“But what about the message?” –Maya

“I’m not worried about that, our beloved will easily pass this one year test, but who knew he was hiding his strength? His profile only says he has a 4.0 Aura… Curious that since he clearly did not go through the trials as it would have taken years to finish them all…” –Ruby

“Well that’s not important right now, I need to go to New York so send me there already!” –Maya

“Fine, but once this mess is all over I’m going to find him and make him mine!” –Ruby

Phew! Stupid bitch always getting into business that has nothing to do with her. I’ll be sure to keep Nick away but now it’s time to go see my new home! –Maya

Eventually Maya finds the entrance to the Hall and goes to the front desk to check in.

“Hey, I’m here to see Solaria!” –Maya

“Name please.” –Front Computer (receptionists are so alternate universe)

“Maya Cage!” –Maya

“Seems you are already in the system, go on up.” –Front Computer

Confused for just a second, Maya ignores the fact that there really wasn’t any chance for her to be added so fast to the system and simply goes to the elevator to find Solaria. Finally she comes to the common room and sees four supers sitting around a table in a heated discussion.

“What do you mean he simply wasn’t there when you woke up! It’s supposed to be your honeymoon!” –Mr. Absolute

“Well we were having sex, then I feel asleep and when I woke up he was gone. Oddly our door was still shut and locked and clearly no one had left the room so I dunno where he is!” –Solaria

“Hey guys! You must be Solaria, I’ve heard so much about you!” –Maya

“Huh? Who are you, and what do you mean heard so much about me? And better question, why is a vampire in the Hall?” –Solaria

“Oh, I’m your sister Maya, Nick has told me all about you!” –Maya

“Sister? What do you mean? And where is Nick?” –Solaria

*CRUNCH* *CRUNCH*

“Psst, pass me some popcorn brother.” –Porter

“Oh I’m Nick’s second wife and I’m a Noble Vampire. He said to call you sister. Oh and I don’t know where he is, he was running away from a witch last I checked, I figure he will show up here eventually.” –Maya

*FEINT*

This news simply caused Solaria to feint and Barb to blush. Of course Mr. Absolute was nice today and brought two lawn chairs and extra popcorn so Porter could join in. Definitely worth it!

Meanwhile in space…

‘Fufufufufufufu.’ –Sally

‘Wait, what did you do Sally?!?’ –Nick

‘Oh nothing much, I just made sure our new mommy had access to your home like any good daughter would.’ –Sally

‘Wait what? Oh I guess that’s okay, it’s just creepy when you laugh in my ear without prior knowledge, especially since that means you saw everything… *SIGH*’ –Nick

‘Oh but I always see everything, as I’m always here…’ –Sally

And with that Nick shudders while he slowly flies back to New York.

___

First chapter of the day, trying to get three out today

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