《Phenomena the Basic Witch and the Dream Castle》Chapter 8: Mena's Delivery Service
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Deidre’s eyes, huge from shock, were only diverted from Mena for a split second when Cletus burst through the door. “What’s going on, Deidre?! Why you are hollering?!”
“There’s a sack of flour floating in my huh…?!”
“No, Ms. Love, I’m simply holding it!” Mena said, grinning casually at Deidre.
Mena was now holding the sack…or at least appeared to be. She floated it over her hand to make it look like the enormous sack of flour was in her one hand. Mena thanked her imagination for inventing such a creative way to cover for herself.
Cletus’ mouth gaped open. “Leapin’ liccans. I break my back carrying those, how is a girl like you holding it with one hand?”
Deidre’s eye twitched from disbelief, Cletus’ words clearing touching a nerve, but she shook her head. “Oh…never mind then,” she said but she headed over to Mena anyway. “Are you sure you don’t need help with that dear? It looks heavy and…”
Mena realized she’d have to release the bag or else Deidre would know. She flicked her finger deep in her pocket and it dropped to the floor, pulling her over with a loud crash.
Mena shook her head, and when her vision came to focus, Deidre was looking over her with a concerned, and quite motherly face. “You shouldn’t go lifting these all by yourself, honey bun. I’m surprised you managed to carry one all by yourself.”
Mena thought for a second before realizing that kissing up was the best to smooth over the conflict. “I…uh…want to be a good worker for you,” she said with a sincere, and slightly whining voice. “I didn’t want to disappoint you.”
Deidre’s eyes looked as if she wanted to cradle Mena in her arms, and with a kindly smile, she extended a gloved hand and pulled Mena up. “You are sweetheart. The fact you’d work so hard to impress lil ol’ me speaks a whole country mile.”
Deidre’s voice turned sharp and demanding. “Cletus, I want you to put this sack of flour on the table for Mena!”
A begrudging look came over the bumpkin’s face as he stomped rudely towards Mena, hoisted the sack of flour on his shoulder and plopped it on the table. But before he left, he turned to Deidre. “I can already tell this girl’s a whole mess o’ trouble,” he started “I don’t know how she managed to lift that sack with a single arm but it’s weirder than a buffalo on wheels.”
While Deidre’s back was turned, Mena stuck her tongue out and crossed her eyes at him again. Suddenly, Cletus’ voice leaped several octaves. “And now that lil ingrate’s taunting me!”
Deidre turned around, but Mena put her hands behind her back, pretending there was a gold halo above her head. Deidre gave her a reassuring look and turned back to Cletus. “Never underestimate a determined woman,” she said. “If you did, I wouldn’t be running this here bread business as smoothly as, well, buttered bread! I don’t think there’s anything fishy at all. You might want to get yer eyes checked.”
Deidre put her hands on her hips and gave him a firm but resolute look. Cletus seemed to retract like an outmatched snake, and shuffled away, mumbling to himself, “… I swear…I know what I see when I see it. Woman, you’re the one with the wonky eye and I don’t mean yer lazy one.”
“See?” Deidre said to Mena once he was gone. “No more heavily lifting. All that matters is to make this bread to the best of your ability. But don’t sweat it! Imagine you’re with your aunt.”
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Mena nodded and gave a cute, innocent smile; it seemed to make her employer’s day whenever she did that. Once Deidre went back into her office, Mena resolved that from now on, she wouldn’t use magic no matter what. It clearly wasn’t worth it.
Much to her surprise, Mena was a lot better at cooking by hand than she expected. Even when she could use magic, she still had to follow recipes and mix ingredients properly. The only thing she missed was using the magic to crack the eggs on the bowl. By hand, it took a lot more aim, and she wasn’t exactly the most coordinated. Several wasted liccan embryos later, Mena put her work in bread pans, loaded them into the oven and spent the next 45 minutes relaxing and waiting with Deidre for it to be done. When the time finally came, Deidre, with baking mitts replacing her elegant lady gloves, took the pans out of the oven and slid them onto the counter. “Let’s see how you did!” she said.
Much to Mena’s surprise, the loaves came out golden-brown and smelling like fresh bananas and sugar. As Deidre applauded her, she grinned brightly. All that cooking with Auntie Grizebella really paid off.
