The scent of grass freshly stained by dew. A brilliant tapestry of lavender and orange above me, as the sun and moon paint the sky with the symphony of their conflict, as darkest night yields to brightest day. Footsteps to my right, I turn my head, dandelion petals gently caress my cheeks as I look upwards.

“Enjoying yourself in my territory, little goddess?” It’s been so long since I’ve seen her, even in here her face is enshrouded by the mists of lost memory. Yet, I remember her voice as clearly as ever.

I felt myself speak, my words tinged with shame at having been found.

“Oh no, please don’t apologize. I don’t mind. Anyone who can appreciate the simple beauties of the dawn is welcome to stay, as far as I’m concerned.” she said as she laid down next to me.

No words needed to be spoken. Time stood still on that grassy hill. The crisp spring wind sang a gentle melody of rustled grass. An elegy for the defeated night, a hymn for the triumphant day. Under the fading stars, our silence seemed almost sacred, to speak would have caused this moment to disappear forever. But I had to, it was only polite after all.

“My name?” the woman’s smile softened. She looked far off into the horizon, gazing wistfully at the morning star.

“Just call me Astair. Everyone else does.”

My eyes shot wide open. A dream. My cheeks were wet and my chest felt heavy. Or maybe a nightmare.

I stood up, and immediately fell back to the ground as my legs instantly gave out. Each and every muscle in my body was simultaneously on fire and frozen solid. I’d say I was experiencing horrendous amounts of pain, but that would’ve been inaccurate. Everything was pain, the me part of that equation had become almost nonexistent. On the bright side, me being in agony meant that there was still a me to be agonized. Against all rhyme and reason, I’d somehow managed to survive.

“Ha…haha…haha-! Oh it hurts to laugh…” I said. I sank down into the ground, took it all in. I’m still alive. I’m still breathing. Even after I had a messenger sent after me, I was still living.

“Ha! Send all the messengers you want, El! Maybe some them might slow me down!” I said. My battered bones might have made that seem like a lie, but I just survived falling of an airplane, after nearly getting the full power of a messenger’s soul.

At this moment, when I could barely move and my body felt like it was one giant bruise, I truly felt like the Moon Indomitable. No one could stop me from seeing this journey through. This journey…

“Hold on…” I looked around and saw nothing but lush greenery. Trees towered over me, they would have blotted out the sunlight completely had there not been a giant hole in the canopy. A hole that, judging by the broken branches and still burning leaves surrounding me, I must have made when I landed here, along with the crater that I was currently in. Unseen insects filled the air with their cacophonous buzzing, with none of the sounds of the city that usually drowned them out.

“I don’t think this is Rio…”

*

The sun was setting on the horizon when I was finally healed enough to stand. First things first, I looked at my backpack, checked its contents. Miraculously, they were still intact. Slight scuffing being the only proof that my backpack had borne the force of an explosion that could level cities. I pressed the power button, the silvery glow of my laptop’s screen a beacon in this swiftly darkening forest. They were both unscathed. Even my camera was still working. The benefits of sanctifying my equipment, even if the blessing was done haphazardly. That was good news, at least.

The problem I now had was everything else. I was nowhere near Rio, and, I had no idea where I was. Though, by the untamed wilderness before me, the humidity so thick it felt almost smothering, and the constant presence of dark clouds threatening to burst with rain, it would be safe to assume that I’d landed somewhere in the Amazon rainforest. Which wasn’t too bad, it was where I was planning on going after I’d touched down in Rio, but I’d expected to come here fully prepared, with perhaps a guide, or several. As it stands, I didn’t even have a map.

There was also the matter that, if I was correct and this was the Amazon, I’d just withstood an explosion that was powerful enough to launch me several thousand kilometres away. Coupled with sanctifying three items to regalia levels and using the Thoughtstream to call upon my connection to the moon, and I’d be surprised if I hadn’t blown through a substantial amount of the faith last night. I looked deep within me, and felt what was once the roaring blaze in my anima dwindle to small bonfire. 800 years wiped in an instant. And I was just one night in.

I was alone, exhausted, nearly powerless and completely lost. To make matters worse, I swear I could feel unseen eyes watching my every move. This seemed almost hopeless, an insurmountable obstacle presented itself before me. And it wasn’t even the first. This must have been what Junogloris felt like, when he undertook the twelve labours that would immortalize his name. Here’s hoping that mine are not as numerous as his.

