Let me tell you something. Yes, I admit I’m strange. I do have strange hobbies for a girl. I also admit I’m not womanly. Well I’m still 14 years old, sorry if I have no breasts and backside. I really hate when people try to pity me. Just what the hell is wrong with them? Usually I don’t care but it feels awful when they say it out loud.

Afterall, here I am. A short 14yr old girl living with his father in the woods. No, not that far away, the city is about 1 hour by car. I attend school there. It’s not that bad, but we had no chance. My mother was a singer and was murdered by some gang because she refused to marry one of them. Yeah, it does not make any sense. The world and the stupid humans in it I mean. We’re kinda in a witness protection program. We didn’t have much money, and the government doesn’t fear thugs. Sucks for us.

My father is a biologist, or I should say was. After mother’s death, he quit. He currently looks like a canadian bear hunter. I’m not sure it’s a passable definition. Since he hates to meet people other than me, he only hunts. Well, free food if nothing else. He even taught me how to.

Yes, it’s hard to imagine a 14 year old, small girl with a huge hunting rifle. To give you some numbers I’m 142 cm. The remington is 108 cm. Not sure if it’s scary or funny. It was really hard to get used to it, but now it’s a piece of cake.

Also, I quite like gutting animals. Yes, I know it’s disgusting.

I have some money in spare from the animal parts I sold at the city. The market is a good place to sell anything. There are no gangsters or crazy men in this town. That’s why we were moved here. At least that’s what they said, but I already have to reputation of the “robber killer”. No I’m not a murderer. It’s just exaggeration. I broke a few bones though.

It’s not like I’m crazy strong or a martial artist or anything. Well, I’m stronger than a girl, but nowhere near a full grown man. Even if two normal thugs surround me with knives, a bit of a resolve and a telescopic baton can solve anything. Amateur fighting has two rules: longer weapon and no hesitation.

Thinking through I do seem like a boy. Short hair, no feminine sings, manly hobbies. Shit…

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While thinking strange things I arrive at home after a long day in school. I’m not good at learning. As usual since there is nothing to do (at least nothing I want to do) at home, I grab my rifle given to my by father on my 13 birthday. He knows everything about animals, plants and hunting, still not good at practical things. Well, let’s blow out some steam.

After a few hours I finally find some game. A rabbit. Will worth some change. Only the shoemaker uses leather for repair nowadays though. Maybe if I made some bows and sell it? No it takes too much time and they only use bows for sport, it won’t compare to those.

Boom, I hear a loud gunshot. I won’t catch anything this way.. After a few seconds I hear rustling and a man talking.

(Random hunter) “He said bush but which bush dammit. Why do I always have to look for them.” He said, but by that time I was already on the ground, unable to breathe.

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Oh shit… I died? Oh.. Shit… It hurts. It hurts so much I want to cry. But I can’t. It seems I’m not dead. I can still think. Even if it hurts like hell so I can’t concentrate. Focus, you got it girl, you are still alive, since you can think. That means… Ahughh…

In a dark, cold emptiness I cry in pain, for god knows how long. I lost my sense of time. It hurts. Just let me die already. I’m not a believer but if heaven, afterlife or whatever exist, just come already. I force myself to use my head too keep my sanity.

If I die, I have one last wish. Please let my father live a normal life. I don’t want him to break again.

After some time the pain decreases. It still hurts but it’s nothing compared to father’s. He will die of hunger I think. He won’t even leave his room. There is a week worth of food in the fridge. Yesterday I cooked some meat soup. But he won’t eat it if I’m not there. Please be selfish for once. I beg you.

Crying in my heart I make another wish.

‘In my next life I don’t want to forget about anything that’s important.’

Thus, my pain ended.