“Ooh I cannot believe I have such a hard worker!” Deidre said as she danced excitedly in place. “I’ll get the tray and the covers, and you can help me carry it out to the delivery carriage.”
They carried the bread out through the backdoor of the bakery and into the barn where a large wooden carriage awaited them. Mena marveled at it, taking note of the white bonnet that draped over it. She’d never see any kind of vehicle with wheels before. Anytime she rode anything, it was a broom, and quite clumsily too. A carriage was much more romantic, and she imagined herself beneath the cover holding hands and making out with Fabias on a starry night ride.
She helped load the tray of bread into the back of the carriage, and then, Deidre yelled loudly outside of the barn. “Cletus, get yer lazy butt in here!”
Much to their surprise, Cletus came running like his rear was on fire. As he panted with his hands on his knees, a terrified look on his face let Mena know that something wasn’t right.
“I expected you to come,” Deidre remarked. “But not that fast.”
“I wasn’t running to you!” he said back, his small eyes surprisingly large in fear. “I was harvestin’ wheat, when I bent over for a second to tie my shoe and I could swear I heard someone scream, ‘Vengeance on humankind’ before I got a nice ripe kick in the keester!”
“Well, you do have a butt that begs to be kicked,” Deidre said and Mena giggled.
Paying no attention to his sister’s barbs, Cletus continued with a very freaked out look on his face, “But I turned around and all I saw were three scarecrows. “I’m telling you, Deidre. There’s black magic afoot!”
A look of dark resolve came over the hillbilly’s face. “And I’m going to get to the bottom of it! I know there’s a witch hiding somewhere around here. And when I find it, you know I’m going to blast it to pieces.”
“I think,” Deidre started. “You’ve been spending too much time in the sun and it cooked your mind. Now help me hook these horses up to the buggy. Mena, you can wait in the carriage…Mena?!”
Mena froze for a second. As funny as it was that Straw-Woman gave Cletus a well-deserved kick, he was getting more suspicious by the second. She knew she would have to play it cool and not taunt him anymore.
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“Mena!” Deidre said as she guided a brown mare from the stables with Cletus. “Why you standin’ there?”
“Perhaps she knows sumthin’” Cletus said, irritated and chewing on a piece of wheat.
“What?! No!” Mena responded, waving her hands. “I was daydreaming. Bad habit of mine. You can even ask my aunt about that.”
“If she ain’t suspicious,” Cletus said roping the horse to the carriage. “She’s a lazy ingrate.”
“Cletus, she made this bread herself,” Deidre said, as she climbed to the reins. “All you can make is a pile of ash. I wouldn’t speak badly about our newest star employee.”
Cletus grumbled and made his way out of the barn. Clearly Deidre’s insults ticked him off more than anything.
“Let’s head out while the day’s still a fine young lady,” Deidre said, and she helped Mena onto the carriage. Deidre loudly cracked the reins and the horse traveled out through the barn doors and towards the castle town. As they departed, Mena saw Cletus eyeing her from the front of the bakery. His glare combined with his overbite made him look quite angry and menacing; it caused Mena to divert her eyes, but when she looked back, he opened the front door and went inside.
He’s a stupid hillbilly, Mena thought. There’s no way he could figure me out.
Traveling the beautiful countryside in a horse drawn carriage, Mena quickly forgot about Cletus and his suspicions. The fields of wheat divided the grassy plains into sections, making the hills look like patchwork quilts of greens and yellows, and the breeze cooled their skin on an otherwise hot day.
So,” Deidre asked, as Mena reclined with a relaxed smile. “Where are y’all from?
“Uh…” Mena sat up immediately. “Far out west?”
“Ooh the west? The open country!” Deidre gushed. “I love it! What brings you here?”
Mena stammered; her brain quickly formulated an imaginary story about her life, sort of like a backstory in one of her romance novels. Mena swooned dramatically, her hand to her head as she spoke about her life in a theatrical voice. “There comes a time in every young girl’s life when she must set out, departing from her childhood home, and scour the land searching for adventure, romance and…PASSION!”—Mena quickly murmured—"with my auntie’s permission of course!