The sky rumbled, and I felt the first few drops of rain fall on my head. I could think about my next move later. For now I had to find shelter.

*

The roar of thunder robbed the night of its peace. Rain fell with such strength as if to beat the forest into submission, and the whirling winds stole warmth from wherever it touched. The cave that I’d made my sanctuary served to be anything but. The mildew covered stone could do nothing to protect me from the storm’s chilling touch, and the odour of rotting flesh and excreta emanating from deeper within seemed to me a punishment for disturbing these rocks’ thousand years of solitude. I looked at the pile of wood that I’d gathered, too wet to start a fire without resorting to my faith, and I could not afford to spend it on such frivolity. All in all, this was a pretty miserable night, and it was about to get worse.

“All right, let’s get this over with…” I said, as I set up the twigs and branches as a makeshift tripod. I placed my camera on that shaky pyramid of wood, and pressed record.

“Hello my lovely citizens and plebs, to day one of LadyAstair’s Travel Vlog!” I said. I could feel my smile straining as I noticed that my voice had taken on a slightly manic edge. “Now you might be asking yourselves, ‘What is LadyAstair doing inside a cave?’ Good question!” Lightning cracked, turning the darkness within the cave into blinding light, which hopefully hid whatever demented expression I had on. Hopefully…

“You see, it all started when I looked at my finances and realized something. Namely, that, after flying here to Brazil, I didn’t have enough money to go on any of the guided tours. No offence to you, my lovely citizens, but streaming doesn’t bring in that much money.” Unless you’re Matsuri-hime. “But then I started asking myself, ‘is taking a guided tour really the best way to experience the Amazon?’ I say nay! And not just because I couldn’t afford to otherwise!” I took on the most inspiring pose I could muster while shivering inside this gods forsaken cave. “Note to self, put inspiring music here. Also, edit this out.”

“So, I decided to just jump right in. Carpe diem as they say. By the way, guess which idiot didn’t know that the ‘rain’ part in ‘rainforest’ wasn’t metaphorical? That’s right-!” The untamed wind gusted into my cave, bringing with it drops of rain, which then proceeded to utterly soak me. “-this idiot right here!”

“Long story short, I’ll have to take shelter in here for… well,” I looked outside, the unending sheets of rain was an impenetrable curtain, “the foreseeable future, it seems. Great.”

“’Well anyway, this’ll surely be all worth it; a once in a lifetime, utterly unique experience. One that you guys will get to share with me. Who knows what tomorrow will bring? Anywho, this was just a quick little status update, kind of setting the stage if you will, the rest of this vlog will have more stuff happening in it, I promise. Ciao for now!” I turned off the camera, and immediately collapsed, into the cold, unfeeling rock. All I could hear was the storm. All I could feel was the cold as my wet clothes clung to my skin, leeching any warmth that I might have had.

“Who knows what tomorrow will bring, hah! What nonsense.” I said to no one in particular, as I laid there in the dark, shivering, wet, and alone. Tomorrow brings nothing but a slow march to an undignified end. And it will continue to do so until I find what I need.

There would be time to plan. For now, I needed to rest. Beset on all sides by the uncaring elements, far from any place I could call home, I closed my eyes, and let the darkness take me.

*

It was the smells that stayed with you, long after it was over. The heat of the blasted lands might scorch your skin for minutes, and the sight of your comrades’ broken bodies might haunt you for decades. But it was the stench of blood stained metal, of the indignity of bowels moved by fear, the distinctive scent of burning flesh and bone that clung to your soul, buried itself deep, and never let you go.

I crawled forward, exposed bones scrape across the dirt of the battlefield, I felt the golden arrows dig themselves deeper into my back as I moved. Inch by bloody inch I dragged myself forward. I needed to. I had to.

The faint aroma of an early spring morning was gone. Only blood and iron remained.

I tried to speak, but my words were drowned by blood. I tried to reach out, but my arms were too burdened by the weight of my failure.

A finger to my lips, and she spoke.

Her words echoed within me. Damning me forever more.