“I love your flair, dear!” Deidre said with a delighted smile. “So, you’re traveling alone? Do you have a place to stay?”
“Uh no,” Mena responded “I saw you had room and board available and…”
“Of course. You can stay me with me,” Deidre said excitedly. “It’s so boring around here with only Cletus and bread orders to manage. I’d love for you to stay with us.”
“Really?”
Deidre’s eyes shone brightly in the sunlight and her long orange hair seemed to sparkle and shine too.
“Y’all don’t have to ask twice. I had a feelin’ you were a good seed the second I laid eyes on you.”
Mena grinned to herself. Somehow, she made a stunning first impression. Which was funny since her auntie loved to point out how lazy she was. Seems all it took was a new place to restore her drive. The horse clicked its horseshoes on the grey cobblestone as they entered the town.
“We’re here,” Deidre exclaimed as she pulled the reins, drawing the horse to a full stop. They were back in the center square and they had stopped in front of a small tavern. There were bright pink and yellow umbrellas and wooden tables on the cobblestone where people dined. The windows were tinted black and a brown sign hung overhead, rendered in gold lettering, “Mugs N’ Mutton Tavern.”
Mena helped unload the tray of banana bread; it still smelled warm and fresh. Of course, it was; it was delivered perfectly on time. A nearby barmaid opened the door so Deidre and Mena could fit inside with it. A small barricade made of bamboo divided the entranceway from the dining area. Deidre led Mena right to the counter, where the plump, grey haired owner stood. “Excellent,” the woman said, dressed in a brown apron. “You made great timing for the lunch special. Now for your pay.”
“I’ll take care of this,” Deidre said to Mena with a wink. “You can wait in the carriage if you like.”
“Sure,” Mena said, and she turned around to look at the dining area. All the tables were empty except one; it seemed all the customers would rather be enjoying some fresh sunlight than sitting inside. Mena looked closer and saw the purple suit and rainbow hat of Lol Pops sitting across from a mysterious figure.
They were hooded in the most eye-catching robe Mena had ever seen. One half of the robe was a shining blue sky with puffy clouds and the other half was a piercing red sunset with black storm clouds. Both sides billowed as the owner reclined in their chair. The person also wore a cape that was fastened with a bizarre emblem: half a black diamond and half a pink heart with an eyeball at the center. Mena could’ve sworn she saw it swivel and blink.
Mena wanted to wave ‘hi’ to Lol Pops but she was sure he was quite busy with his customer. As she walked towards the front entrance, she heard their voices from behind the bamboo barricade. First, the robed stranger spoke, “So…you met someone today?” the man asked in an extremely mellow, and strangely detached voice.
“The most fascinating sorceress I’ve ever seen,” Lol Pops said with great enthusiasm.
“Oh,” the man responded, not sounding impressed. “What makes her so special?”
“It certainly wasn’t her looks or demeanor,” Lol Pops responded, and Mena winced. “They were quite basic. But as she signed herself onto a job, I took a deeper look inside of her head.”
“And what did you see?” the mellow voice asked, though it grew slightly more pointed and focused.
“You’re never going to believe this, but the deepest well of imagicnation I’ve ever seen. Let me share it with you.”
“Yessss,” the man opposite of Lol Pops nearly sucked in his breath as he spoke. “And she is?”
“A Willow.” Lol Pops responded, and Mena swallowed hard. “Like Grizabella and Arabella…but…she differs from both. Her mind is completely unfettered, like she had never been touched by anything that would render her impure.”
“Excellent,” the man responded, his no-longer mellow voice rising with an apparent lust. “I will delight in exploring the untouched fields and valleys of her mind. She’ll be a ripe harvest for us all.”
Mena squeaked, but quickly, she covered her mouth. Who was this man and why was he so interested in exploring and harvesting her mind? His strangely mellow voice unsettled her too; there was no way this man was human. Was he possibly some kind of mind vampire who sucked out your brain juices until you were a drooling imbecile like Cletus? Mena did not want to wait around to find out. She hurried out to the horse carriage and hid in the back. She wanted to confide in Deidre so badly, but she knew she could not. She was alone with her own wild thoughts to torment her over this strange man.
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