*

I woke with a start, nearly hitting my head on the cave wall. The sun was shining, and the fresh scent of the forest after rain drifted pleasantly throughout, suppressing even the vile odour that came from deeper within the cave. It was a scene straight out of a travel commercial, (a classy one, not one of Hydrargyrus’s), a picture perfect representation of serenity. Why, then, did I feel so damn miserable? Why now, of all times, am I remembering that thrice damned battlefield?

I shook my head, forcefully clearing my thoughts even as the morning sun’s rays gently cascaded throughout my cave’s walls. Dwelling on the past would do me no good; not now, not ever.

I needed to collect my thoughts, find a path to victory, or at least the first steps towards it. The only resources I have are my backpack, my laptop, my camera, and my phone. Most of which have lost much of their utility, with me being in the middle of a forest with neither electricity nor a phone signal. I could try to go into the Thoughtstream once more, but that would cause me to hemorrhage faith, even if I were to limit my search to just within this forest. Not to mention that doing so would be like placing a gigantic, blazing flare, revealing where I was to everyone who could sense aura within a radius of at least several kilometres. The eyes that I felt on me yesterday may be gone, but something tells me that they’re simply hiding, waiting for me to reveal myself.

If only there was a way to have another source of faith at my disposal. A source of faith that would mask my aura’s signature, it’s distinctive feel. It didn’t even need to last that long, just three seconds would be enough. But, short of Vanafreya magically descending from the sky, I didn’t have anything so convenient. Or did I?

I heard the forest erupt to life, the various calls of its inhabitants filling the air in a cacophonous symphony. An idea slowly formed in my head. It was a long shot, but it might work. I gathered my still moist sticks, put them in my backpack, and set off towards the forest.

*

“Day two of LadyAstair’s travel vlog.” I said in a low whisper as I silently crept within the shadows. “Storm’s over, and now we can see rainforest in all its glory. Isn’t it beautiful, you guys? With all of the… greenery?” I mentally kicked myself at that. Whatever, I’ll just add flashy graphics and obnoxious music over it or something. Maybe a few jump cuts for effect.

I held the camera in my hand, surveying lake in front of me, its crystal clear surface sparkling in the midday sun. “Nature’s so great, you guys. You really have to experience it for yourself, really makes sleeping in a cave completely worth.” I nearly laughed at that.

I used the zoom function on my camera, looking for any signs of my quarry. A faint rustling, then a flash of brown. Found you.

“Well that’s about it for today, my lovely citizens. Wouldn’t want to disturb the animals. Ciao.” I quickly closed my video camera as a wild boar approached the lake. Its fur bristled, and it looked in my direction. Seconds passed, the boar’s breathing was all I could hear, its razor sharp tusks moving with each heavy snort. Finally, it lowered its head and proceeded to drink.

With its guard down, I struck.

I took the camera in my hand and threw it as hard as I could. It sailed in a graceful arc towards my quarry, and struck the boar with enough force to send it flying. The boar struggled to get to its feet, to fight back, but I was quicker. Before it could recover, I was already on top of it, and, with laptop in hand, I began to rain blows on it. Squeals intermingled with the fleshy thwacks of faith reinforced plastic repeatedly hitting its skull. The iron scent of blood assaulted my nostrils, its thrashing legs eventually grew limp, and the boar’s head fell to its side, eyes dull, unseeing.

I dragged the corpse to my former hiding place. If I had enhanced my strength, I could’ve given the boar a merciful death, but that would’ve defeated the purpose of this whole exercise.

“Be at peace, boar. Though your passing was marred by cruelty,it was for a higher purpose.” I told its corpse. I dropped it right next to the pile of sticks that I’d set up beforehand. I touched one from the pile. Not dry, but dry enough. Good, on to step two.

I took two of the sticks, placed one on the ground, placed the other in between my palms, and started rubbing my hands as quickly as possible, attempting to start a fire with nothing but friction. It was tortuously slow, and my palms had long since passed the point of pain and had grown numb, but after what felt like an eternity, saw the tiniest wisps of smoke drifting from my makeshift tinder. I kept at it, until, when the sun had begun to sink in the horizon, my labours produced a roaring flame. Onward to step three.

“Blood and flesh, bone and sinew. Death, the payment for strengh renewed.” I threw the boar’s corpse into the flames. “I offer this sacrifice to me, Luna Invicta.” As soon as the white smoke drifted towards me, I felt a rush of power, but only barely.

Sacrifices were traditionally prepared meticulously, with only the blood, fat, and bone being burned as an offering to one of the divine. Couple that with the fact that I was making an offering from myself to myself, and what I did was barely a proper ritual; it evoked just enough of the sacrifices of old that it was recognized as such by the Thoughtstream by only the slimmest of margins. As it stands, it only granted me a sliver of additional energy, tainted by the boar’s essence as its life was converted to faith. Not much to work with, but it was enough.

I closed my eyes, grabbed hold of the boar’s essence, and let my being delve into the Thoughstream.

One second.

Bleeding on all sides. Surrounded in the whirling maelstrom. I feel my anima leeching out into the aether. My very being dissolving, the idea that was me wishing to return to the unconscious.

Two seconds.

Foreign thoughts enter into my mind. The ideas of the ground, the sky, the trees overwhelm me. The concept of standing, the concept of existing, the concept of being, multiplied by the untold millions of things that surrounded me. Insects like dots, animals like torches, my own essence a blazing lighthouse. All I could see was the light of life, and it was blinding.

Three seconds.

I focused on myself, reinforced my identity. I am me, my thoughts are my own, I am separate, I am whole. Faith and will intermingled, defining who I am, insulating my essence from the Thoughtstream, stopping the bleeding, if only for a moment.

Four seconds.

With my essence, my very nature, yearning to return to the aether, I grabbed hold of the faith that I needed, and set out a searching pulse. 10 metres. 100 metres. 200 metres, still no response. 300 metres. 400 metres, more of me was lost, I could hold for but a second more. 500 met-

There! The pulse finally found a source of faith 500 metres due north. The one that I’d been looking for. Even with my mind otherwise occupied, I felt my shoulders relax. All was not lost, I had a way forward. I could- hold on… Did the source just get closer? 450 metres, then 400 in less than the span of second, and it was dropping fast, zeroing in on me.

I pulled out of the Thoughtstream as quickly as I could. In my hurry, I managed to leave bits of my faith behind, but I could worry about that later. I scrambled to grab my backpack, and I ran.

I was foolish. It was born of desperation, but it was foolishness all the same. The only reason that I’d used my faith like a sonar, sending out a searching pulse and waiting for a response, was to conserve what I had. Had I just decided to delve fully into the Thoughtstream, expand my consciousness within it as I’d done while I was in Vanafreya’s domus, I would have lost a greater amount of faith, but I wouldn’t have caught the attention of whatever it was that was now coming for me.

As I ran, I heard the sound of trees being torn apart, the earth beneath me shuddered, and gales of cutting wind heralded its arrival. I cursed the circumstances that forced me into this. Of course it was unbelievably hopeful to think that the source of faith within the Amazon would be the First God’s corpse. Of course that was hope that crossed the border of optimism into the realm of naivete. Now I had to face something which possessed such overwhelming force that even the ancient trees of the Amazon couldn’t slow it down.

What had I awakened? Something that could command this much power, that was worshipped to this degree… It could only be one of the Ancient Ones, one that somehow escaped imprisonment by my kind, or extermination by El. I had just called upon my death. But it’s not going to take me down without a fight.

I brought my backpack in front of me, poured faith into it, and braced for impact.

I felt a blast of wind as it stopped before me. I gripped my laptop, ready to fight.

The sun had not fully set, I wouldn’t be able to call upon the moon for power. The odds of me winning are slim.

It didn’t attack me yet. Seconds passed like hours, the only thing I could hear was my heartbeat. I reinforced my body, found the strength within my legs, and sprang forth, aiming to bash it with my backpack, to strike the first blow. To survive.

“Mistress Luna Invicta?”

I stopped, and looked at the man before me.

He was tall, even at my full height I only barely reached his chest. In his right hand he held a roughly hewn club that was easily as long as I was high. Long scraggly hair, and an equally unkempt beard should have made him look like a savage. But, though he was clad only in a lion’s skin, his chiselled physique and sun bronzed complexion told me that the man who stood before me was far beyond the limits of nobility and savagery. The man before me held himself with a natural charisma that told me that he was a hero among heroes, a god among men. As befitting of he to whom all heroes are judged against.

“Junogloris?” I could barely believe my eyes. “Is that really you?”